Authors: Paulette Miller
Tianna really didn’t know what to say. “I’m not sure. Since leaving Willow, I’ve had urges I can’t explain, except I seem to be arguing with several inner voices. It’s hard to keep it straight in my mind. My inner voices don’t always agree.”
He nodded as if understanding. “I know that one. My inner dragon and I don’t always agree either. You need to tell the others about what you’re feeling. I did some stupid things when my inner dragon first started to stir. Actually, I’m still doing stupid things. We all need to be prepared for the unexpected.”
Tianna nodded.
Soon Tianna and Seth rejoined the rest of their camp mates. With a little prodding from Seth, Tianna explained what she was starting to feel.
Marcus thanked her for sharing the information by reiterating, “You must keep us informed as you feel more inner dragons stirring. This can be a dangerous time for all of us.”
They spent the next few hours sharing funny and scary stories of when they first started to shift. Tianna decided that she was glad she wasn’t around Gabriel when he was Seth’s age. An uncontrollable shifted warrior dragon wasn’t something she was anxious to see.
Before going to bed, Tianna pulled out her wizard book and proudly added several additional notes about the village of Willow and the Inari culture. She also added a rather large entry in her journal about her kiss with Nathaniel.
Over the next few days, Nathaniel seemed uncharacteristically quiet. Tianna often caught him staring at her deep in thought. Several times he had approached her like he wanted to talk but, at the last second, he found something else to do. He even stopped teasing her. Although she wanted to jump into his arms, she held back. She worried that it was her teasing him that may have caused his change in attitude toward her. Maybe all of his actions were just pretend and, now that he knew she did have real feelings for him, the challenge was over. She feared that he regretted his actions and was afraid to tell her he wasn’t really interested. A sense of disappointment and doubt quickly grew within her.
Their group was going to travel close to a human village, and Marcus decided to stop to pick up some supplies. Tianna thought it was best if she stayed back at the camp and no one argued. They didn’t want her to go through what she went through at the last human village. They wouldn’t allow her to stay alone so someone had to stay behind. To her surprise, Nathaniel was the one that insisted he remain as her guard. She expected him to go into town and find companionship. She feared what was coming.
After everyone had left for the village, Nathaniel approached Tianna. “Would you like to join me for a walk? I thought we could look for some of the ingredients the Inari taught us about.”
Tianna smiled enthusiastically. “That’s a wonderful idea. I’m almost out of several herbs and other molds and fungus.” As they started to walk out of the camp, she added, “Maybe I can find something crawling around to add to our evening meal.” She giggled when she heard his low growl.
As they searched through the trees, their conversation remained on the task of finding healing ingredients. Although the mood in the air was somewhat tense, she was relieved. She had feared he stayed behind to tell her something she wasn’t going to like to hear.
Since Tianna had been in a dense forest for days, she longed for the warming caress of the sun. When she spotted a bright beam of sunlight streaming through a gap in the trees, she decided to stop. The ground looked so soft and inviting that she laid down to soak up some sunrays.
Nathaniel watched her skin begin to glisten. He approached and sat down on the ground next to her and said, “Tianna?”
He said her name so tentatively that she sat up to look at him better. “What’s wrong Nathaniel?”
“I had a talk with Gabriel when we were in Willow. He reminded me how important it is for our group to be open and honest with each other.” He turned and gazed into Tianna’s eyes. “I need to be honest with you about a few things.”
Tianna sat up the rest of the way and her stomach clenched. Given the look in his eyes, she knew that she had been right earlier. He was about to tell her something she didn’t want to hear. She put her hand on his knee and said, “Nathaniel, if this is about me teasing and kissing you, I’m so sorr—”
Nathaniel placed his fingertips on her lips to quiet her, saying, “No talking please. I need to talk.” He began, “Do you recall when we were in villages, including Trille, and I left with women in my arms?”
Those weren’t pleasant memories for her, but she tried to keep her face neutral, nodding her acknowledgement.
“I want you to know.” He shook his head and corrected himself. “No, I need you to know what happened between the women and me.”
She forgot that she was supposed to remain quiet and said, “It’s none of my business what you do Nathaniel. You don’t need to explain.” The absolute last thing that she wanted to hear about was how he beds women.
He shook his head. “You don’t understand and I need you to.” He began to fidget nervously. “When I go off with any non-Draak female, I don’t take their bodies while they’re in my bed. I only hold them.”
Tianna gave him a look like he couldn’t possibly think she was that naive. She couldn’t understand why he was lying to her. If he didn’t want her, he could just say it.
He knew she didn’t believe him. “It’s true. My power to heal is greater than anyone in my Sett. This power comes with a price. It requires internal energy to work. When I wield my power I’m weakened. The more I use, the weaker I get and I have to re-energize myself. I do this by taking energy from others. I could draw some power from males but not enough to make a difference. I’m assuming that is because physical touch is a critical part of the bonding process. The magic requires the intimacy be between potential mates. For me, that requires I use females. On our travels, I like to use human women because they’re very susceptible to my mind control. That allows me to fully control the situation.”
He didn’t want to scare her, but he needed her to know the truth. “It can be dangerous for a Draak to bed a non-Draak. If he were to lose control, it could go very badly.” He shivered as his mind recalled a distant but very unpleasant memory from his youth. “So, in exchange for their energy, I allow them a memory of their choice. They can choose what their mind thinks happens between them and me.”
Tianna stared at him puzzled. “I don’t understand.”
Nathaniel adjusted his body as if he was getting uncomfortable. He knew he needed to tell her the whole truth, except his secret was hard to talk about. He had only confessed his need to one other person, a childhood friend, who had kept his secret safe.
He took a deep breath and began to explain. “I lay with them, usually naked since I need my skin to touch theirs. Sometimes we may kiss, but I use my mental powers to control them so nothing more happens. Once I’m strong again, I use my mind to let them fill in the gaps with whatever memory they want, as long as it’s a pleasant one. Usually they choose a memory that was very passionate. I guess I’m quite the lover in many a human woman’s mind.”
Nathaniel smiled at Tianna trying to lessen the tension within his chest. “If I’m very low on energy, my body will give out some kind of signal and any available female that is hit by this typically comes running. They’re ready and waiting. I’ve yet to find a way to turn this signal off.”
She wondered if she was hearing correctly. Was he telling her that he wasn’t taking all of these women in his bed? Could she believe him? She asked, “Why would you want to turn the signal off? I’d think any male would love to have women falling at their feet. I have to admit, you often appear thrilled as you walked away with these women in your arms.”
“That’s because I don’t want anyone to know of my need. It would make me very vulnerable as a warrior. Having people think I’m quite the lover is a better cover story.”
“Do your brothers know this?” Tianna asked with genuine interest.
Nathaniel spoke clearly and with confidence. “No. You’re only the second person that I’ve told. It’s difficult for me to even speak the words out loud to myself. It’s been hard to keep this secret given that I travel with only male Draaks and we are on the trail alone for many weeks at a time. Sometimes I’m so weak that by the time I enter a village the women literally come running.”
Tianna recalled Seth’s words describing women’s reactions matching almost exactly the words she was hearing now. “Is it the same for magical females? You mentioned Draaks. Are they different?”
He didn’t want to tell her yet about the Draak mating customs that he had indulged in regularly. “I’ll be honest with you. Draak females are different than other magical creatures and I’ve taken many to my bed. There are Draak customs that you’ll need to learn about, but we can save that conversation for another day.” The idea of Tianna engaging in their mating customs with other Draak males made his skin crawl. Just the thought made his dragon stir uncomfortably.
Tianna remembered the discussion she had with Gabriel about Draak customs. Her cheeks became warm, and she decided that she wasn’t ready for that conversation with Nathaniel.
Tianna put both hands on his leg and squeezed. She was touched by his trust in her. “I’m glad that you’ve confided in me, but I must ask, why are you telling me and why now? You’re a very attractive and unmated Draak. What you do in private is none of my business.”
He cleared his throat. “What you think of me is extremely important. My heart aches when I see the look in your eyes as I walk away with someone in my arms. In Willow, the feeling was so strong I couldn’t lay with another without seeing your face. And then when you kissed me...” He trembled at the memory. He placed his hands gently on both sides of her face and said, “I never want this face looking at me in disgust ever again. I want this face to look at me the way other women’s do. The way you did when we kissed.”
He knew what she might be thinking so he quickly added, “My mind powers, for some reason, don’t work on you so if you’re going to look at me with desire, you have to do it all on your own.”
At his touch, Tianna’s heart skipped a beat and she swallowed hard. Was he telling her that he actually wanted her? An inner voice urged her to kiss him senseless.
Nathaniel could see the look he wanted to see starting to appear on her face. “That’s the look I want.” He pulled her toward him and kissed her gently on the lips.
As their lips touched, her mind swirled and she broke away from the kiss. Part of her mind yelled its approval and filled her thoughts with urges that made her want to blush. But another, deeper part of her mind, couldn’t believe that a male, any male, truly wanted her. Maybe this was all a trick and he was just toying with her affections.
Nathaniel could sense her inner conflict. “What’s wrong?”
She hung her head. “I’m having a hard time believing you.”
Nathaniel quickly replied, “I swear to you, what I’ve told you about my need to touch is real.”
She shook her head. “I believe that part. I can sense you’re telling me the truth.”
Nathaniel was confused. “Then what part don’t you believe?”
She sighed and decided to tell him the truth. “I don’t believe that you truly want me. No one has ever wanted me that way.”
Nathaniel’s jaw dropped at her words. Her response took him completely by surprise. How could this beautiful female still think males didn’t want her? How could she think he didn’t want her? He lifted her chin so he could look at her face. ‘I’m not a human man from your village. You must trust me when I tell you that I want you more than I’ve ever wanted any other. Your kiss proved that to me. I’ve had to fight the urge to take you into my arms, but I can no longer contain my feelings. I want you by my side.”
Tianna said, “I want to believe but…” She started to pull her face away from his hand. Nathaniel could feel her doubt like a bad taste in his mouth. He decided the only way he was going to convince her was to show her how he felt. He took her face back into his hands and held on tight so she couldn’t squirm away. He leaned in and kissed her. First the kiss was gentle but quickly grew in passion.
Tianna thought of making him stop but when his tongue touched hers, she tasted him and all hesitation left her. She began to kiss him back as hard as he was kissing her. She could sense his honest desire for her.
Without breaking the kiss, a voice in her mind guided her and she crawled onto his lap with her legs straddling his body. Their kiss became even more intense as she put her hands on either side of his face and began to practice what she had learned from Gabriel. Nathaniel moaned and pulled her body tighter against his chest. He decided at that moment that he was going to just sit there and kiss Tianna for the rest of his life.