She sighed and turned an angry glare in his direction. Now that she fully faced him, he could see the redness in her eyes from her tears. Crying would be good for her, but it still shocked him to see her do it. He was so used to seeing her stone-faced. Seeing her emotional made him want to reach out, tug her onto his lap, and hold her, just like he would a submissive—force her to talk. He had a feeling that Cara wouldn’t respond to that. She would fight against it, which would only add to her emotional turmoil.
“I thought that because I now feel emotion I couldn’t be that coldhearted killer I was. I was wrong. One look at Hayden lying on the floor, covered in blood, and I was right back there again. I killed one after another with no regard, no remorse. Feeling emotion made me more of a killer than I ever was when I felt nothing.”
“Why did you get so upset?” Alex asked.
She frowned and shook her head. “Because he was shot.”
“That’s not what I’m asking, Cara. Why did you get so upset?”
Her lower lip trembled. “Because I love him.”
Sighing, Alex reached out and took her hand in his, giving it a squeeze. “You did what any person in love would probably have done. It doesn’t make you a bad person.”
She pulled her hand free and stared down at her fingers. “That person I became… She scares me, Alex. I don’t ever want to be that person again, and that means I have to say good-bye to Hayden. He’s not good for me.”
Alex snorted. “That’s the most asinine—“
“Let it go, Alex, or I’ll throw you out of this ship on your ass.” Her eyes narrowed as she stared at him. “And you know I can do it.”
Alex leaned forward and narrowed his eyes as well. “I guarantee you’ll only do it once.” She remained silent, watching him as though weighing her options. Alex raised an eyebrow. “Now that we understand each other, fly us home.”
* * * *
Hayden rewound the footage and watched a third time. He’d never seen anything like it. His dad was right. The woman was a weapon. Sighing, he rubbed his hand over his mouth and chin, frowning at the feel of the stubble. He really needed to shave.
He shifted in his chair and winced at the pain in his chest. Two days, and it still hurt like a son of a bitch. He hoped to be better tomorrow. He wanted out of this house. Everywhere he went reminded him of Cara.
“You doing okay?” his father asked from the doorway.
Hayden looked up and met his father’s concerned stare. His mother had come back home yesterday. He wasn’t sure how they’d done it, but they’d kept her from learning Hayden had been shot. Dad said it would be better if she didn’t know. Unfortunately her shrewd eyes didn’t miss much, and he’d had to think on his feet more than once to explain away aches and pains.
His father leaned his broad shoulders against the door frame and crossed his arms over his chest. Hayden knew he was waiting on him to say something. “I’m fine,” Hayden replied as he hit the Off button on his father’s computer. “Did you ever figure out how they got in the house?”
His father nodded. “Phaze shift device.”
“How’d they get on the planet?” Hayden asked.
“Same way.”
Hayden’s eyes widened. “They phaze shifted a ship?”
“It’s possible. Same principle as an individual phaze shifter. Just requires more power. Once we realized how they did it, Taron was able to tap into the wavelengths the shifter puts off and found the ship. The government of Daego is adjusting their security to pick up wavelengths, as are we.” He nodded toward the computer. “That was a hell of a fight, wasn’t it?”
Hayden snorted. “More like a slaughter.”
His father’s lips twitched. Hayden didn’t see the humor.
“Alex called. The Mundi are in custody,” his father said. “The war is pretty much over.”
Hayden nodded but didn’t say anything.
“Cara is concerned that feeling emotion for you turned her into more of a killer than she ever was before.”
Hayden snorted but still didn’t say anything. She’d just up and left. Hadn’t even bothered to say good-bye. He should understand, he supposed, but the irrational side of him didn’t. He was in love with her and probably always would be.
“She believes you’re bad for her.”
Hayden scowled. “That’s rich.”
“She’s confused, Hayden. She’ll come around.”
Shaking his head, Hayden stood slowly and walked to the window. “I was the first person she saw out of that tube. I was the one who held her when she had nightmares. I was the one who talked her through a lot of her emotional overloads. It made sense she would fall in love with her doctor. It was a love built on gratitude, and she’ll get over it in time. It would never have lasted.”
“How very clinical of you,” his father said, and Hayden didn’t miss the sarcastic humor in his tone.
“I don’t need this, Dad,” Hayden said quietly as he stared out the window.
“I’ll say this one thing; then I’ll shut up on the matter.”
Hayden sighed, knowing he had no choice but to listen. His dad didn’t interfere much, but when he did, he would say his piece.
“Beena said you looked at her like I look at Mikayla. If you love her as much as I love your mother, you’re a fucking idiot to let her get away, because I guarantee you’ll never get over her.”
“Dad—”
“Hayden, I understand your point, I do. And I understand giving her time, but don’t be so stubborn as to let what could be a great love slip through your fingers all because you think she fell in love with her doctor instead of you.”
Chapter Fourteen
Four months later—Rhinari Trauma Center
Hayden took the stethoscope and wrapped it around the back of his neck. Lungs sounded clear. “You’re doing well, Mr. Kline. You should be out of here by this time tomorrow.”
The older man smiled at Hayden from his bed. “Thanks, Doc.” He pointed to the scope dangling around his neck. “What is that thing?”
Hayden grinned and tapped the scope with his finger. “This is an antique. It allows me to listen to heartbeat and lung sounds.”
“Don’t they have computers for that now?”
“They do,” Hayden said with a nod as he handed the patient’s records over to the nurse. “But I sometimes like doing things old-school.”
Mr. Kline snorted. “You’re too young for old-school.”
Hayden chuckled and patted Mr. Kline on the leg. “Get some sleep.”
His smile faded as he walked out into the crowded hall. It had been almost four months now since he’d seen Cara. Four incredibly long months. God, he missed her.
He’d thought about going to Bellara but changed his mind every time. Then he’d heard she was here on Rhinari. He’d waited to see if maybe she would come to him, but she hadn’t. Deep down he knew he was being stupid. He didn’t have an insecure bone in his body, at least until now. But then he’d never been in love with anyone either.
“Oh, Doctor.”
Hayden glanced up at the sound of his sister’s voice. He smiled at Miya as she strolled toward him, a stubborn glint Hayden knew well in her eyes. She was up to something. He would bet his last dime on it.
“Yes, my dear,” he replied as he turned to lean against the nurses’ station. “What can I do for you?”
“I actually need to talk to you.”
Hayden sighed. “Is it important? I have a lot of patients I need to see.”
“I know you’re busy, but it’s important.”
Hayden waved his hand toward the end of the hall. “Let’s head to my office.” Once inside, Hayden shut the door. “What’s up, Little Bit?”
She rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. “I really wish you guys would stop calling me that.”
“We’ve been calling you that since you were this big,” Hayden replied with a chuckle as he held his fingers up just a few inches apart. “Don’t expect it to change anytime soon. Now, what’s going on?”
“I guess you know that Cara’s—Where are you going?” she demanded as Hayden turned to leave the room.
“Miya, if you’re here to talk to me about Cara—”
“I’m here to club you over the head. You know she’s a senator of Bellara now, right?”
“Yes, Miya. You’re only about the fourth person in the family to tell me this.”
“Have you been by the senate building to see her?”
“No.”
Miya planted her hands on her hips and scowled. “Why not? It’s only two buildings away. Are you seriously going to ignore her when she’s that close?”
Hayden stared in surprise at his little sister. He’d never seen her quite so…forceful. She stood by his desk, her pretty green eyes flashing fire. Wow, she looked just like their mom when she was angry, but he could also see a big piece of their dad’s temper in there as well.
With a sigh, Hayden walked around to sit behind his desk. “Miya, this isn’t—”
“Don’t give me that bull,” she snarled.
“You didn’t even know what I was going to say.”
“You were going to say the same thing you always say. ‘She fell in love with her doctor, not me.’ ‘It passed.’ ‘She got over it.’ You’re an idiot, Hayden.”
His eyes widened at his sister’s harsh words. He’d never heard her say a bad thing about anyone.
She walked around his desk and leaned her hip on the corner. Crossing her arms over her chest, she glared at him. “She still loves you.”
“And how would you know that?”
“Because I talked to her.”
“What? Miya, what the hell—”
“Oh, shut up. I was curious. I wanted to meet the woman who stole your heart.”
Hayden rolled his eyes.
“Can you look me in the eye and tell me honestly that you don’t still love her?”
Hayden sighed and squeezed the bridge of his nose.
“Do you know what she has in the drawer of her desk?” Miya asked as he toyed with the handle of his desk drawer. “I saw it when she went to get something out of it. When I did, I asked her about it.”
Hayden didn’t say anything. He wasn’t sure he could.
“Cara can’t lie, Hayden. It’s something she’s never been able to master since coming out of that cryotube. She says what she thinks. What she feels.”
“I know,” Hayden whispered.
“She still loves you. I could see it on her face when she looked at the picture in her drawer. She’s afraid to tell you for fear that you don’t feel the same.”
She opened his desk drawer, and Hayden stared down at the picture he kept there. It was the picture that Beena had taken. The one where they were laughing at some stupid joke Hayden had said just to make Cara smile. She looked so beautiful in that picture. It was one of the few times she seemed carefree.
“It’s the same one you have. Beena gave it to her before she left.”
Hayden swallowed. Was it possible she still loved him? That the feelings she’d felt for him at the house had indeed been real?
“Hayden, please don’t be stupid. You love her. She loves you. Go talk to her.”
“How did you know that picture was even in there?” he asked, avoiding the real issue.
She shrugged one dainty shoulder. “I saw it when I came to get your remote to the…” Her lips twisted just before she whispered, “Speeder.”
Hayden’s eyes widened. “The what? Miya!” he bellowed, and she flinched.
“You told me to take care of your stuff while you were at the medical thing last week.”
“Not the speeder! You know I don’t like you flying that thing. It’s dangerous.”
“But it’s okay for you?” she snapped. Hayden started to say something, but Miya cut him off. “I like things that go fast too, big brother. That’s a little something I got from you.”
She stood and walked around the desk, putting it between her and Hayden. “This isn’t about the speeder, and we’re both fine, thank you very much. Your precious baby is back on the parking level safe and sound.”
“Miya!” he yelled.
“This is about you and Cara. Stop being stubborn.”
Hayden frowned. “Why is this so important?”
She lifted her chin and turned to leave. “Because this isn’t just about you anymore. Go talk to her, or I swear, I’m taking matters into my own hands.”
With that she walked out and shut the door. Hayden stared in awe. When had his little sister turned into such a firecracker?
* * * *
Cara thanked the other senators as they left her office, then turned with a sigh to Alex, who stood close by. He’d been such a huge help to her, getting her settled, introducing her to other senate members. He’d even been her support when she’d almost made a fool of herself and mistaken Senator Christian Marcone for Hayden.
Who knew two brothers could look so much alike and not be twins?
Sometimes it was hard to look at Christian. When she did, her heart broke all over again. She missed Hayden so much.
“Are you doing okay, Cara? You look a little tired.”
She removed her senate robe and threw it across the back of the chair facing the desk. “I’m okay. It’s just getting so hard to hide this now.”
“Yes. And it will get even harder.”
Cara nodded in agreement as took the cup of tea Alex handed her.
“You’re going to have to come clean at some point,” Alex said.
“I know,” she whispered, then blew across the steaming tea to cool it off. “Just not yet.”
Alex wasn’t going to give her too much more time. He’d already made it clear if she didn’t tell Hayden, he would. Alex believed it would be better coming from her, but the one and only thing in her new life that scared the hell out of her was facing Hayden and being rejected.
She moved to sit in the chair behind the desk. She had so much work to do, so many things to keep her mind off Hayden. Unfortunately, none of them worked. She kept thinking of him. How he smiled. How he made her feel when he touched her, kissed her. How he would hold her at night and keep the nightmares at bay.
She still suffered from them occasionally, but Hayden wasn’t there to comfort her when she cried out in her sleep.
She had at least accomplished one thing. The Mundi had been dissolved, thanks to Alex’s help and, of course, the fact that she’d killed a huge number of them that day at the lake house. The Order elders had been put in prison and Shorn admitted into a mental facility.
He’d been feeling emotions for years but had hidden it so well no one knew. Until the day she’d walked into the Order chambers. He’d completely lost it, shouting and throwing things at Cara, accusing her of ruining all his best laid plans. They’d all been shocked, even the other Mundi members. So much so, they’d just solemnly handed themselves over to her and Alex.