Read What I've Done Online

Authors: Jen Naumann

What I've Done (22 page)

Eli glances at me briefly, his eyes filled with question, but he shakes his head and turns back to Gabe. “It doesn’t matter. It may not be safe for her. Don’t do this to her.”

I pull on his arm when my own anger boils to the top. “I’m right here, Eli. Don’t talk about me like I’m not standing right next to you. This is what I want—a chance to see my father again. Why didn’t you tell me this may actually be possible? You said you have to be a pure angel, but you didn’t know that for sure, did you?”

He takes a step closer to me, balling his hands into large fists at his sides with frustration.

“Because it’s dangerous. I’m not going to let you risk your life doing something like this. A half-human has never attempted to do this before, Lily, and I don’t know what the consequences will be. If nothing else, I have a feeling it would anger the elders and that is not a chance I want to take.”

“Why don’t you tell her what all of this is really about, Elijah?” Gabe says. “Tell her why it is you want her so badly to choose you and why you would give your life for her. Tell her about the future that you have seen for her. It’s the reason you and I are here right now, isn’t it?”

Frowning at both of them, I wonder what they could possibly be talking about now. It had been enough to learn that they are angels and I was part-angel, but Gabe makes it sound like there is something even bigger at play. Maybe this is the big secret I know Eli has been keeping from me.

Impatiently, I cross my arms firmly in front of my chest and wait for Eli to explain. But not to my surprise, Eli hangs his head in defeat and refuses to meet my gaze. His eyes close for a moment and he sighs, his chest rising with the deep breath.

“I can’t.” His eyes flip back open to settle on Gabe.

Gabe wraps an arm around me. “Well I can.” He spins me around to face him, his eyes gentle and comforting.

“Gabriel!” Eli shouts in warning, but we both ignore him.

I take a deep breath in anticipation of the secret Eli has been too afraid to tell me. Gabe almost appears to be amused as he looks into my eyes. We all know he is enjoying every minute of telling me something Eli refuses to.

“Lily, you will eventually be one of the strongest half-angels that ever lived, not to mention one of the very few females that have made it to adulthood. In the future you will have a baby with a full angel. That child could potentially have the power to control all angels. He would have the ability to forever live on both earth and the realm of angels, becoming virtually unstoppable.”

I feel the earth moving under me as I am hit with a sea of overwhelming thoughts.

My
child
?

It has been all of twelve hours since I became an adult. I have absolutely no desire to bear a child with anyone—maybe not ever. Being homeless with no money and a little sister that I struggle daily to keep safe is hard enough. Something major would have to change before I would ever wish for such a thing. Surely this future they have seen for me is wrong. Even if I did want a baby one day, is Gabe trying to tell me my child would be a one-of-a-kind half-angel with the power to change life as we know it?

My eyes drift between the two angels, hoping for some kind of refuge from either one of them, but they only stand and look back at me in sullen silence. Gabe appears pleased that someone has finally told me and Eli looks to be horrified that I have learned of the brutal truth he had been unable to tell me of.

After a long minute passes, Eli takes a step forward and says my name, wanting to comfort me. Gabe darts out between us with intent of sheer malice plastered all over his face. They are literally at each other’s throats so fast the half human in me doesn’t even see it happen right away. I don’t know if angels can actually hurt each other or not, so I scream for them to stop, pulling on Eli’s arm.

I watch in horror as they continue to scuffle together, their violent arms pushing each other around. Neither one of them seems to feel any pain from the punches thrown, but they both have determination in their eyes that is unmistakable.

Gabe pushes Eli to the ground and they begin rolling around for the top position. I look for anyone that could possibly help me stop them, but we are still alone behind the building. Any human that saw their quarrel with unusual speed may be freaked out, anyway, and for all I know it is some major violation for angels to be seen by humans when using their abilities.

“Please!” I cry out. “Stop this, both of you!”

I try reaching in between them again to pull on Gabe this time. A stray arm from the battle flashes out so briskly that I can’t even see who it belongs to, and strikes me right in the forehead. A sharp pain radiates throughout my skull and in a few short seconds the daylight surrounding me begins to fade away.

 

* * *

 

I wake to a set of slender hands pressing something cold against the back of my head. When I look up to see the blurry outline of a woman smiling down at me, I thrust myself up against the wall behind me faster than would be visible to the human eye. I am both shocked and horrified that I was able to do something like that without even trying.

The woman holds her hands up high in a peaceful gesture and I hear a familiar laugh.

“Whoa, you are fast! I’m not going to hurt you,
Kuuipo
.”

My eyes blink rapidly until I can see it is Kalia sitting beside me. I am on the couch in the back of her shop, surrounded by the out dated surf boards and stacks of old magazines that Kalia is too sentimental to throw away.

Kalia is wearing an elegant, flowing Hawaiian-print dress in bright colors with spaghetti-straps that tie over her lovely shoulders. It is more clothing that I have ever seen her wear in the time I have known her. She looks radiant with her hair pulled into a tight bun at the base of her neck and shimmering makeup applied to her eyes and face. My heart soars at the sight of her, even though she doesn’t totally look like her usual self.

She watches me with care. “I was afraid we were going to have to take you to a hospital if you didn’t wake soon. You were pretty out of it.”

Leaning away from the wall and slipping back onto the seat of the couch, I use great care when rubbing the back of my head. An egg-sized bump has formed from my fall in the school yard.

I inhale and exhale deeply. “How did I get here? What time is it?”

Kalia frowns and gives me the towel she is holding. ”You need to take it easy. You cracked your head pretty good and you’re going to have a bit of a headache. Eli left you here, knowing you would be okay. You have a couple hours yet before your court hearing.”

The towel is cold with a few nuggets of ice wrapped inside so I hold it against the bump. The sharp sting of the ice against my wound causes me to wince, but only for only a moment.

“Is Eli okay?” I ask.

Kalia’s light, musical laugh sounds as pleasant as ever to hear. “I think the better question is are you okay?”

The pain in my head seems to bang more furiously. “My head hurts something awful.”

“Getting knocked out by a couple of dueling angels is not something I would want to try.” Her eyes sparkle with the surprising revelation that she is in the know.

“Are you-?” I gasp, only to be interrupted by her musical laughter again.

Her face lights with pure amusement at my question. “You’re going to flatter me by asking if I am an angel?”

She is extremely stunning and seems to have a connection with Gabe that goes farther than what they were letting on, so I am not sure. I have had my suspicions since learning the truth but was too afraid to ask her, in case I was wrong.

“I have been told some pretty whacked out things in the past few days,” I tell her. “I don’t think it would be too hard for me to believe right now if you told me you are a fairy.”

“Well that’s a relief. I was afraid we were going to have to do the whole ‘clap your hands if you believe in fairies’ scenario if you didn’t think I was real.”

My eyes grow wider. “What? You’re like a real fairy?”

She throws back her head and a peal of laughter comes out before I realize she was only playing with me. “Of course not! How hard did you hit that head of yours?”

“Very funny,” I mumble, admittedly a little amused, in spite of myself.

I am beginning to believe all the stories I was told as a little girl could be real. It is hard to know when to open my mind up even further with everything I have learned. The new reality and life as I thought it to be feel like they are beginning to blur together to form something new.

Kalia regains her composure and smiles pleasantly. “Actually, I was an angel, once upon a time.”

My breath catches in my chest. What little I know about angels, I at least do know what this means. “You fell for a human?”

Eli hadn’t told me if there were other ways an angel could actually “fall,” so I am only assuming that is what happened, even though I know Kalia is not married and lives alone. But she nods in response, her graceful dark hair falling around her tanned shoulders. She looks down for a moment with an unparalleled sadness.

“He was the most beautiful human I had ever seen, and he was so kind. It didn’t take very long for us to fall in love.”

I realize she speaks of him in past tense. “Did something happen to him?”

She nods again, her eyes flickering away from me as she speaks. “We were together a very short time before he died in a surfing accident.”

How could something so unfair happen when she had made such a monumental sacrifice? Although shocked by her disclosure, I am able to see my friend in an entirely new light. Eli had said the love an angel feels for their human is beyond profound and my mother had not been strong enough to survive losing that love. I imagine Kalia is still suffering tremendously from the loss of hers.

My heart hurts for her on so many levels. “I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you.”

Her bright smile returns as she faces me again, although her eyes are still reflecting an inner sadness. “I know I’ll see him again, one day.” All at once I know the flirting I have seen her do with customers has never been anything other than that – innocent flirting. She knows she has lost the love of her life and holds on to the hope of seeing him again.

I push myself to the edge of the couch so I am sitting straight across from her, but a sharp pain encompasses my skull, causing me to yell out in pain. Kalia helps me lay back down carefully, placing her hand on my forehead.

“You need to just hang out for a little while until you’re feeling better.”

I shut my eyes as the shooting pain passes through. “Did Eli say if he was coming back?”

From the sympathetic look she gives me without skipping a beat, I already know she has been informed of everything that happened. “He wanted to give you some time to process everything.”

“Those two are able to move faster than a speeding bullet but yet they can’t catch me when I am knocked down?” I am surprised and even a little miffed that no one caught me on my way down.

Her bright eyes sparkle with amusement. “I don’t think either one of them was expecting it. Besides, you are also able to move at a quick speed now that you are an adult, like you did just now.”

“What they told me…” I sigh, not knowing how to verbalize all the fears, worries and questions that are going through my head about the whole baby thing.

“I’m guessing it was a lot for you to absorb.” She smiles kindly, brushing a stray strand of hair away from my face. “This angel business is quite often too much for humans to process. That’s why we tried to keep the truth from you, Lily. It’s not something you can usually just tell someone up front. Gabe wanted you to trust him first, so you would be a bit more open to what he had to say.”

“The whole ‘angel of darkness versus guardian angel’ thing is probably what freaks me out the most about all of this. Essentially we are talking evil versus good, right? Are you an angel of darkness like Gabe?”

Kalia begins adamantly shaking her head while I am still talking. “It’s not quite that black and white, Lily. Both kinds of angels are necessary for humans to continue living the way they do. And the two aren’t even naturally enemies. They continue to exist together, usually keeping their boundaries drawn. An angel of darkness isn’t always evil and a guardian angel doesn’t always do what is right for the human they have been sent to protect. An angel of darkness such as Gabe does things that are strictly forbidden by the elders.”

Chills seep up my spine as she speaks. Is she basically confirming that Eli doesn’t necessarily love me, just as I feared? Is he more concerned about what is right for the angel population? Was he only after me for his own interests? Now that I know both of them are hoping for the chance to have a child with me, I am beginning to think my only way out is to take Rose and run away.

Kalia watches me carefully. “You have to realize that they both want you to choose them, Lily. There are not any special rules on something like this that say what they can and can’t do to get you to want to be with them, although part of what makes Eli good is that he follows a certain set of general rules that angels are meant to follow.”

“Eli told me if he decided to fall for me and live as a human, Gabe would most likely interfere so we couldn’t be together. Is that true? Would something like that be possible? Can angels physically harm a human being?”

I want to continue by asking “or was that just a story so Eli would still have a chance at being the father of my child?” But the words going through my head are enough to make me sick the way it is. I can’t stand to hear them out loud and said to another person.

Kalia seems surprised by my questions. “Eli said he’d fall for you?”

“Is that so hard to believe?” I frown in my own defense, but she shakes her head.

“No, it’s just…not always common for angels to become romantically involved with their human. He must really love you. I guess after watching over someone you sometimes feel this unexplainable connection to them, and sometimes it grows into something more, although not always.”

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