With the Headmaster's Approval (12 page)

There was a moment’s stunned silence and then Barbara Crook said sweetly. “I wouldn’t mind standing guard next time.”

She was frowned into silence by Eleanor Stannard, but Jenna Murray turned a
furious face to Adam. “You think it’s amusing, don’t you?” There was a vicious undertone in her words. “You’ve not only humiliated her, you’ve also traumatised her. Don’t you know she used to be a nun?” When she saw the flash of contrition on his face she realised he hadn’t known. “I’m going to see if she’s all right,” she added, making for the door.

He put down his tea and was across the room in two strides. “No. I’ll go.”

“It’s all right. I can handle it.  She’s my friend,” Jenna said, her hand already on the door handle.

But his hand closed over her wrist. She started, as if touched by a cattle prod and her eyes flashed. With his grip still firmly on her wrist he repeated slowly. “I said, I’ll go.” For a brief moment their eyes locked, until Jenna let her gaze drop and he opened the door and was gone.

CHAPTE
R FIFTEEN

Annette
Woolf clutched her bible to her breast, mouthing the prayers she knew by heart. Through her open classroom door she heard the echo of his footsteps in the empty corridor long before they reached her. Not quick or heavy, but purposeful steps. How could she face him? How can you remove an image that is burned in your mind? A turmoil of forgotten emotions swirled in her brain.  She thought she’d removed them forever, but they were returning with frightening flashbacks.

He stood
towering over her. Chalk dust motes swirled about his head in the winter sunlight that streamed through the window. She couldn’t meet his eyes. She lowered her gaze, but now it was level with his groin and the image of his naked body returned, an image that blended with those of the other men; the ones who weren’t tall and handsome and well-proportioned. The ones who had wizened lollipops that came to life in her hands, and lollipops that nearly choked her. “You don’t want your mummy to know what you’ve been doing. She wouldn’t like it. Let’s keep it a secret. I promise I won’t tell her.”

It wasn’t her fault, she’d only been a child. But she should have knocked before going into the bathroom – perhaps
it had been her fault. A wave of nausea threatened to engulf her and she turned away.  As if he sensed her thoughts he dragged a chair up and straddled it, resting his arms on the back. He smelled of soap, and a lock of hair was already falling onto his brow.

“I apologise. I’m sorry about what happened,
” he said. “And then I made it worse by teasing you. I had no idea you were once a nun.” When she didn’t respond he continued. “I’m used to communal showers from being in the navy, and going for naked midnight swims as a teenager. It wasn’t a big deal for me.”  When she remained silent he added. “I’m very sorry if I’ve distressed you.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it was. I should have had a lock put on the door.”

He reached out
to take her hand. She watched his hand moving across the desk towards her. A man’s hand; a hand that could be both strong and tender. Long slim fingers with a few soft brown hairs and neat clean nails. A hand that could.... But it suddenly morphed into a fat ugly one with grubby nails. A hand that had taken hers and guided it towards the lollipop. No, No she mustn’t remember. She recoiled, shooting her hand into her lap to escape his. The secret must stay buried. She couldn’t handle it. Her breathing quickened, and her heart pounded painfully in her chest.

He withdrew his hand and she caught the fleeting hurt of rejection on his face and realised he was only trying to make amends.  “What is it? What’s wrong? Are you afraid of me?”

“No. Nothing’s wrong.”

“Please look at me.” He waited until she turned to face him. “There’s something else bothering you, isn’t there? Is it me you’re afraid of, or men? Is that why you became a nun?”

His eyes burned into her while he waited for an answer. 

“I can’t talk about it.”

“Can’t, or won’t?”

“Both. Either. I don’t know.” She clasped the bible to her chest, as if it could protect her.

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Okay. I realise I’m probably not the person you would want to open up to. But if you’re hiding some painful memory you should talk about it before it eats at your soul and destroys you.”

Was he talking from experience? She realised he was trying to help. But his painful memory was the loss of his wife and children – not a vile secret, like hers.

“Would you like me to get someone to take your class?” he asked.

“No. Thank you. I’ll be all right.”

Lisa was busy on the computer compiling reports when she felt Adam’s presence in the inter-leading doorway. When she looked up he was leaning against the doorpost with his thumbs in his pockets contemplating the carpet. She watched the play of emotions on his face and waited for him to speak.

He finally looked up. “I suppose you heard.”

“Yes. Jenna came in to ask that a sign be made for the shower door, or you get a lock put on it.”

He sighed. “I think I blew it.”

“It wasn’t your finest moment,” she said, smiling. It was the first time she’d seen him looking vulnerable, like a naughty boy waiting to be scolded. “Perhaps it was an error of judgement, but you didn’t know Annette was a former nun.”

“No, I didn’t. It’s my fault for not reading her CV and file. But I didn’t want to pre-judge anyone.” He came over and sat on the desk next to her.  She wished he wouldn’t do that. It was unsettling having him so close, with his leg only inches from her hand on the mouse pad. His trousers were taut across his thighs and she was embarrassingly aware of the bulge in his crotch and struggled to erase the mental image of what Annette had seen. It reminded her of the tailor asking Neil, “On which side do you dress, sir?”

“I think Miss Woolf was more than just embarrassed,” he said.

“Why do you think that? It must have been quite distressing for her.”

“Distressing, maybe. But she seemed traumatised.” He went over to the filing cabinet. “You’d better let me have her file.”

Lisa pulled out the file on Annette Woolf and handed it to him. He took it to his desk and began reading it. After scrutinizing it for a while he closed it and with a puzzled frown returned it to the filing cabinet. “There’s nothing in there about any kind of trauma, just her schooling and work history. She went straight to a convent after school.”

He leaned on the filing cabinet in thought. “Who is she close to? Is there anyone she might open up to?”

Lisa thought for a while. “It seems a strange match, but Jenna is the one she spends the most time with. I don’t know if they see each other outside school hours, but I think it would be unlikely.”

“They do seem to have one thing in common,” he said.

“What’s that?”

“Misandry. Unless it’s just me they both hate.”

“Annette Woolf doesn’t hate you, Adam. I don’t think she’s capable of hating anyone. She’s not used to men and she may be wary of them, but I’m sure she doesn’t hate you.”

“And what about Jenna?
She can Taser me with her tongue. I took the job that should have been hers. Does she hate me for that, or is there more to it?”

“Jenna doesn’t hate men either; she just doesn’t have a need for them,” she said. And then considering her words carefully she continued, “This isn’t general knowledge, but I don’t think it’s a secret. Jenna told us that she had been born a twin, she had a brother, but he died only a few hours after their birth due to some complication. Her father, who had been desperate for a son, was devastated. It seems that he never got over his disappointment and was always cold and distant towards her because she had lived and his son had died. He treated her younger sister the same way. It made Jenna what she is – proud, independent, resilient and not needing to rely on anyone, especially a man. However, her sister went in the opposite direction and sought the affection of men by becoming promiscuous. Jenna tried to shield her, but I don’t think they are particularly close.”

“That explains a lot,” he said, rubbing his chin. “Please find out when she’s available, and have her come to see me.”

She was about to leave when she turned back. “Adam,” she said. “Please be careful how you speak to Jenna. She has no reason to be cooperative. Only the governing body can hire and fire teachers and she’s been at the school for a number of years and the board members have a lot of respect for her, while you’re only on a one
-year contract. Where you can’t discipline, you’ll have to cajole.”

“I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

She was almost at her desk when he called after her, “And please have Fred Smith put a lock on the shower door.”

Lisa got in touch with Jenna who agreed to meet with Adam before the afternoon break.

He stood up when she entered the office and motioned to the chair in front of his desk. “Please sit down, Miss Murray. There’s something I’d like to discuss with you.” He waited until she was seated, and then sat down and shifted his chair forward. Looking directly at her he confessed sheepishly, “I know I acted like a complete jerk.”

“What do you mean?”

He looked at her steadily. “You’re not going to make this easy for me, are you?” he said, a hint of impatience creeping into his tone.

She returned his fixed gaze. “Make what easy?”

“Goddammit, Jenna, you know damn well what I mean.”

She sat in stony-faced silence.

“I’m sorry,” he said contritely. “Can you please stop punishing me and co-operate. I’m concerned about Miss Woolf and I believe you are friendly with her.”

“I think I could call myself a friend.”

“I need you to talk to her.”

“You
need
me to?”

Adam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I would appreciate it if you could talk to her – please.  I believe that some past emotions have surfaced that she is having difficulty dealing with. If left to fester they might only get worse. I think counselling could help her.”

“Some people cope better if secrets lay buried.”

“Secrets are almost always unhealthy,” he said, his eyes meeting hers. “Past hurts should be exorcised.”

“I suppose you’re now going to suggest that a trouble shared is a trouble halved.”

“There’s a
fundamental truth in most clichés.”

“Actually, I
think you’ll find it’s an idiom,” said Jenna, smiling.

Lisa could hear the exchange of words and thought;
sparks don’t fly like that between two people unless there is an underlying emotion at play.

“Are we going to quote platitudes to each other, or are you willing to do something constructive to help Miss Woolf?” he said. “Is it too much for you to believe that I genuinely care and want to help her?”

“I’m sorry,” said Jenna. “If there is something bothering Annette of course I’d be willing to help. I sometimes give her a lift home. She might be willing to talk in surroundings where she feels safe.”

“Thank you. Please let me know if there is anything I, or the school can do, such as provide counselling. If she prefers to keep it private please assure her that no one will pry.”

Jenna’s gentle probing finally elicited a confession from Annette Woolf. She
’d been sexually molested by her step-father and his friends from the age of seven until twelve when he’d been killed in a drunken car accident. Terrified that his friends would come back when they were on night-shift and her mother was out, she had told no one. Her step-father had instilled so much guilt and fear into her that she could never bring herself to tell anyone of her ordeal and had hidden behind a wall of shame, afraid of any man in her vicinity.

Jenna persuaded her to speak to the school counsellor who recommended therapy
and she was finally able to share her secret with the staff. The school counsellor asked if she would be prepared to train as a therapist to help other girls going through the same torment and Annette agreed to think about it.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

The damp foggy weather and slate skies
continued into the term, but the bright yellow of the girls’ school blouses did something to lift the gloom by bringing a little sunshine into the school, even if the blouses were partly covered by their burgundy school blazers. The head girl and deputy head girl wore blazers with yellow and burgundy rope flashes on their lapels and cuffs, so they were easily recognisable when they tapped on Lisa’s open door. They asked her for an appointment with Adam.

“I’ll see when he’s available,” she said, going into
his office.

“Adam, the head girl and deputy head g
irl would like a word with you. Is it convenient now?”

He glanced at his watch. “I can give them fifteen minutes.”

Lisa showed them in and Adam stood and gestured for them to sit down while she sat in a chair to one side knowing he didn’t want to be alone with any of the girls unless there were at least three of them. “What can I do for you, ladies?”

The girls exch
anged nervous looks before the head girl spoke. “Sir, the girls have a request for you.”

“All the girls?”

“Actually, the senior girls.”

He leaned back in his chair. “And what are the senior girls requesting?”

“We – they – were thinking – would like to propose - that we hold a Valentine’s Dance with the boys’ school,” she finished in a rush.

He was silent while he looked at each of them in turn, slowly twisting
his pen between his fingers.

Lisa smiled when she saw that both girls had their fingers crossed in their laps. This wasn’t a new request and had always been turned down in the past, but it was new to Adam and she wa
nted to see how he would handle it.

“So it’s a proposal,” he finally said.

“Yes, Sir.”

“Then I also have a proposal for you. I want you to convince me why you think it’s a good idea to hold this dance.”

The girls were anticipating a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’. This totally unexpected response left them unsure how to reply and they remained mute.

“We’ll make it a team speaking assignment as part of the life skills progr
amme.  I’ll ask Mr Shaw if his head boy and deputy head boy will be prepared to work on it with you. There are certain guidelines for team speaking, the most important of which is to work as a team. You can do the presentation in front of the senior girls and staff. If you can come up with a convincing argument I’ll consider giving it my approval, as long as Mr Shaw also agrees.”

“Th... tha
nk you Mr Wild,” stammered the head girl, with mixed feelings. How had a simple request suddenly become a homework assignment?

“Will that be all?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Then you may go.”

Lisa waited until they’d left before asking, “Would you really be prepared to hold a dance with the boys’ school?”

“I
don’t see why not. If Kirsty were here I’d rather she be at a supervised dance than up to mischief where I couldn’t keep an eye on her. Have Eleanor Stannard liaise with Don Shaw about it.”

“Eleanor?’ queried Lisa.

“Yes. She’s speech and drama - or do you think Barbara Crook would be more suitable?” he said with a grin.

“I’ll arrange it will Eleanor right away,” she quickly replied, returning the grin.

Eleanor Stannard
had not been entirely sure about the meeting with Don Shaw. She was accustomed to the schools remaining autonomous with the kitchen forming a sort of Berlin Wall between them, Adam being the only one who passed through it. But the meeting had been arranged in the girls’ school library during the last period and she was obliged to concur and she and Don Shaw had exchanged ideas on team speaking.

After they’d
agreed on the rules they summoned the head girl and head boy, who eyed each other warily - unsure about their collaboration, but with pen and paper ready to make notes. If the dance were to go ahead they would probably be expected to partner each other.

“The first speaker will outline the problem,”
explained Don Shaw. “It’s up to you to choose who will be the first speaker. The second speaker will expand on the problem and fill in the details from the boys’ point of view. The third speaker will fill in the details from the girls’ point of view. The fourth speaker will propose a solution – and this is important – it’s a solution that the pupils will implement. We don’t want to hear a solution that involves something the teachers will be expected to do.”

“There will be a time limit on each speech,” added Eleanor Stannard. “The first speaker will have four minutes. Speakers two and three will each have three minutes. The final speaker will have five minutes. We’ll expect you to be ready in two weeks. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Mrs Stannard,” they chorused.

The
pupils from both schools were eager to offer their opinions on what points should be made at the presentation and the speakers had to filter out the bizarre and ridiculous suggestions before getting down to the main theme. The prefects worked together with the speakers on the basic outline. Both schools were depending on them for a favourable outcome.

The presentation took place on a Friday afternoon in the girls’ assembly hall. The senior boys and girls filed in eagerly and sat behind the teachers in the front rows. The whispering and shuffling of feet stopped when Eleanor Stannard took to the stage and began the proceedings. It was then left to the speakers to introduce each other.

The head g
irl spoke first and outlined the problem of teenagers having no safe environment where they could get to know each other. They were too young for pubs and nightclubs, and parents frowned on groups of teenagers hanging around in the streets. The deputy head boy expanded on the problem by explaining that boys have nowhere to go to learn how to dance and were then shy to ask girls out. Dance lessons were populated by the oldies (and here he drew some laughter by describing oldies as anyone over twenty-five). The responsibility of expanding on the problems the girls faced was left to the deputy head girl who said they were sometimes asked out by boys a lot older than themselves and were pressured to go to pubs and other venues where they did not feel comfortable. A joint dance where they could meet boys their own age would make them more comfortable.

Finally it was the turn of the head b
oy to disclose their solution. The proposal was that a joint dance be held on a Friday evening from seven until ten o’clock for senior pupils only. When the dance was over the girls would be escorted home by family, or an adult friend. The prefects would be responsible for monitoring pupil behaviour, and here he paused before saying, “So there would be no need for teachers to be present,” which was met by raised eyebrows from the teachers. There would be soft drinks only, and in cans so that no one could interfere with them. Snacks would be made by the girls and drinks provided by the boys. Arrangements would be made for a staff-approved DJ. Costs and amounts had been calculated and the ticket price would cover these. The prefects would decorate the hall and would appoint pupils to help with the clean-up the following morning.

When the final speaker had finished and sat down with a relieved smile there was an enthusiastic round of applause from the pupils
, and a few whistles from the boys, which caused turned heads and disapproving frowns from the teachers.

Adam took to the stage and thanked them for the presentation. The teachers would discuss it and
announce their decision at assembly on Monday morning. There was a groan of disappointment that they would have to wait over the weekend, but at least they hadn’t been given a ‘no’.

The whole school sat in expectant anticipation during the Monday morning assembly. Adam waited until the last announcement to give them his decision.

“And now what you’ve all been waiting for,” he said, pausing while they all sat eagerly forward. “After considering your proposal and having a lengthy discussion with the staff of both schools we’ve decided to let you go ahead with a joint dance.”

There was a collective cheer and high fives for the speakers until Adam put up his hand to silence them. “However, there are some conditions that you might not like. Firstly, contrary to your proposal, the teachers will be there to monitor behaviour.” They had been expecting that, so it came as no surprise. “Secondly, I don’t want any competing for the best-dressed so you will all wear your school uniforms.”

This time there was a collective groan of
horror and disappointment. “However, you will be allowed to wear make-up,” Adam continued. “Those are the conditions. If you wish to go ahead you can start making plans.”