Untouchable Things (31 page)

She wasn’t just blind, she was gagged too. When she moaned and thrashed her head from side to side he pulled harder to stop her. His cock rubbed her pubic bone and she opened her legs, unable to stop now.
Please fuck me.
But then she remembered. He slept with men too. She had to be careful. She pulled at the fabric and wriggled her face free.

Two eyes, more black than green, pupils dilated to mad villain proportions. He tried to re-cover her face but she shook her head. He pushed two fingers inside her. “Don’t tell me you weren’t enjoying that. I can feel for myself.” He hooked them back and tugged. She writhed as he beckoned.

“Stop it. We need a condom.”

“And luckily we have one.” He nodded towards a shiny square packet on the bedside table. She threw her arms round his neck.

“Come on, you didn’t think I was a total arsehole, did you?” She smiled. “Anyway, I’d say it’s time for a little role reversal.”

“Meaning?”

“You take charge.” He lay back on the bed, pulling her on top of him. As they kissed he pulled her hair down over both of them. One hand squeezed her buttocks. “About time, wouldn’t you say?” He came up for air and reached over. She hated this bit, didn’t know whether to help or even to look as he ripped open the packet with his teeth and pulled out the rubbery prize. She stroked him as he put it on, trying not to notice that he was going soft.

“Sorry. Just give me a second. Better still, take that negligee off.” She sat astride him and pulled it over her head. He caught it from her as she was about to throw it to the floor. “Do what I did to you. Over my eyes.”

“This over your eyes?”

He nodded. She rolled it up and pulled it across his face. She’d never used a blindfold before, hadn’t even tried those fluffy handcuffs. But she felt him becoming hard immediately as she held it tight. Her own arousal soared even as she wished she could see his face. He started murmuring and grabbed her hips. This was it. She lowered herself down. And down.

She was in charge. That was what he wanted and she exploited her power, moving around, taking him deep, taking him shallow, pulling the fabric tight until he was calling out, pulling her hair.

You were okay with this?

Yes and no. It… turned me on, but it was our first time, I wanted to see his face. I thought about saying something but…

Her body took over, she was coming and it was too late. Her orgasm was violent. Noisy.

Solitary.

His turn now, holding the negligee to his face and crying out something weird that might have been “God help me.” For a second he was still. She needed to see him, pushed aside the silk and his eyes flicked open, staring straight at her. “You’re the closest.” A whisper she wasn’t even sure was meant for her. Then, “Down you get, baby.”

She rolled off him and he bundled the used condom up in some tissue. He held out his arms and for a glorious minute she snuggled into him as he nuzzled her hair. Above her head a mirrored tableau of a perfect love scene. Then abruptly he got up, grabbing the condom. “Better get rid of this.” She heard the toilet flush in the ensuite and then the shower. She burrowed under the covers, hugged her knees, trying not to feel dirty, disappointed. Tearful.

Ten minutes later he emerged, clean and whistling, newly shaven and swaddled in a stripy dressing gown.

“This is not very gentlemanly but I’m afraid I have an appointment in half an hour. It had totally slipped my mind.” She stared, not quite understanding. He looked at his watch. “Unfortunately…”

“Sorry – I’ll go.” She sat up and looked for her clothes. Where were they?

“Ah, one second.” He left the room and returned with them, turning away as she took them from him and went into the bathroom. Her knickers were unwearable. It should have been a funny thing to share but instead she fought the tears away. He was waiting by the front door when she emerged. Leaned over to give her a soft, lingering kiss – on the cheek.

“Goodbye, Ophelia.”

Please stop calling me that.

Scene 25

Moving on, Miss Carmel, I believe your next Friday Folly meeting was… one second… Friday 16 May.

Probably, if that’s what the others have told you. Let me check my diary. Yes, that’s right… oh, wait a minute. Yes, I remember. That was the plan, the 16th, but it ended up being rearranged. Why? What’s so important?

Rearranged? No one mentioned this.

Well, they probably just looked back at their diaries and forgot we moved it. If it’s José and Rebecca you’ve been talking to, they’re both as disorganised as each other. I’m not sure Rebecca even keeps a diary.

Miss Carmel, it is absolutely vital that we clarify these timings.

I wish you’d tell me why. This is freaking me out.

The best way to help your friend is by cooperating fully.

Of course I’ll cooperate, what do you think I’m doing now? It’s Sunday morning, you know?

Thank you, we appreciate it. Please explain why the meeting was moved and exactly what happened.

Well, we all turned up at Seth’s place on the 16th as planned. The theme was Secrets.

Mr Gardner was there?

Yes. But he was feeling off colour. He asked if we’d mind if we rearranged to the following Friday and just hung out instead. I was relieved, to be honest. I hadn’t prepared anything.

Did he say what was wrong with him?

No, I thought maybe a stomach bug. The type of thing he wouldn’t want to talk about. He’s a bit squeamish about bodily functions. He was certainly pale. I remember that. He sat on the sofa while we all milled around. Probably hoping we would go, I guess. But we didn’t, of course.

What about the others? How did they seem?

Um, hard to remember, really. Let me think. Michael was quiet, which isn’t unusual. But he also seemed a bit less spiky towards Seth. I’m sure I heard them arranging to meet up, which surprised me. I didn’t think they did things just the two of them.

Can you remember when or where they were meeting?

No idea. It was just a snippet I caught. You’d better ask Michael.

And the others?

Well – a bit weird, actually, now I think about it. José, Rebecca and Little Miss Uppity. Not Charles. He was trying to smooth everything over, as usual.

Little Miss Uppity meaning…

Sorry, Catherine. She’s not exactly one for dancing on tables, but she was uptight even for her. Hovered over Seth, trying to wait on him. Nothing new there, I suppose. José was a bit the same, fussing around Seth like he’d had an operation or something, not a case of the Brad Pitts. To quote Jake.

The Br… ah, I see. Mr Etheridge was there then?

Oh yes, his normal self. Keeping up the patter and the bad jokes. Even Seth looked like he was getting fed up of it, which shows he was ill.

And you mentioned Miss Laurence?

Yeah, she looked a bit peaky too. Think she was pissed off with the other two fussing over Seth. I collared her to bitch about them – just mucking around, you know – but she wasn’t really up for it. Seemed preoccupied.

What time did you all leave?

Dunno, 11ish? We had a Chinese, tidied up a bit before we left.

So food wasn’t laid on? Wasn’t that unusual?

Well, without Jake no one could be bothered…

One second. I thought Mr Etheridge was there with you.

Yeah, he was but he left early. So…

Slow down, please, Miss Carmel. What time did Mr Etheridge leave?

Maybe around 9? I’m not sure, to be honest. Think he had somewhere else to be. It wasn’t a great loss.

I see. Thank you, Miss Carmel.

Have I given you what you need? I’d do anything…

You’ve been more than helpful.

Scene 26

The theme was carried over from the previous week. Secrets. A postcard had gone out with a quotation from Robert Frost, something about dancing around a secret.

Was that what they were doing at these groups? Rebecca sighed and tried to halt her increasingly paranoid thought flow. She hadn’t seen Seth since that day but they had spoken. It was the kind of conversation she used to love: teasing, lightly suggestive, familiar. Now it left her unsatisfied.

She was angry with him and in a state of constant arousal. She worried about him in a state of constant arousal. She washed the bloody dishes in a state of constant arousal at the moment. When she wasn’t having flashbacks of the actual sex she’d see his eyes flick open beneath her.
You’re the closest
. The closest to what, who? What did he want from her?

There was something else to worry about: she couldn’t find the brooch he’d given her. She was sure she’d put it on her coat before setting off last week for the group that never was but when she looked for it the next day her coat was joltingly unadorned. Since then she’d turned the flat upside down, even got Shazia to search her room, but there was no sign of it. Had it slipped off her coat at Seth’s? Had he found it, was he waiting for her to ask? But she daren’t ask in case she’d dropped it somewhere outside. How could she admit she’d lost his dead mother’s brooch?

She had her piece prepared: a monologue from
A Doll’s House
. She’d always fancied playing Nora and Seth would love her so kittenish. Her belly lurched at the thought of seeing him. More flashbacks.

Take your time, Miss Laurence. I can see this is difficult for you.

I’m sorry.

Catherine answered the door, looking, even for Catherine, odd and distracted. She barely said hello, peering past Rebecca onto the landing. Charming. Charles and Anna were standing by the coats talking quietly. Only Jake came up with his usual half-moon smile and enormous hug.

Rebecca hugged him back. “Hey. What’s up? Why all the faces?”

“Oh, just ignore them. They’re worried because Seth’s not here yet.”

“Not here?” Something bounced inside her.

“Hey, don’t you start. He’s got held up. He’s keeping us guessing. He’s also left us the run of his wine collection.” Jake took her hand and led her into the kitchen. “So, what’s it to be? Rioja or a New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc? I’d recommend the latter.”

Rebecca smiled down her anxiety. “I’ll be guided by you. Cheers.”

They touched glasses as Anna joined them. Rebecca kissed her.

“So, no Seth, I believe?”

“Not yet. Keep trying his mobile but it’s switched off. I missed a call from him earlier so maybe that was to warn us he was running late. Funny he didn’t leave a message, though.” She shrugged. “Cowardly bastard probably hasn’t prepared anything and can’t face us.” It sounded like Anna had used that line a couple of times already.

“How come we could get in here then?”

“It was on the latch.”

“Really?” Rebecca thought. “Surely that must mean he knew he was going to be late and didn’t want us hanging around outside.”

“Maybe. I always thought Seth was quite particular about locking up.” They sipped their drinks while Catherine kept guard by the door like an anxious spaniel. Ten minutes later all the guests were present and the host still missing.

“We could at least make ourselves comfortable while we wait.” They followed Michael’s suggestion and spread themselves out in the drawing room, trying to chat about normal things. No one sat in Seth’s armchair, which loomed large and empty.

“Hey, his cigarette box is still here. He never goes anywhere without it. Must mean he’s not far away.” José sounded puzzled.

“Could he have popped in on someone in the building, one of his neighbours?”

Anna snorted. “You must be joking. You should hear the things he says about them.”

Charles coughed. “It’s why he doesn’t use the communal gardens at the back.”

“
Swanky wanky Yankees
,” chorused José and Anna.

The repartee subsided and people sipped their drinks. Rebecca looked round and pulled a face. “It’s really strange sitting here in his house without him. I feel like we’re burglars.” She’d had a furtive look around for the brooch but there was no sign so far.

Jake smiled at her. “Not a bad idea, Becs. I’ve always fancied that hi-fi.”

The laughter flared and died like a badly struck match. Someone said they should try his mobile phone again. It went straight to voicemail.

“Well, we could make a start. But…”

It didn’t feel right to do that. Without any one of the rest of them the group could go ahead. But not without him. They couldn’t do it without him.

They tried to chat about their weeks and work, braking mid-sentence if someone heard a noise, starting up again when it turned out to be nothing. They looked at their watches. At 9.30 Jake said he’d get dinner ready and Seth could join them when he got in. They had to try to guess the secret ingredients in the array of tapas. It didn’t seem any fun without Seth but everyone tried to get into it.

Michael put down his plate. “He’s playing games with us. This is all a bloody game and we’re the losers.”

Rebecca held her breath. This was not the time to start arguing. But Anna seized the bait, almost gratefully.