Where Love Grows (41 page)

“He has a way with words around me,” Susan said. Then she wondered if that was the right thing to say. She breathed a sigh of relief when Steve's
mamm
took it in stride.

“If you can get him talking, then I'd say Steve's finally found the right one,” She said as she ushered them inside and waved her hand toward the interior of the house. “Come meet the others. I'm sure you won't remember all the names. I don't remember my own half the time.”

“
Mamm
, it's not that bad.” Steve took ahold of Susan's hand. He didn't let go until they were inside, making the rounds, and had shaken everyone's hand. The living room was crowded, with long, double tables filling the length of the house.

They all said their names and where they belonged. Susan listened to each one, filing it away, hoping the names stuck with the faces somewhere in her brain. Some of the names she already knew. Abe was Steve's
daett
, who shook her hand warmly. Martha was the oldest sister who was married. The brother after Steve, Emmanuel, was also married and standing beside his smiling young wife, Ruby. The other names would have to wait, she figured, until she learned to know the people better.

Martha took Susan under her wing and led her out to the kitchen first and then upstairs. “There are six bedrooms on the second floor,” Martha said. “Two on the first floor, and two more in the basement.
Mamm
and
Daett
added on to the house twice.”

“It's so big!” Susan said.

Martha smiled. “And this is Steve's room—or was. His brothers have taken it over now.”

Susan looked inside. There didn't seem anything unusual about it. Just bare walls with two beds and dressers. Some Amish boys kept books around or deer heads on the walls, but these two didn't. The Mast boys must live like Steve did, simple, direct, and to the point.

Martha took her downstairs again, and Susan joined in with the food preparation. Everyone chatted as they worked, with most of the news mentioned being unfamiliar to Susan. Who among the young people was seeing whom. Which of the women in the community were expecting. What plans they had for their gardens in the coming year.

By ten o'clock, breakfast was spread out on the tables in the living room. Ham sliced by Elizabeth. Bacon, great bowls of it, cooked to golden perfection. Biscuits with gravy, chunks of sausage swimming in the depths. Blueberry pancakes, fresh maple syrup, eggs fried so the yolks trembled on the plates. Butter piled high in double-layered stacks, raw and sliced apples, peaches, and pineapple. And, last but not least, jars of hard candy, homemade taffy, licorice, buckeyes, and double-layered chocolate bars.

“Will everyone please be seated?” Elizabeth said. “It doesn't matter where, but keep your children with you. And no little ones into the candy until we've eaten our eggs and pancakes.”

Steve came out of the crowd and took Susan by the hand. “Come over here.”

“Where are you taking me?” she asked.

He motioned for her to be seated off to the side but near the head of the first table. “Right here.”

“But everyone will see us.”

“No, they won't,” he said. “They'll be too busy eating. I want you to be able to talk with
Mamm
and
Daett.”

Susan felt warm inside. Now that she had met his
mamm
and
daett
, she could see what an honor this was. They were very nice people, and Steve was clearly thrilled to have her here. What a wonderful day this was turning out to be. These were common people like her own
mamm
and
daett
. She would be okay.

Elizabeth and Abe took their places at the first table, and Abe opened the large Bible he was carrying. He cleared his throat and said, “We wish to thank everyone for coming today. It's
gut
to have you all in our house. But especially we want to welcome Susan, who is here with Steve for the first time. For those of you who thought Steve would never settle down, well, it looks like you were wrong.”

Susan felt her ears grow red. She ducked her head as the others chuckled and laughed. Steve reached under the table for her hand.

“Now I wish to read a short few verses out of the Gospel of Matthew,” Abe said. He then began reading the verses in German. When he was done, he closed the Bible and prayed. “Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name…”

Susan closed her eyes and listened to the sound of his voice quoting the familiar words. This was so like the words her
daett
prayed at home, and no doubt like his
daett
before him. She was becoming a part of all this, a wonderful and
gut
part with Steve. It was so wonderful it hurt all the way down to her toes.

“Amen,” Abe said, reaching the end of the prayer and sitting down in his chair.

“Please start passing whatever food is in front of you,” Elizabeth said. “Don't be afraid to eat.”

Susan smiled as Steve again squeezed her hand under the table. “They like you,” he whispered. “And I like you too.”

She looked away, knowing her face was bright red again.

W
hen the driver dropped Susan at home that night, she figured she had experienced the best Christmas Day ever. Her worries about meeting the Masts had been needless. She already felt like part of the family. Now, if Steve would just ask me to marry him…but she pushed the thought away. That would happen in its own
gut
time, like
Mamm
said.

Mamm
and
Daett
were in bed when she arrived, and she crept silently up the stairs and fell into bed exhausted, not waking once during the night. It was still dark when she did awake to the noise of
Mamm
banging around in the kitchen downstairs. Why was
Mamm
up so early on the morning after Christmas? They ought to be sleeping in for another hour. There were no cows to milk, and the chores could be done by
Daett
after a late breakfast.

Had something happened between
Mamm
and
Daett
and Deacon Ray? What else could be waking
Mamm
at this hour and causing her to be so noisy?

Susan threw off the covers with a wild fling. She lit the kerosene lamp and dressed quickly. With lamp in hand, she went down the stairs, pausing a moment at the bottom to still her beating heart. Whatever had happened, she had to be strong for
Mamm
's sake.
Daett
would be okay, but this might be the straw that broke
Mamm
's endurance. Why hadn't she knocked on their bedroom door last night to check on them? The least she could have done was ask how their day had gone. But no, she had been on cloud nine about her day in Daviess County and the wonderful attention Steve and his parents had paid her.

Susan tiptoed into the kitchen and set the lamp on the table.
Mamm
was obviously crying as she stood over the stove.

“
Mamm
, what's wrong?” Susan asked.

“Oh Susan!”
Mamm
groaned as she turned to face her daughter. “How could you do this to us?”

“What are you talking about? I was in Daviess County yesterday with Steve. What did I do?”

“Susan—an
Englisha
driver's license? And upstairs in your bedroom all this time? And you attending the baptismal class!”

Susan sat down abruptly. “How does anyone know about my driver's license?”

“It doesn't matter how anyone found it. What matters is that you have it.”

“It doesn't mean anything,
Mamm
. I was just keeping it for the memory. Believe me, please. I'm staying here.”

“Does Steve know about it?”
Mamm
was looking at her sternly.

Susan's mind raced. Was she going to get Steve in trouble? Yes, she might, yet she couldn't lie.

“I see,”
Mamm
said, reading the answer in Susan's face. “So the two of you have been in this secret together?”

“No,
Mamm
.” Susan leaped to her feet. “Steve has nothing to do with this. He dug the information out of me, but he's been nice by not saying anything. He understands I need time to heal. To get over Thomas's betrayal…and everything else that has caused such trouble.”

“And you think keeping an
Englisha
driver's license upstairs is okay? How is that helping you get over anything? It's more like an escape door in case things get rough. Something you can always fall back on if you need to or want to.”

“You think that's the reason I've kept it? I can't believe you would think such a thing of me. I've never been more settled in the community than I am right now.”

“It doesn't matter what I think.”
Mamm
sighed. “It's what Deacon Ray thinks, and I'm sure he knows by now.”

“You told him?”

“Your
Mamm
didn't tell anyone anything,”
Daett
's voice said behind her. “Teresa found the license when she went up to change into one of your dresses because Samuel threw up all over hers. Deacon Ray's daughter, Rachel, went upstairs with her to help. She saw the driver's license.”

“Teresa knew it was there,” Susan said, the kitchen walls swimming in front of her eyes. “What did she do, wave it around for all to see?”

“Teresa did nothing of the sort,”
Mamm
said. “She didn't tell me until Deacon Ray's family left around eight. The girl understands me. She knew it would have been difficult for me to make it through the day knowing what had happened. And I'm not sure she would have told me about finding it if Rachel hadn't seen it.”

Daett
was shaking his head. “You're not blaming others for this problem, are you, Susan? Teresa didn't go looking for the license. She didn't bring it downstairs and thrust it in anyone's face.”

“It dropped to the floor as she pulled out the dress,”
Mamm
said. “It was hidden in your clothing, I guess. Rachel picked it up. That wasn't Teresa's fault. You shouldn't hide things in the first place. You know sin always comes to light, Susan.”

“So what am I to do now?” Susan buried her face in her hands as her tears flowed.

“You can start by burning the license,”
Mamm
said. “And then by taking a trip over to Deacon Ray's place to confess.”

“The sooner you do that the better, Susan,”
Daett
agreed. “It's time you make your choice about staying or going once and for all.”

“Not like this.” Susan groaned. “It wasn't supposed to happen this way. Steve and I were working our way through this. Why does someone else have to interfere? Why does it have to be such a big deal?”

“We're a community,”
Daett
reminded her. “We're not people who live alone. What one person does affects us all. You should never try to work through these things by yourself. It doesn't work.”

“Go get the license, Susan,”
Mamm
ordered. “There's no use waiting around. I have the stove hot.”

“You weren't preparing breakfast?” Susan stared at the bare stove.

“I was trying,”
Mamm
said. “But my heart was too torn. How could you put us through this, Susan? And right after we are healing from our own wound?”

“I'm sorry.” Susan rose. “I'll go get it.”

Susan took the kerosene lamp with her, its light dancing off the narrow walls of the stairway. Tears stung her eyes. Now would be the time to make a stand, to refuse to turn over the license and face the consequences. She would have to leave home…and leave Steve too. She walked to her bedroom window and looked out over the dark fields where the dawn was breaking in the sky.

Fiery colors of red and orange hung low on the horizon. There was a storm coming in the next day or so, but inside the house it was already here. Did she want to leave all of this again?
Mamm
and
Daett
, the home place, Steve? This time there would be no easy return. And no Teresa to bring her home.