Authors: MK Harkins
As soon as my feet hit the dew covered grass, I felt a sliding sensation. I couldn’t believe it, but it happened. I landed on my back, with papers strewn about the yard, books scattered in the garden, and
my shoes – I lost track of them. I looked up at the bus driver’s face. He looked shocked, impatient, and I think I might have seen some pity. The children on the bus were laughing. Of course they were laughing. I looked ridiculous. I got up, with what little pride I had left, and walked back to my house without picking up a thing.
My mom, who watched the entire spectacle, stood motionless. Our eyes connected, and I communicated in that moment there wouldn’t be a human on this earth who could make me get on that bus. She moved to the side as I walked past her into the house. Five minutes later, she made me pick up everything from the front yard, get them organized, then drove me to school. She was late for work, but I wasn’t going to win this one. Lesson learned.
Laurel was laughing so hard, tears were streaming down her face. “Oh, your mom, I love her!” she exclaimed.
I had to laugh along with her. It took eighteen years to see the humor in it, but I’ve shifted out of the humiliated part of the story and can now appreciate my mom.
I asked Laurel, “So, it’s your turn. What horrible things did your mom do to mortify and embarrass you?”
She looked down quietly and said, “I don’t have any stories.
She didn’t care enough.” She looked up, right into my eyes, and I knew. I knew why she was so guarded.
I asked, “Your dad?”
She shook her head. “Working, all the time. He named me after an aunt he admired. Otherwise, I’m sure he would’ve forgotten my name.”
I looked at her closely to see if she was serious. She was. I was in Washington, Laurel in California, and I wanted to hold her so badly, I ached. I wanted to show her that love didn’t have to hurt. I’d lived with a loving family all my life. My parents were a great example of what love should be. After I healed from my relationship with Mattie, I found the opposite of what I’d expected to happen. After my first heartbreak in college, I wanted nothing to do with relationships or love. After Mattie, once I truly healed, I decided that love and a relationship were exactly what I wanted. I knew how good it could be. I saw Mattie and Jeremy, how happy they were, and I decided I wanted that. I deserved that.
I looked back into Laurel’s tear-filled eyes and said, “I bet they’d change it if they could. People can be so, I don’t know, stupid?”
That made her laugh. She got serious again and said, “My mom
did try for a little while after my dad died. I think she knew how I felt because she felt exactly the same. Discarded. But it didn’t stop her once she had a chance to run off to Europe. I hear from her about twice a year, my birthday and Christmas.” She shrugged, trying to shake it off.
I said under my breath, “Idiot.”
Her head jerked up. “What did you say?”
I tried to look innocent. “Nothing, nothing at all.”
I didn’t want to insult her mom. She’s her last living relative. I suspected she heard what I said, because the most radiant, brightest smile crossed her face. I love her smile. I wanted to make her smile, now and always. The thought stopped my breath for a moment. I did want this. I wanted her.
That’s when I decided—I’m not giving up. Laurel and I are going to happen.
The big question, how am I going to get her?
∗∗∗
This will be our last night performing for a while, and I can tell the guys are giving it all they’ve got. I think the crowd senses it, and they’re all on their feet singing along to every song, even our original
ones. I’m going to miss performing for the next couple months, but I’m excited to record. Laurel has already warned me the days will be grueling, but I love a challenge.
Just as I’m about to tell the audience we’ll be taking a break, I see a familiar shade of strawberry blonde dashing toward me. No way! I haven’t seen Allix since the summer.
She jumps up on the stage, taking hold of me in a big hug. I’m having a hard time believing she’s here.
“What are you doing, sis? Why aren’t you in college studying like the good little student you are?” I’m teasing, of course. I hold her face in my hands, looking her over carefully to make sure she’s okay.
“I won this trip from a drawing! Can you believe it? I guess I entered it at the campus food court. They contacted me a few weeks ago with an all-expense paid trip to Seattle for the weekend. I’m staying at the Hilton until tomorrow. I knew this was your last weekend performing for a while, so I wanted to surprise you. It was meant to be. Talk about perfect timing!”
She’s so ecstatic, I don’t want to be the proverbial wet blanket, but I have to ask.
“It’s good timing to see us play, but Allix, don’t you have midterms
coming up?”
She swats my arm. “Don’t be such a big brother. I brought my books and assignments. This trip won’t interfere with my scholarship. Don’t you worry.” She pauses, “Actually, I’ll probably get more work done; the plane ride is so boring.” She grins at me again.
Allix could talk a drowning man out of his life vest.
I laugh and steer her off the stage. “I’ll meet you in the dressing room after the show.”
She nods and literally skips off the stage. I shake my head and return to the patiently waiting audience.
∗∗∗
“I told you. I saw Sophie and Laurel leaving a few minutes ago. I chased after them, but they were gone.” Scott is still sweating from his solo.
“Scott, if they were here, they wouldn’t have left. Why would they come all the way to Seattle just to turn around and leave? It doesn’t make sense. Let me call her.” I reach for my phone.
I think Scott was just hoping he’d seen Sophie, but there’s no way they’re in Seattle. “What’s with your fascination with Sophie anyway? I think it was wishful thinking.”
Scott shakes his head, convinced he’s right. “I tell you, Cade, it was Sophie. Legs like hers…” He pauses for a moment. “I could pick those legs out of a crowd of millions.”
I laugh. “You have it bad.”
“I do,” he responds.
Ayden approaches. “He has what bad?”
Scott and I look at each other. The unspoken competition for Sophie is about to be broken.
“I have it bad for Sophie.” He looks at Ayden with a challenge in his eyes.
Ayden replies, “Well, that’s a coincidence.” He turns and leaves the room.
“That went well,” I reply dryly. “Don’t you two dare start fighting right before we start recording. You two need to make a truce. This cannot get out of control. We’ve worked too hard, come too far to have it all fall apart. You understand?”
Scott’s face darkens. “And if this was Laurel we were talking about? How would you feel if someone else expressed an interest in her? Would you fight for her, everything else be damned?”
“Do you feel that strongly about Sophie? Are you willing to
risk the band for this attraction?” I ask.
Scott shrugs. “I don’t know yet. I’ll let you know when I figure it out.”
This doesn’t make me feel better. “Just don’t screw it up, Scott.”
“Tell that to Ayden. He has a new girl every night. He doesn’t want Sophie. He’s just interested in her because I am.”
I think about it for a moment. “Scott.”
“Yeah?”
“When’s the last time Ayden’s had one of his one-night stands – you know, what he’s done just about every night – before he met Sophie?”
We both look at each other. The truth sits like a hundred pound weight between us.
I answer for him. “It’s been a long time, Scott. So long, I don’t even remember the last time he was with someone.”
Scott grimaces. “Shit. Do you think he really has feelings for her?”.
“Maybe. Ayden doesn’t talk to me about stuff like you do.”
“Shit,” he says again and puts his head in his hands.
“I think you two are going to have to let her decide. Actually, didn’t you already tell me Laurel has guidelines or something about not mixing business with pleasure. Sophie probably has a clause in her contract.”
“Shit.”
“Scott, you’re getting repetitive.”
“I’ve been talking to her.” He looks guilty.
“How so?”
“We’ve been texting, a few emails, a little Skype.”
“Me, too. I mean, I’ve been doing the same with Laurel. So, do you think Ayden’s been doing the same?”
“Probably. You’re right, Cade. This could be a mess.”
Just as I’m about to agree with him, I feel arms around my neck.
“Hey, big brother, are you up for taking me out to dinner? And hey Scott, are you going to come with us?” Allix looks up at him, barely containing her hopeful expression. She’s had a crush on Scott since she was ten years old. I was hoping it would have worn off by now.
Luckily, Scott has always looked upon her as a little girl. She’s
grown up now, twenty-two, but Scott still sees her as a kid.
He messes up her hair and replies, “No, kid, I have other plans. You two have fun. Cade, make the call. I know I saw Laurel and Sophie.” He waves and leaves Allix staring at his back.
Her face falls as the disappointment sinks in. She takes a deep breath. “So, who are the girls he was talking about?”
“Laurel is our music agent. Sophie is her assistant. They’ve been working hard around the clock to get our music to the masses.” I grin at her.
“Why did Scott seem so interested in them?”
“I take it you haven’t met anyone interesting at college? That childhood crush still hanging with you, huh?” I tease.
Allix stops suddenly. “Am I that transparent? Oh no! Do you think Scott has figured it out?”
“I can guarantee you, Scott’s clueless, and I want it to stay that way. You know I don’t want you dating him. We’ve had this talk before.” The thought of it brings a shiver up my spine. I know way too much about Scott and his escapades. I don’t want him going near my little sister. Luckily, he thinks of her as a little sister, as well.
“I know. I’m trying. He’s just so funny, and talented. Oh, and
handsome.”
“Now I know love is blind.” I tap her on the arm.
“So, are you dating anyone? It’s been a long time since Mattie you know.”
“Yes. Well, no, not exactly. I hope to. I’ve met someone, but she’s not interested.”
Her face lights up. “That’s funny. Tell me another joke. A woman not interested in you? Spill it, brother. I want all the details.”
“No joke, Allix. She’s been giving me the cold shoulder for almost a year. Actually, if you count the first time I met her, it’s been even longer. I can tell you everything, but it’s going to take a while. It’s complicated.”
“Did you forget already? I’m a master at complications,” she replies.
Chapter 19
Laurel
“It’s Cade again. He must have seen us at the nightclub last night.” I show Sophie my phone. “Should I answer it?”
“Of course. He’ll just keep calling. Just act like nothing happened. Don’t let him know you saw him with his new girlfriend. Let’s see if the jerk comes clean on his own.”
I nod. “Hello,” I answer sweetly.
“Laurel! Are you in Seattle? Scott said he saw you and Sophie last night at the club?”
“Yes, we came by briefly. We had some other business to tend to, so we left.”
“Oh.” He sounds disappointed. “Why didn’t you come over and say hi?”
“You know, you guys were busy, and we had other things to do…” I’m trying to make my voice sound normal. The longer we talk, the harder it becomes.
“Is everything okay? You don’t sound like yourself.”
Damn. Cade’s always been so perceptive. “Everything is just great.”
I hear him sigh on the other end. “I need to see you today. I have something I need to talk to you about.”
Here it comes. “The Talk.” I roll my eyes. I don’t plan to make this easy on him.
He asks, “Can I pick you up? Around two this afternoon?”
“Sure, I’ll meet you in the lobby of my hotel. Do you remember the east side of the fountain? I’ll be at the bench by the big potted plant.”
“Yes, I remember. I’ll see you in about an hour. And Laurel?”
“Yes, Cade?”
“I’m really looking forward to seeing you.”
He’s taking this “friends” thing too far. I should have expected and planned for this. Instead, I’ve spent over a year in a fantasy. A dream or small hope we’d work out. The crazy chemistry we have, had, was like nothing I’d ever experienced before, and I let it carry me away. When I get back to LA, I’m going to call Douglas. I was right all along. I need someone who won’t let me down. I need someone safe.
If that’s true, why are tears streaming down my face? I don’t want Douglas. I want Cade. I also realize I wanted parents who would be there for me, and I didn’t get that either. So why should I expect Cade to be any different? No. I’m not going to feel sorry for myself. Cade moved on. I didn’t give him enough to keep him interested. I was so busy managing the band, I lost him. A sob escapes me as I realize the truth.
My mind drifts back to all our long distance talks. If I’m truthful with myself, I’m physically attracted to Cade in a big way. But it’s more than that. It’s been through our conversations in the last seven months that I’ve really felt myself fall for him. It was through the sharing of little things – the hopes, dreams and experiences that make up the fiber of who we are. I wipe the tears from my eyes. I have an hour to pull myself together and put on the performance of my life.
Cade
I was going to tell Laurel everything today, but I sense she’s not ready. For some reason, she has that “don’t get too close” vibe going on. I wonder to myself,
What happened
?
“So are things going all right? You seem quiet today.”
“Yep.”
This is not good. A one word answer - she seems mad. “Did I do something wrong?”
“Nope.”
“Laurel, come on. Out with it. What are you upset about?”
“Why would I be upset? I can’t think of a reason in the world I’d be upset over anything, anything at all. Can you?”
She’s going all cryptic on me.
“No, I can’t. I’m excited to see you. I’m glad you’re in town.”
“Are you now? Where are we going anyway?”