Unafraid (Beachwood Bay) (22 page)

My breath catches, blood pounding in my ears, desire burning in my bloodstream. My body is crying out for him, yearning for release only he can provide. I couldn’t deny him even if I tried.

“Please,” I sob, shaking in his arms. “Anything. I’m yours.”

Hunter’s lips find mine in a kiss so tender that I exhale, relaxing into him, a moment of soft bliss in the whirlwind of my desire. Then he pulls away, and before I can collect myself, he lifts me from his lap, turning me over and shoving me facedown on the mattress with my hips lifted back towards him. With a ragged groan, Hunter slams into me.

I scream.

The angle is devastating, the pleasure more than I can stand. I claw at the sheets, sobbing, as I feel him drive into me, hard and fast, pulling almost all the way out then plunging back, hitting deeper than ever before, a new dark sweetness that sets my world ablaze.

“Brit!” I hear him growl my name like a desperate prayer, but I can’t find the words to answer. I’m mindless, lost in the tornado of sensation crashing through my body, pulling me helpless towards the edge. Hunter falls against me, bracing his arms tight under my body to hold me up, still driving so fucking deep I could die from the pleasure. He reaches to find my breasts with one hand, squeezing and rolling my nipples in a sweet flash of pain.

I cry out, over again, sobbing, aching, totally surrendered.

“You’re there,” Hunter gasps behind me, a low growl against my neck. He slides his other hand lower, right to the heart of me, stroking my clit in a swift, hard caress that sends stars bursting behind my eyes. “You come when I goddam say you will, and I’m telling you, Brit, you come for me. Now!”

He plunges into me one last time, crying out with the wild force of his release, and then I can’t help it anymore. I give in, I give him everything. I break apart, shattering, screaming out his name as I fall headlong into the velvet darkness that rises up to meet me, the waves of ecstasy crashing over our bodies, again and again, until the world is black and there’s nothing left but him.

Hunter.

Only him.

I sleep restlessly, tossing and turning, and when I wake, the room is pitch-black, no sound at all but Hunter’s breathing, steady against my back. I’m spooned against him, his body warm against my naked skin, his heartbeat drumming a gentle lullaby in the dark of the night.

I carefully lift his arm and slip out from under his embrace. I grab blindly on the floor until I find fabric, pulling his shirt over my head as I tiptoe out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

The house is dark and silent, but the moon outside shines brightly through the bare windows. I flinch at the cold of the tiles on my bare feet as I scamper over to the kitchen, checking the cabinets in turn until I find a glass to pour myself some water.

I lean back against the counter and slowly drink it down, letting myself think and feel for the first time since we... Since he…

I have no words.

What happened last night was more than sex—at least, not the crude pursuit of an orgasm I’ve known before. It was a revelation, something pure and true. When Hunter was inside me, holding me, driving me on… I was more than just myself anymore. We became more—body and soul, two spirits joined, together.

I didn’t ever want to let him go.

So what makes you think you won’t fuck it up again this time?

Before I can stop myself, the first whispers of doubt begin to chorus in my mind. What comes next? I’ve never even had so much as a steady boyfriend, let alone kept a man like Hunter around. As much as we shared tonight—the barriers crumbling down around both our hearts—I can’t help but remember the way everything else in my life has gone; how everything good falls apart somehow.

How everyone I love always leaves.

I shiver, fear snaking through my veins like ice even in the warm night breeze. What if it’s not their fault? What if it’s me, doomed to screw up every good thing that ever comes my way? Hunter is, without a doubt, the best thing that’s ever happened to me, so what kind of messy, tragic ending are we heading for right now?

A noise comes from behind me, interrupting my spiral of self-doubt. “Who’s there?” I yelp, whirling around. The glass slips from my grasp and smashes, loud on the floor, as I see Hunter coming down the stairs.

“Oh,” I catch my breath. “You scared me!”

“Don’t move.” Hunter hurries down the final stairs. He’s naked save a pair of sweatpants. “You’ll cut yourself.”

I wait in place until he reaches me, lifting me up in one easy movement and placing me to sit on the counter while he flips on the light and bends over to pick the shards from the floor.

“Sorry,” I apologize quickly, “I didn’t mean to make a mess.”

Hunter sweeps the last of the fragments aside. “I didn’t know where you were.” He straightens up, and I see for the fist time the uncertainty on his face, shadowed in the moonlight. He turns away from me to put them in the trash. “I woke up, and you were gone. I thought…” He stops, shoulders hunched.

My heart catches with the painful truth. He thought I’d do what I’ve always done: disappear before things get too real; run and save my heart, no matter what the price. But after everything we’ve been through together, I know one thing for sure now: this time, I’m not listening to their lies.

“I was thirsty.” I reach for him, pulling him into the cradle between my legs, soothed just by the touch of him, his skin so warm and smooth against mine. “I came down to get a drink.”

“I know that now.” Hunter gives me a crooked grin, his hands sliding up my bare thighs. “I just…” he trails off.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I tell him softly, leaning in to drop a kiss on his forehead. “I’m right here.”

Hunter rests his head against my lips for a moment, just breathing in and out. I feel him relax, the tension in his body melting away, and I’m overcome with a sudden flash of gratitude. This is my second chance.

How many times have I wondered what might have been? How many nights did I look back at the time we spent together, aching with a secret regret that I didn’t stick around? I have a chance now with him to set all of that right: for both of us to put aside so much of our guilt and grief, and create something new together. All our own.

“Let’s go back to bed,” I whisper, finally slipping down from the counter and taking his hand, leading him back up the stairs.

“Hey, Brit?” Hunter pauses a moment on the landing. I turn back to find him watching me, his lips curling in a bashful smile. “I’m glad you stayed.”

He knows.

My mouth drops open in surprise as I stare back, into those soulful blue pools that somehow see all the way to my darkest soul. He knows I thought about leaving, that my instincts were screaming out to run.

“It’s OK to be scared,” Hunter steps closer, so I can feel the warmth radiating from his bare chest. He cups my cheek in a gentle caress, eyes full of understanding. “I know you’ve got a lifetime of disappointment haunting you, and this, right here? This is big, Brit. It doesn’t get much realer than the two of us. Any sane man would bet against you sticking around.”

I wait, heart in my chest, feeling like all my insecurities are exposed.

“But I’m not a sane man, Brit, I’m crazy about you.” Hunter smiles at me, so full of tenderness it takes my breath away. “So you be scared, and freak out, and feel whatever it is you need to feel. Just promise me you’ll do it here, by my side. Because I can’t take losing you again,” he adds, determined. “If you run, I’m running after you, and dragging you right back home again. You understand?”

I nod, a shy smile curving across my cheeks. He understands. He knows a part of me will always be at war with myself, but he’s not giving up on me all the same. Relief washes over me, bright in the dark hallway. I’m not in this alone: I can’t make the same mistake again, because he won’t let me.

He’s on my side.

Hunter pushes me gently ahead of him into the bedroom. “C’mon, it’s like, 3:00 a.m. and I need my beauty sleep.”

I giggle. “Don’t you mean, I do?”

“You don’t need anything,” he tells me, yawning. “Except to keep your hands off my covers. Don’t think I didn’t notice you stole them all.”

“I was cold!” I protest, sliding in next to him. Hunter scoops me against his body, nestling me into the crook of his arm.

“Better?” he whispers. I nod, snuggling into him. “Good,” he murmurs, sleepy. “‘Cause this time, I’m not letting you go.”

Hunter keeps his promise. He holds me all night, his body curled against mine, his arms encircling me in a tender, warm embrace.

I can’t sleep; I just lie there, listening to the sound of his even breaths and marveling at the contentment cloaking my body in a bone-deep haze of peace.

I’ve never held a man like this; never stayed to see the sunrise filter softly through the drapes. I’ve never felt so close to anyone, so naked and exposed.

So loved.

I roll in his arms to face him, watching the peaceful expression on his face as he sleeps. He’s a work of art, naked and glorious right in front of me, and I can’t stop myself from reaching out and gently tracing the contours of his face with feather-light fingertips. The shock of hair flopping over his forehead; the light dusting of freckles across his nose. I trace his cheekbones, his jaw, his gorgeous full lips, memorizing every inch of skin. My heart beats faster, just to touch him like this; catch a glimpse of him so vulnerable and at peace.

Hunter lets out a sleepy yawn and shifts, flinging his arm out across the bed and snuggling deeper into the pillows.

I could get used to this.

The thought makes me catch my breath, my body tensing with the muscle memory of old betrayals, but I force myself to relax again, lulled by the steady rise and fall of his chest.

He’s not like the others.

Hunter is different, I know that now. For the first time, I can see the future beckoning me: a hazy golden promise of mornings waking just like this; long nights spent tangled up in his arms. Safe and loved, the way I’ve never even dared to dream.

The possibility shivers through me, so tempting, so real. I could be this happy tomorrow, and every tomorrow after that too. I could be his, always.

And he would be mine.

A fierce surge of possession swells in my chest, and now my fingertips are roving further across his body. I trace over the curve of his bicep, the muscled ridges of his stomach.
Mine
, I think, desire rising in me.
All mine
. I brush my fingertips lower still, delving under the covers. I find him hard and ready for me, rising to my touch. My breath catches—

“Morning.” Hunter rolls swiftly, suddenly trapping me beneath him against the sheets.

I flush, caught red-handed. “Good morning.”

“It’s sure shaping up to be.” Hunter gives me a lazy grin.

I glance away, self-conscious. For the first time, I remember what a sight I must make: tangled hair, smudged make-up. God knows what last night has done to me. I reach quickly to swipe under my eyes, but Hunter catches my hand.

“You’re beautiful,” he breathes, gently smoothing hair back from my cheek. I roll my eyes, awkward, but he laughs. “You are. Like this, just you.”

He leans down and kisses me slowly. I breathe it all in, reaching up around his neck to pull him closer. I feel him smile against my mouth. The kiss deepens, long and true, as he rolls me slowly across the bed. I savor it, every moment, such a simple thing—a kiss—but oh, how it makes my heart sing.