Without care (6 page)

Read Without care Online

Authors: Kam Carr

Tags: #love, #youngadult, #younglove, #kamcarr

 

“Okay” I weakly
smile getting up from my chair and following him over to the table.
I can feel eyes burning into me. This is a weird occurrence in the
cafeteria. People don't normal sit with others outside their
groups. I almost want to shout, “Its just lunch!” but I remain
quiet. High school sometimes feels like an alternate universe.

 

I sit down, and
Chase takes a seat next to me. Without warning his hand grabs mine
and once again I feel that heat I felt on Saturday. Now I am too
scared to even look or talk to him.

 

“I just wanted
to explain about Saturday night” his eyes are locked on our
intertwined hands. “I did want to kiss you badly, but I just want
to do this right. I don't want to be forceful or look like a
complete dick!”

 

His choice of
words makes me laughs, I am now relaxing in his presence, and my
eyes look up at his face. He is slightly blushing, and all my
insides melt. His blue eyes lock with mine and he gives a breath
taking smile.

 

“Can we try
again?” I nod. “Good. A group of us are heading to the beach on
Saturday, and I want you to come. Will you?”

 

“The beach?” I
play with the word. The idea of going to a beach fills me with
dread. The beach involves swimwear, which means HE will see me in
swimwear. Seriously, I can't refuse. I take in a deep breathe.
“Yes.”

 

A massive smile
grows across his face and his hand tightens on mine. “Great, I
promise you will love it, Jen.” He quickly looks around, then leans
over and kisses me sweetly on the cheek. “I'll talk to you later.”
He kisses my cheek again, gets up and walks off towards the exit
door. I can't stop my eyes from following, before he leaves he
turns and waves.

 

I feel giddy
and so happy. After spending all that time thinking he would tell
everyone and cause me harm, I now know he isn't like that. A huge
weight has left my shoulders, and I can't stop smiling. Saturday at
the beach with him is sounding better by the second, even if it
does involve me wearing a swim suit.

 

School is over
for the day, and I make my way home. I still haven't spoken to
Becks, even though it has all worked in my favour. I'm still angry
that she thinks she has the right to tell everyone my secrets.

 

“Jen,” I look
up and see Ayden leaning against his truck. Oh, now he finally
talks to me! I'm surprise Becks isn't following him like a stray
dog. My legs defy me and I end up walking in his direction. I let
out a groan of annoyance as I watch the smug expression swipe
across his face.

 

“What?” I
mutter, by fingers playing with the strap of my rucksack. He
refuses to answer and I stare blankly at him. I am beginning to get
annoyed. “What do you want, Ayden?”

 

He stands up
straight and towers over me. “I thought you could help me with the
maths homework.”

 

“And why would
I do that?”

 

“Because we're
friends and that's what friends do.”

 

“I'm pretty
sure Becks would be more than willing to help you with homework.”
My voice hisses her name, she is meant to be my friend or vice
versa, I'm not sure. It’s just since lunch time I can't bare to
look or speak to her. That's really bad, considering how nice she
has been to me since I moved here. At first I thought I was mad
because she told my secrets but now... I don't know.

 

He snorts.
“Becks and maths?” He tilts his head to the side and rolls his
eyes. “Seriously? Come, we will go to your place.”

 

“Can I refuse?”
I dryly reply, waking round to the other side of the truck.

 

“No!” He smiles
and gets in - Looks like we’re doing homework at my house. Great,
he is going to meet my mother. Oh lords have mercy on my soul!

 

We are lost in
our maths homework. He doesn't need my help which I knew all along.
Maybe he didn't want to go home and be lonely. My mother is playing
her favourite role at the moment, bringing us cookies and soda. She
keeps lingering much longer than she should and she is putting me
on edge.

 

At least she is
covered up today and she keeps calling me 'honey'. She never calls
me honey. Seriously, this woman is beginning to make me dizzy with
all these mood changes. I know it’s all an act, why can't she just
be herself. Maybe I should do some research, maybe she has a
personality disorder.

 

“Are you Jen's
boyfriend?” Lacey is now sat at the table.

 

“Lacey!” My
face is bright red and my jaw almost hits the table. I can't
believe how embarrassing my little sister is. Okay, it was funny
when she did it to my mother, but not to me. Why has she got this
fascination with boyfriends all of a sudden?

 

“Jen, relax”
Ayden laughs, he turns all his attention to Lacey. “Yes, Lacey, I
am Jen's boyfriend. I am a boy and she is my friend.”

 

“Dur!” Lacey
rolls her eyes. “I know what boyfriend means.” She sits back in her
chair and crosses her arms. “My friend Sally says her big sister
has a boyfriend and they kiss a lot.”

 

“We don't kiss”
I quickly add. “That's a different sort of boyfriend.”

“Yeah, Jen
saves that for Chase.”

 

“You kissed
Chase?” It’s now my mother's voice talking and she sounds too
happy. I glare over at Ayden, who is suddenly absorbed in his
homework.

 

“No, mother, I
didn't” I forcefully say. Great, now I can't concentrate on my
homework. I let out a deflated sigh and I notice Ayden trying to
hide a smile. He's laughing at me and I have a great idea on how to
wipe that smile off his face.

 

“Although,” I
begin. “I might kiss him this Saturday at the beach.” My mother
starts jumping on the spot in with excitement. Ayden has dropped
his pen, eyes wide and mouth open. Lacey is pretending to be sick.
I stand up in triumph. “Oh well, looks like homework can wait. I
have work!”

 

The next few
hours are spent at the Diner I actually have a spring in my step.
The vision of Ayden's shocked face is something I can't stop
laughing at. I sing along to the juke box as I collect baskets and
glasses. I help Carl clean up and then its time to head home.

 

I know my
mother is going to go crazy with excitement the minute I walk
through the door. No doubt she is going to insist helping me out
with bathing suits and tips on kissing boys. I have this weird
feeling she has waited my whole life for this. She will probably
see it as passing on her wisdom.

 

“So, the beach
this Saturday with Chase.” I look up and Ayden is sitting on our
porch step.

 

“Yep” I smile.
“What are you still doing here?”

 

He shrugs and
gets to his feet. “Your mother insisted I had dinner with her and
Ted.” He stands right in front of me, his eyes not looking anywhere
but at me. I feel slightly small as he towers over me, my heart
races and his scent invades my senses. Our eyes are locked and
unintentionally I feel myself licking my bottom lip. What? Now I
want him to kiss me? I close my eyes and break that connection.
Just like I told Lacey, we are friends that don't kiss. Besides, he
has a thing for Becks.

 

“I'll see you
at school tomorrow” my eyes fling open and now he is next to his
truck. I am still panting, what is wrong with me? I give a little
wave and race into my house. I must never respond to him like that
again. It was a stupid thought, but why did my body act that way?
Why do I get jealous when I think of him with Becks? Maybe I have
inherited my mother’s crazy gene after all.

 

CHAPTER
FIVE

 

Saturday
arrives, and I am a bundle of nerves. I can't even manage to eat
breakfast. My hands shake as I pack a bag ready for the beach. I
look up at the clock and I have exactly five minutes before Chase
picks me up.

 

I adjust the
straps on my yellow sundress and place a strand of hair behind my
ears. Now I think maybe I should change into trousers. I shake my
head, the reason I choose the dress was to wear my swimsuit
underneath. That is still making me cringe. Chase is going to see
me in a two piece. I know my body is okay, it’s just some times I
wish I was little curvier like my mother.

 

The doorbell
rings and before I get a chance to get there I can hear my mothers
voice. “Well, hello, Chase. Jen has told me so much about you.”

 

I rush to the
door and glare at her. Chase is stood smiling at my mother in his
normal outstanding way. My mother is smiling back and fluttering
her eyelashes. Gross! I push her out of the way. I quickly hurry my
goodbyes and leave. I grab Chase's arm and pull him away from my
mother.

 

“Bye Honey” she
calls behind me. What is with all this honey business?

 

“She seems
nice” he says as we walk towards his shiny silver convertible BMW.
The car screams wealth and I take an instant dislike to it. “Is
your mother always that friendly?” He asks as he opens the
passenger door for me. Is he trying to be funny? I don't answer and
get into the car. My whole body sinks into leather seat.

 

Now we are
alone in the car I once again feel nervous. I watch him climb in
and start up the engine. My eyes take him in, his blonde hair isn't
gelled today and he is dressed in shorts and a baggy T-shirt.
Typical surfer, the white T-shirt brings out his golden sun kissed
skin. I swallow hard as his eyes drift over to me.

 

“You look
pretty today, Jen.” His pushes that loose strand of hair behind my
ear. My cheeks flush bright red and I squirm in the seat. How am I
going to get through a whole day with him? I take in a deep breath
and just smile.

 

The beach is
filled when we get there, a few faces I recognize from school.
People sunbathing, some surfing, a group have got a barbeque going
and I also notice most people have a drink in their hands. I get
out of the car and follow Chase, when his friends see him they all
cheer. However, their eyes look at me. I guess they’re probably
trying to figure out what I am doing here.

 

“Hey” it's
Chrissy Cartwright that races to us. She is smiling at me and it
looks guinine. I can't help but look at the tiny two pieces she is
wearing. She looks amazing and now there is no way I am taking off
my dress with her around.

 

Without warning
she pulls me into a hug and I am taken back. “I’m really glad Chase
invited you.” she says as she pulls away. “He has been driving us
nuts.”

 

I look over at
Chase and he’s flushed bright red. He grabs hold of my hand and
pulls me away from the friendly Chrissy. I know I am smiling. He’s
been driving his friend’s nuts...How? Does he talk about me? I feel
the flutter of butterflies in the pit of my stomach. We come to a
halt and Chase sits down pulling me with him.

 

“I'm sorry
about Chrissy” he smiles and his thumb brushes the palm of my hand.
“She has been begging me to ask you out. She knows I really like
you.”

 

“Its okay” I
smile, my voice is very breathy. He slowly turns to face me and my
eyes lock on his lips. I quickly turn away, there is no way I am
messing up this time. I have managed to of gotten a second chance
and Chase likes me. Wow!

 

“Jen,” his
finger brushes along my cheek and my head turns in his direction.
He is closer now, I can smell his scent and my heart beats fast. I
swear if he doesn't kiss me now I am going to combust.

 

“May I?” I nod,
my breathing slowly getting heavier.

 

He leans
forward and softly brushes his lips against mine. I close my eyes
and welcome the sensations. His lips are soft, his hand moves up in
my hair and I swear I let out a little moan as he steals another
kiss. Without warning he is gone and I want to grab him and pull
him back. I slowly open my eyes and he is smiling back at me.

“Wow” he lets
out a little air from his mouth. “Amazing” he kisses me on the
cheek and jumps up.

“You wanna go
for a swim?”

 

Eugh! Just when
everything was going well, he has to bring up the swimsuit subject.
I look around the beach and it seems everyone is wearing swimsuits.
No one else seems to care, so why do I?

My eyes wonder
a little more and then it feels like something has hit me hard in
the chest.

 

My jaw drops
open and I can't stop blinking. What is he doing here? Becks is sat
right beside him looking fab in her swimsuit. All of a sudden I
feel competitive knowing I would look much better. As if he can
sense me, he looks over and waves. He has that smug look on his
face. I wave back and get to my feet. I don't what he is playing
at, but if you can't beat them, join them.

 

I take in a
deep breath and pull my dress over my head revealing my black
binki. I look over at Chase, his eyes are wide and he is just
staring at me. He must like what he sees. I then turn and look at
Ayden. He shrugs his shoulders and mouths, 'nice'. What an arrogant
bastard! Becks rolls her eyes and lays back down.

 

I bet no one
even invited them here. I am not going to allow them to ruin my day
or my date with Chase. I have dreamt about this for the last few
months. I walk over to Chase and for some reason I wrap my arms
around his neck. He instantly pulls me against his body and his
lips find mine again.

 

Right in the
middle of the beach we start kissing. I can hear a few people
cheering and then Chrissy yells “Finally!”

 

As I pull away,
I feel embarrassed but slightly proud of my bold move. Chase is
grinning from ear to ear. He looks like he has won the lottery or
something. I turn on my heel and walk towards the sea, my hips
swaying from side to side. For some unknown reason I look over my
shoulder and Ayden is staring at me. His eyes narrowed his mouth
tight and all my insides melt. Was he the reason I just did
that?

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