Unmask (Adrenaline Series (Stand Alone) Book 4) (22 page)

Without further discussion he turns and heads out of the room. As soon as the door shuts so do my eyes.

I don't wanna be in WITSEC. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad to get a fresh start? A new identity? But can I do that?

“How do you feel?” A voice I know lifts my eyes up.

“A little worn out, but I'll be fine. I drugged myself, so I knew the consequences.”

“That takes balls,” Knoxie quickly insists, folding her arms across her chest.

Madden, which I know because he's the only one who doesn't look like the triplets snaps, “Knox.”

“What?” She gives him a harsh glare. “The rest of you can barely bandage your knuckles without crying like a bitch.”

Her attitude causes me to giggle a little, which prevents me from getting swept away in how gorgeous she is.

Bikini model body with a biker mouth? How does anyone compete with that?

The two remaining McCoy triplets are at the foot of my bed with their arms folded across their chests.

It's insane how identical they look side by side. Same clothing. Same expressions. The differences are so subtle that if I hadn't spent almost two weeks staring into a specific pair of eyes, I wouldn't know the difference in the one who died.

Trying to ease some of the tension in my body I shift. “You three really look...just...like photocopied versions of one another.”

In unison they ask, “Can you tell us apart?”

My eyes oscillate back and forth, but I say nothing.

“You love one of us,” the one on the left comments.

“Or so you say,” the one on the right adds.

“Which one is which?” Their questioning in tandem makes me tense.

Nothing like being accused of not knowing the only person you love more than yourself.

I point to the one on the left. “Come here, please.”

Neither make an expression to give me a hint if I'm right or not. Instead he strolls over and leans for me to speak in his ear. After a few quick words, I place my hand on his face, and he nods. I then motion for the other to come over. When he arrives on the other side of me, he leans forward just as the one to the left had.

The moment he's close enough I slap him across the face.

You're damn right I did!

“Ou!” He screeches.

“How fucking dare you imply I don't know the man I love when I see him,” I sharply snap. His mouth bobs, but I don't let him speak. “I risked my life for you! I was ready to die Drew McCoy so you could live! You told me to trust you when you couldn't even trust that I would know who you were!”

“I knew I liked her,” Knox whispers.

“You didn't trust me!” Drew shouts back. “If you trusted me you would've believed me when I said I would come back for you!”

“I did!”

“Then why'd you try to kill yourself!”

“I didn't!” The shrieking continues. “I took enough to knock myself unconscious. I knew you and your brothers had some sort of plan. You would need more time than The Devil was going to allow. I gave myself enough to make sure I would stay passed out until you could get me somewhere safe. It also allowed for worst case scenario, which was him killing you before you stepped back on the property, to have my fail safe in place.”

“I don't even know what that means,” Drew sighs.

“It means, had you not gotten me to a hospital, had I still been stuck with The Devil, and he chose not to put a bullet in my brain, phase 2 of the mixture I took would've set in. It was a two phase drug. First phase unconsciousness. Checking my vitals at a hospital they would've spotted my system needed to be flushed ridding my body of the second drug which would have killed me once the first one wore off.”

“Basically she made it so if you didn't save her, she didn't have to live without you,” Knox explains.

That's what I said isn't it?

Drew slips his hand with mine and presses his forehead against mine. “Oh Mel...”

Tears start to sting the sides of my eyes. In a whimper, I cry, “I'm sorry, Drew. I'm sorry about Daniel.”

Hearing his brother's name causes his own tears to tumble from him. He doesn't say anything as he wraps himself around me. I hold him tightly to my body, eyes shut. The entire room is filled with so much strain it's suffocating.

After a moment he pulls away and I shake my head. “It's all my fault. If you hadn't come back for me-”

“No,” Drew stops me. Wiping away his tears with the back of his hand he shakes his head. “Don't.”

“But-”

“You didn't shoot him in the lung,” Drew states. The information raises my eyebrows. “And you didn't dive in front of a bullet to save me.” My hand catches my gasp. With a trembling voice he says, “I tried to save him. I drove as fast as I could.” His eyes lift to his brothers. “I did. I held his hand when he told me to....” Tears congregate once more. “That was it. When Daniel made me reach for his hand, I knew it was too late...” Finally he looks back down at me. “He was...DOA.”

“You should've never come back for me,” I whisper my guilt.

“If you wouldn't have been there to save them, they'd both be dead,” Madden's declaration turns my face.

“They had the antidote already,” I argue.

“We did,” Drew agrees. “But The Devil was expecting us to walk through the front door, which without you alive, we would have. We would've walked into our own massacre. Omar gave us a fighting chance because of
you
. He wanted you saved as much as I did.”

Omar...Geez, what's The Devil going to do if he finds out Omar helped them? Pray for him please. Pray that The Commissioner finds The Devil before he can do anything to the only other man who risked his life to save mine.

A hush falls across the room. It's at that moment I look up and around at the faces that are stained with tears. Destin and Drew who in pain look remarkably different. Destin's face looks soft, sweet, and in desperation of saving. Drew's looks hardened, hurt, and trying to explode into an uncontrollable rage. It's similar to the grim one on Madden's face. Knoxie looks beautiful even as tears fall from her eyes silently. The sight of these people who've just lost a family member I couldn't help save hurts my own heart to the point my chest starts to constrict.

I didn't deserve to live. He did. Yet here I am. I can't undo that. I can't replace my life for his. I swear, if I could, I would. What can I do? Well...yeah...I guess I can do that. I can take care of Drew the best I can. I swear to you and Daniel both, I'll do everything I can to keep him alive and them from losing one more McCoy.

Drew

Leaning against my bike, which part of me now loathes, I stare off into the cloudy distance.

“I'm so fucking tired of going to the graveyard,” Destin mutters from beside me.

“We all are,” I reply softly, eyes still focused ahead. “We all fucking are, bro.”

He sniffles and sighs, “I don't think I can do this, Drew. I can't put Middle Man in the ground.”

My face finally falls.

I have to bury another brother today. I have to fucking say goodbye again. No one told him to dive in front of that fucking bullet for me. He should be standing here mourning me. He should be here against this bike, cursing my name and smoking a cigarette. You know what that bastard said when I asked him why he did that? You know what he fucking said? That he owed me. That he owed me for saving his ass his entire life. That it was about time he could save mine. If that shit wasn't fucking enough, he had the fucking nerve to say he owed Mel one for saving his life long enough to see his brothers one final time. Fuck him for that. Fuck him for all of that! He's a smartass asshole! No, I can't stop crying. You stop crying. Fuck. And no, I didn't tell my brothers he said that, just Mel. She deserved to know. She cried harder when I did. Apparently survivor's guilt is real shit.

“I can't...”

Turning my voice to him, but keeping my face down I state, “We don't have a choice.” The back of my hand rubs my nose before I lift my eyes back to his. “We bury our brother. We send him off with love then we don't stop until we make sure The Devil gets acquainted with the same six feet he made Daniel and Merrick meet.”

Destin nods and shoves his hands in his pockets.

That's a fucking promise if I've ever made one.

“Hey,” Mel's soft voice joins us. “I'm...ready.”

My eyes glance over the black form fitting dress Knox let her borrow. The sight of all of her curves on display makes my dick twitch in my jeans.

Of all the fucking times...

She leans up and plants a soft kiss on my cheek. In a whisper she says, “Knoxie warned me you would react that way.”

A small smile twitches on my face. “You ready for your first ride?”

Her eyes widen.

Yeah, can you believe it? Been home about a week and haven't taken my bike out yet. Partially because we've barely left the apartment other than to meet with The Commissioner, who is charging The Devil with kidnapping me and Daniel's murder among other things, and partially because I didn't have the heart too.

I hand her a helmet before I crawl on my bike and start it almost in unison with Destin. Once we're both settled, I offer her a hand to hop on, insisting, “Hold on tight.”

Destin pulls out first, with me tightly behind. Melody immediately wraps herself tighter around me. Increasing the speed, I find the freedom in flying down the road I once used to. As we agreed before we started the journey to Aunt Kelli's, we take the long route, giving our own silent solute to Daniel. On curves we rev up to speeds that would easily scare anyone, but are ones we both know are where we are most comfortable. While on straight-aways we lean a little harsher to each side than necessary.              

We arrive in front of our Aunt Kelli's home in the middle of nowhere.

Growing up, after our mom died we lived with Aunt Kelli and Uncle D for a while. Uncle D taught me how to ride my first motorcycle. It was his lifestyle. Dad was for cars, but us, all three of us triplets, had a calling for motorcycles.

I hang my helmet on one of the bars while Mel places hers on the seat. As soon as her head is free she tosses her long hair around.

She refuses to keep it braided like she used to. Says that part of her is dead. She wanted to cut it, but I vetoed that shit. I wanna keep pulling it during sex. There's something about wrapping my hand around it while I tug her towards me, I can't get enough of.

“Scared?”

“With you?” Mel smirks. “Never...”

I offer her my hand. Once she takes it, I lead her away from Aunt Kelli's house towards the McCoy junk yard. Strolling behind Destin, I drop her hand and wrap my arm around her shoulder. Melody looks around at the junk yard that used to belong to Uncle D that Madden's now responsible for.

Dad had the mechanic shop. Uncle D had this place. They always had a way of completing each other the way brothers should. The way the three of us always did.

Behind the junkyard is where the McCoy cemetery is. Under a large shaded area created by two trees there are two rows of tombstones. Dad and Uncle D's are beside each other's, while Ben's is behind his fathers and my mother as well as Merrick is behind my dad's.

That's where we're about to put Daniel.

As if hearing my thoughts, Mel slips her arm around me, pulling me in tightly. I welcome the support as we come to a stop between Madden and Destin. On the other side of him is Vinnie with his two girlfriends Shelby and Krissy. Next to them is where my Aunt Kelli is, Knox holding her up for support.

She's helped bury the most McCoys out of all of us. How any person doesn't just throw in the towel after burying not only your husband but your only son is beyond me. Sometimes I wonder how Aunt Kelli stays as strong as she has for all these years. I swear...she's gonna crack at any minute.

Madden who has the shovel in one hand and Daniel's ashes in an old oil can in the other, doesn't even look up as he hands it to me. Instead he keeps his eyes pasted on the hole we have to put Middle Man in.

Fuck...I don't know how I'm supposed to do this.

Knowing I have to speak first I open my mouth to try. Not a sound comes out. I'm not even sure I'm still breathing on my own. With the steadiest clutch I can maintain, I stare at the can containing the remains of my brother.

Destin's not alone. He's not the only one who can't fucking do this. This is all that remains of a part of me. One third of me. How the fuck am I supposed to keep functioning? How the fuck am I supposed to go on without him? How the fuck am I supposed to say anything?

Suddenly Mel's hand covers mine on the can. The simple gesture blankets me with enough momentary comfort to speak. “You know, you were a pain in the ass Middle Man. You always had to be the first to do something. Always figured it was your way of making up for not being able to be born first. You were so impatient to do everything first you were only born thirty seconds after me. Barely gave mom time to stop pushing.” A small pause comes before I finish. “And now you're first of us three to leave. Of all the things I wished you weren't in a hurry to do, this was definitely it. Um...hug the rest of the McCoys for me and I promise to keep watch over these down here if you keep watch over the ones up there....”

I give the can two taps and nod at Mel. As if she's practiced, she instantly says, “I'm sorry Daniel for everything. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you and your brother. You enjoy the real Eden.”

She prepares to pass the can without tapping, so I stop her. “McCoy tradition. One tap on the car door carrying the new born for safe passage into this world and two taps on the casket for safe passage out.”

One of my grandfathers started it and we've kept it alive ever since. Don't worry. You can tap the can too.

With new tears, Mel taps the can twice and passes it to Destin.

Death changes peoples. I fucking know that. What I'm afraid of is the change it's making to him. You know Madden is as cold as he always is. Knox is following in his footsteps insisting to be the rock of this family while I'm keeping my head a float thanks to Mel. Anytime she senses I'm drowning in my own thoughts, she lets me drown in her body instead. Whisks me away to focus on the aspects of life that are worth living for. We're each other's antidotes now. No masks for us to hide under. It's amazing. But I'm still worried as fuck. Destin's not the same brother I left. I don't even see traces of him. Honestly? I'm scared that I might lose him next. Don't fucking let me.

“You taught me my first bike trick. Taught me the technique to getting Drew to take the fall and the secret to pissing Madden off. You were always the teacher because like Drew said, you wanted to do everything first. Just don't be the first one to get kicked out of Heaven...I'm sure Dad and the others will keep you in check. Look out for us down here. We fucking need it.”

We fucking do.

Destin gives a double tap and passes it to Krissy. She sniffles, “I'll miss your stunt videos almost as much as your cocky smile.”

She hits it twice and passes it to Vinnie.

Vinnie, Krissy, and Shelby are extended family. Vinnie was closest to Merrick, but he's always helped the rest of us when we needed it. He coordinates street races, helps move drugs sometimes, and launders money. He's kind of a jack of all trades. Daniel used him most when he wanted to get paid for doing his bike tricks or when he wanted to race for high cash.

“I'll make sure to run the circuit one more time. Just for you McCoy.”

He double taps and hands it to Shelby. “Pool parties won't be the same without you. We will have one more toast for you McCoy. And you have one up there for us.”

Her words cause the air in my lungs to seep out. My body starts to sway, but Mel instantly holds me closer.

Aunt Kelli takes the can. Her tears hit the top and the air that just returned to my body is choked out again. “You were always up for trouble Daniel. Rest now...”

She pats it twice and hands it to Knox. With a small sob she says, “Goddamn you McCoys. When I get up there I'm kicking your ass for making me spend so much money in waterproof mascara.” A small smiles comes to her somber face. “I'll make sure Triple D doesn't fall apart without you.”

Two taps and she passes it to Madden who clutches it so tight I'm afraid he's going to crush the can. In a very quiet voice he states, “I'll see you sooner than you think.”

What the fuck do you think he means by that?

He gives the can the farewell taps and places it in the hole. Effortlessly he tosses dirt in the grave. Unable to watch the sight, I turn my head, close my eyes, and rest it against Mel's. Holding me tightly in silence, I try to settle my spinning thoughts knowing the goodbye isn't over yet.

There's a slight bump of my shoulder which opens my eyes. Destin makes a head motion to start that way. Turning to follow him back the way we came, my ears zone in on the only two people speaking.

Madden pleads, “Aunt Kelli-”

“Don't,” she harshly whispers. “You let another McCoy
die
. I hope you're right. I hope you're next.” In disbelief she said that, I glance over my shoulder. “At least then, the others might have a real chance at surviving.”

For the first time I can remember, Madden's jaw trembles as his steps falter. Thankfully Knox swoops in beside him, putting an arm around him, even though he tries to shrug her away. I turn back around and press my lips together.

She was out of fucking line for that, right? It's not his fault Middle Man is dead or any of them for that matter. It's The Devil's fault my brothers are in the ground. He's gonna more than pay. The streets will run with his blood. Guaranteed.

In the front of the house, I kiss Mel on the cheek. She sighs, “Be safe.”