Winter of the Wolf (52 page)

As his arms closed around her, she breathed in his masculine scent of snowy mountains—the fragrance of safety, comfort, and love.

“I understand why you thought you had to come back

“I understand why you thought you had to come back here.” His voice turned to a low growl. “But if you ever do something so dangerous again, you’l find that Gerhard’s discipline was nothing.”

She rubbed her face against the crisp hair on his chest.

“Uh-huh. And you’l do what?”

He nipped the top of her ear in a stinging reprimand. “I’l bare your ass and pound on it.”

“Sounds like fun.” Zeb leaned forward and swatted her lightly. “Can we practice first?”

“There’s a thought.” Shay’s big hands massaged her bottom, lighting a warmth inside her. “Maybe after I rest a bit.”

“You too? Guess the Cosantir was right about being weaker in a city. And slower, dammit.” Zeb turned his arm over, examining the bite.

She stared at the torn flesh. “There’s no healer here.”

“Not the first time.” Not looking up, he poked at a spot, trying to shove the skin together. More blood trickled down his forearm.

He’d been hurt because of her. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, blinking as tears weled in her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

“What are a few more marks?” He picked up a strip of Tshirt.

She couldn’t stand to look, to see what she’d done to him.

He’d been hurt so many times before. She turned her back, He’d been hurt so many times before. She turned her back, and a sob escaped despite her efforts.

Zeb made a low noise of pain, and his chair scraped on the linoleum. Stepping in front of her, he set a finger under her chin and lifted her face. His eyes were dark and intent. “Do the scars bother you, little female?”

“Of course not,” she choked out.

“Then why the tears?” With his thumb, he wiped them from her cheeks and released her.

Didn’t he understand anything? “It’s my fault. And—” Horror rose inside her as she realized something else, remembered why she hadn’t told them anything. “Are you in trouble because you folowed me?” She looked at one man, then the other.
Have I ruined their lives
? “You can go back, can’t you?”

“No, mo leannan. You don’t defy a Cosantir and expect to live in his territory.” Shay folded a piece of shirt into a square. “I caled while you were in the shower. Rosie wil watch over the lodge until we return and make a formal break.”

The corner of Zeb’s mouth lifted. “We’l wait a few days to let his temper cool so maybe he won’t drop us dead in our tracks.”

Bree’s breath caught. “Don’t go back.”

“That wouldn’t be honorable.” Shay shook his head. “No, I think he’l just kick us out of his territory. Zeb was mostly I think he’l just kick us out of his territory. Zeb was mostly joking about him kiling us.”

“Mostly?” She shuddered, remembering the life draining from Klaus’s eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want either of you dragged into this.”

“Looks like you’d have done al right without us. You kiled yourself a helhound.” Shay gave her a thoughtful look.

“Knowing you, you had a plan.”

“Yeah, I was going to stack up furniture so when it broke through the patio door, it would have been funneled toward me in a straight direction. I figured that way I’d get a clear shot at its eyes.”

Zeb brushed his knuckles over her damp cheek. “Good plan. Fair chance of working.”

“Only I wouldn’t have had time to set up, not after the pickup broke down. So I’m glad you were here, but now the Cosantir wil—”

“Eric’s a cute kid,” Shay said, interrupting her. “And he might have been the next victim. Or you. We were where we needed to be.”

Zeb nodded agreement and handed her a cup of soup.

“Drink that while Shay wraps my arm.”

Trying not to cry, she forced herself to sip, as the men argued amiably over ways to tie the bandage. She’d totaly destroyed their lives. The pack would lose Shay as the alpha.

Zeb wouldn’t get to finish the cabins. The little brownies had Zeb wouldn’t get to finish the cabins. The little brownies had just moved into their lodge, now they’d have to move out again. Misery enveloped her, compressing her chest until she found it hard to breathe.

Laughing at one of Shay’s insults, Zeb glanced at her. His brows drew together. “Bree. What?”

“I’m sorry. So, so sorry.” She sniffled. How could she have hurt the people she loved best in the whole world?

“You can’t go back. I’ve ruined everything—the pack and the town and the brownies.”

“By the God, you’re a mess.” Zeb started to rise and stopped at a gesture from Shay.

Shay put his foot up on a chair and leaned on his thigh, contemplating her. “You’re not going to forgive yourself, are you?”

“How can I?” Under his steady gaze, she had to look away. “I should leave. Maybe if I go, then Calum wil—” A hand hit the table, making her jump. “No,” Zeb said in a deadly voice. “Don’t even consider it.”

“Look at me, Breanne.” Shay waited until she complied.

“It took me years to forgive myself for the mistakes I made as a pack leader. Finaly someone asked me how many people I had to save before I thought I’d evened the balance.” Shay rubbed his face. “I would have suffered anything, to escape that guilt.”

Mouth tight, Zeb nodded in understanding.

Mouth tight, Zeb nodded in understanding.

She understood. She’d ruined their lives, and she’d live with the remorse forever. “I’m sorry,” she whispered again.

“You should be. Because I’m furious.” Shay’s hand closed into a fist, and the knuckles cracked. She felt the pul of an alpha as his anger reverberated through her. “Not for trying to save a child, but that you didn’t trust us to help.” What could she say? She couldn’t let them get hurt. But—

“You feel bad because Zeb was hurt and the Cosantir might banish us, but that’s not why we’re angry. Not even close.” He studied her. “Until you get past the guilt, you won’t understand the rest.”

What did he mean? “I—”

“A good parent—or alpha—disciplines to teach,” Shay said. “As a cub, I didn’t understand how punishment could lessen anger and guilt. Or how after a punishment is done, the trail is wiped out. No tracks remain.”

She remembered the pain of Thyra’s discipline. Would they realy attack her? Savage her as wolves? But if it would make them feel better… She puled in a breath. “Okay. I can take it.”

Zeb straightened. “Shay, are you insane? You’d bite her?” A grim smile flitted over the alpha’s face. “Bite? No. This is going to be difficult though—I’ve never struck a female.” He sat on the bed. “Come here, Breanne.”

She hesitated. But whatever he wanted to do to her, she’d She hesitated. But whatever he wanted to do to her, she’d endure. When she stood beside him, he gripped the front of her T-shirt and puled her downward over his hard thighs.

He shoved the hem up to her waist and rubbed her bare bottom. Only then did she realize what he planned.
Spank
me
? Humiliation swept through her. “No!” She struggled.

He pinned her shoulders down. “Yes. I don’t want to do this, but you’re mired neck-deep in guilt. And not hearing what we’re saying.” His hand hit her lightly.

She heard Zeb growl.

“
Dùin do bhuel
.”

“Fuck your
shut up
and—”

“A bhràthair, she needs this.” Shay brought his hand down. Hard. The slap echoed against the wals, and her butt stung. “I wish someone had beaten the guilt from me back then.” Another slap, this time harder. And another.

“No!” When she kicked, he ruthlessly trapped her legs with his, then started spanking her in earnest. Blow after blow, one cheek, then the other. The stinging on her skin turned to burning, then to fire. It
hurt
. “You butthead!” As she fought back, she heard his voice, “…this is for not teling me. This is for not sharing the letter. This for lying to me. This is for not letting us protect you…” The red-edged pain grew and grew, and she started to cry. “This is for not alowing us to decide what we would risk or what we find to be important.”

When something jostled the bed, Shay paused.

When something jostled the bed, Shay paused.

Oh, thank God. Choking with sobs, she tried to rise up.

The ruthless hand on her back flattened her. She saw Zeb’s legs. He’d joined Shay.

“I get it now. But if I use my arm, I’l start to bleed again,” Zeb said.

“I’l hold her for you, a bhràthair.”

Zeb, too? His betrayal made her sob harder.

“I hate seeing you cry, Bree.” Zeb pushed her hair from her wet face with a gentle hand. “But I’m angry too. And I want you to understand why. Maybe this wil take away your guilt, so you can hear what we’re saying.” He didn’t wait for her agreement but moved to Shay’s other side.

He hit her. His palm was fuly as hard as Shay’s and more abrasive. Fresh pain firestormed over her skin.
Left, right
.

When he slapped the tops of her thighs, her fingernails dug into Shay’s jeans.

Slowly, Zeb rasped out what he was mad about: not coming to him with the problem, not caling when his truck broke down. Each blow seared her skin. “We’re together.

Al of us.”
Slap
. “Even if we take on the fucking world, we do it together.” Another blow. “We’re family, and you’l fucking understand that.”

Family
. They weren’t angry because they’d been hurt or would be banished, but because she hadn’t treated them as would be banished, but because she hadn’t treated them as family.
Us against the world
. Something inside her cracked, then blasted open, and warmth poured into places that had been cold and empty.

She could probably do anything to Zeb, and he wouldn’t care as long as she loved him. Calum had told her that Shay had planned to give up the pack for her. Because he loved her.
Family
.

God, she had a family. “We’re family,” she whispered, and somehow they heard her.

“Aye.”

“ ’Bout time.” Zeb’s voice sounded like ground glass.

Shay sighed and rubbed her burning bottom, making her hiss at the sting. “You’l have trouble sitting for a day or two.” He puled her up to sit on his lap. She jumped as the coarse material of his jeans rubbed her raw skin. “Easy, mo leannan.” He wrapped his arms around her.

She sagged against his chest, hating him. Hating them both for the pain—and she loved them more than life itself.

Eyes worried, Zeb cupped her face with his hands and kissed her damp cheeks. “Are you al right, little female?” His uncertainty helped. She hated them anyway, and she glared at him.

“Do you stil feel guilty?” Zeb’s grin flashed unexpectedly.

“Or should we pound on you longer?”

She bit back the rude word she’d learned from him. His She bit back the rude word she’d learned from him. His hands framed her face in warmth, keeping her from looking away.

“Breanne?” Shay prompted.

Darn them. Both of them. She puled in a breath and paused. The tightness was gone from her chest, and the heavy weight of guilt had lifted. Not al, but enough that she could accept she’d done the best she could. And hey, how could she know they felt so strongly? Not as if the terse cretins had ever told her.

Family.

She looked Zeb in the eyes. “It’s better.” And criminy, her butt hurt. Her brows drew together. “I’m not going to thank you though.”

Shay snorted. “I didn’t think you would. I never thanked an elder for a punishment when I was a pup.” A laugh rumbled through his chest. “But we’re not finished.

Completely.”

She yipped in alarm as he tumbled her onto the bed. He roled her onto her back and pinned her down with his hands on her shoulders. “Do you remember what happens to shifters when their female is in danger?” Shay’s eyes heated.

“Zeb and I need to reassure ourselves that you’re alive.” As Bree started to realize their intent, Zeb stripped off his jeans.

Chapter Thirty-eight

Shay’s hand burned from the spanking, so he could imagine how Breanne’s delicate ass felt. Guilt scraped his guts at having hurt a female.
My female
. But as he studied her, he saw her reddened eyes were no longer muddied with unhappiness.

He rubbed his cheek against hers, and she curled her arms around his neck. Thank the God, she was wiling. Seeing her facing the helhound had left him with an unfightable need to be inside her.

Bree pushed to a sitting position, puling the shirt down to cover herself. That wouldn’t last long, but he liked the way her ful breasts moved under the thin fabric.

“Now, we’l finish your punishment, Breanne,” Shay said, sitting beside her.

Her eyes widened, and he grinned.

Zeb merely raised an eyebrow, wiling to folow Shay’s lead.

“What?” Her voice was husky from crying, but he could smel the beginning of her arousal.

“You wil give in to whatever Zeb and I ask of you tonight.

Having nearly lost you, we’re going to be very, very Having nearly lost you, we’re going to be very, very demanding.”

She swalowed, and her nipples contracted. “I…that’s fair.”

“Good. Let’s lose the shirt.”

Zeb’s grin flashed, and he yanked her shirt off and tossed it on the floor.

Shay knelt on her other side and pushed her flat. By Herne’s bals, Breanne had gorgeous breasts. He ran his fingers over them, and she inhaled sharply. How soon could they have her moaning? He pinned her hands beside her head and took her mouth, gently at first, then hard.

He felt her jerk and squirm from whatever Zeb was doing.

She moaned and sucked on his tongue, teasing him with her own until he puled away. By the God, he needed to taste her elsewhere, to have her scent on him. “A bhràthair,” he said, his voice strained. “She needs something to suck on. Help her out.”

Zeb moved up on the bed and turned her face toward him.

“Little female, I want those lips around my cock.” Shay chuckled, delighted at how sweetly she opened her mouth. Zeb slid his cock in deep, his groan low and raspy.

Our mate
. Shay ran his hands down her body, teasing her nipples. Already reddened—Zeb had played with them.