Vaewolf: Damn the Darkness: The Prophecy's Promise (Hearts of Darkness Book 3) (22 page)

“Fine. Honesty it is. You already know the answer, so why should I voice the humiliating truth? I don’t know if I’ve had the gene all along or if Shelby passed it to me. It does raise other frightening possibilities. In any case, I’m manifesting strong sex fae characteristics—dark fae. The need is greater than I expected.”

“Did Dylan know before he left?”

She nodded. “I think the fairy dust may have been the first clue.” She felt the heat burn her cheeks. “Max confirmed dark fae and wolf DNA, yesterday.”

“Max was here, around you, at this time? Who else?”

“Shelby, and no, Max didn’t come by. Chill out, Jackson. Shelby took my blood sample to him.”

Apparently, the future vampire king and Lycan leader wasn’t used to confrontations with mere humans. Scratch that. Made vamps.

If Caitlin bothered to check, his thoughts probably went something along the lines…“You’ve got one hell of a nerve questioning me when I can smell your need from here.”

The gut wrenching knowledge of how desperate the darkness in her lusted for him when she loved someone else disgusted her.

What did he think of her, and why did it matter? She couldn’t help the fix she was in. After all, she hadn’t asked for any of this.

Jackson was one of a kind. Everything about him called to her more strongly than before. No doubt by now it was more than his wolf. These last few weeks, she began to think, perhaps destiny had chosen her for both men for a reason especially now with the wolf DNA confirmed. Despite their resistance, no matter how hard they fought the Calling, she couldn’t deny the bond forming between her and Jackson grew stronger.

In spite of his conviction to hold back and his self-righteous attitude, he couldn’t hide what he wanted. His desire was as strong, if not stronger than hers. A flash of an image of him impaling her with the cock stirring in his pants came through, clearly showing her how desperate he was to
claim
her. And still he stubbornly held his ground, watching over her but refusing to betray Dylan in any way.

“Let me feed you.” His words were a tender caress.

“Why would you risk it?”

“Why?” The glare he sent her way through lowered lids accompanied the half sneer on his lips. “Because I can’t stand your Hunger, Caitlin. I can’t focus on anything else.”

There was nothing wrong with her nose. He was giving off a strong bonding scent. “You agreed to wait.” She backed up, suddenly concerned.

“This
is
me waiting.” His mind tugged at hers. “Unfortunately, you can’t. I feel your pain. And your
needing
is dangerous.”

Chapter Thirty One

Feeding

Caitlin wanted Jackson gone, this visit over, and distance between them, before the entity inside her did something she’d regret—something she swore she’d never do. The longer Jackson’s scent filled the air she breathed, the more painful it was to deny him.

She would never betray Dylan by binding herself to Jackson, but feeding the dark sex fae within her was different. The time to set things straight or discover what this thing between them was besides sexual attraction had come and gone. She didn’t think she could keep her darkness from taking what it demanded from the wolf.

“The more time we spend together, the harder it is to fight the connection the entity within me feels for you,” she admitted. Inevitably, would she finally beg him to fulfill those other needs, as well? “Sharing blood will bring us closer—would be even more intimate—would test our resolve to satisfy the rest.”

“Yes, it would, but
sharing
blood isn’t what I have in mind. I’m offering my blood.” He held out his wrist. “Take it. I’ve already fed.”

“Oh.” The idea of Jackson’s mouth suckling at the vein of someone else sent a frisson of jealousy whipping through her. The sense of loss was almost unbearable—enough to make her turn away and go without the nourishment she desperately needed. Weak as she was, she found it difficult to fight her emotions, the pain in her heart, and the ache deep in her core.

She should feed from him and build her stamina—her restraint.

“He’ll kill me if anything happens to you.” Jackson’s voice softened, and with a half grin, he tilted his head at her. “You want that on your conscience?”

“No, of course not.” She managed a smile in response to his teasing. Still the image of his mouth on some female’s neck disheartened her.

Whoever said the best defense was a good offense? She didn’t dare do what her inner beast wanted. She fought the driving desire to rip off his clothes and give in to the images streaming through her mind? Damn his control, and damn her lack of it.

“You have to leave.” She couldn’t resist him. “She’s fighting for control and I’m losing.”

If he continued to insist on feeding her when he knew how badly the sex fae needed sex, she’d show him why he couldn’t. Her thoughts filled with sexual images of the two of them, and the images unwittingly, slipped past her mental blocks.

“Oh,
cher
.” He groaned. “You’re playing with fire.” His husky tone left no doubt about how much she affected him.

“I’m not playing.” Caitlin didn’t recognize her own voice. It sounded different, huskier and needy.

“You know what I am—what she wants.” It returned to normal, and sounded desperate. “Go or she’ll be forced to seduce you.”

He didn’t budge. Instead, his thoughts filtered back to her. Carnal images of his roaring desire to respond to her scent, detailing how good she would feel beneath him—his hands, his mouth, his teeth on her—how he would sheath himself within her.

She inhaled suddenly with a gasp. Too quickly, heat slammed into her like a wall of flames, every nerve in her body exploded, and she climaxed, without a touch.

Startled by the orgasm and by the way he still held his ground despite his own growing arousal, she closed all her psychic pathways. He might be able to restrain himself, but Caitlin had no control over her own emotions. The orgasm fed her fae need for the moment. But in the process, had it weakened her own ability to resist.

When he could mentally make love to her and bring her to a mind-blowing climax with no more than images from his thoughts, she fought her curiosity about what the real thing would be like. Standing in the midst of the delicious scent his body threw off didn’t help her prevent fae’s imagination from forming her own sensual ideas.

“Don’t deny you needed that,” he said. “Just the scent your body is releasing conjured from those images is bludgeoning me.”

“Okay. I’m sorry.” Reluctantly she admitted, “I was weak and she was too hungry.”

“Don’t apologize for your nature. And you don’t need to worry. Now, we know how to hold her back. She won’t seduce me while I feed you.”

How freakin’ embarrassing.

“No need to be embarrassed. You can’t help it.”

Oh had she said that or let her mind shields down?

“Your mind is leaking. Better feed. The small amount wasn’t enough.”

He was hot, kind and understanding. Barf.

Then he smirked.

Oh shut up.

She needed blood, lots of it, and the herb...and both were running low. There’d been no relief from the constant sexual ache that had nagged her since the night of the party, or from the void Dylan left in his wake. Her need grew more demanding until, if not for the magic orgasm medication Shelby had the witch, Tanya, concoct, she couldn’t have tolerated the pain. But even Caitlin knew she wouldn’t have been able to survive these last few weeks as her life force dimmed. The additional mate bond she felt for Dylan and Jackson made the emptiness worse.

Lost in the aftermath of her virtual orgasm, her hunger for rich vampire blood weakened her control and her concentration.

Jackson slit his wrist with his own fang, and immediately the scent of musky male and warm, coppery blood mingled in the night air. The scent affected her and aroused the fae. The scent of the blood made Caitlin’s fangs descend over her incisors, elongating past her lips.

She dropped to her knees in front of him. Gripping his thick wrist in both her hands to prevent herself from touching him elsewhere, she drank and prayed her Hunger wouldn’t make her forget all her promises.

As she devoured Jackson’s rich thick blood, the blood lust suddenly became a strange sexual frenzy within her—one she feared she couldn’t fight off. The blaze inside her grew. The orgasm threatened. She wanted...what? A touch? The thrust inside her? He tasted like nothing she’d ever imagined. Like Dylan, maybe the Niccolai part, and some wild flavor, too.

A gentle hand brushed over her hair and pushed it back from her face. Jackson gripped a handful and didn’t move when she glanced up. The grimace on his face, the tightness of his clenched jaw, and the naked need in his narrowed eyes told her how raw his feelings were. The pure masculine sensuality in his expression drove her body to the breaking point. Waves of heat rolled through her until the orgasm hit, and the violent shudder physically racked her body.

Jackson stood like stone—watching and unblinking—unmoved and controlled when she wasn’t. Ignoring her proximity to his groin and the straining denim over the impressive bulge, she sent the darkness away, retracted her fangs, and licked the wound at his wrist closed.

Caitlin raised an eyebrow in question. “Does she scare you?”

Jackson glared and gave out a frustrated snort.

“Not
scare
exactly. I can control myself and handle your hunger now, but not when your sex fae tries to distract me.”

Caitlin put her hands to her face. “I can’t stop the bitch. She climbs out from inside me, and I can’t stop her.”

“No one understands what you’re going through more than Dylan or I do. We have learned to deal with the same battle to control the darkness within our bodies.”

“How long will it—”

“For you?” Jackson chuckled. “Not long enough to see us through our crisis I’m afraid.”

“Oh, God what will we do?”

“Hush,
cher.
You know I don’t want to hurt Dylan any more than you do, but to my wolf, your needs are more important than his feelings. You must feed and often. I can’t hold back much longer. The full moon, is next week, and I won’t come to you, then. Can you hold off?”

“Yes. There’s enough herb left. Tanya’s trying to find more.”

Caitlin stepped back, vigorously shaking her head. “Will you tell me something I’ve wondered about since that first night?”

“If I can.”

“Why did you run off before we could deal with all this together—the three of us. Can you tell me?”

“I didn’t trust myself.” Jackson glanced aside, looking uncomfortable and shrugged. “When the wolf in me recognized you as my mate, I was, still am, too unstable,” he whispered. “I had to get away.”

“Under the circumstances, I would have expected you to be upset. Why didn’t you come back later with Dylan so we could work things out together?”

“Dylan and I talked it out, and he fully comprehended where this was heading.”

“Yeah? Well, I wish someone had filled me in.”

“Were you ready for the truth?” He wiped the back of his hand across his forehead. “You’re not ready yet.”

“You’re right. I can’t deal with it, any of...this.”

“I understand. I tried denying the
calling
, but my inner wolf fought back. His need and instinctive urges overpowered my own. An inexperienced Lycan imprinting on his mate can be dangerous for everyone around. Add the fact I’m half vampire...well, there was a chance I might rip off your head or drain you.” He winked at her with a half grin. “Neither seemed a good option for any of us.”

“Agreed. I take it you were a conflicted teen at one time, too?” Caitlin couldn’t resist the smile, and released a nervous giggle.

His unexpected low laugh sounded good, and when he looked at her, his slow smile disrupted the strain in the darkened room. He reaffirmed her previous opinion. Jackson was a devastatingly handsome man when he wasn’t scowling.

“Seriously. I understand conflicted. I’ve felt it often enough myself.” Caitlin rejected any possibility that would test her love and loyalty to Dylan.

“You won’t understand why I left that night.” Clenching and unclenching his fists, the tension in Jackson intensified until she took his hands in hers.

“Try me—” she said bringing his hands to her hips.

“I don’t know how to explain...” The expression on his face seemed more concerned than usual, but the chuckle was purely sardonic. “I’ve even practiced—different approaches, using different reasons—always denying the real one. Because the terrible one I can’t face—the one I keep denying—is the one true reason I ran.”

“Jackson, what happened to
honest
? That goes both ways, with yourself and with me. We have to at least start somewhere.”

He took a deep breath and began talking. “Lack of maturity, experience, and self-control—all those excuses would have meant nothing if it had come down to my wolf against me. I wouldn’t have been able to stop the wolf from forcing you, and forcing me, to take…no bind you to me as my mate. My beast would have demanded your submission, and I would have stolen you away from Dylan, no matter the consequences.”