Under the Burning Stars (28 page)

Peter held her tighter.
“I don’t know what I would do.”

“I feel like I should hate her because of what she was and did. But she was m
y mom and she was there for me.”

“Did you talk to her?”

“Yes. She said it was my destiny. And that if we didn’t give ourselves to Havok, everyone would die.” She couldn’t stop crying.

There was a knock at the door and then it slowly opened. Gabriel emerged.

“We’re having a meeting later,” he said.

Ava’s stomach dropped. This was it. She was going to
be banished from the coven and would have to fend for herself against Havok. Warm tears slid down her cheeks and her necklace glowed. The room suddenly felt smaller and she couldn’t seem to catch her breath.

“What’s wrong?” Peter asked, but a ringing in her ear
muffled his voice.

Gabriel walked closer and placed a hand on her shoulder
to steady her. He gently shook her and made her look him the eye. “Nothing will happen to you. Yes, you did a very irresponsible and quite idiotic thing but Savina will not punish you like that.” He spoke with disappointment in his voice, but there was a hint of concern.

“Why?”

“She sees you as her child. She would never banish you.”

“But if an
Enchanter betrays her coven—.”

“Colden will be fine.”

How could he be so sure? What she did was unforgivable. Maybe she should leave the coven. She was unwanted because of her thoughtless and selfish act. Natalia was right. She did only think of herself. Ava could save a lot of trouble and heartache by leaving. It wouldn’t be easy, but it was the right thing to do.

Ava barely felt Peter stroke her hair as they lay on her bed. She watched the sun move across the sky through the window and replayed the events of the previous night over and over. She still couldn’t remember anything after seeing her mother. Her own mother said it was her destiny. She’d been acting like a Cimmerian for months now. Aaron should strip her of her powers and exile her.

Melissa came to check on her and told her that Colden was conscious, but wasn’t well. After
everything Colden had done for Ava that was how she repaid him. She was a selfish and irresponsible person.

Was this what her mother wanted for her child? How could she not love her own daughter?
Or had she been born to the wrong side of Enchanters? Gabriel said she chose her own fate, but her actions were choosing Cimmerian.

She heard someone meekly knock on the door.

“Come in,” Peter said.

The door opened. “We came to see how you were doing.” She heard Nicole say.

Ava still faced the window, but assumed Link was with her. “I’m fine.”

Nicole and Link sat on the bench window, right in Ava’s line of sight. “I know this probably won’
t help, but we know how you feel,” she said. “We were compelled for several months and helped bomb a school.”

Ava knew the anguish Link and Nicole still suffered, but that wasn’t their fault. She
wasn’t kidnapped and forced to see the Necromancer. Ava went by her own volition. And killed two Ephemerals. And caused two more to lose their memories of their closest friends.

“Thanks, but this is something I did myself,” Ava said.

Nicole shook her head. “People make mistakes.”

“I should be the one to blame,” Link said. “I brought up necromancy to you.”

“It wasn’t you.”

Someone knocked on the door and she heard it open.

“It’s time.” Gabriel’s voice came from the entrance.

Her stomach clenched and she felt as if she would be sick. She took a deep breath and moved to a sitting position.

Peter took her hand and squeezed it.

They followed Gabriel downstairs into the library. When they entered, Ava tensed. Having several glares in her direction made her stomach ache.
She felt as if she walked into her funeral. Was this how Savina felt when she was accused of dark magic?

It was clear who still h
ad her back, which weren’t many, but they stood beside Ava and Peter. She looked to the other side and saw Gabriel stand next to Natalia, in between the groups. Their eyes met, but she couldn’t read his.

Aaron stood at the front of the room flank
ed by Gustav, Maggie, and Savina. “As you are all aware, something terrible has happened. When the spirits possessed Ava, their dark power overcame her. They used her power to try to kill Colden.”

Ava’s chin quivered, but she held the tears at bay.

“Colden is in severe condition,” Aaron said. “Maya explained to us that there is a very rare flower that contains the antidote to Colden’s illness. We have discussed this at length, and with Savina’s insistence, Savina, Maya, and I are to leave for a couple of days. We must find a Lotus Flower in order to save Colden. Maggie and Gustav will be in charge while Natalia and Alena will watch over Colden. We do not think this was the start of the war, however, while we are gone, you are to train. No one is to leave this Manor unless absolutely necessary. You all will be safe here and we will not be away for long.”

“Wait, you’re leaving us when we’re seconds away from a war with the Cimmerians?” Link asked.

“We must save Colden,” Savina demanded. “Nothing will happen while we are gone.”

“Do you really think this is a good idea?”

Savina narrowed her eyes at him. “Do not doubt us. This is important and you will be fine. The Cimmerians will not strike until the new moon. I know their tactics.”

Aaron held up his hand. “Do not fret. Savina, Maya, and I will be back well before then.”

“What about my mom and Ava’s dad?” Thomas asked.

“We are going to put them somewhere safe,”
she said. “Away from here.”

Ava’s stomach dropped. She d
idn’t want her father to leave.

“When we return, we will discuss Ava’s fate,” Savina said.

Guilt weighed on Ava. Her knees weakened. She couldn’t believe she caused this. All because she had to know the truth. Ava finally looked up and met Savina’s eyes.

I am so disappointed in you.

Ava thought back the only thing she could say, but it would never be enough.
I’m sorry
.

They adjourned the meeting and Ava backed out of the room and darted up the stairs and down the hall to her room. She closed the door and slid to the floor with her head in her hands.

What have I done? What’s going to happen to me?

Ava clutched her necklace and felt the
anger and hurt and disappointment from everyone. She wasn’t sure how much she could take, but she forced herself to endure it all. She had done this to herself.

Her door opened and Peter walked through and knelt beside her. He pulled her against him.

“I hate what I’ve done. I’ve brought you into this and now I’m going to be gone.”

“You don’t know that, Ava.”

“Yes I do. You should go.”

“Don’t shut me out.”

“I’m not, Peter.”

“We’re in this together no matter what.”

His words only made her weep more.

“What will you do when I’m no longer in the coven? I’ve betrayed them
so many times. I knew I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Didn’t you hear what Gabriel said? Savina would never banish you. If they really wanted you out, don’t you think they would have done it already? They wouldn’t wait to banish you.”

Peter was right. She wiped her tears and drew a shaky breath. “I still don’t know what’s going to happen to me.”

“I know it may be hard, but for now just worry about training and honing your skills.”

She nodded and looked at him. He hadn’t gotten upset with her or left her. “You’re too good to me.”

“Ava, I love you. I will stand beside you no matter what.” He laid her head against his chest
and she felt him kiss the top of her head. “Is it weird that they left when we’re days away from a war?”

She lifted a shoulder. “Kinda. I
guess.”

“
You’d think she’d have all kinds of things in her room to heal, since she is a Healer. Why would they just leave? The Cimmerians could be watching us.”

“But we’re protected by them in the Manor.”

“Something doesn’t feel right.”

“What are you saying?”

“You don’t think they’re the ones behind all of this, do you?”

“I briefly thought that, but no I don’t think they are.”

“They left us with two Elders, one of which is still in training. Either they think we can handle ourselves or they are behind it.”

“I don’t know. There’s a lot Savina won’t talk about.”

“Exactly. They keep us in the dark about so many things that end up harming us.” He let out a frustrated sigh. “Sorry. Just freaking out.”

Ava held him tighter.

Peter was right. If Savina had just told Ava about her mother, she wouldn’t have felt the need to speak to a Necromancer. Of course, no one expected her to be possessed. How could that have happened? The Cimmerians had to have known she was seeing the Necromancer. But with Trudy following her every step, she knew how it was possible.

And was that really her mother asking her to take Havok’s side? Why would she ask Savina to make sure Ava was safe if she promised her to Havok?

“Do you remember any of it?” Peter asked.

“Bits and pieces. I saw my mom in I guess a ghost-like form. She kept saying I needed to go to Havok.”

“I’m really sorry. I wish I knew what to say.”

Peter held her and she tried to relax. But she knew that wouldn’t happen for a very long time.

Ava rolled over onto her back. She couldn’t sleep and wanted to seek solace in the library but she was afraid to leave her room.              The Manor was quiet and she wondered if anyone was on watch in case the Cimmerians decided to attack. She wanted to check on Colden, but she wasn’t allowed near him.

Careful not to wake Peter, she quietly
pushed back the blankets and got out of the bed. She crept out of the room and downstairs to the library.

There was a low fire in the stone fireplace
and Ava moved closer to it, but stopped when she saw someone sitting in one of the chairs beside it. They faced the fire, and Ava didn’t want to face anyone. She turned on her heel to leave.

“Ava,” Gabriel called.

She silently cursed, but turned around and met his eyes. The firelight made his face look softer.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I just wanted to grab a book. I’ll leave you alone.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Why?”

“Because I enjoy your company. And given what happened, you look like you could use some.”

“Why are you being so nice to me? Don’t you hate me?”

“No, of course not. I’m upset that you didn’t adhere to my warning and that you lied to me. And worried all of us that night. But we all make mistakes. No one’s perfect.”

Ava walked closer. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I was just so desperate.”

“I know. I completely understand. I’ve been there before. You really worried us that night. It was like you completely disappeared. We had no idea where you went. We couldn’t even feel you.”

“
You couldn’t?”

“No. Not until Savina killed the spirits. It kinda felt like you were dead.”
He frowned.

“
I’m sorry I worried you.” She sank into the chair next to him and held her head in her hands. “I’ve betrayed everyone I love. I can’t believe I almost killed him.” The tears returned. She didn’t want to cry in front of Gabriel but she couldn’t control them. It was like they had a mind of their own.

She felt his hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t blame yourself.”

She looked up at him. “Are you serious? This was one hundred percent my fault. I was the stubborn one who wouldn’t stop. You even warned me.”

“Because of the pain you would endure by seeing your mother. I didn’t think the Cimmerians would use a Necromancer to get to you.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Necromancers never side with Enchanters or Cimmerians.”

“Well, maybe this one did.”

“I don’t know. It seems unlikely. What exactly happened?”

“All I remember is I saw my mom and I asked her a few questions and then she was gone. I woke up at the cabin, trapped inside my body. I couldn’t control it at all.
Then I came to the Manor.”

“Do you remember the thoughts the spirit inside you had?”

“Not really. Just that they needed to attack.” Ava forced herself to remember what the spirit thought. If they were to attack everyone at the Manor, why didn’t she try to kill Peter? She remembered as soon as the spirit saw Colden, she immediately attacked. Were the spirits trying to find Colden? Why would they want to kill him?

“What are you thinking?”

“What if the spirits wanted Colden dead?”

“Why would they want that?”

“Maybe not kill him, but weaken him to—. What if they were really after Savina? And were trying to get her away from the Manor so they could attack her?”

“Or to get her away from the Manor to attack us.”

The realization on his face matched her feeling. “Oh no. What have I done? They’re going to ambush them. Or us.”

He shook his head. “Something about that doesn’t make sense though. Didn’t the spirits use your power against him?”

“Yes.”

“Almost drowning someone wouldn’t weaken them as much as it did Colden.”

“He has been ill lately.”

“But you healed him.”

“Apparently I didn’t if all it took was that to make him so bad Savina couldn’t even heal him. Maybe I was to attack everyone at the Manor and he was the first one I saw.”

“You saw Peter first, though.”

“Have we deduced that the Cimmerians hijacked the Necromancer’s spirit calling?”

“No. Just speculating. Necromancers are insanely smart and powerful. He would have sensed Cimmerians and halted the whole thing.”

“But he didn’t. So maybe it was a spirit calling gone bad. Really bad. Perhaps there was another spirit that forced its way into the circle.”

“The spirits can’t leave the circle though. It’s a barrier. So either the Necromancer forced the spirit inside you or I don’t know.”

Ava sighed. “He could have been possessed.”

“The possessed spirit wouldn’t know how to operate a calling.”

“Well, whatever the reason, it’s my fault that he’s on his death bed. Maybe the spirits weren’t after him specifically but because he is somewhat of an Elder, it was enough to force Savina to go look for a cure.”

“Possibly.”

“How would we even know if the Elders got attacked? Or vice versa?”

“The Elders have very strong powers that link them together.
Kinda like our necklaces, but a much stronger connection. We have got to keep training and keep our eyes out.”

Ava nodded and for a few minutes, they were quiet, lost in their own thoughts.

“Thank you, Gabe. For being my friend. And for helping me.”

“You don’t have to thank me.”

“I just wish I knew why she did it.”

“Maybe she was faced with a decision and she thought he would never possess your soul because he would eventually die like Corbin did.”

“What kind of decision could that be? Why would she just assume he would be dead by the time I was old enough.”

“I don’t know. She could have been a spy.”

Ava hadn’t thought of that. “Do you know something that I don’t?”

“No. I’m just saying that it happens.”

“Is someone here a spy?”

“No, the Elders would know.”

“Didn’t you know my mother though?”

“I only met her briefly. I hadn’t always lived here.”

“Why have you all been here for so long?”

“We came to train you all. But we liked being around everyone.” He dropped his gaze and Ava wondered if there was
more he wasn’t telling her.

“Oh.
So, what if my mom had been a spy for the Cimmerians? Why go and marry an Ephemeral and have a child? Was it like what Veronica’s husband did?”

“I really don’t know. I wish I knew the answers.”

“It’s okay. I should stop obsessing over it.”

“It’s a part of who you are. Of course, you want to know. But don’t think for a second that what your mom chose for you
means you have to follow through. You make your own decisions and ultimately, you’ll know the right one.”

He was right. “I just wish I had listened to you.”

“I know, but we have all been desperate at some point in our lives and get consumed by that desperation.”

“I can be better. I don’t want to be a Cimmerian. But will Savina believe me?”

His eyebrows furrowed. “Of course she will. She believes in you.”

“What do you think they’ll do
to me?”

“
I really don’t know, Ava. Just know you still have friends who support you.”

“Thanks,” she said, even though she didn’t deserve his friendship or support.

They stayed up a few hours longer talking. Gabriel had really become a good friend and the thought of possibly losing him in the war made Ava panic. Losing any of her friends for that matter. And Peter. She couldn’t possibly live without Peter.