Uninhibited (Unlikely Lovers) (30 page)

“Crap.”

Kathy sighed. “The holidays are always a stressful time.” She patted Emily’s hand. “But we’ll get through them. We always do.”

Kathy’s logic was sound. However, Emily had survived all of those previous holidays without Alan, who was turning out to be the most exhausting boyfriend she’d ever had. She loved everything about him except for the fact that he seemed to be able to function on a lot less sleep than she could.

By lunchtime,
Emily had managed to wade through a boatload of statements but still hadn’t hit on an idea for Alan’s gift—until she heard her friend Becky giggling about buying presents at Samantha’s Sex and Such. Emily had driven past the place a million times, and though she’d never been inside, considering the lack of sex in her life up to that point, it was a wonder she wasn’t a regular customer.

Despite
Alan’s latex allergy and his aversion to bondage, she was sure to find something
for him there. A year’s supply of anal lube was the first thing that came to mind, however that was more the sort of thing
he
might get for
her
, rather than the other way around. There was certainly no need for her to buy any sexy lingerie to stimulate his interest. Maybe what she needed was something to stimulate
hers.

Hmm…

This was definitely not a search she could make from her desktop computer, but sitting in the lounge with her phone, she found just the thing.

And they’ve got them in stock. Oh, yeah…

One quick stop on the way home, and her Christmas shopping would be complete.  

Not surprisingly, Emily
processed an astonishing number of statements and was out of the office in record time.

* * * *

Considering the variety of soaps available at Farmer’s Foods, Alan should’ve been prepared for the vast array of soap-making supplies at the hobby store. Nevertheless, the myriad choices had him completely stymied. He stood there, staring at the molds, scents, and soap bases like a toddler trying to pick out parts for an alien spacecraft.

Start with what you know.

The Shea butter base was a given, but the scents? If there’d been an
Essence of Emily
, the choice would’ve been easy—especially if he’d only been trying to please himself. The question was, what would Emily like? He tried to remember the toiletries she’d had in her bathroom, but beyond that Shea butter soap, he couldn’t think of a thing.

Her hair.

He
loved
the smell of her hair. Picking up scents at random, he finally hit on one that had a similar aroma.
White tea and ginger.

Perfect.

He tossed that and several others he liked into the cart along with three instruction manuals and four different kinds of molds. Flipping through one of the books, he discovered a few other essentials she might need and threw them onto the pile. By the time he made it to the checkout lane, he had enough stuff to fill a stocking and three or four boxes, so he bought them, too. 

There.
No one could accuse him of skimping on Emily’s Christmas, and the presents weren’t even sex-related.

Unless you counted shower sex.

Damn. Better get her some chocolate.

Stopping at his favorite
candy store on the way back to the grocery, he bought a large box of assorted handmade dark chocolate truffles. No self-respecting chocolate lover could possibly resist
that.

What about a bottle of wine?

He could get that from his own store at a discount. Ha! This present thing wasn’t so hard after all. A guy just had to think with his brain instead of his dick.

Unfortunately, by the time he got back to work, his
dick had taken over again. Beyond telling Emily he was going to nail her as soon as he got to her place, he couldn’t recall that they’d made any plans for the evening. Not to mention the fact that he couldn’t go another second without hearing her voice. He’d fished his phone out of his pocket and was about to hit the speed dial when Travis came strolling through the door.

“Hey, Alan.
Got any fresh turkeys left?”

“A whole flock of them
flew in this morning,” Alan replied. “All sizes. Let me guess. You forgot to thaw out the gigantic frozen turkey you bought three weeks ago.”

“
Nope. Miranda wants to bake a fresh one this year. Said she’d never done it before, and I told her I was pretty sure you’d have them.”

Alan shrugged. “So do a lot of other places.”

“Yes, but yours are
organic
.”

“Didn’t know that
sort of thing meant all that much to you.”

“
It doesn’t. Miranda seemed to think it was a good idea, though.”

Something in the way Travis was acting didn’t seem quite right
. Alan narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Why are you
really
here? Checking up on me?”

“
No. Should I be?”

Travis blinked several times and sniffed twice.
Alan knew the signs. Either his cousin had caught a cold or he was lying.

Alan glanced at Shona, who quickly averted her eyes. “
Uh-huh. Shona called you. Didn’t she?”

Travis winced
. “She was pretty worried. You seem fine now, though.”

“Yeah. I’m okay. I kinda freaked out when I realized I hadn’t gotten Emily anything for Christmas.”

“From Shona’s description, it was a pretty serious panic attack.” Travis gave him another quick once-over. “Glad you’re feeling better. Hope you stay that way. You and Emily still planning to come to Mom and Dad’s on Christmas?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.
We’ll have to leave early, though. Emily’s family is getting together that evening.”

“
No problem. Just bring yourselves and a good appetite. Mom’s already started cooking.” Travis chuckled. “I’m kinda anxious to meet Emily. Imagine, a woman who can actually put up with
you
. It boggles the mind.”

“She doesn’t only put up with me,” Alan said smugly. “She loves me
—at least, I think that’s what she meant.”

“Yeah, well, maybe she hasn’t
been around you long enough to know the real you.”

“I
know it’s kinda sudden… How did you feel when you met Miranda? When did you know she was the one?”

Travis hesitated for a moment.
“It was more gradual with us. If I’d known she was single from the beginning, it might’ve been different, but— Oh, hell, who am I kidding? I probably fell for her on sight.”

“I think that’s what happened to me. Didn’t see her again for
a couple of weeks, but, yeah. I think I knew it even then. I’m still not sure how it’s supposed to feel. But it feels really good.” 

“I’m glad to hear it. Now, where are those turkeys?”

“I still can’t believe you actually decided to bake a fresh, organic turkey for Christmas. It’s so out of character for you.”

Travis
rolled his eyes. “You were right to begin with. We forgot to take that monster out of the freezer.”

* * * *

Emily was still at the sex toy shop when her phone rang. She didn’t even check the caller ID. “You must be pacing yourself. I’ve been expecting you to call all day.”

“Been
super busy,” Alan said. “Among other things. I just wanted to be sure we were still on for tonight.”

“Of course. Did you want to go out
for dinner?”

“Not really.”

Why am I not surprised?

A smile stole across her lips.
“Ah. So, we’ll be having a quiet evening at home, then.”

“Something like that. I can bring over some stuff f
rom the deli if you like.”

“Sounds great. You know, I never considered the advantages of dating a grocery store manager before. I may never have to go shopping again.”

“Oddly enough, you’re the first woman I’ve ever dated who appreciated that fact. We really
are
made for each other. Speaking of which, how’s your…um…problem?”

“Never better.”

“Good. Be ready for me, babe. That’s all I can say.”

How many times would she have given the fuckin’
moon to hear a man say that to her?

Too numerous to count.

“Don’t worry. I will be.” She heaved a sigh. “I love you, Alan. I really do.”

“Yeah, well, I’m beginning to think it’s mutual. You’ve got me doing things I’ve never done before.”

She glanced at the display of erotic jewelry
she’d been perusing and had to stifle a laugh. “Same here.”

For a few moments, all she heard was him breathing. “I can’t wait to see you again, Em.
You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.”

“I
might. I’ve missed you too.” Every second thought had been about him—the taste, smell, and feel of him. She was reminded of her frantic efforts to find him, which was an ordeal she hoped she’d never have to endure again. “I’m not home yet, myself. When can you be there?”

“Six thirty at the latest.”

She glanced at her watch.

Only one hour to go.

“I’ll be waiting.”

The question was
—
how
should she be waiting? Naked? Wearing a French maid costume? Thus far, Alan seemed to be something of a purist when it came to sex. He hadn’t doused her with perfume or chocolate syrup. Sure, she’d done the ice cream thing to him, but he hadn’t reciprocated, and he probably wouldn’t care what she had on as long as she was in the room.

Hmm… 

She gathered up her goodies and carried them up to the clerk, feeling slightly peculiar. She’d never bought anything like that before in her life. Alan was definitely broadening her horizons when it came to sex—and food. Oatmeal and stevia were only the beginning. The Thai cuisine was totally new, although she suspected he’d have her eating tofu burgers before long.

I’d do anything to keep him.

The idea hit her like a tsunami, sucking the breath from her lungs and the strength from her legs. The cashier, having undoubtedly seen more dramatic reactions, didn’t comment and might not have even noticed.

Sucking in a fortifying breath,
Emily locked her knees and reached for her purse.

“Yeah, I know. This stuff ain’t cheap,” the girl said.
Obviously she
had
noticed and had drawn her own conclusions.

“Hope it’s worth it.”

The clerk, who looked much too young to be working in such a place, nodded. “Yeah. Guys get really hard when you put those things on them. I guess they like the way it feels, or maybe it’s just the idea of having their junk decorated. We have some Christmas versions, too. Did you see those?”

Emily shook her head. “Must’ve missed them. Expensive?”

“Not really. The seasonal stuff is made a little cheaper. Probably just painted plastic, rather than actual gold or silver. They’re really cute, though.” She pointed to a display next to the greeting cards.

Emily figured she had nothing to lose by checking them out
and was pleasantly surprised. “Wish I’d seen these sooner.” Pasties that looked like Christmas ornaments. Cock straps complete with tiny Christmas trees and dangling bells. Thongs with big red bows in the front. They weren’t expensive, but at ten bucks a pop, the total would add up pretty quick. “Maybe just this one.” She tossed the cock strap on the counter.

“Aren’t you going to get something to wear yourself?”

“And get myself killed?” Emily chuckled. “Trust me, he’s a self starter.” Deriving a certain satisfaction from the girl’s expression, she added, “Don’t have anything that’ll decrease a guy’s sex drive, do you?”

“Uh, no. We don’t.
Never had anyone ask that, either.”

“First time for everything.” Emily couldn’t help feeling rather smug until she saw the total. “
H–how
much?”

“Two eighty-five ninety-nine.”

“
Putain de merde
,” she whispered. Doing her best to remain upright, she handed over her credit card.

Ho, ho, ho…

* * * *

In the end,
Emily opted to leave her clothes on and take her chances. If nothing else, having to undress her would slow him down. A little.

At precisely six twenty-eight, tires screech
ed in the driveway. A car door slammed and moments later Alan came flying through the front door without bothering to knock. Tossing aside the two sacks he was carrying, he grabbed her around the waist.

“
We’ve got to do something before we eat, Em. I’ve been a total basket case all day—never been so horny in my life.”

Which, given his history and tendencies,
she found rather difficult to believe.  “Prove it.”