Authors: Julie Cross
Dad stood up and walked toward the door. “I’ll let Dr. Melvin and Chief Marshall know
what the plan is. Come see me before you—”
“Sure,” I said, cutting him off. “If that’s what you want.”
Adam’s eyes were clearly fixated on me as I began to write. “Dude, what’s going on
with you?”
“You mean, besides the obvious,” I said, not looking up from the paper. The flat emotionless
tone that came out of my mouth surprised even me.
“Fine … whatever,” he grumbled, flopping back onto the bed. “It’s not like I could
ever
help
you with anything.”
His sarcasm really pissed me off. This was hard enough without Adam making me feel
guilty. He had other friends besides me. He’d be fine. I was going back to a place
where I didn’t trust
anyone
. Even that version of Holly had been playing mind games with me at Healy’s ball.
I knew that was different than having a highly trained agent screwing with my head,
but still … it was
Holly
.
“Everything’s gonna be fine. You have nothing to worry about. Both of you will be
placed under the best protection the CIA can offer,” I recited mechanically.
“Great. A real comfort … especially after witnessing your transformation from my friend
to some order-following robot.”
I ground my teeth together and reached for a new piece of paper. He wasn’t going to
get to me. Not here in this timeline where I knew I couldn’t stay.
He walked closer and started reading over my shoulder. “
Dear Holly. I apologize for leaving so abruptly. A lot of things in my life are complicated
right now. This wasn’t an easy decision for me
… You forgot to say,
It’s not you, it’s me
.”
I covered the paper with my arm and looked up at him, keeping my face as calm as possible.
“This is personal.”
He groaned and shook his head. “No, it’s not, man … not even a little.”
Ouch
. I ignored him and went back to writing, but a couple seconds later he pulled the
paper right out from under my hand. I stood up, reaching for the letter. “Seriously,
cut it out.”
Adam’s face twisted with anger and he ripped the page in half before I could stop
him. “She loves you!”
“Don’t—”
“Holly loves you and you expect me to give her this bullshit letter and wait for her
to just forgive and forget … That’s the most demented thing I’ve ever heard.” He dropped
the pieces onto the floor and threw me a disgusted look. “I told you not to mess around
with her … but that’s all right … You can go back to whatever version of Holly you’ve
got waiting for you and I’ll take care of this one.”
He was so close, staring right at me, and I couldn’t cover it up. My heart sank and
the grief was all over my face. Adam’s anger dissolved in about two seconds. “What
happened…? Did she get shot again, or…?”
I shook my head but didn’t say anything else.
“Come on … you gotta tell me. Is something going to happen here, like, in the future?”
He grasped my arm, forcing me to stay right in front of him.
“The only thing you need to do is keep her away from the other me,” I said a little
too forcefully.
Adam stepped back and dropped his hand. “I just don’t get it. You were so pissed that
your dad lied to you … and you just told him to keep you in the dark until the time
travel starts. How do you know telling the other you about what you’ll be able to
do in the future won’t help it to happen earlier … or maybe you
won’t
think it’s that crazy? And maybe I could help that version of you, and tell Holly
about some of it. She could at least see the other you that way.”
“No!” I said. “Do you know what that version of me would do to Holly? Because I have
a pretty good idea. He has no reason to talk to you, either.”
Adam’s arms folded over his chest. “So
that’s
what you really think … that if you weren’t trying to figure out why you could time-travel
in 2009, you would have never become friends with someone like me? You talk about
that guy like he’s a different person. It’s still
you,
Jackson.”
I didn’t know if he was right about the reasoning behind our friendship. There was
no way to repeat that process and find out for sure. But I couldn’t even attempt to
swallow the idea of 007 Holly hooking up with the seventeen-year-old me. I knew
exactly
what went on in
his
head.
“Don’t do it, Adam,” I pleaded. “Promise me you’ll let it go.”
“Okay, fine … so you’re not with Holly in the future alternate universe or whatever.
I get it,” he said, more exasperated now than angry. “But you’re alive. You can keep
jumping. How do you know there’s not some tiny sliver of hope that it’ll work out?
Don’t you want to leave her with something better than that garbage you wrote, just
in case you come back?”
Hadn’t I just said that to Dad a few minutes ago, when I told him to take care of
Adam and Holly?
I sighed and rested a hand on her cheek. “I don’t know. I just don’t know what’s better,”
I admitted.
“She won’t hate you for leaving. Neither will I,” he said. “Do you ever think maybe
it’s just meant to be … that Holly’s always going to love you … all those versions
of her … and even someone with superpowers like you can’t keep it from happening?”
The way he said this wasn’t manipulative or a guilt trip, it was a real question,
so I allowed myself to process it. “The timeline I just came from … that Holly … doesn’t
like me at all, and she’s got someone else. And the first Holly I met … she really
didn’t have the best impression of me.” I shrugged, like it didn’t matter, like it
didn’t hurt. “So, there’s your answer, I guess.”
He shocked me by laughing. “Well, all the versions of me have liked you, so at least
you have that.”
“Gee, I wonder why,” I joked. “The dimples, right? Not the fascinating-freak-of-nature
part.”
He gave my shoulder a hard shove, but he was still laughing. “Finally, the robot’s
gone. Now write a decent love letter, asshole.”
It only took about half a second to decide what to write. Five words … that was all
I needed to say. I quickly folded the paper and stuffed it inside her purse. I heard
Dad call my name from the other room.
“Can you tell him I’ll be right there?” I asked Adam.
“Yeah, sure,” he said, walking out the door and shutting it behind him.
I lay down beside Holly again and rolled her on her side to face me. “Holly? Wake
up…”
Her eyelids fluttered a little and opened halfway.
“Holly?” I tried again.
“Does my mom know you’re in my bed?” she mumbled.
I smiled at her even though she couldn’t see me. The second my arm draped over her
waist, she scooted closer and curled up against me. “Actually, you’re in my bed.”
“Yeah,” she said with a sigh. “It smells like you.”
I had to get away from here … or else I wouldn’t. I kissed her cheek and spoke right
in her ear, “Don’t fall in love with any football players.”
Her eyes flew open and she shot up, nearly banging her head into mine. “Did I … did
I drink a lot of champagne or something…?”
I sat up, too, and smoothed her hair down with my hand. “Um … you might have. I’m
not sure.”
She glanced around my bedroom and I just stared at her, letting a million different
emotions flood over me and bury me … Then my hands were on her face. Just as she opened
her mouth to speak again, my lips were on hers.
Her response was immediate. She had her hands on the back of my neck, fingers in my
hair, then under my shirt.
“I have to tell you something,” I mumbled against her mouth.
“Yeah?” She pressed her mouth harder against mine and then pulled back a little. She
lay down on the pillow again and I could see her eyelids fluttering as if she couldn’t
hold them open.
“I just … it’s just…” I rested my head beside hers and felt around for her hand before
squeezing it. “Nothing is easy for me. Being here with you … being without you … it’s
all so hard, and it feels like I’ll never be able to breathe again…”
She kissed me once more, pressing her whole body against mine. After several long
seconds, she pulled away, but kept her arms around me as if she knew I was about to
leave her. “You love me,” she said.
“Yes, but—”
“That’s why it’s hard. I know what you mean … I didn’t want to love you … I didn’t
even want to like you, but I do.” She smiled as if she were joking, but I knew she
was just playing it cool, in case she revealed more than I had. “This would be much
easier if your Dad really was a janitor.”
Oh right … I almost forgot the lie I originally told about my family to 007 Holly.
I’d have to be a complete idiot to leave this girl. An absolute moron. I buried my
face in her hair, holding on to her for a long time, and then I kissed her cheek before
letting go.
She was breathing deep again, eyes sealed shut in a drug-induced sleep. I slid off
the bed and gave her one more kiss on the cheek. It took every ounce of willpower
I had to not crawl under the covers with her and fall asleep …
I stepped into the hallway and immediately felt the presence of someone. The slightest
shuffle of feet … the almost-silent breath that was just drawn in. I flung the hall
closet door open and reached blindly into the dark for something to grab. My fingers
wrapped around a shirt and I yanked the owner out, surprised by the lack of weight.
I pressed the person against the wall and finally got a good look at the scrawny freckle-faced
kid.
“Mason!” My hands were already shaking. Images of his body dissolving to bits reeled
through my mind and I couldn’t push them out.
“Jackson, it’s okay, he’s one of us!” Dad said from the other end of the hall.
I came here to save Mason, to fix him … I had almost forgotten. Maybe I needed to
know more or something, so I could jump more purposefully. “Mason, you gotta tell
me something … some personal info … something that will help me—”
“Let go of me!”
“Jackson?” Dr. Melvin said. “Is this why you’re here?”
Mason lifted his foot and gave me a hard kick in the stomach before I could stop him.
I stumbled back into the wall, clutching my midsection. Mason’s eyes darted between
me and Dr. Melvin and Dad … Comprehension came quicker than I thought it would, and
his entire face filled with panic. Fifteen-year-old agent-in-training Mason drew a
gun and pointed it right at me. “It’s you, isn’t it? You’re the experiment. I heard
you talking to your friend about Axelle.”
“Mason…” Dr. Melvin said.
I lifted my hands up in front of me, not able to hide the shaking fear in my voice.
“I really have to help you … Not here … Maybe I just need to know things about you …
anything.”
Maybe, if I could get a better feel for Mason’s life before I knew him, I’d be able
to do the Thomas-jump to help him. Strong emotional memories always seemed to take
my power to a higher level.
He lowered the gun, his eyes locked with mine. “What happens to me? What’s going to
happen?”
“Do not tell him anything!” Marshall boomed, fighting his way into the hall. “Agent
Sterling, you will hand over your gun and leave immediately.”
Mason didn’t budge and I wasn’t all that surprised by his stubbornness. I’d seen it
before many times. “Tell me what happened!”
“No!” Dad and Marshall said together.
Then everything that followed happened in a five-second blur. Mason pointed his gun
down the hall and fired straight over everyone’s head. They dove down anyway and he
came charging at me full-speed.
He threw a hard punch right at my jaw. “I fucking hate you! If you weren’t around,
they wouldn’t even come after me … or any of us … It’s because of you!”
His anger hit me so hard, I couldn’t even fight back. “I’m sorry, Mason … I’ll fix
it … I’ll fix everything … I swear.”
“Jackson, go … get out of here!” Adam shouted, but I couldn’t even see him.
I caught Dad’s eye from the opposite end of the hall. He gave me a tiny nod, just
as another one of Mason’s blows hit me right in the temple.
I shoved Mason off me and dove into the bathroom, but I only waited a second before
jumping back to 2009.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
JUNE 17, 2009, 11:00
A.M.
I must have fallen asleep right after jumping back to 2009, because when I finally
opened my eyes and took in the borrowed CIA apartment, light was streaming through
the windows.
And there was an intruder sitting on the end of my bed.
I leaped up, tossing blankets aside and nearly tripping over Mason’s duffel bag …
the one I had brought with me last night from his locker in the underground lab. The
intruder sat with an eerie calm as I caught my breath and prevented my own heart attack.
Jenni Stewart
.
Not the usual Agent Stewart, this was the train-wreck version. She still wore her
clothes from last night, dried blood, grime, and all, her hair flying in a dozen directions.
She looked absolutely demented. I kept one hand wrapped around my phone, which I must
have fallen asleep holding on to.
“Stewart … I’ve been trying to call you?” I said, walking back toward the bed.
She lifted up a pink notebook, covering her face with it. “Recognize this?”
“No,” I said right away, and then looked closer. It was just some kind of journal
or diary. Actually, Holly had one like that … 009 Holly. So, this 009 Holly would
probably have the same notebook. But where was Stewart going with this? She saw us
dancing last night, maybe? Or overheard some of the conversation? It didn’t matter.
I’d lie and deny anything more than what she’d seen.
She slowly opened the notebook and read a little yellow Post-it pressed to the inside
cover. “
Jackson, this was left in my hands and you should have it. It might help.
” She looked up at me, raising her eyebrows. “This is your dad’s writing…”