White Shadows (16 page)

Winona stretched. “Is it morning?”

“Yes, Golden Eyes, it is morning.” Glancing out across the lake to judge the time, he spotted a flock of birds taking to the sky. He went still and scanned the area. Minutes later his eyes followed the flight of three deer who leaped across the green grass until they disappeared back into the thick undergrowth.

Frowning, he rolled Winona off him and lifted himself up as far as he could without hanging his head.

Winona turned over and peered out at the tranquil lake. “What is it, Clay?”

Clay backed out. “Come on, Golden Eyes. Get Moving. I think we have company.”

Keeping low so he wouldn’t be spotted, Night Shadow watched Winona slip back into the hidden cavern through a narrow opening behind one of the wide rocks. He followed with the furs. Their clothing had been shed below.

Once below, he dropped his armload of furs and used a piece of hide to wash himself while Winona did the same. The silence grew heavy between them. Their idyllic time together had just come to an end. Even after her father moved on, nothing would be quite the same.

When he went to the small, naturally formed window, Winona followed. Anyone who was out there was still too far to see him from this distance. Winona got down and peered out through a tiny fissure. “I do not see anyone.”

“They are there.” Of that Night Shadow was certain. Moving, he knelt down beside her. They stared at each other. “You are amazing.”

He still couldn’t believe that Winona wanted to help him. It didn’t matter that there was nothing she could do to change his mind. The very fact that she wanted to save him from her father did something strange to his insides.

“You could be free with one shout,” he said, the backs of his fingers sliding down her check and along one side of her jaw.

“I will never be free again,” she whispered.

Night Shadow knew her words had nothing to do with her sister. What she did now she did for him, and with him. She truly amazed him. The past few days were the happiest, most peaceful days he’d had since losing his family.

Drawing in a deep breath, Night Shadow resumed watching. The waiting should have been easy. The hard part was done. His prey was within reach. But would all this bring him Jenny or just more heartache?

He glanced out of the corner of his eye and watched Winona. Somewhere hidden by the trees her family searched. For the first time since embarking on this mission he wished he could have achieved revenge without causing more pain and suffering. Was it right for him to put his need to find his sister over the good of others?

He was no better than his enemy. He grimaced. That wasn’t true. And had there been another way he’d have chosen it. But Henry Black Bear would never have told Night Shadow the truth, and once Henry knew Clay Blue Hawk lived, he’d never stop trying to kill him in order to keep the past buried.

Night Shadow rubbed the back of his neck. He’d had no choice but to strike at Henry in a more public way. With Winona’s father involved, Henry would have pressure on him to return Jenny, if for no other reason than to keep Clay silent until Henry found and killed him or was killed.

Nor would Henry reveal the truth or meaning behind the messages that Night Shadow had given to Sharp Nose to leave along the trail once they’d separated. The other two warriors had been instructed to ride off separately for a day, then backtrack. Crazy Fox was to follow Winona’s father and his warriors and keep an eye on Hoka Luta while Dream Walker kept Spotted Deer safely hidden.

Night Shadow could only hope that Henry wanted the chief’s daughter badly enough to produce Jenny. Reaching down to take a strand of Winona’s dark hair between his fingers, he brought the silky strand to his nose and inhaled sunshine.

She met his gaze and smiled at him. Night Shadow drew in a deep breath and leaned down to plant a kiss near the corner of her mouth. “I will never let you go.” He had no intention of letting Winona go back to Henry Black Bear.

“I do not want you to let me go.”

Her words warmed him. And made him feel guilty. What kind of life could he give her? Her father would never stop searching for her, and if he kept her with him they’d have to live alone, for he wouldn’t risk innocent people being killed if her father found them.

“I want to help you.” Her fingers slid along his jaw.

“I know. But what you ask is impossible.”

Winona sighed. “You are thickheaded.”

“So you tell me—often.” He returned his attention to the lake.

Shadows from the trees lining the lake emerged. Warriors on foot with bows drawn crept into view.

“Shhh,” he said, grateful for an excuse not to discuss the matter. He’d never agree to meet with her father and present his story.

Tense minutes crawled by. Finally a group on horseback left the concealing woods. He heard Winona draw in a deep breath as she saw members from her tribe below. “What are they doing here?” She whispered the question.

Night Shadow frowned when he saw two women and several children in the group. “Who are they?”

“My mother, my brother’s wife and their children.” Winona’s voice caught.

“I’m sorry, Golden Eyes.” And he was, for if she stayed with him—if he could not release her—she’d never see them again.

“It is not too late to stop this,” Winona whispered, looking at him.

He clenched his fist and ignored her.

“Clay, if I go to my father with your story he can help.”

Throwing her an angry and frustrated look, he held up his hand. “No. If your father didn’t kill me, Henry Black Bear, the man you are to wed, would. Even if it meant being killed himself, he would not let me live long enough to tell my tale.”

Winona stood. “First, I am not going to marry Hoka Luta, or Henry or whoever he is. And I am smart enough to talk to my father alone. Once he knows the truth, he can take Ho—Henry prisoner and make him tell us where Jenny is.”

She sent him a pleading look. “It is a better plan than dying if he does catch you.”

The man in him needed her more than anything. But the warrior, far too used to being in control, could not take what she offered. It wasn’t just pride or his distaste for failure. It went deeper. This was something he had to do. Henry wasn’t just his problem; he was Clay’s redemption, and until he’d met Winona, he hadn’t realized how important it was for him to come face-to-face with his past.

Since his Golden Eyes had come into his life, the man inside had broken through the walls of the self-imposed prison he’d erected and was slowly merging with the emotionless warrior.

Night Shadow had planned and waited for this moment. Night Shadow, the trained warrior, would not hesitate to kill Henry, a man who’d cold-bloodedly wiped out a family of women and children. But he had to know that the part of him that was also Clay Coburn could go through with it. Clay had to face his past and end the hatred and torment in order to claim his future.

Staring down at Winona he knew it would be so easy just to take her away and disappear. There were many places they could go where no one would find them. But it wasn’t the life he wanted for her, their children or himself, and this wasn’t something he could ask others to do for him.

He didn’t tell her what he only now understood. Finding Jenny and learning of her fate wasn’t his salvation. It was only part. He had to face Henry and face his past with all the horror, betrayal and his own feelings of guilt before he could release the bitterness and hatred that held him chained to the darkness.

With this woman, he’d seen light—walked in it and wanted it totally. And because of the gift of life she’d given him, he was determined to come to her a whole man. Not two men. He had to blend Clay and Night Shadow into one.

Standing near the stone window fashioned by Mother Earth’s loving hands, Winona stared out into the foggy morning. A pale sea of moist, thick cotton floated far below her, concealing the dark blue lake and bright banks of green grass.

She rubbed her arms. Moisture dampened her skin and collected on the brownish-gray walls of granite. Breathing in the chilling air cleared her mind, but her soul felt frozen. Shifting slightly, she rested her shoulder against the clammy wall and watched Clay gather his weapons and strap on his knife.

Dread crept through her heart. Neither begging, pleading nor anger could sway him from leaving their safe haven to scout the area to be sure her family had left. Rubbing her hands up and down her arms, she sought the words to keep him from leaving. Moving close to Clay she rested her palms on his shoulder and stared down at his head. Her fingers trailed through the golden-brown strands of his hair. It was soft and silky. Her fingers tightened.

“Stay with me, Clay. You have warriors following my father. Wait for them to come to you. You do not know where Henry is. It is not safe to go out.”

Clay stilled. “I am a warrior. I will not hide like—”

Winona dug her fingers into the cool flesh of his shoulder. “Like a woman or child? At least you would be safe. Henry could be out there, watching. What if Sharp Nose or Crazy Fox cannot come to you without fear of Henry seeing them?”

Clay pulled away to sling his quiver of arrows to his back.

Shaking her head, Winona fought the urge to throw one of many large stones at his hard head. “You are a fool if you leave.” She paused. “If you die, you fail me. And you fail your sister.”

The tensing of Clay’s shoulders was her only indication that her words struck him.

Tears welled in her eyes. Frustration made her want to scream, but she didn’t dare. “Clay—”

Clay whipped around. His eyes were dark as the stone walls surrounding them. “No more, Golden Eyes.”

Winona clamped her mouth shut to hold back words of love. Her need for him was so great that she wasn’t sure she could even put it into words without falling apart.

She whirled around and returned to the window. If he was determined to get himself killed there was little she could do. A single tear escaped. She loved Clay with all her heart and wasn’t sure she could live without him. How could he do this to her?

Gentle pressure on her shoulders brought her around. Clay’s fingers tipped her chin up, then spread along her jaw as he cupped her face tenderly in his hands. He leaned down and kissed her on the lips, licking the salty tears as they fell.

“I will be back before the sun is directly overhead, Golden Eyes.” His thumbs smoothed over her face.

Winona closed her eyes, ashamed of her weakness. She shuddered when he planted a kiss, light as a wisp of fog, near her eye.

“I love you,” he whispered.

Then he was gone.

Winona kept her eyes tightly shut. He loved her. The tears flowed faster. In her mind she called him every name she could think of. If he loved her, how could he leave? How could he love her and yet not do all in his power to spare her this hurt and worry? If he loved her, he’d do everything in his power to live.

For her.

With her.

Filled with fear and despair, Winona opened her eyes and stared around at the place that had become a cozy home in so short a time. How could she have fallen in love with a man who was stubborn, foolish and so much a part of her that if anything happened to him, she wasn’t sure she’d survive?

Tipping her head back, she sighed. Love was not as pleasant as it seemed to an outsider, she realized. Love hurt. It was not supposed to hurt, but it did.

Closing her eyes, Winona thought of Clay, of all the things she loved—and hated. She frowned. She loved his loyalty, his devotion, his strength.

Where most young men in Clay’s position might have given up and not survived Henry’s attack, Clay had lived—not for himself, but for a young sister he so clearly adored.

Winona sighed. Clay’s devotion and the depth of his feelings for those he loved made him who and what he was. Did she have a right to try to hold on to him for herself? Slowly she moved away from the window. No, she did not. Clay’s path had been set long before she’d met him, and had she been his younger sister, she’d have wanted to know that she’d never been forgotten.

Love was selfless, yet all-encompassing. And it was that selfless love on his part that kept Clay from hiding from his enemy and relying on his friends to do all the work. Especially now that he had her. She knew he had to resolve his past in order to have a future—with her.

Though she knew all this deep in her heart, it didn’t ease the ache. And that, she knew, was part of loving. Stooping to pick up a thick fur, she carried it over to the largest crack beneath the window and sank down. It was going to be a long day.

Night Shadow moved slowly through the trees to a place he’d arranged to meet Crazy Fox, who, according to their plan, was to stay behind after Winona’s family continued on. Sharp Nose would also be near and would return to the cavern as soon as he led Winona’s family and the rest of the warriors, including Hoka Luta, to a place not far from the lake.

The false trail would dead end with one last message: a place and deadline for Jenny to be returned. Then, as soon as Dream Walker returned with Winona’s younger sister, the six of them would head for the next place of hiding Clay had chosen—a place they’d be able to remain for the summer until it was time to see if Henry Black Bear produced Jenny. The Sun Dance, held at the end of summer, seemed a long way off.

He drew in a deep, cleansing breath of air, felt the wetness burn his lungs and dampen his skin. He’d done all he could, and if Henry didn’t return Jenny by the time the Sun Dance was held, Night Shadow wasn’t sure what he’d do. He only knew he could not sell either Winona or Spotted Deer, as he’d threatened. If this plan to get his sister back failed, then he’d have no choice but to go after Henry Black Bear.

Then what? Return Winona to her family? His gut clenched. No! He needed her. She was the air he breathed, the warmth that glowed deep inside him, and the nourishment his soul needed to thrive. She was the light that chased away the darkness of his past—she was his future and he would not part with her.

Yet could he take her away from all she knew and loved? Could he take her from her family, knowing that she might never see them again? Unfortunately, that was their only choice. Her father would not accept him—not after taking her from her family, no matter what Winona claimed.

And what of Winona? Could she live with him, live with always looking over their shoulders, fearing that her father’s warriors had found them? He tightened one hand into a fist. Had Winona been his daughter he’d never stop searching for her—just as he’d never stopped looking for Jenny and never would. Until he learned of her fate he could not rest, and so he could not expect different from Winona’s father or brother.

That stopped him in his tracks. His entire adult life had been spent in a world of pain and uncertainty. Worrying, wondering and feeling so damn guilty. Yet he’d justified doing the same to others. Winona’s entire family: mother, sister-in-law, nieces and nephews—women and children—had all joined in the search.

Darkness stole into his heart, blotting out the ray of sunshine Winona had brought into his life. He knew he could not put another through that pain and uncertainty.

Night Shadow tipped his head back and stared at the clearing blue sky high above the towering trees. As much as it hurt, he knew he’d return Winona to her family at the end of the summer. If he had Jenny back at his side, he’d have proof of Henry’s black past, and then perhaps her family would forgive him. If not, he’d be dead before he had a chance to explain.

The wall of trees closed around him; the large granite formation where the woman he loved waited was out of sight, yet Winona’s will pulled at him. He kept going, didn’t glance back. This was what he’d lived for. He would not hide and let others take all the risk. At least, that was what he tried to tell himself.

But deep down inside there was another reason he refused to consider Winona’s plan to go to her father. He was Night Shadow, a man unafraid to go into battle against his toughest enemies, yet he feared that Winona’s father would be so furious with him that he’d keep him and Winona apart. Or worse, that once back with her family, Winona would choose them over him, leaving him more lost and alone than ever before. So even though he planned to return her, he selfishly yearned for whatever short time he had with her—even if he had to steal it.

Night Shadow hated the doubts chasing through his mind. He tried to still the tumble of thoughts. He stopped, took several deep breaths and sought control. Around him the sun had cleared the fog, but his heart still felt cold and dark.

The sudden hush that fell over the land drowned out his inner voices and had him silently cursing. He’d been so lost in his own thoughts and fears of the past and future that he hadn’t been paying attention to the present.

He glanced around, moving his head slowly, his gaze piercing through dark shadows and thick shrubbery. Not a single bird fluttered or sang. The branches of the bushes no long rustled as wildlife scurried from him.

Damn
. He wasn’t alone. Someone was out here with him. Who? And were they aware of his presence?

The zing of an arrow flying over his head was his answer.

From the top of the granite formation Winona found a narrow crack that separated the towers. Perfect. Not too big and, she hoped as she stared down, not too small. She needed a place where she could see everything without fear of being seen. Turning onto her belly, she lowered her feet down and found a foothold.

Slowly and carefully Winona climbed down the rough walls, remembering her path, each hand- and foothold. In one spot she had to rest her back on one side of the rocky slab and inch down with her feet opposite her.

Finally she stood on solid rock. With barely enough room to maneuver she made her way to the edge and dropped to her stomach. Though not as high as the very top, this deeply shadowed cleft afforded her a full view. She eyed the area below.

If anyone managed to climb the smaller, yet sheer-looking rock just below her, they still couldn’t get to where she lay. The space was too far to jump across, yet if anyone came this close, she’d have plenty of time to leave before she was spotted.

Winona settled down to search the rocks and trees for movement. Anger rose with each passing moment. Clay should have returned already. The sun was directly overhead.

She thought of Hoka Luta. He worried her. He hadn’t been among her father’s warriors earlier that morning. What if he was out there, watching, waiting? What if Clay’s plans failed? What would she do if anything happened to him? And Jenny? Was she still alive?

Winona knew that should anything happen to Clay she’d take up the search for Jenny, for she couldn’t imagine losing her entire family, just as she could not imagine waking up without Clay at her side.

In so short a time she had fallen in love totally. Forever. She remembered the hard, cold man she’d first met—a man living in the painful shadows of his past. This morning he’d worn that same hard, cold expression, yet she knew he was anything but unfeeling. He felt—deeply and completely. He was a devoted brother who’d never forgotten his baby sister, nor had he ever given up in his determination to find her.

He’d also been kind. Not once had he taken his anger or his need for vengeance out on her. Instead he’d done his best to keep his distance. Again, she thought, he’d been seeking to stay in the shadows.

She smiled softly. But she’d drawn him out into the light. He smiled, laughed and teased. He’d shown her the man he’d once been, and could become once more—unless her father or Hoka Luta killed him and took him from her forever.

Her smile faded. Her fingers scraped the rocky ledge as she drew them into fists. What would she do if something happened to Clay? She couldn’t bear the thought of losing the man she loved.

She got up on her knees, ready to go in search of Clay. She had to convince him that together they stood the best chance of convincing her father of his innocence.

Her shoulders drooped as she glanced around the lake. She had no idea where Clay was. Or her father. Or Hoka Luta. Settling back down, she shifted to remove a sharp stone from beneath her ribs and sighed. There was little to do but wait. And watch.

The sudden flurry of ducks landing in the water startled Winona awake. Disoriented, she realized she’d fallen asleep. Her gaze sought the sun’s position and, with horror, she realized it had already began its descent. Though there remained many hours of daylight left, the passage of time had Winona jumping to her feet. What if Clay had returned and hadn’t been able to find her?

Hurrying, she made her way back up the nearly sheer rock wall, fretting over the painstakingly slow going. Finally she emerged and ran back to the enclosed cavern.

As soon as she entered, she knew Clay had not returned. But to be sure she went to the back and climbed up. He wasn’t up on top either. She scooted into their stone tipi and searched the lake area below.

Dropping her forehead to the hard surface, she closed her eyes. Something was wrong. Rubbing her eyes, she went back to searching the lake area. A reddish blur down below on the white rocks made her jerk her head up. She slumped back down when she saw that it was just a red fox.

Red fox. She sprang to her knees—and cracked her head on the low ceiling. Rubbing her bruised scalp, she stared down at the fox. Foxes were usually seen only in the dawn or dusk. They were masters of blending in with their surroundings. Many people who walked the land believed they were even able to shape-shift.

Winona sucked in her breath when the fox turned and darted across the white mound of rock and slid back into the concealing line of trees. It was an omen. The fox bore a message for her.

He’d come out of hiding to tell her something was wrong. Backing up, she ran through the cozy cave, then out. By the time she crawled through the tunnel and pulled aside the large boulders, she was breathing hard and frantically.