Welcome to Serenity (34 page)

“Wait,” she whispered, stilling his hand in place on her thigh. “Let me.”

She made quick work of unbuttoning his shirt and tossing it aside, then lifting his T-shirt over his head to reveal a muscular chest and solid abs that felt warm and unyielding under her eager fingers. He moaned softly as she explored, then gasped when she unbuckled his belt and reached lower, her hand encasing his impressive arousal. He moved restlessly, his impatience now a match for hers. That was what she’d wanted, what he’d claimed to want not that long ago—to be on the same page.

His pants came off, then her slacks and then they were back together, skin on skin, heat seeking heat, their hands and mouths everywhere, teasing and taunting until both of them were breathless and hungry with need.

“Now,” she pleaded. “I’ve waited so long for this.” What an idiot she’d been to wait so long! And yet she knew that weeks ago it wouldn’t have been like this at all, wouldn’t have been two people in tune with each other on so many levels. Then, it would have been just sex. Now, maybe, just maybe, it was love.

She shivered as Tom removed the scrap of lace that passed for panties, then tossed aside his own boxers. He lifted himself over her, gazing deep into her eyes as he plunged into her, filling her, then withdrawing slowly before plunging again. The rhythm took on a life of its own, building a sweet, delicious urgency that carried Jeanette higher and then higher still before erupting into spasms that spread through her, leaving behind heat and pleasure. Just as she was recovering from the wonder of that, Tom began to move again, taking her to a whole new place before his own release ripped through him and then her again in a way she’d never experienced before. Two people as one, just as she’d always imagined it could be. The wonder of that made her want to weep.

She didn’t realize a tear had fallen until she saw him regarding her with concern.

“Are you crying?”

“No,” she insisted, despite the tears that kept falling on his chest.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Everything’s perfect.”

“Are you sure? You haven’t said much.”

“I don’t think I can,” she said. “My mind’s gone.”

He grinned at that, his expression smug. “Is that a compliment?”

She nudged him in the ribs with her elbow. “Do you need to have everything spelled out for you? Isn’t it enough that I can barely move or catch my breath?”

“Just checking. And, in case you were wondering, you were pretty amazing yourself.”

“I wasn’t wondering,” she assured him pertly. “I know I’m good.”

He laughed. “Confidence is one of the first things I noticed about you.”

“And here I thought it was my body.”

“That was the second thing,” he said. “Right after you banished me from the spa.”

Without covering herself, she propped herself up and looked at him. “What else?”

“What else?” he echoed blankly.

“Why are you attracted to me? Please tell me it’s not just because your parents don’t approve.”

“That’s irrelevant,” he insisted. His heated gaze lingered on her. “Believe me, you have plenty to recommend you. I like the way your mind works. I like your sense of humor. You’re not impressed with me, which is annoying but challenging. And you’re not half-bad at this sleepover stuff, either.”

She winked at him. “Play your cards right and there will be very little sleeping happening here tonight.”

He feigned dismay. “In that case, I need that pizza.”

Jeanette sat up and reached for the box. “Stamina is definitely called for,” she said, taking a slice of the pizza before handing the rest over to him.

The pizza was stone-cold now, but it had definitely been worth the wait.

Mary Vaughn was having yet another dinner with Sonny tonight, but this time it had been his idea. She had no idea what had sparked the invitation, but she was looking forward to it. Maybe she’d actually get up the nerve to put her feelings on the line just as Jeanette had suggested. She’d have to play that by ear after she found out what was on Sonny’s mind. It surely couldn’t be Christmas, because they’d gone over their plans for the holidays so thoroughly that not one single detail was left that hadn’t been nailed down.

Of course, maybe he was planning to tell her that he’d gotten seriously involved with that other woman, the one from the dealership. Maybe he’d even insist on including her in all of their holiday plans. The thought made her jittery.

She studied him across the table. He was still a goodlooking man, no doubt about it. And she’d finally realized that men like Sonny Lewis only came along once in a blue moon. If only she’d realized that before the divorce. Well, maybe it wasn’t too late. The only way to find out was to lay her cards on the table. The wicked twinkle in his eyes when he looked at her gave her courage.

“Sonny, I’ve been wondering about something,” she began slowly, searching for exactly the right approach.

“You have?”

Her words, usually so glib, had to be carefully thought out if this was going to turn out the way she wanted it to.

“Have you ever regretted…” Her voice faltered. “I mean, do you think we were too hasty when we got divorced?”

He stared at her, his mouth agape, his fork poised with a piece of steak on the tip. “Say that again.”

“You heard me,” she said with a touch of impatience.

“Was our divorce a mistake?”

“No,” he said with such absolute finality that she blanched.

“Oh, okay.” She could feel a humiliating blush creep up her neck. “I was just wondering.” She took a bite of her now-tasteless meal and murmured, “The steak is good, isn’t it?”

He regarded her with exasperation. “I don’t want to talk about the damn steak. Why would you ask such a thing now?” he inquired.

“I shouldn’t have,” she said quickly. “Forget I mentioned it.”

He acted as if she hadn’t spoken. “You never bothered to question me years ago when I told you I wanted a divorce,” he reminded her. “You acted as if you’d been expecting it.”

Mary Vaughn bit back a sigh. She’d opened this can of worms. Now she had to deal with it. “I suppose I had been,”

she admitted. “I was never good enough for you. I always thought you’d figure that out sooner or later.”

“Hogwash!” he said. “Mary Vaughn, you were never lacking in self-esteem, though God knows you had reason enough to, given your background. Growing up the way you did would have shattered someone without your strength.”

“If you admired me so much, why did you leave?”

“You know the answer to that, but I’ll explain it again if you want me to. Before I do, though, I want you to tell me why you’re bringing this up now. Did you just wake up this morning and decide to go digging around in the past to stir things up?”

She didn’t want to answer, didn’t want to risk further embarrassment, but he was studying her with genuine curiosity, so she replied, “It wasn’t like that. We’ve been getting along really well lately, you know, enjoying each other’s company. We have all this history in common, and a daughter. It made me think. It seemed maybe we let it all slip away too easily.”

He nodded. “Yep, you did exactly that.”

She regarded him with astonishment. “Me? I’m not the one who asked for a divorce.”

“No, but you didn’t say no. You barely even blinked, then offered to help me pack my things.”

She was confused by his reaction. “Did you want me to try to stop you?”

“I was hoping for exactly that, as a matter of fact. I was hoping you’d wake up and take a good long look at me and really see me for the first time, maybe appreciate the life we had. I always knew you loved Ronnie, but I loved you enough to overlook that. I thought I loved you enough to give us a real chance at happiness, but the truth was, after a few years when nothing changed, I got tired of being second best. I knew as long as I stayed I was going to have to swallow my pride and pretend it didn’t matter. I couldn’t do that any longer.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, seeing their life from his perspective for the first time. It wasn’t as if she’d ever cheated on him, but she hadn’t given him her heart. She’d been content, if not happy, with the way things were and thought he had been, too. How had she lied to herself for so long?

“I am so very sorry.”

“Me, too.”

“I’d like to try to change that, if you’ll let me,” she said, taking on the risk of another humiliating rejection. “I’m not saying we should jump into anything, just keep seeing each other, see if we can have a fresh start. If it’ll help, I know I was a fool back then.”

Sonny’s expression wasn’t encouraging. “I don’t know, Mary Vaughn. It’s taken me a long time to get over you. I don’t know that I want to get back on that emotional roller coaster.”

“Not back to anything,” she insisted. “Forward, to something new. Build on what was good about the two of us and not repeat the rest.”

He looked skeptical. “It’s not that easy to forget about the past.”

“No, of course not. In fact, it’s important to remember, so we won’t repeat it.” She met his gaze and did something she’d vowed never to do. She begged for this chance she didn’t deserve, but wanted desperately. “Please, Sonny. All I’m asking for is another chance. Let me prove I’ve changed, that I can love you the way you ought to be loved. I think I’m finally mature enough to appreciate the man you are, the man you’ve always been.”

“I don’t know,” he said, regarding her with wariness.

“Are you hesitating because you’re seeing someone else?”

“Dammit, it’s not about anyone else, Mary Vaughn. You’ve always been the only woman for me, more’s the pity.”

She covered his hand with hers. “Then take this chance,”

she said, then added simply, “Please.”

He turned her hand over, twined his fingers through hers, staring at their interlocked fingers, then at her with a troubled expression. “It would have to be different this time,” he said quietly.

She seized on the tiny opening. “It will be. I promise.”

“Let me finish,” he said. “I won’t settle again, Mary Vaughn. I just won’t do it.”

With that simple declaration, that refusal to settle for anything less than what he deserved, he won not only her respect, but the heart she’d once withheld from him. Unfortunately, with so many mistakes behind them—

most of them hers—proving that she loved him with all her heart wasn’t going to be easy. Fortunately, years of clawing and scratching to get what she wanted had made her tough. She would win him back. She was as sure of that as she was that the battle would be worth it.