When Tony Met Adam (Short Story) (2 page)

Give me a call if it mends
.

It was only after that, when Tony was walking away—walking backward so he could keep smiling at Adam—that Adam finally smiled, too. Smiled and even laughed, as he held Tony’s gaze.

Adam was going to call him. He
was
. Maybe not tonight or tomorrow. But sooner or later. And then …

“That’s one hell of a grin,” Izzy said now, as they stood together on that Boston sidewalk. “Huh. I guess it really
doesn’t
suck to be you.”

“Hi, yeah, Adam. This is Tony, um, Vlachic, although as I’m telling you that, I realize I never gave you my
last name and, um … Well, we met in Boston? I’m the SEAL with the, um, pen. And yeah, I know it’s only been a month, and you’re probably still not over what’s-his-name, but my team’s on the verge of heading out for a little non-recreational camping, and I just wanted to let you know, in case you saved my number and actually tried to give me a call sometime in the next few months, while I’m gone. I won’t be able to call you right back, and yeah, who am I fooling? We both know my real goal here is to maybe hit some kind of patriotic nerve. Support our troops! Or guilt you into going out to dinner with me before I go out there, risking my life, right? I heard you were back in L.A., and me, I’m in San Diego right now, so … Call me, okay? I’ll make the drive up and … I’m just going to bottom line it here: I’d really love to see you before I go.”

Adam listened to the voice mail as Tony recited his cell phone number in his husky baritone. He had the kind of voice that telegraphed the fact that he was smiling, which was nice.

He had a lot of other things that were equally, if not even more, nice.

He’d also somehow found Adam’s private cell phone number, which was impressive. Adam had to give the kid points for knowing what he wanted, and going for it. It reminded him of the way Jules had pursued him, all those years ago, back when Adam was even younger than Tony was now.

Of course, Tony reminded him of Jules for more than just his courtship techniques. Risking his life? No shit. And no way was Adam going
there
again, even if he was feeling up to starting something new, which he wasn’t.

And that was why he punched the
TALK
button and called Tony back. Because the SEAL was going to keep calling him—provided he survived his overseas assignment. And his assignment after that. He’d call. And he’d call. And one of the times that he’d call, he’d catch Adam with his guard down and … No two ways about it, it was absolutely best to end this now.

“Hey! Adam!” As Tony answered, he didn’t play it even remotely cool, which was very sweet and completely charming. He just let his immense pleasure show in his voice. “Thanks for calling me back. How
are
you?”

“You mean, besides wondering how you got my phone number?”

Tony laughed. “Actually, Sam gave it to me.”

“Sam.”

“Starrett?” Tony asked. “You know from Troubleshooters …?”

“Oh, I know Cowboy Sam plenty well,” Adam said. “Wow, he must really hate you.”

Tony laughed again. “That’s funny. He said you’d say that. But no, he likes me plenty. See, I had something he wanted, and he was willing to give me your phone number for it.”

Adam had to laugh at that. “If you’re at all trying to imply that you and Sam Starrett hooked up—”

“What? No!” Tony was genuinely amused. “You must not know Sam very well. He’s straight. Indisputably.”

“No, I know that,” Adam said. “That’s why I was skeptical that he’d suddenly go all trade for—”

“He’s been trying to recruit me, for Troubleshooters Incorporated,” Tony said. “I promised to approach him first, after I leave the teams. And for that promise, he gave me, you know. Your phone number.”

“After you leave,” Adam repeated warily. He didn’t dare let himself hope. “Is that, like, next year or in ten years …?”

“More like ten,” Tony said. “Before that, if DADT catches up to me, or if my knees give out.”

Yeah, that was what he thought.

Tony took his silence for the invitation that it wasn’t. “So, dinner,” he said cheerfully. “I’ve got the next coupla days off, so the timing’s really good. I can be up there in … Well, give me a few hours. Hey, do you know a good Italian restaurant, because I’m so jonesing for some serious lasagna—”

“Does that really work for you?” Adam interrupted him. “The whole wide-eyed-and-innocent thing? I know exactly what you’re
jonesing
for, sweetheart, and it has absolutely nothing to do with lasagna.”

Down in San Diego, Tony missed only the shortest of beats as he regrouped, and mounted a new offense. So to speak.

“I thought you’d appreciate my giving you some space and taking it slowly—” he started.

“Oh, is that what you’re doing?” Adam interrupted him again. “Giving me
space
. Because it reads to me like you’re playing a game. Sweet and sincere didn’t work, so now you’re trying honest and honorable. Fuck you. Better yet, fuck me. You want me? Come and get me, sailor-boy. But we play this game by my rules. No dinner, no bullshit, no heartfelt talks in front of the fireplace—in fact, no talking at all. No pretending this is something that it isn’t. It’s one night and goodbye. You don’t call me again. Not ever. In fact, you delete my number from your phone.”

Tony was silent now for well more than a beat. Adam just waited.

“Is that really what you want?” the SEAL finally asked, his voice quiet. “Because I have to confess, I’m looking for more than—”

“I don’t give a shit what you’re looking for,” Adam spoke over him. “Because this offer is non-negotiable. You show up—” he rattled off his address and his apartment number “—we get it on, you put your clothes back on, and then you leave. End of game.”

The kid actually laughed, seemingly genuinely amused. “Wow, sounds tempting, but …” His voice changed then, getting both softer and harder at the same time. “How about I show up, I fuck your brains out, and
then
you decide if you still want me to leave.”

“Yes or no,” Adam said, refusing to react. No, that wasn’t heat he wasn’t feeling. It didn’t mean anything at all. “That’s all you need to tell me.”

Now Tony laughed his exasperation. “Don’t you even want to—”

“One. Of two words,” Adam spoke over him, enunciating clearly. “I’m going to count to two, and if you haven’t said yes by then, I’m going to hang up, which will make it an automatic no. One …”

“Yes,” Tony said. “
Hell
, yes. I’ll be there by ten.” And he was the one who cut the connection.

Leaving Adam alone in the deepening twilight in his kitchen, wondering what the fuck he was doing, playing with this kind of fire.

   Tony had a change of clothes and a toothbrush in a backpack that he kept in his locker in the building that headquartered SEAL Team Sixteen.

According to Adam, he wasn’t going to need it, but he grabbed it anyway and was heading down the corridor toward the parking lot and his car when the sound of voices made him slow down.

And then he stopped, altogether, when he heard who it was and what he was saying.

“I know we’re supposed to follow
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,”
Danny Gillman was saying to someone in the senior chief’s office—probably the senior chief, “but somebody’s got to ask him. I mean, we have a right to know, don’t we?”

Him
being Tony. Great. Tony inched closer, the better to hear exactly what they were saying. If the senior chief was involved, it was over and done. His so-called friends had outed him. It wasn’t a huge surprise, since all of them had carefully avoided him since they’d returned from Boston.

Still he was disappointed.

“Nothing’s changed.” Great, Jay Lopez was in there, too. His normally quiet voice was slightly raised in exasperation. “So what if he’s gay, Dan. He’s still the best operator I’ve ever worked with. Hands down,
the
best. If any of us were putting together a team, who’s the first man we’d pick?”

“Chickie.” That was Mark Jenkins’s voice. He was in there, too.

“The Chick-ster,” Izzy chimed in. “You know I love you, Fishboy, but you’d only be second on my list. Third. Okay, honestly? Sixteenth.”

“All I’m saying,” Gillman pointedly ignored Izzy, “is that someone should ask him. If he’s got some kind of weird crush on one of us—”

“You,” Izzy interrupted him. “Don’t you really mean you? Somehow I don’t see you getting quite this upset at the idea of the V-man wanting to get jiggy with, oh, say,
moi.”

“He’s seen me naked,” Gillman complained.

“We’ve all seen you naked,” Izzy said. “Of course, we’re not gay.” He paused. “Or
are
we? For all you know, I’m secretly a tranny lesbian, who dreams of you every night.”

“An entire busload of Australian nuns saw you naked,” Jenk pointed out. “During that training exercise …? When you trapped that jellyfish in your trunks …?”

“Pee on me! Pee on me!” Izzy pitched his voice slightly higher, in a decent impersonation of Gillman. Jenkins laughed and chimed in with him. “For the love of God, pee on me!”

“It stung me and it hurt,” Gillman said, laughing, too—despite himself. “Besides, they were nurses.”

“They were also nuns,” Jenk pointed out. “And as astonishingly attractive as you think you are, Dan, I’m pretty sure none of
them
wanted to have sex with you, either. So I think you can relax.”

“It just freaks me out,” Dan said. “I mean, just thinking about it. Thinking about him …”

“I
think you’re more freaked out that Chick’s gay and
doesn’t
want to do you,” Izzy said.

“That’s really not helping,” Jay told Izzy mildly.

“He’s making a lot of noise about it,” Izzy said. “Methinks he doth protest too much.”

“Methinks I’m going to put my foot up your ass, if you don’t shut the fuck up,” Dan fired back at Izzy.

“Wow, that’s pretty homoerotic,” Izzy said. “I mean, as far as threats go …”

“Zanella.” Tony heard Jay’s chair scrape the floor as he stood up. “Stop. Dan, are you seriously saying you want to put Tony into a position where he’ll be forced either to lie or out himself?”

“No,” Dan said, but then added, “I don’t know. I’m just …” He exhaled hard. “Jesus, Lopez, if I were in your shoes, I wouldn’t be defending him. I would be pissed.”

“I
am
pissed,” Jay said. “But I’m not pissed at Tony. I’m pissed at the stupid system.
How was your evening? How’s Callie?
How many times did I ask him that? We all did. And he couldn’t answer any of us honestly. Can you imagine not being able to talk about what you did last night, or over the weekend?” He paused. “Does
any
one know if he’s got a boyfriend or a partner?”

There was silence again, as they all probably shook their heads.

“Can you imagine?” Jay said again. “For all I know, T’s married, and because he wants to serve our country, he can’t introduce the love of his life to any of us. He can’t even whisper his name. And that’s just wrong.” He paused again. “Have any of you guys spoken to him since we got back from Boston?”

“No,” Jenk said.

“It’s kind of hard to know what to say,” Izzy said.

“Yeah,” Jay agreed. “For me, too. I’ve been getting all inside my head about the
Don’t Ask
part of the deal. I’m afraid to ask him anything, even
what are you doing for lunch?
Forget about
what are you doing this weekend?”

Tony walked the last few steps down the hall and stood in the open doorway. As he’d come to suspect throughout their conversation, the senior chief
wasn’t
there. It was just Jay and Dan and Izzy and Jenk, hanging out.

“Hey,” he said, and they all looked up at him in surprise.

“Actually,” he continued. “I’m heading up to Los Angeles. See, there’s someone that I, um, really like. A lot. And they just invited me over and, um, I’m probably going to get my ass kicked. Emotionally, I mean. But I’m still going.”

They were all still staring at him, so he added, “So that’s what I’m doing this weekend. It’s okay if you ask. I can make my answers gender-neutral.”

“As opposed to lying about Callie,” Jay said.

Tony met his gaze. “I apologize for that. You were convinced we were together and … It was the path of least resistance, so I, um, took it.”

“Lopez didn’t ask her out because he thought you were really into her,” Izzy said.

That was a total newsflash, and clearly it was accurate because now Jay was looking down at the floor, shaking his head slightly.

“Ah, shit, man.” Tony felt awful. “I honestly didn’t know.”

“He didn’t want you to know,” Izzy said. “What was he going to say,
Hey, T. Guess what? I’m packing a woodie for your girlfriend …
”

“He thought you were insane,” Jenk added, “to let her move to … where was it, Miami?”

“Milwaukee,” Jay said.

“Shit,” Tony said again.

“I wasn’t honest with you, either,” Jay said, finally looking up at him. “It’s my fault, too.”

“If you want,” Tony said, even though he knew it was too little, too late, “I can give you her phone number and email—”

But Jay was shaking his head. “Thanks, but no. It’s one thing to work the long-distance angle when it’s forced on you, but another entirely to seek it out.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“I’m already over it,” Jay said. “Same way I got over being disappointed in you for not trusting me with the truth.”

“It wasn’t about trust,” Tony tried to explain. “It’s about responsibility. I couldn’t dump that on you. I wasn’t thinking clearly when I did what I did that night in Boston. I should have been more discreet.”

“You shouldn’t have to lie,” Jay said.

“The world is what it is,” Tony said, hiking his pack farther up on his shoulder. “And I live in it. I gotta go.” He nodded to Jay and Jenk and Izzy, all of whom dared to meet his eyes.

Gillman, however, was still looking down at the floor. Still, he was the one who spoke up. “This … person you’re meeting in L.A.,” he said, using the same neutral gender that Tony had, and proving once again that he was way smarter than he looked and acted. “If it’s who I think it is … They don’t have a reputation for being … exclusive. You sure you know what you’re doing?”