Unmasked (Revealed #1) (17 page)

The small smile that played on his lips as he set about gently washing me was worth all of my previous embarrassment because his dimple was back, his face looking relaxed, happy, and utterly content.

This almost obsessively caring behaviour was a million miles away from the Sean who had fucked me over a kitchen counter and buggered off into the night. Not that I was complaining – this upgrade was far more preferable.

Watching the top of his dark head as it tilted with each careful swipe, I couldn’t help but smile. This man was a complete mystery, but getting to know him was proving to be rather good fun.

As I waited for him to finish his silent task, my mind rewound his words again. As much as I knew I shouldn’t, it was nearly impossible not to read too much into his apparently heartfelt declarations of regret. Saying he wanted to take care of me was probably no more than Sean’s way of apologising for being a bit of a shit after our last two encounters – wasn’t it?

Once the washcloth had been meticulously smoothed all around my sensitive flesh and upper thighs, Sean finished by sliding his forearm under my hips, lifting my back a few inches from the bed, and wiping the flannel right down the crack of my bum. Yelping in surprise, I squirmed in his arms, almost unable to believe what he had just done. Back there was somewhere that no man had ever been before, and his contact made me buck embarrassingly and clutch at his wrist as he tried to repeat the action.

‘Like that, do you?’ he murmured darkly, before smirking at me, winking wickedly at my astonished expression, and then thankfully tossing the cloth onto the floor before he could continue with a more detailed exploration of my nether regions. Blimey, that had been a bit unexpected. And as to whether I had liked it or not? Well, I wasn’t really sure – it had been a surprise, yes, but hadn’t been unpleasant, so I wasn’t really sure what to make of it.

Thankfully, Sean didn’t actually wait for me to answer his embarrassing question and instead set about pulling the covers up around us. Tugging me into his arms, he gently arranged my body so that I was spooned against his big frame, with my back to his front and one of his arms wrapped around my waist, before he let out a contented sigh into the hair by my nape.

We snuggled for some time like this, and at first it was bliss. Against my will, I was developing some serious feelings for this man, and right now, this was exactly where I wanted to be. But the more time that passed, the more I began to worry about what would happen next. Sean was a serial seducer and had already proven that he could be perfectly heartless, distant, and cold when he wanted, so I needed to cut this short now and get away. It had been fun – more than fun – but I was well aware of the fact that I was starting to quite like my position in Sean’s arms, which definitely was not a good thing for the long-term health of my falling heart.

Even though it was only early afternoon, I was starting to feel sleepy from our antics and felt a ball of nerves settle in my belly. Sean seemed happy – in fact, from the heavy breathing on my neck he might actually be asleep. But would he wake up soon, decide that his apology was done and kick me out?

Just the thought of his emotionless dismissals made me shudder and feel cold despite the heat of his arms. I couldn’t, and wouldn’t, let that happen again. Thinking that perhaps enough was enough, I made the decision to move back to my own room in the hope that it would avoid any awkwardness later.

From his low, steady breaths it seemed like Sean definitely was asleep, so I carefully started to slide out from under his arm, hoping I could get away without disturbing him. But before I had even got a few inches away from his solid chest, his arm tightened around me and yanked me backwards so I was firmly encased within his warm embrace again.

‘Where do you think you’re going?’ he growled, his voice sleepy, rough, and sexy as sin.

In a flash of moving sheets and hot, hard skin I suddenly found myself gently pinned below Sean, his thighs straddling mine, his arms effectively trapping me below him, and the weight of his semi-hard cock resting heavily on my belly.

As I looked up into two alert blue pools, I felt my cheeks flush guiltily. Oops. I had been caught in the act of fleeing, and Sean certainly didn’t look as sleepy as he had sounded.

‘Um … don’t you want me to leave?’ I asked curiously, trying to hide the excitement at the thought that he might want me to stay with him. It felt so good being held in his arms. Probably too good, but perhaps I could escape reality for just a while longer and stay with him for a short time more. It would sure beat going back to my freezing cold bed sheets for a post-sex snooze, that was for sure.

He stared at me intently for a few seconds, his face annoyingly unreadable, before his lips twitched into just a tiniest hint of a smile.

‘No. Stay,’ he murmured, looking down at me quizzically, as if he were also trying to work out what his answer meant. ‘I … I like having you in my arms,’ He said, simultaneously causing my heart to soar and my poor confused brain to become even more tangled as I tried to understand the inner workings of this man.

Hesitantly nodding my acceptance, I watched as Sean smiled happily and dropped a peck onto the tip of my nose. Once again, he settled the two of us in his bed, this time with him on his back and me laid across his chest.

‘I need to catch up on the sleep I missed last night. No more trying to leave, OK?’ he murmured, confusing me even more. Rather than start a Q&A session about what the heck he was thinking and feeling, I just gave in to another of his demands and nodded my head. ‘You better be here when I wake up,’ he muttered, shortly before his arm around me tightened and I heard a low snore escape his throat.

There was no way I could sleep now. This was all far too confusing to let me relax that much. Not to mention possessive – his words almost sounded like he was talking about long-term plans, but there was no way I could indulge my heart in fantastical wonderings like that. My poor brain could barely keep up with what was going on as it was, and I lay there for quite a while breaking down all possible reasons, options, and outcomes.

Depressingly, most of the scenarios I came up with ended with me experiencing some mind-blowing sex for a few days, falling head over heels for Sean, and then leaving here with a broken heart when the snow had cleared and he’d had his fill of me. Men could be shallow like that, sex really could be ‘just sex’ for them, whereas women might claim that was the deal, but often viewed it from a far more emotional perspective.

At least, that was the case for me. It was one of the reasons I’d avoided one-night stands and ‘fuck buddies’. I’d learnt this lesson the hard way when at nineteen, I’d had a brief fling with an intense, charming, and slightly older man, swiftly falling head over heels and then being discarded when he realised I wanted more than just sex. That had been an eye opener for me and left me an emotional wreck for months afterward.

Pursing my lips now, I scowled as I thought about it. It wasn’t a million miles away from what was happening here; Sean was also older, certainly intense and charming when he chose to be, and no doubt I would take months to recover from this encounter. Damn. After years of being sensible and selecting boyfriends with care, I had subconsciously allowed myself to slip right back onto the same path.

Despite my earlier belief that I wouldn’t be able to sleep, gradually sleepiness softened my gloomy thoughts and eventually pulled me into a relaxing peace.

The two of us must have snoozed for quite some time, because when I woke up the room was darkening as afternoon turned to evening. I was still sprawled across Sean’s chest; my head was over his heart, one hand was laying on the soft hair of his stomach, and my leg had somehow shifted in my sleep so it was now flung over his thigh.

As my mind became more alert my earlier panic returned, and I began to worry that our snooze had merely delayed the inevitable awkwardness that would fall between us, but before anxiety could fully settle in I re-evaluated my positioning and smiled. As well as being pretty forward with my feelings as I practically blanketed him with my body, he too was showing no signs of wanting me gone from his bed – one of his arms was cradling me against him, his hand gripping my hip just as tightly as before, as if he truly had meant his earlier statement about me not leaving him as he slept. As well as his firm hold on me, Sean’s free hand was trailing gently through the long stands of my hair, following it from scalp to tip over and over again – and that wasn’t something a lover would do if they wanted you out pronto, was it?

I hummed contentedly and snuggled closer. I loved having my hair touched, it always made me feel warm and sleepy and I couldn’t help but angle my head closer to increase his contact. ‘Your hair is incredible,’ he murmured gruffly, his voice rough from sleep and sending a shiver of lust straight through me.

His hand finally released its tight hold of my hip, almost like he was now satisfied that I wasn’t running away, and joined his other hand in smoothing over my hair from the scalp to the ends. ‘Sleep well?’ he enquired, and I was fairly sure from his tone that there was a smile on his lips.

Well, this was certainly a more pleasant wake-up call than I’d expected. I couldn’t help but smile to myself as I shifted my body to look up at him. He was indeed smiling, and what a knockout smile it was; Sean’s dimple was well and truly in place, his face looked relaxed and happy, and the floppy mess of his hair as it fell over his forehead was so endearing that I couldn’t help my own smile widening into a broad grin.

I knew I shouldn’t get carried away, but this cosy, affectionate wake-up was prompting me to develop a new sense of hope in this crazy situation. Perhaps he wasn’t going to chuck me out after all.

‘I did. You must have worn me out,’ I joked quietly. Sean smiled along with me, lifting a hand and gently rubbing a thumb across my cheek before his eyes suddenly darkened and he began pursing his lips.

My whole body stiffened above him, I’d already worked out that this lip pursing gesture was some sort of sign that he was uptight or worried about something, but if that wasn’t a clear enough indicator of his sudden mood change, then the tenseness of Sean’s body accompanied by his flicking, agitated gaze was a dead giveaway.

Had I scared him off by being too affectionate? Perhaps I was giving away the fact that I was falling for him? Assuming that I was the cause of his sudden unease I tried to sit up, only to have Sean pull me closer to him, tucking my head into the nook of his neck and holding me so tightly it was like he was terrified that I was going to disappear.

OK, I was certainly confused now. He hadn’t asked me to leave, though, and was clinging on to me for dear life, so I had very little choice but to relax against him.

As he felt my body go lax in his arms, Sean let out a sigh so long and deep that I couldn’t decide if it was relieved or pained. ‘I need to keep you close,’ he muttered. A frown flitted to my brows. I didn’t understand what he meant, but now didn’t seem an appropriate time to ask for clarification, so I stayed silent and went along with it. After all, being in his arms felt pretty fantastic, regardless of what random statements he might be making.

Snuggling into him, I gently rubbed at his chest with my fingertips, hoping to reassure him even though I didn’t know the issue. ‘Those articles you read earlier. I want to talk about them.’

Ah. So that was what was bothering him. Was this the moment he confessed that he only had sex with women a few times and then left? Was I about to be turned out after all? My stomach did several somersaults, but I tried to remain calm and let him do the talking for now. Running away could come later if it needed to.

‘The day that Elena went snorkelling and had her accident …’ he began, his voice wobbling slightly. My eyebrows rose in surprise at the topic, because I’d assumed he wanted to talk about the string of broken hearts he had created, not the accident with his ex. From his tone and the slight trembling I could feel in his arms it was clear he was upset, and I frowned in concern, but chose to stay silent and let him continue.

‘I … I told her I was tired and didn’t want to go snorkelling because I had a hangover, but really, I was sleeping with another woman,’ he confessed suddenly, his words coming out in a rush.

My eyes practically popped from my skull. OK, so we could officially add ‘cheater’ to the ever growing list of ‘player’ and ‘heartbreaker’ for Sean’s character description. My stomach dropped, and I suddenly felt quite sick. The accompanying pain in my heart at this news also told me that I was already in over my head with this man, but seeing as I was naked, in his bed, and in his arms while he went on some strange confessional, there really wasn’t much I could do about it at the present moment. So he’d been with another woman when his girlfriend was killed – no wonder he still felt guilty.

‘I feel awful, still to this day I blame myself for her death. If I’d been there I would never have let her go near the propeller, but instead I was balls deep and screwing some waitress.’

Gulping down my shock at his blunt honesty, I swallowed the huge lump that had formed in my throat and hesitated, completely unsure as to what to say or do. As irrational and insensitive as it was, I initially felt a pang of jealousy, but had to forcefully push that aside and consider how to respond. His girlfriend had died, for goodness’ sake, I needed to get a grip on my emotions, not turn into some nutty green-eyed monster over some waitress.

It turned out I didn’t have to say anything, because after drawing in a long breath, Sean continued, his voice low and rough. ‘Elena and I had met on a film shoot and both being single we had ended up fooling around a bit – we weren’t ever officially dating, even though the press declared us as an item, but we were filming together for months and hooked up every now and then. I suppose it was kind of a friends with benefits set up.’

Reaching up, he ran a hand through his hair in apparent agitation, scratching so hard at his scalp that I heard his nails dragging through the skin and winced before reaching over and taking his hand in mine, pulling it away from damaging himself further and interlocking our fingers. I don’t know what prompted me to do it, but Sean paused, staring in apparent wonder at our joined hands for an age before licking his lips, looking briefly at me, and continuing.