When I Love (Vassi & Seri 3: Russian Stepbrother Romance) (7 page)

D
aniela tossed
him the keys when they got to the hotel’s basement parking. “Your turn to drive.”

Vassi caught it without a word and after pressing the unlock button, he wordlessly opened the passenger door for her.

As she got in, Daniela blew him a kiss. “Thank you.”

He closed the door shut.

Fuck.

How the hell had his world turned upside down in less than a day?

When Vassi got inside the driver’s seat and started Daniela’s car, she told him with a giggle, “This is kind of exciting.”

“Is it?”

“Sneaking around, making sure no paparazzi sees us,” she said ruefully, “With Andrew, it felt sordid, but with you – it’s like an adventure.”

He didn’t answer, but she didn’t seem to mind as Daniela only smiled at him, saying, “That reminds me. Have I told you how handsome you are?”

You have,
Vassi thought as he drove out of the basement. Six times in the past five minutes, and he
was
counting every instance not because he was egotistical but because it was almost like a total stranger had taken over Daniela’s body. From a colleague who had been mildly entertaining, she had somehow transformed overnight into an incomprehensibly clingy woman who didn’t know when to shut up.

She chatted almost nonstop throughout the ride, but Vassi nonetheless bided his time. When she finally paused for breath, he said right away, “We need to talk about last night.”

Daniela squeezed his arm, saying teasingly, “You were great, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

No. It wasn’t. What did worry the hell out of him was the fact that he remembered nothing at all, and he couldn’t remember being this wasted since the night Seri turned eighteen and he had forced himself to hurt her.

Daniela peered at him. “What
do
you want to talk about?”

Good question, and one he could answer better if he could just remember the most salient facts.

His fingers tightening around the shift stick, Vassi tried to recall what he could of yesterday’s events. The time he spent at work was clear enough.

But after that---

He remembered calling his driver to let him know he was no longer needed, remembered getting inside Daniela’s car. He remembered the two of them talking, and when they realized that they could be putting his own family in danger by taking her home with him, they had mutually decided that it was better for her to check in at a hotel instead.

He remembered having dinner in her suite, followed by drinks---

And then nothing.

His lips tightened.

Daniela’s smile faded at the look on his face. “What is it?”

He said tautly, “I don’t remember anything happening between us.” Daniela fell silent, and he cursed under his breath. “I know that came out wrong, and---”

“
Vassi.
I’m five-foot-five, and I weigh one hundred and ten. Do you really think I could have carried you all the way to the bedroom and have my wicked way with you?”

Vassi had no answer to that.

“We had some drinks last night, and
clearly
it was more than what was right for you, if you can’t remember anything that happened---” She broke off all of a sudden, and when he saw hurt flashing in her eyes, he knew he only had himself to blame.

“I’m sorry,” he forced himself to say. “None of this is your fault---”

She said in a small voice, “I didn’t ever think it was.”

He stilled.

“I’ve always liked you, Vassi. I just didn’t let you know because I thought I never had a chance, and it’s why I keep dating bad boys. I was trying to look for someone like you.”

Vassi forced his face to stay expressionless even as her words made him feel sick inside.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Looking at her now, he knew every word she spoke was true, just as he knew that all these years, he had only deliberately blinded himself to it.

“Last night…
you kissed me,
and it was the happiest moment of my life.”

Fuck.

She raised her gaze to his, saying sadly, “But it’s not the same for you, is it? You still love Seri, don’t you?”

“No.”

“Vassi, it’s just the two of us in the car. There’s no need to lie.” Her voice shook as she said, “You don’t love me. You can’t because it’s Seri you love
---
”

“
Daniela
.” She was right. It was just the two of them in the car, and seeing how much it had cost Daniela to say the words, guilt made Vassi say, “It’s not what you think.” Inhaling sharply, he forced himself to continue, saying, “You’re right. I
don’t
love you. But I don’t love her either.”

“I don’t believe you---”

“Have I ever lied to you?”

Her gaze turned uncertain. “No.”

“Then believe me when I say
I don’t love her.
I might have thought I had, but I no longer do.”

“But I’ve seen the way you stare at her when you think she’s not looking---”

“If you’ve seen me staring at her,” he grated out, “it was because I couldn’t understand why I could fall for someone like her.
That’s all
.”

Daniela looked down. “I see.”

Vassi tightened his hands on the steering wheel. “I’m sorry I didn’t notice all these years, D.”

Lifting her gaze to meet his, she said with a strained smile, “T-that’s not your fault either.”

Silence reigned, tense and painful, for the remainder of the ride. When they made it to the hotel, Vassi went around to open the car door for her, but he was too late.

Daniela had already stepped out, and she was smiling brightly at him. “No need,” she told him with false cheer. “You never used to open doors for me before.”

Feeling even guiltier at the way she was obviously forcing herself, he said curtly, “Nothing happened between us then.”

She waited for him to finish signing the slip for valet service before muttering fiercely, “I just want you to stop giving me unnecessary hope.
Okay
?”

Ah.

He said with a sigh, “I’m sorry, D.” It was unlike him to commit one mistake after another.

As they walked inside the lobby, members of the media tried to rush towards them before being quickly held back by security.

He pulled her close to him immediately, not wanting Daniela accidentally jostled or shoved.

As she burrowed into his chest, he heard her say, “Can I ask a favor?”

“Another one?” he managed to say lightly as he led them towards the function hall where the press conference was being held.

“Don’t treat me differently.
Please.
I know you can’t ever love me, but we can at least stay friends, right?”

His arm around her shoulders tightened at the request. “Right.”

They entered the function hall through the back door then, and waiting production assistants immediately escorted them up the stage. The rest of the cast was already seated, together with the sound and art directors.

After pulling a chair for Daniela, he forced himself to turn to Seri and ruffled her hair, knowing it was what was expected of him. “Hey.”

Seri managed a smile. “Hey.”

She tried not to think about the fact that Vassi and the other girl had arrived together –
again.

Inching forward, she looked past Vassi to smile at Daniela. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

She blinked at Daniela’s strained smile. Was something wrong? She immediately looked at Vassi, but he kept his gaze straight ahead, deliberately ignoring her.

Slowly, she turned her gaze back to the crowd as well. Had the two of them fought?

Almost half an hour passed before the press conference began, and it couldn’t have come earlier for Seri. Those thirty minutes had been the worst, with Seri unable to stop listening to the way Vassi and Daniela continued with their cute and witty banter.

The first part of the conference involved a short introduction from the two directors followed by a ten-minute Q & A for each member of the cast. The third part of the conference allowed the press to ask questions of the cast as an ensemble, and the first one had everyone either smiling or hooting outright.

“Any real-life romance between any cast members?”

Everyone, including Seri, although it was taking everything for her to continue smiling.

Vassi did his best not to react at the question. Beside him, he sensed more than saw Daniela stiffen, and he reached for her hand without hesitation. He squeezed her fingers, telling her without words that he wouldn’t do anything to embarrass her.

“I think you should ask our dear Daniela about that,” Malinda was saying. “Right…
D
?” The other actors grinned at her deliberate use of Vassi’s nickname for Daniela.

The moderator turned to Daniela with a grin. “Well, Ms. Martin?”

“I’m…” Daniela’s voice faltered and she turned towards him helplessly.

Without missing a beat, Vassi said, “In one of our rehearsals, Malinda says I’m every girl’s type---”

The girls in the crowd cheered.

“So as far as romances go,” he drawled, “I think every girl in the cast, with the exception of my sister, is in love with me.” He looked at Malinda. “And that includes you, Malinda, even if you won’t admit it.”

Malinda only rolled her eyes even as the crowd of reporters laughed.

The questions continued, with one reporter asking the inevitable question about how awkward it was for Vassi and Seri to play lovers when they were siblings in real life.

Vassi answered first. “Work is work, and it makes no difference to us.”

Seri shook her head at the crowd. “To be honest, my only complaint is that I have to spend even
more
time with the most arrogant guy in the world.” She turned to face Vassi to smirk at him---

Or at least that was what she wanted to do until she saw Vassi holding Daniela’s hand under the table.

She quickly faced the crowd, saying brightly, “Other than that, it’s not a problem.” The reporter next in line came forward, his question about voice acting techniques, but Seri barely heard him at all.

Right now, there was only one thing she could think about.

Vassi was holding Daniela’s hand in secret.

“And Ms. Devereaux? Any tips you wish to share about voice acting?”

She heard herself answer, feeling all the while that the words were coming from someone else’s mouth.

Vassi was holding Daniela’s hand in secret.

She couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Vassi was holding Daniela’s hand in secret.

Did it mean he was starting to fall for the other girl? Did it mean he would start being indifferent to her? Did it mean---

Vassi was holding Daniela’s hand in secret.

“And now,” the moderator said excitedly, “it’s time to unveil the trailer. Without further ado---”

Vassi was holding Daniela’s hand in secret.

“Here’s the world premiere for Drawn!”

All the lights in the function room went out.

And without even thinking, Seri reached for Vassi’s dick under the table.

Vassi stiffened.

Swallowing, Seri leaned towards him, pretending to accidentally brush her breasts against the side of his arm. Squeezing his dick, she whispered, “It’s me.” Even though it stung her pride to have to say the words, what would be even more unbearable was Vassi mistaking her touch for Daniela’s.

Vassi said under his breath, “I know.” Never in his wildest dreams had he thought Seri could ever do something like this, and if it had been any other time, he would have been damn glad about it.

But things were different now.

It wasn’t just his family who would be hurt. There was Daniela, too, who even now was on the verge of breaking down – and if she did, he would only have himself to blame.

Seri’s heart started to beat hard when Vassi’s hand suddenly covered hers---

Only to shatter into pieces when she felt Vassi firmly remove her fingers from his body.

The trailer ended, and the lights switched back on.

Thunderous applause filled the function hall, and when KC, the young
mangaka
, burst into tears as she threw herself in her Russian-Japanese boyfriend’s arms, people began to sniff and dab at their eyes.

Seri turned to Vassi, knowing she had to explain---

But then she saw it.

He was still holding Daniela’s hand.

She stumbled back.

The tears started to fall, but because everyone around her was crying happy tears, no one gave her a second look.

He was still holding Daniela’s hand.

She cried harder.

Vassi had made his choice, and he couldn’t have made it any more unequivocally clearer than that.

V
assi whitened
as he watched Seri mumble an incoherent excuse before rushing off the stage. Letting go of Daniela’s hand, he said unevenly, “I’m sorry. I must go.” He didn’t wait for an answer, but instead turned swiftly around to go after Seri.

His mind warned him against playing the fool again, but he ignored it. This time, he only allowed himself to listen to his instincts, and his guts were telling him that Seri was in pain.

As he reached the end of the stairs, he caught sight of Seri going through the function hall’s back doors. He started to call out for her, but a couple of photographers suddenly blocked his way.

Fuck.

He forced a smile, allowing them a few seconds to take his photos. After, he gestured for his security to come forward, and they surrounded him this time, preventing any other member of the press from approaching him.

“Keep them away from me,” he muttered under his breath.

“Yes.”

Pushing the back doors open, Vassi immediately scanned the hotel’s VIP lobby and found Seri standing a short distance from the entrance of the hotel’s coffee shop.

He slowed down, his gaze narrowing at the way she was standing so still.

A moment later, and several people came out of the coffee shop, and Vassi stopped moving as well. Now he knew why Seri had been frozen in her place.

It was his family emerging from the shop – his older brothers, Sergei and Misha, together with Fyodor.

Vassi swore under his breath. He had invited the three of them to the press conference a week ago. Back then, he had still been harboring the hope that things could go back the way they used to be.

Before he could speak, he heard Seri say throatily, “Hello, boys.” He watched her blow kisses at each one. “Did you miss me?”

Sergei and Misha’s faces remained unreadable.

Fyodor, however, turned white. Turning sharply away from Seri, he told his sons harshly, “If I find out either of you contacts her again for any reason – you might as well forget I’m your father.”

Without waiting for their replies, he stalked out of the lobby.

Seri pouted. “Papa still hates me.” Her slim shoulders moving in a dismissive shrug, she said carelessly, “But oh well. He’s already old, so he can be forgiven.” She blew the two kisses, saying, “I guess this is the last time I’ll see you two, so goodbye.”

Spinning away, she flounced off to the elevators.

Still unnoticed, Vassi watched her press the up button, and that was when he saw her hands shaking hard.

Ah.

He turned towards his brothers, but they were already gone.

What now?

He watched Seri enter the elevator, and when the doors closed, he made his decision. Using the other elevator, he pressed the button for the fifth floor, knowing that there could only be one place in this hotel that could guarantee privacy for her.

Arriving at his floor, Vassi tapped his card key on the scanner and the door automatically opened. Since the company considered him and Seri as natural siblings, it had reserved adjoining suites for them to serve as dressing rooms.

Entering his suite, he went straight to the connecting door and pressed his ear to the door.

Ah.

Seri was weeping.

Vassi sank on the chair nearest to him.

The sound of her tears made him ache. He wanted so badly to go to her. But at the same time – it gave him hope.

If she really didn’t care about any of them---

If all she cared about was the money---

She wouldn’t be crying this hard, wouldn’t be weeping like the pain driving her to tears was inconsolable.

As he listened to her heartbreaking sobs, Vassi took his phone out and called Fyodor.

“Vassi---”

He interrupted his father, saying hoarsely, “I’m sorry, Papa.”

Fyodor fell silent.

“All my life, I vowed to be a good son, to find a way to be someone who’s deserving of your love---”

Fyodor said fiercely, “You never had to earn it, Vassi.”

He closed his eyes. “I know that, Papa. I thank you for it. I love you for it.” He swallowed. “But I’m done lying to myself – I’m done lying to you. We all deserve the truth, and the truth is---”

“Don’t say it, son,” his father said hoarsely.

“I have to.” His hold on the phone tightened. “You mean the world to me, Papa…but so does she. So does Seri, and I love her---”

“Goddammit, Vassi.”

“I have always loved her – the way a man loves a woman. I never saw her as a sister---”

“Can you goddamn hear yourself, Vassi?” Fyodor raged. “Do you know what you’re goddamn saying---”

He said flatly, “I do.”

In the opposite room, Seri’s sobs hadn’t stopped, hadn’t even softened, and her pain hurt and strengthened him at the same time.

“I love you both equally, and I would not hesitate to give up my life for either of you.”

“Think about what you’re saying,” Fyodor said wearily. “Just
think,
Vassi. She’s your
sister---
”

“She’s not.”

“She tried coming on to me, dammit---”

He said fiercely, “She did it for me.”

And as soon as the words left him, Vassi knew it was true, and it was like having the burden of the whole world lifted from his shoulders.

“She did it for me,” he repeated, “and I just wish I had known it was so from the start.”

“Don’t let her fool you---”

“The only time she tried to fool you and me, Papa, was when she wanted us to believe she was something she wasn’t.” His voice became raw. “Think about it, Papa. This is
Seri – our Seri –
we’re talking about. We all had a hand raising her, and you know – I know you know – you know how sweet she was, how innocent and loving. Do you really think---”

“I know you don’t want to see it,” Fyodor gritted out, “but she’s lying. Her whole life she’s been lying---”

“Papa.”

Fyodor fell silent.

“I won’t try to convince you to believe me. It’s your choice. But just know – if I have to choose, I will always choose her. And I know it’s a long shot, but I hope – I hope you choose her, too, given the chance.”

He ended the call.

He listened to the sobs coming from the room.

I’m sorry, leech.

I should have trusted you more.

Rising slowly to his feet and feeling like an old man every second, Vassi made his way to the connecting door and carefully turned the knob. The door swung open noiselessly, and he entered the suite.

Seri was on her knees, her back to him, her shoulders shaking hard.

He stepped forward. “Seri.”

Almost falling out of balance as she spun around, Seri could only shake her head dazedly when she saw Vassi inside her suite. “V-Vassi? How did you – what are you---” But then she noticed the connecting door next to him, and as the answer became clear to her, her lips twisted. “Adjoining suites for stepsiblings who fuck?”

“Yes.”

She flinched.

“Seri---”

She shook her head. “I’m not in the mood to talk.”

“If this is about Daniela---”

She laughed humorlessly. “No, Vassi.” Wiping her eyes, she whispered painfully, “I almost wish this is about her, but it’s not.” Forcing herself to get back on her feet, she carefully averted her gaze from him, saying pointedly, “I’d appreciate it if you leave now.”

“I will – as soon as you give me the answers I need.” He came to stand in front of her.

She turned her face away. “I don’t---” Hands suddenly cupped her face, and she gasped as Vassi forcibly made her look at him.

“Why were you crying?”

Ah.

She squeezed her eyes shut. When had she become so weak that just hearing Vassi ask something so simple was enough to break her?

“Tell me.”

She shook her head. “It d-doesn’t matter.”

“But it does – if it’s because of what happened at the lobby.”

Her head jerked up, her stunned gaze meeting his.

He answered the unspoken question in her eyes, saying quietly, “Yes. I saw what happened. I saw everything. The way you made it so damn clear to them that you’ve changed---”

Tears of humiliation stung her eyes.

“But more than that, I also saw the way you were crying just now.”

She whitened.

“And it doesn’t make any fucking sense. Why would you cry like that over people you don’t really care about?” His voice turned savage, and he demanded, “Why would you cry like your fucking heart’s breaking when you already have Plan Fucking B in the bag---”

She managed to wrench away from him, crying out, “Stop it!” She was so, so tired of having her lies constantly thrown at her.

Grabbing her shoulders, Vassi snarled down at her, “Why should I stop? Can’t you handle the truth of what you’ve done? Is that why you’re crying? You feel fucking guilty about my father going to pieces---”

“Shut up!” She let out a cry of despair.

“You want to know how he can only sleep when he’s drunk or taken pills---”

“Noooo---”

“It’s all because you destroyed him.”

“Stop it---”

“You won, Seri. Are you happy now---”

She slapped him, sobbing, “No. NO. NO!” She could no longer see him through her tears, but it didn’t really matter because right now all she could see was Fyodor---

Papa.

Sobs broke out of her, tearing her apart.

“I d-don’t want him broken,” she wept. “I n-never wanted that, and I don’t know what to do---”

Hands clasped her face, and she found herself looking up at Vassi.

He was smiling down at her, and it was…real.

His smile was…real.

“Ya znayu.”

She could only stare at him, unable to believe what she was hearing.
He…knew?

His head lowered.

And again, he whispered, “Ya znayu.” But this time, Vassi’s own voice broke. “I know now, Seri. I understand.”

And this time, she understood as well.

Oh God.

“I’m sorry it took me a long time to understand,” Vassi said hoarsely, “but I know now. I know you did it all for me.”

When she realized what he was saying---

When she realized that he truly did know---

She couldn’t help it.

The tears just kept falling.

Relief and happiness filled her, and she could only look up at him, crying his name over and over. “Vassi. Vassi. Vassi.”

His arms closed around her like iron bands, and she didn’t mind at all. There was no other place she wanted to be.

“
You goddamn fool.
” His trembling lips touched her hair. “I love you,
solnishka moya
.”

She cried even harder because for so long she had thought she would never hear him call her that again. Throwing her arms around him, she whispered fiercely, “I love you. I love you. I love you.” She tightened her hold on him, a part of her feeling terrified that if she let go, he would disappear.

As if he had heard her thoughts, Vassi tipped her chin up and kissed her hard.

It was beautiful, so, so beautiful because it was yet another thing that she thought she could never feel again.

Pulling away, he said hoarsely, “No more tears,
solnishka moya
.”

She nodded, but still the tears fell.

Not wanting Seri to cry herself into a state of exhaustion, he lifted her up in his arms and carried her to the bedroom.

When he laid her on the bed, she clutched a fistful of his shirt, saying tremulously, “D-don’t go.”

He shook his hand. “I’m never going anywhere without you.” He lay next to her, saying rawly, “I promise.” She burrowed into him, and because he felt the same need for them to be connected, Vassi drew her as close as he could to him. “Sleep now, my love. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

She didn’t answer, only continued clutching him like she was still terrified he would disappear. But as time passed, her hold eventually slackened and he gradually heard her breathing ease.

Carefully pulling away, he peeled her cotton jacket off, wanting to make her sleep more comfortably. Her phone fell on the carpet as he placed the jacket on the table. Picking her iPhone up, Vassi saw one unread message.

It was from Max.

He hesitated only for a moment before reading the message.

Max:
How did the press conference go? I wish I could be there. I really do. See you tomorrow, and if you ever need some help to make you fall asleep again, I’m always at your service.

Vassi slid the phone back into one of the pockets of Seri’s jacket.

He turned to face Seri again, and his heart clenched.

He had thought the lies had finally ended, but now he no longer knew what was real.