Wings of the Wicked (15 page)

“I’m sorry,” he said gently. “I didn’t mean to bring up a bad memory.” He held out a hand. “Dance with me.”

I stared at his hand and then his face. “Really?”

“Oh, yes,” he said. “I am a superb dancer. Now, I want to see a smile on your face.”

He led me out to the dance floor and immediately spun and twirled me around like a professional. We dipped and whirled through the crowd, laughing and having a great time. I wished that Marcus was someone else, but I was happy having fun with him. When the song ended, I gave him a big hug and he returned it tightly.

“That’s much better,” he said, laughing. “You’re beautiful when you smile.”

Suddenly Kate shoved her way through the swarm of dancing people and grabbed my arm. “Save me.”

“Why?” I sputtered as she yanked me off the dance floor and dragged me into a quiet parlor down the hall.

“Josie,” she said. “Apparently there was a reason why she said everyone had to wear red or black.
She
’s wearing white.”

I grimaced. Of course Josie would want to be the one person standing out. “She’s pissed, huh?”

“I didn’t think she had it in her to get angry, but she gave me a look like straight-up murder.”

“Should we flee?”

“No,” she said. “Let’s just chill in here for a bit. Let her find something sparkly to distract her.”

“Wise move,” I noted.

Kate’s face brightened and she grinned. “Doesn’t Marcus look hot tonight?”

“Smokin’.”

“I think I’m falling for him, Ell.”

I forced a smile. “Really? Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

Her grin faded. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“He’s just… ,” I started, trying to dig out the right words. “He’s not a normal guy.”

“I know!” she chirped. “And that’s what makes him so amazing. He’s drop-dead gorgeous, so smart, he dresses
so
nice, and his
eyes
. Have you
seen
his eyes? They’re like gemstones. They don’t even look
real
. And sometimes I swear they get brighter. Kind of like how Will’s eyes get, you know? Not that I was checking him out … all the time …”

I gave her a fake glare. “Yeah, well… ,” I trailed off nervously. Marcus and Will were reapers. Their eyes were pretty much out of this world, just like the rest of them.

She smiled to herself. “And he’s sweet to me, Ell. No games, no immature high school boy nonsense. He is everything I want.”

“Could it be too good to be true?”

She frowned. “What is the matter with you? Do you think I’m just a piece of ass on his to-do list? I’m sensing a lot of hate here.”

“No, no, not hate,” I said. “He’s just … he’s dangerous, Kate.”

She laughed. “Oh, seriously? What, is he in fight club or something? Oh wait. We’re not supposed to talk about that.”

“I
am
serious, Kate,” I said firmly. “Look, just be careful.”

“Why do you want me to stay away from him so badly?” she asked, folding her arms over her chest. “Do
you
like him?”

“No! You know that’s not true. You know how I feel about Will.”

“I’m sorry, but I just don’t understand.”

The truth was, I couldn’t explain it to her. Maybe it was because immortal reapers descended from Fallen angels didn’t make good boyfriends because they had centuries’ worth of serious baggage. Maybe it was because they didn’t know how to function in the real world and didn’t understand human beings. Or maybe I was just talking about Will.

“Will told me,” I said hesitantly. “He wouldn’t really explain. He just said that Marcus has been in some trouble before.”

Kate rolled her eyes and huffed. “You don’t believe that story Marcus told about getting his scar in a knife fight, do you? Unless you tell me that he’s killed somebody, I’m going to keep seeing him.”

I thought better of responding to that. Chances were pretty good that Marcus had killed someone—
many
someones—since he hunted demonic reapers with Ava.

Ugh. Ava. I still hadn’t told Kate about what I’d learned. “Do you remember that girl Will was hanging out with who you convinced me to follow a couple weeks ago? Which, by the way, was a terrible idea.”

She grimaced. “Yeah, his ‘old friend.’”

“Well, my suspicions were right,” I admitted.

Her eyes bulged. “No! He cheated on you?”

I shook my head firmly. “He never cheated on me. We weren’t together. But he and this girl, Ava … they’ve slept together.”

“I’m sorry, Ell. They aren’t
still
, are they?”

“No,” I said. “It was a long time ago.”

“Ell.” Kate sighed. “I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but you’re very naïve. People who are ‘just friends’ have sex all the time. Friends with benefits—ever heard of it?”

The sick feeling was beginning to swirl through my belly again. “Well, he said he had never wanted even
that
with her, that he was going through a horrible time and it was a mistake.” I wasn’t going to tell her that
I
was the reason behind his dark period.

Her expression became more sympathetic. “Mistakes definitely happen. You can’t hold it against him.”

“It just makes things so awkward,” I said. “I can’t be mad at either of them, obviously. I’m just … jealous of her, I guess.”

She nodded and her expression softened. “I understand. Nobody wants to be around their boyfriend’s ex, especially if she’s gorgeous.”

“Will isn’t my boyfriend,” I corrected her. He never
had
been in reality, but describing him as my boyfriend to people in the real world helped explain his constant presence in my life. “Which makes it even harder for me to be jealous.”

“Same diff,” she said. “Whether he’s your boyfriend now or last month or whenever, it still hurts. I’m sorry you have to deal with her.”

I shrugged. “Yeah. She hangs out with Will and Marcus all the time.”

Her eyes darkened. “She’d better not touch Marcus.”

I laughed in an attempt to ease the tension in my body. “She doesn’t. They work together. Kind of.”

Kate sat up and grunted. “Well, girl better keep her claws off both our boys. Marcus and I are going back to his place after the party. And no, I’m not going to sleep with him, so get that out of your head. I’ve only known him for a few weeks.”

Maybe Kate would be fine. Marcus was dangerous, but I didn’t think he was a danger to her specifically. I loved Kate like a sister, but I had to trust her judgment. And if Will didn’t seem concerned either, then things might just turn out okay. I still wanted to talk to Marcus one more time and get his story straight.

As if he’d heard me say his name in my head or, more likely, he’d heard us talking about him the entire time, Marcus entered the room from the hall with a
very
cocky grin on his face. He’d definitely heard us talking about him.

“Am I interrupting anything?” he asked.

“Talking about you, of course,” Kate said.

He laughed. “I figured. Come join the party. Ellie, your Will looks very exhausted from fighting off girls all night. Might you want to rescue him?”

I rolled my eyes. “All he does is scowl and ignore them. The whole thing is hilarious. I have no idea why they keep harassing him.”

“Because he’s hot and has tattoos,” Kate offered, looking at me like I was an idiot. “Why
wouldn’t
their hands be all over him? Speaking of, why aren’t
your
hands all over him?” She took my hand. “Ready?”

“Yup. Onward.”

We headed back out to the dance hall when one of my favorite songs began to play. I spotted Will just where I’d left him, standing there patiently and looking a little bored.

“Are you better?” he asked, placing his hand over mine.

“Yes, much.”

He rewarded me with a smile.

“Will you dance with me tonight?”

The smile faded and he hesitated before answering. “Ellie—”

“Forget it,” I said, and stomped away from him. He called my name, but I didn’t turn back.

Marcus appeared in front of me with a pitying look. “You should have worn a different dress.”

I folded my arms over my chest. “I thought you liked it.”

“Oh,
very
much, but you’re killing your Guardian over there,” Marcus said with a nod in Will’s direction.

I rolled my eyes and tried not to blush. “Well, he’s killing me too.” But the last thing I wanted to do was talk to Marcus about my problems with Will. “Can I talk to you about Kate, actually?”

He frowned. “You may.”

“You understand what a bad idea it is, right?”

“I understand your concern,” he said. “But if it’s worth anything to you, I do care about her. She means something to me.”

“Why?” I asked. “You’re two hundred years old. How many girls have you met, slept with, fallen in love with? How is Kate the one to tame you?”

He laughed. “You have it all wrong. Kate is special. She’s a beautiful creature, tough to keep up with, and always gives you everything she’s got. But you have to understand. I am immortal. Nothing holds an immortal’s attention for very long, save for one exception. You and your Will.”

“Will is my Guardian,” I snapped back. “It’s different.”

He huffed and grinned. “Sure it is.”

“My situation with Will is not an excuse for you to get innocent human girls to fall in love with you and get into your bed.”

“Believe me,” he said. “I don’t intend to hurt Kate. It’s quite the opposite, actually.”

“But you intend to leave her when you get bored.”

“You completely underestimate her.”

“How so?” I asked defiantly.

“Do you really think she’ll be heartbroken over me? She’s not that kind of girl. She would move on from me in no time.”

I narrowed my gaze. “Maybe you’re right, but she’s starting to fall for you, Marcus. You know how wrong this is.”

“How is it any different from you and Will?”

“We aren’t together.”

“Come on, Ellie,” he said. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re both mad about each other—have been for as long as I’ve known either of you, and longer still.”

“We
can’t
be together,” I clarified. “For a million reasons, including the same reason you and Kate will never work out.”

The amusement washed away from his expression. “At least you’ll always return when you die.”

I stared at him. “Then you should at least know better than to end up hurting
yourself
, let alone Kate. It’s a little masochistic, don’t you think?”

He leaned toward me, anger tracing his brow. “And have you thought of the effects on Will? As each of your lifetimes passes, he’s still steady as stone for you. Yes, perhaps I will mourn Kate, but I will only ever mourn her once.”

He spun away from me, his anger washing away any trace of his charisma and smoothness. I turned away from the crowd to face the wall, and an awful sob escaped me. I rushed for the bathroom as the music and roar of the party came crashing down on my head.

Just as I got to the door, I felt a warm, strong hand on my bare arm.

“Ellie.”

I turned to face Will. His crystalline green gaze was compassionate and worried. “I’m fine,” I said sharply.

“No, you’re not.” He always knew.

I pulled away. “Don’t you care about yourself?”

He blinked in confusion. “What?”

“Never mind,” I said, putting my back to him, and I kept going.

“Ellie,” he called after me, following me. “You’re confusing me. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Did I do something wrong?”

I turned toward him and leaned against the wall beside the bathroom door. “Why do you do this to yourself? Torture yourself by staying as my Guardian?”

He leaned over me until I was drowning in him. “Ellie—”

“I know why you won’t be with me,” I said, straightening myself against the wall. “It’s not just that you’re afraid of Michael. It’s because the only way we can stay together is for me to die over and over again.”

Will closed his eyes and tightened his mouth without a response, but I knew what he was thinking. Rules he could break. Michael he could fight. He was most afraid that if he let down the wall he built up between us, then it would hurt too much to give in and love me as much as he ached to. If he did, I would still die regardless, and he would finally break.

I took a step back from him, and he let me go without protest. I didn’t look away from him until I was inside the bathroom. The door shut behind me and I locked it. My back hit the wall, and I slid to the floor and cried. I heard his fist pound once on the wall in anger, just outside the room. I didn’t want to end the night crying on the bathroom floor. It was so hard for me to see him every day and want him so badly, but yet again I had forgotten about how much it hurt him to feel the same way. It was so painful for us to be apart, but I didn’t know if either of us was strong enough to be together.

13

ON THE WAY HOME, WILL AND I SAID NOTHING TO each other, and I was glad for it. I parked in my driveway and shut the car off. Neither of us moved to get out, and my muscles just wouldn’t listen to my brain. I felt naked, silly, and ridiculous in this tiny dress and painful high heels, with all my makeup washed off my face. I pulled my hair out of its updo and shook it loose to cover my shoulders. It was barely midnight, but I felt like I’d been awake for days.