When Lightning Strikes (Lightning Series Book 1) (15 page)

No anger. I don’t want to forget.

She took deep breaths, trying to calm herself. Her heart still raced, and she couldn’t focus on anything else.

Her parents knew.

“Girls?” Mr. Whitecap’s voice drifted from his room. “The bell rang a couple of minutes ago. What are you both doing out here?”

Julie blinked. The light behind him was fascinating, the solid beam coming from his science lab danced with tiny sparkles of dust. The teacher poked his head around the black classroom door. She focused her gaze on him, her features slack.

She had lost a few minutes again. What was she even talking to Kara about? She felt like hitting the wall.

“Oh, I see.” He bustled to the hallway and put a hand on each of their backs to guide them into his room. “Come on in and take your seats.”

Oh I see.
The words echoed though her mind. What did he see? Two of his students staring blankly in the hallway, like mental patients. Here that was normal. She shook her head. At her old school she would get a detention.

Julie took her seat. Her book bag was in its place, and she was comforted by the fact that her red notebook was there next to her. It was real. At least she thought it was real. She would have to check that it was in there after the test.

Mr. Whitecap passed out the test and went to the front of the room to sit back at his desk. He wasn’t all that concerned about what they were doing in the hallway. She watched as Kara put her name at the top of the test and started to read the first question.

Julie bubbled in a few answers. She didn’t care about any of her tests now. It didn’t matter, if they were all at a crazy school. Or what if there wasn’t a school at all and she was in a coma or dream or something? Maybe that was it. And not that she was crazy.

She pinched herself hard. Pain shot up her arm, and a red welt appeared. She bit her lip to stop from crying out.

Julie let out a hysterical giggle. She looked up and saw that all the eyes in the room faced her. The giggling turned into laughter. The laughter was out of control. In a minute she was afraid she might drool on herself since she couldn’t stop.

She put her hands up over her mouth, her eyes wide. The three boys, Kara, and the teacher all stared.

“Are you okay, Julie?” Mr. Whitecap came over to her seat. “Is the stress of finals getting to you?”

“No,” she gasped. “Yes.”

She kept laughing, and drool started to slide out of her slack mouth. She could not stop. “I think…I need…bathroom.” Tears streamed down her face.

“Yes, yes. Good idea.” Mr. Whitecap waved his hands at her, shooing her out the door. He kept reaching out like he wanted to help her and pulling his hands back, like a turtle pulling back into a shell. Clearly she was flustering him. She laughed more.

She laughed down the hallway to the sea green glass tiled bathroom. The doors to the two stalls behind her stood open. She was alone. Her laughter died to giggles and then to nothing, as she splashed some cold water on her face. She dried her face and looked in the mirror. She was pale. Her eyes were still red and swollen.

Julie stared at herself. If she was not going crazy, that meant everyone around her was being manipulated somehow. Or they were a part of it and were okay with it. The conversation her brother had with her parents on their birthday floated into her mind again. Her heart raced.

They knew.

She splashed more water on her face to shock away tears, staring into her own eyes in the mirror. Her face grew white, and her heart thudded. A cold wave traveled through her body, and her stomach lurched.

It had to be wrong. They couldn’t be a part of this. Julie banged her fist on the sink.

She was so tired and numb inside. A small dot of dirt on the bottom corner of the mirror had curious edges to it. Miniscule tendrils grew from it that looked like tiny snowflake arms. As she focused on it, her thoughts started to drift away.

What am I doing?
She splashed water on her face. The shock broke the spell and shook her out of her fear.

Was that what happened—something caught her eye and allowed whatever was going on to erase her thoughts, her feelings, and her memories? Maybe it was it more than anger. Maybe it was fear.

Maybe it was all emotions. How could she guard against that? She wasn’t an ice queen.

Julie looked into the mirror again. Her eyes were wide. The red veins shooting through the white made her irises a stark violet. Her hair was wet in some places and sticking out wildly in others. “I look crazy.”

A laugh bubbled through her lips, and she splashed water on herself before she started going hysterical again.

“Talking to yourself. Asking yourself if you are crazy. All says you are crazy. How can I prove otherwise? Think, Julie, think.”

She stared into the mirror for a few more minutes. She wasn’t exactly a scientist or anything so it wasn’t like she could experiment. She tapped her fingers on the edge of the sink.

The notebook. Her journal entry about the Academy had started this. How many times had she read it? She must have read it over and over again, blanking out. That was why she lost twenty–five minutes. Or she was starting to overcome whatever this was, because she knew about it.

Julie caught her reflection again. Her eyes looked huge.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

She could write everything down in the book. If an emotion triggered this, she could read about it later. But she couldn’t let anyone catch her, in case she really was crazy.

She splashed more water on her face and looked at herself in the mirror.

“I’m talking to my reflection in the girls’ bathroom. I believe that everyone around me is controlling my mind or controlling others, like Kara’s, and I believe that my brother and parents are aware of this. And I have no reason why any of this would be going on. It’s that, or I’m crazy. Maybe I would rather be crazy.”

Julie shook her head at herself. She wasn’t crazy. “I’ll prove it.”

She had to try to act normal, as if she didn’t suspect something was going on. Maybe they weren’t her family. She could be in danger. And if she was crazy, they might confine her more.

Either way, she was screwed if they caught on.

With a sick feeling she tried to keep tamped down, Julie headed back to the classroom and her test. Everyone stared at her as she walked in. Kara looked worried. She gave them a thumbs up sign, sat down in her chair, and started the test. After a few moments, she didn’t feel any eyes on her. Even the teacher was back to grading another class’s finals. She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

No one could read her thoughts. That wasn’t possible, right?

Julie read the second question and bubbled the answer after a few moments.

See, you can do this.
She could fake it. She would figure this out. She was not crazy.
You are not crazy.

You are not crazy.

The words bounced around in her head all day—when she went to the coffeehouse with Kara, after dinner, and when she was alone in her room that night writing everything down. The red notebook stayed clasped in her hands as she slept, and her dreams were quiet.

♦

Chapter 13: Faker

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J
ulie knew she was a good dancer, but she never knew she was a good actress. Surely her family would notice the shaking hands, the way she kept digging her fingertips into her thighs to stay calm, or the fact that she barely spoke. Yet no one said a word to her.

For once, she was having breakfast with them before school. Her brother was actually there too and not already at the mysterious other school. The three of them—her mom, dad, and brother—all talked about his finals and plans for the summer as if it were a normal day.

They have to know. Or were they like her and Kara? She had to find out.

She took another careful bite of cereal. Her stomach squeezed, and she hoped no one noticed as she gagged a little.

“All right, Jamie,” Lir said in a cheerful voice. “Let’s get going. You don’t want to be late for your test this morning.”

“You go to the car. I’m going to get my bag.” Her brother stood up, stretched, smiled at her, and came over to give her a quick hug. He didn’t seem to notice her stiffen. “Hey sis, maybe we can actually get some time together this summer.”

“Yeah,” she replied. “That would be great. We haven’t been able to spend much time together, going to different schools and all.”

His smile faltered. He nodded and turned to go. A moment later she heard him loping up the stairs behind her.

“Hey,” she said casually to her mom who was washing dishes at the sink. This seemed to be her preferred hangout whenever Julie was around—washing dishes with her back turned. “Do you think I could go to Jamie’s school next year? We would see each other more.”

Andromeda stilled. Julie heard a plate clatter to the bottom of the sink. Maybe picking on her mom wasn’t the right thing to do. She seemed a bit fragile.

“I thought you loved Muriel? Isn’t it better to go to a school that will develop your dancing?” Her mother stayed still.

“It’s not bad, but it isn’t the Academy.” Julie kept her eyes wide open and innocent but dug her fingernails into her legs. She wouldn’t think about what she was saying too much. The things coming out of her mouth were just sounds, and she was collecting other sounds. No reason to feel any emotion.

She would remember.

Her mom turned around. Her eyes were wide, and she twisted her wedding band. She looked worried. No, she looked scared.

“I wonder why I never heard from them at all. It’s weird that they attended my recital and didn’t send a letter. I guess I must not be as good at dancing as I thought. So I thought why not go be with Jamie next year? It is my last year in high school.”

Wow, that bullshit even sounded good to her.

Andromeda stood there twisting her ring. Finally her eyes brightened. “What about Kara? She’s your only friend here. You don’t want to leave her.”

“Actually, I was thinking about that.” Julie casually took another bite of cereal. It tasted like saw dust. She kept an eye through a veil of hair since her head was down to eat. “I’ll talk to Kara today to see if she wants to come with me too. She seems kind of bored with the fine arts school anyway. I think she misses some of the other kids that go to Jamie’s school. So we can go together.”

She forced a bright smile. It was her dancing smile, and she could force it out at will, even if it was the last thing she wanted to do at that moment.

Her mother rushed over to her, sitting down next to her and taking her hand. Her eyes were wild with worry now.

“Honey, you can’t go to Jamie’s school.”

“But why?” Julie was unable to stop her voice from raising higher.

“I can’t tell you. You can’t. Please don’t push this.”

She pulled her hand away, waving it with some real anger. She tried to keep her breath under control and push the emotion aside. “Why, Mom? Why?”

“Julie, it is a no.” Her ’eyes narrowed on Julie’s face, her expression sad but expectant.

She was waiting for her to go all spacey. She knew. Her mom knew.

Julie wasn’t sure how she managed it, but some inner sense of preservation made her slacken her features. That weird feeling that she got when she was dancing snapped into place. It smoothed out her emotions so she didn’t trigger a memory loss. She was relieved, like she was letting go of some of the pent up whatever crawling under her skin. She kept her eyes wide, hoping the air would dry the tears building up. She made herself focus on a point beyond her mother’s shoulder. The silver handle glinting against the dark wood cabinets was her lifeline.

Andromeda leaned over from the chair, pulling her into a hug. Julie tried hard not to stiffen or push her away. Her mom shook and whispered. “I’m sorry, baby.”

Maybe she didn’t know. She had always taken care of her. Julie opened her mouth to say something, to reassure her that she was fine. Then her mother whispered, “I know you won’t remember this, but I’m so sorry.”

Liar.

A tear fell from Julie’s eyes. Andromeda would never be the same to her again. They were fractured, like she was afraid her sanity might be.

♦

Chapter 14: Around the Island

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J
ulie had been looking forward to the last bit of the week after finals. But her sleep last night had been interrupted with tossing, turning, and intermittently waking up, tingling with longing for…something. Her dreams were becoming more vivid. She knew now she was dreaming about a man with blond hair and blue eyes, but his features were fuzzy. He made her lips tingle and her body warm all over.

To make things worse, she didn’t know how to act when she saw her family this morning. Even in her head she called her parents Lir and Andromeda now. They just weren’t ‘mom and dad’ anymore. She wished she still had the excuse of studying to hide in her room and take notes in the notebook—which was her friend and worst nightmare all wrapped up in a neat leather package.

But today she was determined to find some answers.

Everything in the last few days conspired to make her search easier. Kara’s family was leaving for a long summer vacation. Muriel was off teaching dance classes in New York. She missed them both, but because they were gone, the gym space was all hers for practice—the school had even loaned her a key on Muriel’s word—so she had an easy place to hide if she needed to get out of the house. If she wasn’t too freaked out to leave her room.

But she had a burning desire to go to the other side of the island and see the other school since her talk with Andromeda—it was what gave her the strength to leave her room. She needed answers. She knew she would find them there.

They didn’t want her going there. There had to be a reason.

Julie stood at the door to her room for at least ten minutes, hand on the door knob until her palm was sweaty. She turned the handle, her hand slipping on the smooth sliver knob. She took a deep breath, plastered her dance smile on her face, and went down the stairs.