Until I Die Again [On The Way To Heaven] (Soul Change Novel) (16 page)

“And what did he have to say?” Her voice sounded strained, despite her effort.

“He got his alexandrite back.”

“Oh.” She fiddled with the fabric on chair. “Does he know who took it?”

“No. He figures the thief panicked and decided to give it back. Probably couldn’t fence it. He found it in a paper sack on his doorstep. He hadn’t even called the police yet. Said he wanted me to know first.”

Hallie let out the breath she’d been holding. “That’s wonderful! I’m really happy for him.”
Okay, Dave. I got the hint. You can be trusted.

When she finished her piece of chicken and declined another, he handed her a little packet that contained a wet napkin. Afterward, he walked through an opening to what she guessed was the kitchen. She almost expected him not to return.

He did come back, and she let her gaze trail down his gray striped shirt and black pants before meeting his eyes. She tried to dismiss the growing pace of her heartbeat. He looked at her as if he was considering something. His gaze flickered down to her left hand, and she saw an almost imperceptible narrowing of his eyes. She knew, of course, that he was looking at her wedding ring.
Her
wedding ring. It sounded so strange.

“I’m going down to Captain Morgan’s for a drink. It’s a little place on the bay, kind of tropical and laid back.”

She looked at him, anticipation growing inside her, along with confusion. Was he asking her to go with him, or just telling her where he was going? Without her. She smiled. “Sounds nice.”

He nodded, but she could tell his thoughts were on something else. “So what did you do today?”

“Drove around some, checked with the community college to see about taking some classes.”

“Really? Why this sudden urge to learn?”

It’s what I’ve always done,
she wanted to say. “I have to do something with my life.”

“Oh. I figured you’d gone down to the beach. Your nose is a little red.”

“I went to the beach with Joya yesterday. I had some questions.”

“About what?”

“Us.”

“Why didn’t you ask me?”

She stood. “Because you won’t talk to me.”

She expected a denial, or to hear again the reason why it didn’t matter. Instead, he said, “Let’s go,” and walked right passed her.

She watched that broad back and cute butt of his walk through the doorway, and she wanted to remain right there and make him come back to cordially invite her to accompany him. Then she realized that was probably as cordial as he was going to get, and she walked after him. Slowly.

Jamie had been looking forward to a pleasant night out at his favorite haunt. Why, then, had he invited his wife? Really he had wanted to ask Hallie why she was interested in going back to college, why she was asking Joya, of all people, about their marriage, and why she had made herself available to spend the evening with him instead of Mick. Even more, he wanted to know why he had invited her to join him.

Captain Morgan’s was a fun place, hopping just about every night of the week. Cantina music flowed into the parking lot, and palm fronds surrounded the entrance. After requesting the outside area, the hostess directed them to a table near the water. The air was warm and breezy, the colored lights reflected off the calm water, and Hallie looked more beautiful than he had ever seen her.

Jamie shook his head. Had he actually thought that? But as he looked at her, he could only reaffirm the thought. She was taking in every detail of the restaurant with a child’s awe, smiling at the little statues of grinning pirates, at the Macaw perched on a nearby tree whistling and making remarks. Everything. He had to quickly wipe the smile off his face when her gaze came to rest on him.

“This place is so coo-ol. I love it!”

“This place is so
what
?” He had never heard her draw out the word like that before.

“Coo-ol. Cool. Neat.”

He noticed that she refrained from using her old “completely excellent” phrase. “It just sounded different, that’s all.”

“Oh. Well, I am different.”

She gave him such an endearing smile, he had to turn away for a minute to gather his wits. Yes, she was different. He couldn’t deny that. But he was also sure that her old ways would return. She had lost her memory, not her personality. The miracle of her recovery could not include the miracle of a change in who she was. He couldn’t get that lucky.

“What are you thinking about?” Her soft voice poked into his thoughts.

He glanced up at the approaching waitress. “That it’s time for a margarita. Want one?”

“Sure.”

They ordered, and within a few minutes two huge, golden margaritas were delivered to their table. He watched her run her tongue over the salty rim before taking a sip, remembering kisses from long ago, when that tongue had tickled his mouth and other places.

“Whoa, that must be one good margarita…”

He realized he’d sucked down half of the drink in one pull. “Damn straight…”

She took another sip. “I’m not used to drinking. Uh, anymore. I feel a little high…” She leaned forward on the table, already looking relaxed from the drink. “You know what Joya said yesterday?”

“I can’t imagine.”

She ignored his jibe and continued, looking right into his eyes. “She apologized for interfering in our marriage. She felt responsible for luring me into going out with her all the time. Joya was jealous of what we had.”

“She actually said that?”

Her expression brightened. “Yes, she did. It gave me a better perspective of what had happened before. With us.”

He shifted uncomfortably. “Good. Maybe you’ll be better for it in your next marriage.”

Her soft expression crumpled, and she took a long sip of her drink, avoiding his eyes.
I’m sorry, Hallie, but you’re getting too close.
She settled back in her chair, putting distance between them.

During their second round of margaritas, their conversation stayed on safe subjects, far away from marriage and other sore areas. Her blue eyes were taking on a bedroom look, lazy with drink. Drinking had always had a strange effect on Hallie. In the early days, she became sexier, amorous. More recently she had become argumentative and usually picked a fight and stalked off. Maybe to become amorous with someone else. Now she looked more like she had back when he’d first fallen in love with her. Sexy, yet innocent at the same time. Quite a feat, but she pulled it off somehow.

Suddenly her eyes focused in on something behind him, and she stood up. He turned around, expecting to see some old boyfriend or lover. What he saw was an old man. And a dog.

“A Sheltie!” She raced off to the docks beside the restaurant.

He guessed that she must be talking about the Shetland Sheepdog and not the man. He followed, curious about this sudden interest in dogs she now seemed to have.

When he caught up to her, she was kneeling down and hugging the dog. The old man holding the leash was grinning with pride.

“She’s three years old, and her name’s Marisa. After my boat.” A gnarled finger pointed at a sailboat.

“Oh, she’s so beautiful. I used to have three of them, and I miss them so much.”

If Jamie didn’t know better, he would have thought she was in love with that dog. She caressed and hugged her, looking at Marisa’s face and smiling. Her long fingers disappeared in the thick brown and white coat, and the dog happily accepted the attention.

Hallie looked up at the man, seemingly unaware of Jamie’s presence. “And she’s so good with people. Mine would have shied away, at least at first.”

The old man laughed. “She doesn’t take to just anybody. She must sense something good about you, miss.”

When she finally looked up to see Jamie standing there next to her, she seemed to take hold of her senses. Her eyes glistened. Was she getting misty? Over a dog?

She stood up and artfully wiped them away. “Thank you for letting me pet her.”

“I’m sure Marisa enjoyed it as much as you did.”

Hallie looked at him, seriousness in her eyes. “No, I don’t think so.”

They walked back to the table in silence. He was completely perplexed by her reaction to the dog. She had never been much of an animal person, even to the cats her mother owned. Now she was crying over one.

“I didn’t realize you had dogs when you were young.”

“Oh. Well, it was a long time ago. I really miss them.”

“I can see that.”

She smiled, but the trace of tears in her eyelashes reflected the glow of the candle between them. He wanted to take her hand and comfort her, but it seemed like a ludicrous thing to do. She was getting much too upset over a memory of three dogs she had never mentioned to him before. One more thing to add to the mystery of the new Hallie.

After three golden margaritas, Hallie was feeling
whee-hoo-hoo.
That was how she and her friends used to refer to the state of feeling buzzed but not drunk. Remembering the phrase from her high school days made her smile. Since those weekend nights at Hallmont’s Pass, however, her drinking had been very limited. And the former Hallie’s immunity to liquor, from her party days, must have worn off in the last few weeks.

“Let’s go for a walk,” she said, wanting to get up and move around.

Jamie paid the bill, and she felt like a bum. “I should get a job so I can pay my own way.”

He looked at her in that strange way again. “You, get a job? You’re kidding, right?”

She tried her best to look indignant. “No, of course not. You think I haven’t worked before? I can do accounting, sales, and I can even tell you exactly why that green stuff grows in your fish tank.”

“You’ve had way too much to drink. Let’s go.”

They stood up, but she made her way to the walkway that led down to the docks where she had seen the Sheltie. Jamie followed, and she slowed so he could catch up. The air was clearing her mind a bit, but it wasn’t doing a thing for the feelings that marched inside when she looked at him walking beside her.

“Hallie…”

She turned and moved in front of him, causing him to stop lest he walk right into her. “Hmm.” One of the tall lights shone down near them, casting a warm glow all around.

He was looking at her in the oddest way. The tickle of margaritas made her grin sleepily, though she wasn’t the least bit tired. She looked at his lips, poised to say something. Her eyes moved slowly back up to meet his, and her smile faded.
You are my husband, Jamie. Why can’t you treat me like your wife?
She wanted to say that and more, but the words wouldn’t come.

He looked at her, through her, his blue eyes imploring hers. “Don’t,” he said, his voice deep and throaty.

Her own voice sounded far away. “Don’t do what?”

“Don’t look at me like you want me to kiss you.”

“I can’t help it. I do.”

The thin wall of ice in his eyes collapsed then, and he pulled her hard against him. His voice sounded muffled in her hair, and she felt his warm breath against her neck.

“Don’t do this to me, Hallie. I can’t go through it again.”

She stayed in his embrace for a moment, lost in the feel of his body against hers, his arms around her. Her heart ached for all that he had gone through, and for all that she wanted to do to heal those wounds.

“Jamie, can’t you forget the past? Can’t you please forgive what I’ve done?”

His hand went to his heart. “Girl, you don’t know what you did to me last time. The past is lost to you, but for me, the pain is still fresh. Only in the last few months have I been able to lock my heart away from you. Now you think you can come barging in and reclaim it? No, not now or ever.”

She was losing him. Through her tears she could see his soul moving farther and farther away from her reach. But he was still there, right in front of her physically. She tried to swallow back the tears, but it became harder when she reached out to touch him.

“Jamie, when I… when I died in the hospital. I came back for you. You are the reason I’m alive.”

“Hallie, don’t.” He pushed her hand away, backing up.

She pulled him closer again. “You don’t believe me, do you?”

“About coming back for me? No. Why would you come out of your coma for me when you didn’t even love me?”

“You don’t know what happened to me while I was in that coma. You don’t know, and I doubt I could ever explain it to you. I was on my way to Heaven, Jamie, and I asked for another chance for love. God gave me that chance, and He gave me you. I woke up, and you were there in my room, like an angel. I am certainly not perfect, but you won’t find another woman on all this earth or beyond who is more determined to make you see the power of love. If you really look, you’d know in your heart that I am a different woman now. You think I’ve just lost my memory and these changes are temporary. But you’re wrong, and if you knew how wrong you were, you’d hold me in your arms and never let me go.”

He just stared at her for a moment, as if absorbing her words. Then, very slowly, he began to clap, increasing the pace as he went. “Bravo! You’ve got the part, Hallie. You always were a hell of an actress.”

She fisted her hands, feeling ever so like pummeling that noble nose of his. “Damn, you. I spill my guts, and you applaud?”

“That’s right.”

Fury bubbled in her blood, mingled with the bitter taste of humiliation. Walk away? Slap him? Nah, go for broke, she thought, and leaned over and kissed him. He was clearly too shocked to respond; for a moment he just stood there while she kissed and kissed again, slowly and fully. Other than her lips, she did not touch him, did not pull him closer. His lips softened, forming to hers without actually participating in the kiss. She felt a trill in her heart, a tiny triumph that increased when he reached up to touch her chin. His grip tightened before he moved her chin away a few inches.

He studied her with mingled expressions of curiosity and anger. “You are something else, Hallie.”

Someone else, Jamie! Someone else.
“Yes, I am.”

“I liked it better when you’d pout and stomp off.”

She reached up and touched the hand that still held her chin. “I bet you did.”