Read Yom Kippur as Manifest in an Approaching Dorsal Fin Online
Authors: Adam Byrn Tritt
Yom Kippur as Manifest in
an Approaching Dorsal Fin
Yom Kippur
as Manifest in an
Approaching
Dorsal Fin
Adam Byrn Tritt
SMITHCRAFT
P R E S S
Copyright © 2013 by Adam Byrn Tritt. All rights
reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
“Burial,” p. 29, was previously published in the author’s
The Phoenix and the Dragon: Poems of the Alchemical
Transformation
(Smithcraft Press, 2007).
ISBN 978-1-62927-001-2
Smithcraft Press
1921 Michels Drive NE
Palm Bay, FL 32905
www.SmithcraftPress.com
Contents
Dedication . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . vii 3:10 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Yom Kippur as Manifest in
an Approaching Dorsal Fin . . . . . . 3
Burial . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29
Funeral, Expurgated . . . . . . . . . . . 35
Passover and the
Industrial Revolution. . . . . . . . . 85
The Harmony of Broken Glass . . . . . 93
Fifty Years. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .113
Yahrzeit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .115
What Do Jews Do on Christmas? . . 147
About the Author. . . . . . . . . . . . .151
v
and to my family,
especially the ones who
no longer talk to me,
because it is from them
that I have learned the most.
vii
3:10
It is 3:10 am
And I’m
Wrestling with Hashem
Over matters of love
And propriety,
Over poetry
And the small matter
Of whether he exists.
Hashem states
It is if little consequence
And I say, Hashem,
People fight and die,
Live, love, kill and
Become kind
In your name
And Hashem argues
Atheists do the same
But are, at least,
Honest in their motives.
1
Yom Kippur
as Manifest in an
Approaching
Dorsal Fin
It is Yom Kippur. A Monday. I have taken
the day off work to walk, meditate, think.
I have taken the day off work so I could
go to temple the night before and not worry
about the time, the hour, how late it was get-
ting, when I would need to get up.
We asked our friends to go with us. In our
back yard, playing with clay, our conversa-
tion set on cognates and religion. I men-
tioned the Buddha of compassion, Amitabha,
and the other name for him, Amida. How
the Amidah is the name of a prayer of com-
passion during Yom Kippur. How it relates
to the fruit, almonds, as the ancient Hebrews
3
Adam Byrn Tritt
saw the almond as a symbol for watchful-
ness, promises, and redemption. How the
part of the brain which we know to be the
seat of our ability to see things in a global,
compassionate way is called the amygdala,
from the Greek
amugdalē
, meaning almond.
Craig started talking about the Kol Nidre
prayer and, being Craig, translated it for us
and we sat, transfixed, as often we do listen-
ing to Craig. Lee, Evanne, Beth, and I, listen-
ing to Craig.
Of course we listen to Craig. He, translator
of dead languages. He, who juggles biblical
text back and forth from language to lan-
guage, from meaning to meaning as if the pas-
sages are but palm-sized bean bags. He, of
three books of translations. Yes, we listen
when he speaks.
As we talked, we discovered he had never
been to temple, had never actually listened
to the Kol Nidre. Neither had Beth, nor
Evanne—and that, of course, was not a sur-
prise, growing up in the Midwest: Ohio and
Nebraska, Methodist. Right then, we asked
if they’d like to go with us this Yom Kippur,
4
Yom Kippur as Manifest . . .
to the Kol Nidre service: the only one we
go to.
They were surprised. Craig said he was hon-
ored. Evanne agreed with a clear look of shock
on her face. Beth asked if we’re sure it was
OK and told us how special it was to be asked,
how appreciated it was.
That was months ago. We asked the small,
local temple if we could come and bring three
guests. No problem. May we have their
names, and do they have any departed they
would like Yizkor candles for? Yes. We were
set to go.
Erev Yom Kippur arrives. Lee is under the
weather and cannot go. She asks that I go any-
way and I resist but she does not want to dis-
appoint our friends.
Evanne worries whether she should have
her hair covered. Beth is concerned she looks
like “a goy.” Lee tells her, jokingly, that she
should proudly announce she is a shiksa. I
suggest against it and let them know it is an
honor that they are going and the congrega-
tion would be overjoyed they are there.
They are worried. No need to dress well,
not for this congregation. But they do, and
5
Adam Byrn Tritt
Beth’s high heels put her so high above me she
has to bend over and I must tip myself up on
my toes to kiss her on the cheek.
Both wear black, notice their shoes are
made of leather, and point out they have worn
black once they discover the color of the holy
day is white. No one will be following all these rules. No one will notice.
Evanne, married, wears a scarf on her head,
long and flowing, tied into her hair, nearly as
long, nearly to her thighs. She could be Golda
and Tevye’s shorter, forgotten daughter. She
could be from the shtetle. No one will guess
she isn’t Jewish. Beth actually looks Jewish
and no one tells her this. How to explain what
that looks like?
Craig fits in perfectly but is wearing shoes
for the first time in, perhaps, more than a year.
I offer him one of my tallit (prayer shawls)
and a kipa I think will fit him well, gold and
silver. He tells me again he is honored to be
invited and I am privileged to give him my
tallis to wear.
We arrive, are greeted, take prayer books,
and I search for a large print version, find one, enter, find a place in the pews close to the
6
Yom Kippur as Manifest . . .
front. Myself, Evanne, Beth, and Craig. I leave
space to my right, where Lee would sit, where
I would be able to see her.
We talk, discuss translation, Craig notices
the Kol Nidre in the prayer book is not trans-
lated literally and, a game of telephone, shows
me the text clues by showing Beth who shows
Evanne who shows me, differences in font,
serif versus sans serif, that tell a careful reader what is a translation and what is a
paraphrase.
This congregation, Mateh Chaim, has as
yet no home. And yet we have been welcomed
even though we swell their ranks and the
available room. Even though there are non-
Jews among us who need not be here. The
congregation is growing and hopes to have a
home, but there is, in thoughtful congrega-
tions, a balance between the need for a build-
ing and the needs of community: the under-
standing that an edifice takes money which
many of the people here tonight don’t have.
It is the only congregation in Palm Bay. It
meets tonight in a Methodist church. Behind
the portable ark, containing the Torah, is a
7
Adam Byrn Tritt
twenty-foot cross. It is not the building that
makes a congregation.
I do not mind this so much. We talk, qui-
etly, as we would before any service. Evanne
tells us she is glad to see me misbehaving as
usual as it puts her at ease.
“Misbehaving?” I ask. She answers I have
said “ass” twice since sitting down in the pews.
She says it like this: “You said a-$-$ twice
since sitting your a-$-$ down.” Silly. Anglo
Saxon not allowed for a Methodist?
I think, momentarily, of our Yom Kippur
in North Carolina. We were alone. No one
around us had an understanding. I listened
to Kol Nidre on Internet radio.
Joel Fleishman had a similar experience on
the television program
Northern Exposure
in an episode called “Shofar, So Good” (1994)
when, on Yom Kippur, he was visited by
Rabbi Schulman. Our program opens with
Joel, physician to Cicely, Alaska, carbo-load-
ing in preparation for his day of fasting. He
is attempting to explain Yom Kippur to the
ever-interested residents as they eat at the
Brick, the inn and tavern, and has little suc-
cess. This is mostly because he has only a ten-
8
Yom Kippur as Manifest . . .
uous, superficial understanding himself. He
knows the words, he knows the rules and pro-
scriptions, takes care to keep the fast, not
wash, not to care for personal convenience,
to give the day up to feeling keenly, sharply
one’s place in the world and relationship to
God and our fellows. He sees the holiday as
a noun with a set of rules, not a verb with a
set of tools. To Joel, it is no longer a living tradition, and he does not know what to do with
it. On top of this, he is lonely for those who
know his tradition.
Our Good Doctor Joel, while in the midst
of his fast, was visited by the Good Rabbi
Schulman who, as surprised as Joel, was lifted
by a shaft of light and deposited in Cicely to
help Joel understand what Yom Kippur is
really about, and Dr. Fleishman begins the
process of making amends. It is a journey, a
Hebrew Dickensian vision quest, which starts
with the Good Rabbi occupying the space of
the top head of a totem pole. Jews, after all,
are tribal too.
Not too surprisingly, the characters on the
show who understand Yom Kippur best are
the shamans.
9
Adam Byrn Tritt
But I am not alone and I revel in this. Craig
tells us the history of the Kol Nidre. The
actual translation, the “Kol Nidre contro-
versy” surrounding just what the proper place
and ramification of the prayer is.
Kol nidre
means “all vows,” and it absolves us of vows and promises made that we needed
to make to survive but knew were wrong. It
apologizes and gives release from the many
times we said Yes when we wanted to say No,
but did not because our jobs, food on the
table, roofs over our heads, our safety, our
security meant we had to say one thing, do
one thing, when another was what we knew
was proper.
He explains, my teaching middle school is
my Kol Nidre. My giving grades, requiring
students to do what they have no desire to,
that is my Kol Nidre. When I teach them to
pass a test when they want to learn creativ-
ity, that is my Kol Nidre. When I do that
which I must to put bring food and security,
when I do not call those around me on their