Authors: Unknown
Chapter Twenty
“Welcome to Miami!!” Angela read the sign as we passed by. “The only city where it’s still warm enough for you to go to the beach, and once you get there, get naked!!,” she said as she waggled her eyebrows at me.
I chuckled. “I’m glad we are getting here first because I need you to help me come up with a plan to get Feliz and Amber to go with us!”
“Wait! You mean to tell me you asked them to come down here and you didn’t tell them why?!!” Angie’s eyes grew as big as saucers.
“Well, no, I didn’t give them
all
the specifics about the trip, but I told them the important things. You know, where we’re staying, that we’re celebrating your birthday and most importantly that it was my treat! Surely they won’t protest too much, right?” I glanced over at Angie skeptically.
“I guess we’ll find out soon enough,” Angie mumbled shaking her head. “For me, it doesn’t matter. I already know what I’ve signed up for... I think! The way things are going, I hope I haven’t signed up to be on duty during my vacation! Are you sure you are ok? Don’t feel like you have to power through this trip just for us. We are all adults and we can find plenty of things in Miami to occupy us without your assistance. If you need to go home, go,” Angie said in earnest. I could tell her nursing instincts were kicking in and she suspected that something definitely was not right and she thought my sickness was no coincidence as I’d said earlier, but I knew she wouldn’t dare argue the issue. A doctor is undoubtedly the worst patient with the best alternate diagnosis for any presented illness.
I reached over and tapped Angie on the arm. “Ange, I’m fine. Don’t you worry about me? I’m a big girl and I also happen to be a doctor! I know my limits and if I thought I was in any sort of danger or a risk to you or anyone else, please believe that I would take appropriate action!” Sure, I was off my game, but I wasn’t an invalid by any means. I determined in my mind that I wouldn’t show any other signs of being affected by whatever bug was trying to overtake me.
Get it together Erin! You have some things to make happen and everyone is following your lead!
My stomach turned in response to my mental challenge and I drowned its threat of involuntary upheaval with a swig of Pepto-Bismol.
Moments later we pulled into the hotel parking lot and although I felt weak and exhausted, I was still intent on mustering up my last ounce of exuberance to set the tone for the “girl’s trip” I’d orchestrated.
Angie and I checked in at the desk and went straight up to our suite, which was more like a small apartment. It was complete with a full kitchen, two bedrooms and a fold-out couch. There was a fifty inch flat screen television in the living room and flat screens in each bedroom, as well. The television in the living area had a DVD player set up and inside the media console there was a radio complete with CD player and an iPod port. “They have us set up to party in here!” I said with all the enthusiasm I could bolster. What I was really thinking was how sad it was that I wouldn’t be in the room long enough to veg out in front of the television with movies and junk food.
I will definitely get in some of that when I get home.
I made myself an internal promise.
We toted our bags into the bedroom and unpacked just enough for us to feel comfortable in the space. I laid out my outfit for the evening and set up some toiletries on the bathroom counter before coming back into the bedroom and sprawling out across the memory foam mattress. I knew it was a wrap the minute I felt my body sink into the padding as it enfolded around me. The damned bed was practically cradling me and I knew sleep was inevitable. “If you don’t mind, I’m gonna take a nap before the girls get here.” It was more of an announcement to the mattress than Angie.
“Girl, that’s fine. I was planning to go and break in that TV anyway. I wonder if they have a Red Box in this hotel or nearby. I could go for a movie and some popcorn or something else to eat! You’re not hungry? You haven’t had much other than the protein bar and breakfast. It’s almost six now. You want me to bring you something back? I think your blood sugar may be low.” Angie eyed me intently. I didn’t give her anything to work with. I nonchalantly replied, “I’m not really hungry but if you should come across a wing and fry basket while you’re out, please bring me one for later.” Before I finished my statement, I was tucking the pillow beneath my head and snuggling up to it like a lost lover.
“Ok Miss ‘I’m not hungry.’ I’ll see what I can do. See you in a bit.” Angie’s word waned as sleep seduced me into a dreamy euphoria.
*****
“Hey! Erin, wake up! I know you didn’t have us haul our asses down to Miami to watch you take a nap! Get up! It is Angie’s birthday weekend! We came to turn up so leave that bed turned down!” Feliz snatched the cover off of me and I forced one eyelid open as I struggled to come out of my sleepy stupor. I felt hung over as I turned over in the bed to look up at Feliz.
“You’re right.” I croaked. “I’m getting up now. Give me twenty minutes. Are you guys ready to roll?”
Please say no! Give me ten more minutes! Maybe I’m anemic?
I prayed silently for some additional sleep time and had already contemplated taking a nap in the bathroom as I waited for Feliz’s reply.
“No, we will be ready in about an hour. We just got here, but there isn’t a moment to lose on a Saturday night in Miami. Plus you know I have to help Amber get ready,” Feliz whispered.
I was about to thank God for the extra time when I glanced at the clock.
Have I really been asleep for two hours?!
It had felt like no more than a long blink and I was still exhausted. I lumbered out of bed and into the bathroom.
Maybe a hot shower will perk me up some. Then again, I could be suffering from heat exhaustion.
I was running through every possible cause for my sudden illness. I turned on the shower and sat on the toilet as I waited for the steam to fill the room. As the temperature rose, so did the contents of my stomach and I decided not to fight it any longer.
Maybe I’ll feel better if I just throw up.
My stomach began to wrench over and over until I was weak and covered in sweat. I was hopeful that no one could hear me over the shower.
The last thing I need is for Amber to be pussyfooting around me the whole trip.
Not to mention I didn’t want to be a Debbie Downer for the other girls. I stood slowly to my feet, turned down the temperature of the water until it was barely luke-warm and stepped in the shower. The water felt cool against my clammy skin and I felt my stomach begin to settle.
About five minutes later there was a knock on the door. Over the spray of the shower, I could faintly hear someone yelling something on the other side of the door.
“You alright in here,” Angie asked as she peeked in to survey the state of the bathroom. “You feeling any better?” Now she was studying my face. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and was relieved to find the color had returned to my cheeks.
“Yes, actually, I feel much better! Give me about ten minutes and I’ll be right out and we can get this party started!” I forced a grin as I pushed Angie out and quickly closed and locked the door. After drying off and slathering my body with lotion, I slid on the dark denim pair of skinny jeans and hot pink off-the-shoulder top I’d laid out to wear. I pulled my hair back into a tight bun—the only option in the humidity—and put my over-sized gold hoops in my ears. I slipped on a long gold necklace, added bronzer to my cheeks, forehead, nose and chin and dabbed a shiny pink gloss on my lips.
There, now I don’t look like walking death.
I cupped my hands beneath the faucet, took a few gulps of cool water and prayed it wasn’t a mistake.
The worst thing I can do for heat exhaustion is to become further dehydrated.
Thankfully, when the water hit my now empty stomach there was no rumble or upset.
When I finally came out of the bathroom, I was excited to see how fabulous my friends looked. Again Feliz didn’t disappoint with her black latex pants and her sleeveless top that hung so far down into her cleavage that Erin could almost see the top of her torso.
There has got to be some double-sided tape involved there!
Feliz had straightened Ambers golden mane and it hung seductively down the middle of her back. Her light-colored turquoise shirt seemed to be the exact opposite of Feliz’s. It was pretty much backless. Her tight skinny jeans enhanced her curves. She wore a pair of beveled, silver hoops and her make-up was flawless of course, and clearly I wasn’t the only one who had the bronzer idea because Amber’s face looked sun-kissed, as well. Angie wore a sapphire blue halter top with a low back and front combining the style of both Feliz and Amber. Her breasts were pushed up in a designer bustier that threatened to run her cups completely over if she sneezed too hard.
I guess she won’t be doing the Cha-Cha Slide. One hop and those puppies are jumping that fence!
I smirked to myself. Angie also wore dark, denim skinny jeans.
“Well damn! I feel under dressed.” I joked. Seeing my girls invigorated me and I finally was ready to hit the streets and get a taste of the infamous Miami nightlife.
We all piled into the rental car and Angie drove us to a spot called Joe’s Stone Crab. I got excited just from seeing the sign and was suddenly reminded of my empty stomach. As soon as we were seated I scanned the menu and locked in my sights on the giant lump crab cakes and ordered a side of fries before snatching a piece of bread from the basket the waiter placed on the table.
“I guess you were hungrier than you thought, huh?” Angie asked with curious raise of her brow.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I said sheepishly as I popped a piece of the roll in my mouth.
“Ok ladies! Let’s do a shot!” Feliz said flagging down the waiter to order a round.
“I’m not so sure about that.” I started. “I haven’t been feeling the best today, but order me one and after I eat, I’ll see how it goes. If I don’t drink it, I know one of you will!” I looked up from the dessert menu I’d been eyeing to find a table full of raised eyebrows over quizzical expressions.
“Since when do
you
not do tequila shots? I know you said you were easing off alcohol, but this is Miami! You better suck it up and take one for the team! You can do one shot. If it doesn’t work out, hell, you were probably gonna be sick anyway so it won’t matter. Angela mentioned that you haven’t felt well and that your stomach is queasy.” Feliz waved me off nonchalantly as she called the waiter over.
“Wait Feliz,” Amber chimed. “Maybe she
shouldn’t
take the shot. We can have a good time without alcohol right?”
“Yes Amber, we
can,
but why
should
we. Dammit, it is Saturday night, I’m in Miami and I don’t have shit to do tomorrow. I am
definitely
taking shots!” She placed her hand on the waiter’s forearm and flashed a smile. “We’ll have a round of tequila shots. Put them on my bill.” As the waiter walked away she continued, “Shit, you guys are crazy if you think I came all the way to Florida to celebrate my girl’s birthday and you think I’m not gonna drink! Angie, we are getting our party on this weekend young lady. Happy Birthday!!!”
Just as Feliz finished her speech the waiter returned with what seemed to be four
very
large shots. Feliz picked up her shot glass first and eyed the rest of us until we followed her lead. “I’d like to propose a toast to one of the best, strongest, most loving and bossy-assed women I know, and the reason we’re all here in Miami! Happy 40
th
birthday Ange! We love you! Now kick this shit off right! Bottoms up!” Feliz took the shot down in one large gulp and watched each of us take ours. I had to smile at the irony. I was usually the one taking the lead on these Tequila Turn-ups. I waited for Angie and Amber to take their shots before I took mine. I was certain Amber would take forever, but of course, this was the one time she was Ms. Jose Cuervo! I closed my eyes and held my breath to avoid smelling the grain alcohol as I felt it burn against my lips. I tossed the shot back hard, swallowed and waited to see how it would fare once it reached my stomach. As I felt the warmth in my esophagus spread down to the pit of my gut, I said a small prayer that whatever I sent down tonight would stay there. I was startled from my daydream as Feliz let out a cheer.
“Woo hoo! That’s my girl! Let’s have another!” I pursed my lips tightly into a smile as I watched her flag down the waiter again.
Fifteen minutes and two shots later the food came. My head was swimming. Not drinking for several weeks had me feeling like a lightweight. Fortunately, the crab cakes were flawless and the fries absorbed most of the liquor in my system.
While I ate, I had devised a plan for how I would get through the rest of the night without consuming any more alcohol. I genuinely wasn’t feeling up to it and I was trying not to spoil everyone’s good time so when we left the restaurant and settled at Nikki Beach Club I paid the waitress an extra fifty bucks not to give me any alcohol and to figure out how to make my drink match everyone else’s.
I can’t seem to shake this bug, but I’m determined to power through even if I have to cheat a little.
As anticipated, the girls drank, sang and danced the night away. The DJ even gave a special birthday shout out to Angie which made dodging drinks all the more challenging. When Angie, Amber and Feliz were all plastered and I was pretending to be plastered, I escorted them to the car and used the GPS to find my way back to the hotel. I safely and soberly escorted my friends to the suite and made sure they all got tucked into their beds. Amber was calling hogs like a champ, Feliz was mumbling something about moving to Miami and Angie was passed out with an arm and a leg dangling from the bed. I rolled her over to her side and crawled into bed myself.
In the morning, I’ll fake a hangover like the rest of them.
My last thoughts were about how I was going to convince my friends to step onto a nude beach and take their clothes off tomorrow and go skydiving in the same day!
What the hell was I thinking?
There was no time to mull it over before the mattress took me hostage again.