Undaunted Love (PART TWO): Banished Saga, Book 3.5 (16 page)

As I emerged onto the boardwalk in front of the station, I paused. The hills were covered in a light covering of snow with the wild grass protruding from it a burnished gold, glimmering in the sunlight. I smiled as I realized, with Christmas only five days away, we’d have a white Christmas this year. Puddles and muddy patches marred the dirt streets, and the horses riding by had muddy splotches on their legs and haunches. I shivered as a cold breeze blew from the Hellgate Canyon and began my short walk toward Main Street and home.

I pushed open the workshop door, shivering with appreciation at the blast of warmth that emerged from within. I tiptoed in, glancing toward Ronan’s workspace, which was empty. My gaze swept the room and saw Ronan, his back toward me, as he sat near the rear of the workshop, facing a stooped over Gabriel.

“You know there’s a good reason for her not writing you,” Ronan argued.

“You’d think she’d have the decency to write more frequently. Does she really think a letter a week is enough?”

“I’m sure I saw you receiving more letters than just once a week,” Ronan said. I watched him lift himself up with his arms in an attempt to settle himself again in his chair.

“That was until a few weeks ago. Now they’ve trickled down to nothing.” Gabriel leaned forward and pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s like before, when she was so far from me. It’s like that Boston society gets ahold of her somehow and changes her. Changes us.”

Ronan snorted, hiding my dismayed gasp. “I doubt that, Gabe. I bet there’s a good reason she’s more silent than you’d wish.”

Gabriel sighed. “I just want her home, Ro. Or I need to go there. I can’t handle being separated from her. These past six weeks have been hell.”

My eyes filled with tears as I watched Gabriel. I took a cautious step into the workshop, and I must have made some noise because his head jerked up. After a moment, where he stared at me as though I were an apparition, he gave a whoop of joy and moved toward me.

“Clarissa!” he said as he pulled me into a tight embrace, pulling me off my feet and twirling me around for a few moments. After setting me down, he held my face between his palms, gently swiping away my tears with his thumbs. “Darling, are you all right?”

“I’m fine,” I whispered, leaning into him and breathing in his musky, woodsy scent. “I missed you so much, Gabriel. I’m sorry I didn’t write more. I … I couldn’t.”

He kissed the side of my head before he pushed me away to study my eyes. “You couldn’t?” His puzzled tone matched the confusion on his face.

“Gabriel, I need to talk with you,” I whispered.

He paled, and I gripped his arm, afraid for a moment he would faint. “Of course,” he said. “Ronan, Clarissa and I will be upstairs.” He clasped my hand and pulled me behind him.

I smiled a hello to Ronan as I followed Gabriel upstairs to our living space.

“Rissa, tell me now what happened in Boston. Please.” He held me close, and I felt a tremble go through him.

“Oh, darling. Everything is fine in Boston,” I whispered. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him. His arms clasped me tightly to him, and he groaned as he deepened the kiss.

After only a few moments, he pushed away, our foreheads still touching, and he looked into my eyes. “Then why didn’t you write more? Why did you write about the weather and all the things you knew I’d never care about?”

“I wrote you about Richard, Florence and Jeremy,” I protested.

“Yes, but never about you,” he murmured. “I felt like I’d lost you.”

I closed my eyes for a moment and stepped away from him. “You didn’t lose me, Gabriel. I knew the minute I arrived in Boston, disparaged and frowned upon because I was not in the proper clothes for my father’s burial, that I had no desire to live there again. I didn’t want to worry you with how poorly things were going for Colin and me.”

“There’s more you aren’t telling me.”

“And there is news that needs to be told in person, darling.” I reached forward and grasped one of his large hands, kissing his palm. I took a deep breath and then held it to my belly. “We’re going to have a baby.”

He stared at me blankly for a moment. “What?”

“I realized, not long after I arrived in Boston, that I was with child.”

“Why didn’t you write me?”

I hated the hurt I heard in his voice. “I didn’t want to tell you in a letter. I wanted to see you, be held by you when I did. Thus, every time I wrote you, I felt like I wrote around the most important news.”

At his persistent silence, I began to ramble. “Please try to understand, darling.” I reached up and pushed a lock of ebony hair off his forehead. “Sophronia advised me to return to you, even though I worried that Savannah needed me.”

A brilliant smile bloomed on his face. “A baby?” I nodded as he gave a whoop of joy, picked me up and spun me around again. When I had settled, with my skirts swirling at my ankles, he asked, “You’re certain?”

“Yes. I had the best doctors in Boston examine me. On Sophronia’s orders. And all three of the experts agreed I’m to expect a child in early summer.” I grinned, unable to hide my joy.

Gabriel tugged me with him and sat with me on his lap, and I felt him trembling gently. “Never scare me like that again,” he said urgently. “I thought you’d been harmed again. And the thought that I hadn’t been there to help you once again was too much to bear.”

“I wished for you every day,” I whispered into his neck. “I hated not being able to talk with you about what was happening, about why people were being so mean. About Colin losing the forge. I needed you, more than I can ever say.”

Gabriel’s arms tightened around me. “You’re so strong, my darling, that I often fear you don’t need me.”

“Never doubt that I do. Knowing you are beside me, supporting me, gives me strength.” I kissed his neck. “I missed you, Gabriel.”

He groaned. “You have no idea how much I missed you.”

I peppered him with kisses along his jaw, neck and upper shoulders.

“Rissa—” He pushed me away, and I frowned at the serious expression in his eyes. “I don’t want to do anything that could harm the baby.”

“As you can imagine, I was mortified to ask about marital relations,” I said with a blush. “But one of those experts Sophie had me see said there would be no harm to the baby.”

I shrieked as Gabriel stood, carrying me in his arms and strode toward the bed. “Well then, in that case, I’ll put my faith in that expert. I’ve missed you, my Clarissa.” He placed me on the bed and leaned forward, kissing me, as his nimble hands worked to free me from my clothes.

As I squirmed out of my dress, he paused, resting his forehead against my belly. He kissed it once, then again, before holding me close for a moment. I threaded my fingers through his hair as he trembled.

“Gabriel?” I whispered.

He raised tear-brightened eyes. “I want this baby. Never doubt that, Rissa.” I nodded in understanding. “But I can’t lose you.”

“Darling.” I reached for him, gently tugging at him until he moved up the bed and lay next to me. I kissed him and pulled him into my arms, holding him as he shuddered. I inched backward so I could meet his eyes.

“I can’t promise you everything will be all right. I will promise I’ll do everything possible to have a healthy birth. To have ten more children if that’s our desire,” I teased as I kissed away a tear.

I felt as much as heard his laugh, before I was lost to his kisses and being in his arms again.

***

“GABRIEL, THERE’S SOMETHING ELSE I must tell you,” I whispered. He lay with his head on my sternum, and I feared I had waited too long to speak as I heard a soft snuffle sound.

“Mmm, give me a moment,” he said with a sigh as he rolled to his side and settled my back along his chest. “Why is it you always want to talk afterward?”

I heard the teasing in his voice and smiled. I twisted until I faced him and saw the amusement fade as concern filtered into his eyes.

“I’m fine,” I whispered with a tender smile. I leaned in for a quick kiss and had to force myself to back away before I forgot what I needed to tell him. He groaned as I settled again, still facing him, his hand playing in my long hair and tracing it down my arm.

A contented smile played on his lips, and his eyes closed.

“Darling, please,” I whispered.

He opened his eyes and nodded. “Whatever it is, Clarissa, it’ll be fine.”

I shook my head slightly. “Cameron didn’t die in that fire.”

“What?” Gabriel asked. He half rose, leaning on his elbow as his free hand gripped my shoulder. Fury kindled to life in his eyes.

“I saw him in Boston. He’s very much alive.”

“There was a body, Rissa. Seb almost died saving him. And now Seb’s lost his job because they thought he stole the company money.”

I shook my head. “I swear to you, Cameron is alive. As alive as you and me. And he boasted to me about taking the money.”

“Although he’d deny it if confronted,” Gabriel said. He sighed in disgust when I nodded in agreement to his statement. “Dammit.” He closed his eyes on a long sigh. “I should have traveled with you. I should never have let you travel alone, let you face that by yourself.”

“How were you to know?” I asked with a tender smile. At his hesitation, my smile faded. “What aren’t you telling me?”

He met my gaze. “I’ve had my suspicions for a while that he didn’t die. A man well known on Front Street disappeared at the same time as the fire. A well-liked man. More often than not he was drunk as a skunk, but he was amiable, and folks sought out his company.”

“And?”

“And I heard from a porter that a man with a striking resemblance to Cameron had boarded the train east the morning after the fire. No one would have been looking for him, and word wasn’t out yet that he’d died. I thought the porter mistaken. But as we learned this other man had disappeared and that all the money from the company safe was stolen during the fire, it made me wonder if he hadn’t been correct.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about your suspicions?”

“What was I to say?” He flushed with chagrin and anger. “You were finally finding peace after his death. You didn’t have to worry that, every time you left the house, you’d be tormented by him or by something someone said about him as you were out. You were blossoming, and I couldn’t bear to take it away on unfounded suspicions.” He stroked my cheek, his earnest gaze entreating me to understand. “And then your da died.”

I nodded my agreement, turning my face to kiss his palm. “Why didn’t you tell anyone else?”

“Well, Seb, Ronan and I thought about talking to the police, but we knew they’d brand us as a group of fools, trying to pin the allegations against Seb on a dead man.”

“But he’s not dead, Gabriel.”

“We have no proof.” He held up his fingers to my lips to still my words. “Even if you were to speak to the police, it wouldn’t matter. They wouldn’t take you seriously because you’re a woman. They’d think you were saying these things because everyone knows you had a falling out, and this would be your way to pay him back.”

I glowered at Gabriel. “I hate that you’re mostly right.”

“Only mostly?” he asked with a small smile.

“We endeavored to have a picture of him taken.”

“Anyone could say it was when you were still in Boston before you came west last year.”

“Yes, but the first picture on the roll is of a newspaper dated on the day I met him at a tea parlor.”

“You met him? Alone?” Gabriel asked, his eyes fiery with concern and anger.

“Yes, it was the only way he’d speak with me. And, unbeknownst to me, Colin had arranged for a newspaperman to be there too. He’s now investigating the entire sordid affair.”

“Why?”

“Cameron wasn’t shy in his boasts to me about what he’d done,” I whispered. “Seemed to think anything he had to do to leave Missoula with money was justified.”

“You’re all brilliant,” he said as he swooped down and kissed me quickly on the lips. I nodded my agreement. “I can’t wait to tell Seb.”

“How has he been?”

“Despondent. He lost almost everything due to Cameron. It’s been hard for him to have the townsfolk look at him with suspicion. Even if we exonerate him, I think it’ll be some time before he feels welcomed here. Trusted.”

“I never thought I could hate a person, but I really think I hate Cameron.”

Gabriel’s eyes clouded. “What did Cameron do to you?”

I blinked away tears. “Nothing. Just scared me. But I kneed him in his delicate region and left.”

“Delicate region?” Gabriel smirked, pride shining from his eyes.

“It’s what Jeremy called it.” I waved my hand around and blushed as red as a beet. At Gabriel’s laugh, I giggled.

He reached forward and traced my eyebrows, my cheek and then my collarbone with reverence. “Did he threaten you, my darling?”

“I’m fine, Gabriel,” I whispered.

“Share this memory with me, so that the burden of it will not torment you.” He leaned forward and kissed my nose.

“He pushed me against a wall, hid us in a servants’ entrance and said it was fortuitous we were together in a city so far from you,” I whispered. “I tried to escape him, right away, but he’s very strong. Well, at least stronger than I am. And I couldn’t break free.

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