Until You (30 page)

Whatever her response might have been was interrupted by the sound of a muffled cough coming from across the room.  Neither of them had heard Dr.
Ainsley
enter the room and Ashleigh's face instantly flamed in embarrassment.

Turning, Nicholas met the physician's uneasy gaze.

“I apologize for the interruption, Your Grace,” Dr.
Ainsley
said somewhat awkwardly.  “Her Grace informed me that Lady St. John had awakened and asked me to look in on her at once.” 

“Of course, Dr.
Ainsley
,” Nicholas responded stiffly.  “Please come in.”  Turning back to Ashleigh, he shot her a warning glance. “We shall be wed within the week,” he said, and then turned and stalked from the room, pulling the door closed behind him with a resounding thud.

It was her wedding day.  It hardly seemed possible, but the special license that Nicholas had procured just a few days earlier had enabled the ceremony to take place almost immediately.

Seated at her dressing table, with Madeline and Annie bustling about the room behind her, Ashleigh gazed absently into the mirror as she reflected upon the past week.  She still couldn't believe all that had happened in such a short period of time.  In less than an hour, she would be Ashleigh Elizabeth St. John Leighton, the eighth Duchess of
Sethe
.  She wondered what Nicholas was thinking at that moment.  Then again, she probably didn’t want to know.  She had only seen him in passing since that day in her bedchamber, when they had been interrupted by the arrival of Dr.
Ainsley
.

She had wanted to leave the next morning and return to
Glenbrooke
, despite what Nicholas had said, for she’d had no desire to marry him, knowing that he was being forced into the union by his sense of duty and family honor.  Surprisingly, it was Brendon who had ultimately convinced her to stay.  When he’d come to her room that morning she had told him of her intention to leave, as well as the reason why.

“Ashleigh,” he’d said.  “If there is one thing that I have learned about my brother; it is that no one could ever force him into doing something that he doesn’t want to do.  Believe me, dozens of women have attempted to get my brother to the altar in one way or another, and not one of them has succeeded.”

“Until now of course,” she’d replied with abject misery. 

“Listen to me Ashleigh.  I know Nicholas better than anyone.  Nothing, not even your condition, could force my brother into marrying you against his will,” he’d told her.

As she’d listened in horrified dismay, he’d then told her about Melissa Van Buren.  “For that reason alone I can guarantee you that Nicholas will not be coerced into an unwanted marriage, for anything or anyone,” he said.

“What are you suggesting, Brendon, that Nicholas
wants
to marry me?” she'd asked with a touch of derision, an attempt to hide the miniscule flare of hope that had sparked within her.

“That is exactly what I am saying,” Brendon had stated with conviction.  “You didn't see Nick's face when he carried you through the front door Ashleigh.  I have never seen my brother look so scared or so helpless in all my life.  He cares about you, a great deal more than he is willing to admit, even to himself.”

“Please, Brendon, don't,” Ashleigh had pleaded, not wanting to hear the words, knowing they weren't true.  If she dared to hope, well, she didn’t think she could bear another disappointment.  Her tortured heart had endured so much already.

But then he’d told her that Nicholas had seen them together in the sleigh the day before Christmas, and that he had immediately misconstrued the situation.  He’d also told her that he firmly believed that Nicholas’ ensuing anger and the cruelty of his words had been the direct result of his brother’s overwhelming jealousy. 
Nicholas
jealous?
  She’d hated herself for wanting to believe it was true.

Then he’d abruptly changed tactics.  “Do you really wish to deprive Nicholas of his child, his heir?” he’d asked.  “Do you wish to keep your son or daughter from ever knowing his or her father?”

“Brendon you know that isn't what I want,” she’d told him.

“What of your grandfather?  What of Madeline?  Do you want them to be hurt by the vicious rumors that are bound to circulate if anyone finds out about the baby?” he’d continued determinedly.

“Why would they be hurt?  No one ever has to know about the baby.  I will stay in seclusion until I can safely leave the country,” she said.

“Ashleigh, you must know that something like this cannot be kept a secret for long.  Although our servants are loyal, we cannot be assured that no one will find out about this.  Are you willing to jeopardize your family name, your grandfather's position in Society, and our family’s reputation as well?” he’d asked.  Clearly he had known that her love for her family was her greatest weakness and he had used that weakness against her.
 
In the end, she’d known she really had no choice. 

And now, her wedding day was upon her.

The ceremony was to be a small, private affair, with only, Alex, Brendon, and Madeline in attendance.  The local village parson had been called upon to perform the service, and as she’d been informed, he was waiting patiently in the drawing room for her to arrive even now.  She knew that Alex had arrived a short time ago as well, though she hadn’t yet seen him.  She would have invited Tiffany, but after penning a note to her friend, informing her of her return to
Sethe
Manor, she had received word back from a much-relieved Tiffany that she was traveling to
Dartford
to spend the next two weeks with her widowed Aunt Beatrice.  Once she returned, Ashleigh knew that she was going to have a great deal of explaining to do.

“Are you ready, dear,” Madeline asked, coming to stand behind her.

“Yes, I’m ready,” she said, rising from her seat.

“You look so lovely, Ashleigh.”  Madeline’s eyes grew moist as she surveyed her from head to toe.  “I am just sorry that your grandfather isn’t here to see you.”

“So am I,” Ashleigh said wistfully. 

“I hope you are not too disappointed that there wasn't time to have a gown custom-made,” Madeline stated apologetically as her gaze swept over the dress Ashleigh wore.

“Of course I’m not disappointed,” Ashleigh assured her, turning to view her reflection in the full-length mirror.   She raised her hand to the delicate pearl-encrusted neckline as her eyes roamed over the entire length of the dress.  The gown reminded her of the one she had worn to her first ball, but the style was of decades past, yet timeless in its beauty.  Fortunately, after some clever alterations, it fit her almost perfectly.  “I have never seen such a magnificent dress in all my life, and the fact that you are allowing me to borrow your own wedding gown means more to me than you will ever know.”

“I am so glad, for it means a great deal to me as well.”

Stepping forward, Madeline placed her hands on Ashleigh’s shoulders, looking at their reflections in the mirror.  “I already think of you as a member of my family and I know in my heart that you and Nicholas will find happiness together.”

“I hope you are right,” she whispered softly.

“I am always right, my dear,” Madeline whispered back, before giving her a reassuring squeeze. 

As Ashleigh followed Madeline downstairs to the front parlor, she hesitated upon the threshold, reaching up to grasp the silver locket that hung from a delicate chain around her neck.  It contained the likenesses of her parents, the two miniature portraits having been painted shortly after their marriage.  Today of all days, she felt the overwhelming sadness of their absence and the acute sense of loss.  She wished that her grandfather could have been there to give her away, but she understood the reason for haste.  Sadly, even her Uncle James was also absent, for as he so often was, he was away on government business.  However, as her eyes scanned the room and rested briefly upon Brendon, Madeline, and even Alex, she knew she wasn’t alone.  And with a smile, she thought of her baby.  How could she possibly feel alone when she had such a small, perfect life growing within her at that very moment?

When her eyes finally came to rest upon Nicholas, she realized that he had turned to look at her and was now regarding her with a look she couldn't decipher.  She hesitated in the doorway, held frozen by his intense, unwavering gaze.  For one brief moment she wanted to turn and run away from his penetrating gaze, but before she could move, Alex strode forward and took her hand in his, applying a gentle, reassuring pressure.

“You look breathtaking, Ashleigh, an absolute vision,” he said, pulling her forward into the room.

“I couldn't agree more,” Brendon added, as he too made his way to Ashleigh's side.  After planting an affectionate kiss upon her cheek, Brendon turned toward his brother.  “Nick, don't you think…”

“I believe we are ready to begin," Nicholas cut in, as he motioned to the elderly parson, deliberately ignoring Brendon's question.  He did in fact think that Ashleigh looked beautiful, far too beautiful and much too appealing for his current state of mind.  He wanted to remain detached, but seeing her in his grandmother’s wedding gown, knowing that his child grew within her womb, well, it was stirring up some uncomfortable emotions, emotions he wasn’t yet ready to define.

Madeline gave her eldest grandson a reproachful look, before attempting to ease the sudden, uncomfortable silence that greeted Nicholas' abrupt statement. 

“You must forgive my grandson, Father Michael, patience has never been one of his virtues I'm afraid,” Madeline said, keeping her voice light.

The ceremony was simple and over quickly.  Their vows had been spoken, Ashleigh's softly and somewhat hesitantly, while Nicholas' voice, though lacking emotion, had been strong and firm, legally joining them as husband and wife.  The ring that Nicholas slipped onto her finger was a huge, rectangular-shaped diamond, with a smaller emerald of the same shape on each side.  The ring was beautiful, but under the circumstances, the heavy gold band felt awkward upon her finger.  The ring should have symbolized their love for one another; however, she knew that it was only another item that he had been honor-bound to give her, just as he had been honor-bound to give her his name.

As if sensing Ashleigh's unease, both Alex and Brendon eagerly demanded to kiss the new bride, each of them with a bit more enthusiasm than may have been appropriate, leaving Ashleigh breathless and blushing, and Nicholas frowning at their over-zealous attentions.

Throughout the evening meal, Brendon and Alex gave Ashleigh no time to dwell upon Nicholas' somber mood, amusing her with the latest gossip from London, most of which she didn't believe for a moment. 

The two of them were being so wonderful that Ashleigh hardly noticed Nicholas' lack of participation in the discussion concerning Lady
Driedon's
Parisian bonnet.  If Alex was to be believed, Lady
Driedon
had appeared on
Durry
Lane several weeks past, seated within her white phaeton with her newly purchased Parisian bonnet perched upon her head for everyone to admire, when disaster struck. 

Having stopped to chat with two of her closest friends, who were also out for a Sunday drive through the park, the aging countess had immediately drawn their attention to her new hat.  Delighted by the ladies profuse compliments, she had reached up to adjust the bonnet, which was an elaborately weaved bird's nest of straw and ribbon, filled with several brightly-colored, hand-painted robin's eggs, only to have her hand painfully pecked by a small bird that had just landed upon the miniature nest.  Lady
Driedon
had screeched in fright, while her two friends, after recovering from their initial shock, had attempted to shoo the little bird from her hat.  The small, but tenacious creature apparently had not been willing to give up its perch without a fight however, and had stubbornly refused to budge from atop Lady
Driedon's
head, despite her near convulsive movements and horrified shrieks.  Seeking desperately to remove the bonnet, Lady
Driedon
had unwittingly tightened and knotted the ribbon which had been fastened under her chin, thus nearly strangling herself in her haste to gain her freedom from the obstinate little bird hopping about in angry agitation, and chirping loudly atop her custom-made bonnet. 

Finally, after literally wrenching the bonnet from her head with the force of sheer adrenaline, Lady
Driedon
had flung it from the carriage and then watched in horrified amazement as the little bird had picked up an end of the satin ribbon in its beak, and then tugged the entire contraption into the shrubbery alongside the path.  Unfortunately, in her haste to remove the bonnet she had unwittingly dislodged her elaborately styled blonde wig as well, which had then fallen into her lap, exposing a head full of thinning grey hair.  For the extremely vain countess, that had been the final insult.  She had then proceeded to give way to a fit of vapors that had her two friends rummaging through their reticules for their smelling salts.  By this time, the shrieks and cries of the three ladies had drawn the attention of several others, and unfortunately Lady
Driedon's
plight was witnessed by several members of the
ton
who had wasted no time in spreading the tale.  As Lady
Driedon
was known to be a malicious gossip, many of her peers had been overjoyed to learn of her embarrassing ordeal, which now had all of London laughing at her expense for a change.