Zombie CSU (23 page)

In general terms, the left brain deals with logic and analytical ideas while its counterpart deals with imagination and abstract ideas. (If one side of the brain is injured, it affects the other.) So, someone with an injury to the right hemisphere of the brain might not be able to make correlative thoughts: They might see a wall and not comprehend that they need to find a door to get through it, and instead they try to walk through it. Injure the left side of the brain, and a person might lose the ability to solve complex problems.

Human movement is controlled by a part of the motor cortex called the motor strip (or precentral gyrus). Often stroke victims will have some damage to that portion of the brain and lose function in certain parts of the body. Injure the left hemisphere, and the right side of the body will be affected, and vice versa. This is why half of a person’s face sometimes droops following a stroke.

The cerebellum, a cauliflower-shaped structure located just above the brainstem, is the part of the brain governing the higher functions of motion, including posture, balance, and coordination; there is some research indicating that it contributes to some non-motor functions such as active thought (cognition) and emotion. This part of the brain comprises only 10 percent of the brain’s total mass but contains half of the total neurons.

Damage or dysfunction to the cerebellum can result in cerebellar ataxia: ataxia (gross incoordination of muscle movements causing jerky rather than smooth muscular movement), hypotonia (poor muscle tone), asynergy (lack of coordination), dyschronometria (difficulty in measuring time), dysdiadochokinesia (inability to perform rapid, alternating movements), dysmetria (impaired ability to regulate the distance, power, and speed of an act), gait disturbances (abnormal walking patterns), abnormal eye movements, and dysarthria (poor articulation). Kind of sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

Different abnormalities manifest themselves depending on which cerebellar structures are damaged. Vestibulo-cerebellar dysfunction presents with postural instability; the person tends to separate his feet on standing to gain a wider base. Spino-cerebellar dysfunction presents with a wide-based “drunken sailor” gait, characterised by uncertain start and stop motions with unequal steps. Cerebro-cerebellar dysfunction presents with disturbances in carrying out voluntary movements (e.g., intention tremors), writing difficulties (e.g., large, unequal lettering with irregular underlining), and dysarthria (slurred speech).

The brain stem is the portion of the brain that connects the spinal cord to the forebrain and cerebrum. It consists of the medulla oblongata, pons, and midbrain. But it’s more than just an organic coaxial cable; the brain stem relays specific categories of movement commands from the motor cortex. If the cortex wants the arm to wave, the brain stem transmits the message and coordinates the movement. Processes such as mastication are directed by the brain stem, and if you aren’t up on your Latin, mastication is the act of chewing. One thing all zombies do is chew.

The cerebrum is vital for perception and conscious action, but it’s the brain stem that runs the body in the absence of artificial life support. Even if everything above the midbrain is destroyed or shut down, the brain stem will sustain a living body. This is not, of course, “life” as we know it.

Collectively the brain and spinal cord are known as the central nervous system. It is reasonable to assume that for zombies to be animated some parts of this complex system need to be active. Minimally active, to be sure, but somewhere there are some organic switches in the “on” position.

Expert Witness

“We see limited and reduced brain function fairly frequently,” says Russ Hassert, MS, a wire service medical news reporter. “I contributed to a number of stories after the Brookhaven National Laboratory released a couple of studies showing that methamphetamine (“speed”) users demonstrated reduced motor and cognitive functions. The studies conclusively showed that methamphetamines taken in amount consistent with habitual abuse reduces the function of the dopamine transporters. Granted, these are not zombie stories, but they establish that there are ways that the brain’s functions can be reduced and the person still be able to function on
some
level.”

Dr. Andrea White, an infectious disease specialist formerly with Doctors Without Borders, adds, “There are studies ongoing that have established a link between patients seropositive for human immunodeficiency virus type 1 ( HIV-1) and reduced motor function. Other pathogens can similarly affect cognitive and motor functions. We know that prions produce a lethal decline of cognitive and motor function. Some unkind writers have drawn parallels between advanced Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s patients and zombies because these diseases reduce or remove cognition and communication skills while still allowing some degree of ambulation and the ingestion of food.”

Nurse practitioner Helen Poland says, “In order for a zombie to exist it must be, on some level, alive. Corpses don’t walk, and they don’t eat. But if we consider a disease, possibly a prion disease, that shuts down most of the brain and most of the organs and retains just the minimum amount necessary to accomplish a primal need—that of feeding—then you can at least construct a theory. No, it won’t hold up to the closest scrutiny, not in science as we know it today; but look at prions. Give a prion to a doctor in the 1960s and he’d be just baffled.” But, she adds, “The human body is remarkably adaptive, which is both a good thing and a potentially bad thing.”

The Zombie Factor

According to neurologist Peter Lukacs, “There are twelve cranial nerves that control certain functions, and some share functions. The optic nerve controls vision, but the abducent, trochlear, and oculomotor nerves control different aspects of eye movement. The trigeminal nerve controls mastication and the vagus nerve controls swallowing. The cranial accessory also contributes to the swallowing and talking functions. The vestibulocochlear nerve controls balance and hearing. We know zombies can walk, however awkwardly, and they can hear. You also have the olfactory nerve that controls the sense of smell, and a number of movies and books suggest that zombies can smell unspoiled living flesh. The cranial nerves (with the exception of the olfactory and optic) originate in the brainstem, which includes the midbrain, the pons, and the medulla oblongata.”

So we’re still back to headshots?

“Put a bullet through the brainstem and you switch off your zombie,” Lukacs insists. “The same holds for a sword or axe cut, or sufficient blunt force trauma. However, if you inflict minor damage to the brainstem you may remove some of the zombie’s functions—he might be unable to bite or unable to maintain balance. The bottom line here is that the real “off buttons” for a zombie are the brain stem and the motor cortex. Those, I think, would be interesting areas to explore in stories: zombies who have limited functions even for them. A zombie who can’t eat, a blind zombie…the story possibilities are endless, and they could be funny or tragic.”

J
UST THE
F
ACTS

Emergency Care

When the zombie is brought to the hospital he is not going to be an immediate threat to anyone. Having been forcibly subdued by police, he will be examined by EMTs. The handcuffs and biting mask will eliminate any risk there, but when the EMT takes the suspect’s vitals a lot of people are going to get a real shock to their system.

Almost no heartbeat. Minimal blood pressure. Reduced body temperature. Possible signs of rigor mortis. And evidence of at least one wound where the security guard shot him.

Samples of blood would be taken while the victim is still in the E.R., and as the disease began to take hold and the staff saw how fast the patient was succumbing, a rush request would be put on those tests. Specialists would be called, and at the very least, the patient would be put in limited or total quarantine. Once the outbreak had taken hold to epidemic proportions, the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) professionals would be contacted and quarantines issued, probably to the point of including all hospital staff as well as patients.

The suspect would be brought to the hospital in restraints and would be secured firmly to the motal rails of the bed. Since the suspect would continue to try to bite anyone who came near, the bite mask would be kept on, and at need a more potent “Hannibal Lecter” style mask could be obtained. Even in the world of the living there have been enough cases of dangerous biters so that protocols are already in place and would be followed to the letter.

So what would happen when the zombie was brought into the hospital?

Expert Witness

G. Harris Grantham, a retired hospital administrator from Oakland, California, was very clear on how things would be handled. “The first thing we focus on is the safety of our staff. That’s paramount. The patient’s safety comes second, always. The reason is basic common sense: if the staff is being injured or are at risk, they either can’t or won’t provide any care. They are not paid to be injured.”

According to Dr. Lukacs, “From my own experience (with violent or disruptive patients), there is usually a male nurse or male orderly (unusually strong from rolling and lifting heavy patients every day) that can be initially called to help out. The female nurses are also pretty tough (they have to be to do this job). If that is insufficient for an extremely violent patient, security will be called in (they are usually only called when a patient has a weapon or is considered a physical threat to himself or others). The worst-case scenario would be that a ‘mob’ of staff members would pile on top of the guy and subdue and restrain the guy. Plus they would try to sedate him with some tranquilizers (good luck in finding a viable vein in a pulseless zombie), which of course would have no effect. It only takes a good bear hug from behind to pin down someone’s arms to their sides, zombie or living. Just stay away from the potential biting.”