Unchanged (2 page)

I shook my head. I could ignore my lack of a promising future, if only for a day, if only to give my mind a short break from worry.

I had walked so far into the forest I couldn't see the town or ocean, though I could hear the latter if I strained my ears above the wind whispering among the trees. Total solitude. I smiled, pleased with myself, and searched for a log on which to sit. It was easy enough to find a fallen tree and I made myself comfortable on it.

Slipping my backpack off my shoulders, I unzipped it and pulled out my sketchpad. Next I retrieved my drawing pens. I pulled my hair into a ponytail to keep it out of the way and gazed around, trying to decide which tree I wanted to draw. I rubbed my right upper arm, which often ached in damp weather, as I surveyed my surroundings.

Drawing was one of my few real interests. I had no training beyond Drawing I at school and didn't think I was that good at it, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. While drawing, I could forget about my life and think about nothing but lines. I had books filled with my sketches of trees and the peaks of roofs. The tree I chose that day was thick and old, the branches twisting up to the sky. Something complicated for the empty day looming ahead of me. The lines of the bark would keep me occupied for hours.

I lost myself in the drawing, unaware of time passing. The ache of my arm faded into the background as I concentrated on the forming picture. The non-silence of nature was deep and comforting. I could hear the occasional animal scamper by, unseen, and sometimes a twig or dry leaf fluttering to the undergrowth, shaken free by the breeze. The forest smelled damp and earthy. It was the scent of decomposing leaves, but it wasn't unpleasant. I decided I would have to do this more often. Maybe I would go on weekends when everyone else was sleeping in. But then I would have to get up early. I didn't like getting up early.

The sudden sound of a twig cracking, the loudest sound I'd heard in hours, startled me and my head snapped up. A flash of black caught my eye among the trees. My first thought was that I had spotted a bear, but thankfully it was only a man. Probably a hiker who'd gone off the trails. He stepped out from between the trees, walking toward me. I closed my sketchbook and eyed him warily. I hoped he only wanted directions.

He stopped a few feet from me. He was dressed all in black and looked a few years older than me, maybe in his early twenties. Glossy black hair reached to his shoulders and his skin had a natural tan. He had a prominent, slightly aquiline nose which would have seemed out of place on a weaker face, but his face was strong, full of character, the muscles sharp and the angles definite. I could see the hollows beneath his high, flat cheekbones and the strong muscles of his jaw. His full, terse lips and heavy eyes were only somewhat softened by gentle curves.

My breath caught as I stared at him. He was, I realized, rather beautiful. Unconventionally so. And I had seen him before. Somewhere in this very forest. We had spoken, we had held hands. We . . .

What was I thinking? No, I hadn't seen him before. I had no idea who he was. Did I? I felt anxious. My hand itched to free my hair from its ponytail so I could use it to hide the red birthmark, but I settled for turning slightly away from him.

"Hello," I said nervously. "Are you lost?"

"No," he said.

I could feel myself blushing, for some reason, which surely made my birthmark look even worse. I looked down at the book in my hands, trying to hide my face even more. "Do you, um, live around here then?"

"Yes."

I cleared my throat and tried to feign confidence, though it was still difficult to look directly at him. I wasn't sure why I was trying to be friendly when what I really should have been doing was leaving. Surely this was how all kidnappings and disappearances began. "Who are you?" I asked in spite of myself.

"I am called Ahaziel."

Ahaziel—such an unusual name. An angel's name.
Ahaziel.
I imagined how, later, I would say it while alone in my room, savoring the sound like a sigh. I wanted to talk to him forever. I wanted words, any words, to pour from his lips and swirl around me.

"I'm Lilly," I told him, trying not to let him know how strongly his presence affected me. Trying not to let him see how freaked out I was that I'd just told him my name. What an idiot move.

He was silent and I chanced a glance up at him. Our eyes met and locked. He stole my breath.

After a moment I tore my gaze away and came to my feet. I felt shaky and disoriented. "It's going to rain," I said, fidgeting with my things. "I should probably get going."

Putting my book and pens back into my bag, I felt the first drops hit my face. A moment later the water was roaring down, soaking everything.

"Damn," I muttered.

I looked once over my shoulder at Ahaziel and saw he hadn't moved. The rain poured down on him and he just stood there, watching my retreat. The steadiness of his gaze sent shivers through my body.

"I've got to go," I said, flustered and in a hurry to get out of there despite feeling compelled to stay. "Um, it was nice meeting you."

I turned from him and started to walk away. After a few steps my foot slid away from me on a patch of slick leaves, throwing me completely off balance. I landed on my back, my near-empty backpack doing nothing to cushion my fall. I found myself staring up at bare tree branches tangling over the clouded sky. I was breathless and blinking against an assault of raindrops.

In an instant Ahaziel was at my side. "Are you hurt?" he asked, his dark-lashed eyes urgently searching my own.

I moved parts of my body experimentally and found nothing hurt, aside from my right ankle. I couldn't tell whether it was broken or not, but it didn't feel good. With dread I thought of waiting on the wet forest floor for an ambulance or, worse, limping the watery miles back to town while my ankle swelled and throbbed with pain. I felt tears of frustration gather behind my eyes.

"My ankle," I choked out once I had taken a few deep breaths to calm myself. "I think I must have sprained it."

"Don't worry," Ahaziel said. "I'll take you somewhere you can rest."

Before I could protest that there wasn't really any shelter for miles, he gathered me in his arms and started walking purposefully through the forest.

"What are you
doing
?" I demanded. I struggled only a little, afraid he might drop me and I would land on my ankle. "You should have just left me there! We don't even know each other!"

He didn't respond, just kept walking. Promising myself I would flee once we got wherever we were going, I chose to remain silent. I kept my head tucked in, afraid of stray branches whacking it, but he was surefooted and seemed to know a clear path to his destination.

It didn't take long to reach the edge of the forest. When I raised my head I saw we had moved even further north. We emerged out of the trees onto a large, overgrown plot of land. A house stood there, old and neglected. The orange-red roof was horribly dull and the white paint on the siding peeled in large curls, revealing rotting gray boards beneath. The porch sagged and there were gaps in the railing. Parts of the picket fence had collapsed on the grass. The whole property looked so desolate, so forgotten.

To the west, on the cliff overlooking the ocean, stood a lighthouse. It was then I knew where we had come. This was Havelock Point. A lightkeeper and his family had once lived in the house and he'd tended the lighthouse each night. But the lighthouse hadn't been used for years and the house had been abandoned just as long. I tried to recall any other information I might have heard about the place, but nothing came to mind.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked.

"It was the closest shelter," he said as he stepped onto the creaking porch, out of the rain. I cringed, hoping our weight wouldn't bust a hole in the wood, but he managed to open the door while still carrying me and soon we were safely inside.

The foyer was a sizable space, but the dark walls made it seem much smaller. With only two small windows coated heavily in salt, I doubted it ever saw much light even on a sunny day. We moved ahead into the living room, which had light-colored walls and many windows. Through a doorway to the left I glimpsed the kitchen, the faded yellow walls dark with dirt, the appliances so ancient and rusty they surely didn't work any longer. In one corner I saw a wooden table with matching chairs, all of which seemed as if they might shudder to the floor at any second.

"How did you know about this place?" I asked as Ahaziel set me gently on the surprisingly sound floorboards. The abandoned house wasn't the nicest of shelters, and it gave me the creeps a little. It was the perfect place to murder me and hide my body.

"It's been here a long time," he answered.

He ducked his head and concentrated on my ankle. He folded up the hem of my jeans and removed my shoe. I watched his long, brown fingers move lightly across my winter-white skin, checking for bruises and swelling. Finding none, he began to massage the ankle lightly, soothing away the pain. I bit my lip, my body tense. No guy had ever touched me so gently, with such strange intimacy. Especially not one I had just met.

"Um, thanks," I mumbled self-consciously. "It feels much better."

He looked up abruptly and I noticed how very rigid he looked, how intense his gaze had become. I recoiled slightly, feeling all of a sudden that he hated me. Lowering my eyes, I freed my wet hair from its ponytail and finger-combed the dark gold ridges to cover the left side of my face.

"Why do you do that?" Ahaziel asked.

"What?"

His silence said
You know what
. I didn't look at him, too embarrassed to respond, and absently let one hand wander beneath the hair to my birthmark. What did Ahaziel think when he looked at me?

I glanced up, wondering if he still expected an answer. The look in his eyes had softened, but still there was something peculiar about the expression in them. It almost seemed as if he knew me, or knew something secret about me, something even
I
didn't know. But how could he? We had only just met.

Looking around, I tried to judge how long it would take me to run to the front door. Surely I could make it before he caught me. But what about my ankle? And could I make it through the forest on my own? I knew the way to town, but I wasn't accustomed to fleeing potential captors through the woods.

I cleared my throat. "How long do you think we'll have to wait here?"

"That depends on how soon you feel comfortable walking."

I flexed my ankle and moved it around. It
did
feel much better, but I still wasn't sure it was strong enough to bear me if I had to run.

"Maybe I should wait a little longer," I suggested tentatively, wondering if I was making the right decision.

Ahaziel nodded. "I'll wait with you."

A curious warmth flooded my body. What if we got stuck here all night for some reason? What if it got too cold to sit apart? I imagined the two of us squeezing close together for warmth, our bodies bathed in candlelight, our conversation intimate and hushed . . .

I realized Ahaziel was studying me unwaveringly and my cheeks flushed. I grabbed my shoe and tugged it on, trying not to let him see my shaking hands. It almost seemed as if he knew every thought passing through my mind, or at least he somehow looked like he knew. If he could read my thoughts, I mused, he'd know I was picturing him kissing me. Maybe he would indulge me, just so I'd know if it was as good as I imagined.

I could have smacked myself. I didn't even know him and had no reason to believe he found me attractive. Not that it mattered. One minute I was daydreaming intimate things about him, the next I was reminding myself he might want to kill me. I had to get my head on straight. Maybe I'd hit it when I fell and now my thoughts were muddled and not entirely sane.

He gestured at the backpack, which I kept on so I could be prepared to leave in case he started exhibiting suspicious behavior. "You were drawing earlier," he stated.

"Yeah," I said sheepishly. "It's what I like to do."

I felt relieved when he didn't ask to see what I had been drawing. I would have shown him if he had, but I really preferred to keep my drawings private. I was very self-conscious about them, like I was about everything else. I had a hard time completing assignments in art class. That was one reason I had gone to the forest, so no one would ask questions or offer suggestions about my work.

Then Ahaziel had shown up.

"Do you come here a lot?" I asked, gesturing around at the house. I was feeling more and more uneasy as the minutes passed. I really didn't like this place and it had nothing to do with the guy who'd brought me here.

He shrugged. "Not often."

Apparently he didn't like volunteering information about himself. Every question I'd asked had been met with a short answer. He hadn't asked anything of me. Was I so uninteresting? It was true I had basically no friends, but I'd never thought I was devoid of personality or anything like that. Surely I had enough character that even someone as gorgeous as Ahaziel would find me somewhat intriguing.

I had to ask myself why I cared. I shouldn't have. But it was there, a strange need for approval. Could I have developed sympathy for my captor so quickly? I wasn't even sure he
was
holding me captive. I felt an odd connection to him nonetheless.