Authors: Kate Sparkes
And I wanted that kind of love to be possible.
He shrugged, apparently trying to make it hurt less by acting as though it didn’t matter. Faced now with the idea of leaving Kel, I found that my sympathy for Aren and Rowan’s situation had only grown.
“How was she yesterday?” he asked.
“Fine. Helpful. Quiet.”
He nodded and didn’t say another word, but stepped into Ulric’s tent.
Better luck to you,
I thought.
It was difficult to pick my indignant stride up after I’d dropped it, but I managed to carry it through until I reached my own tent.
Kel had cleaned my knives and was setting up our bed. Victoria and Rowan were sharing Griselda’s space, leaving us alone again. “Hope you don’t mind that I cleaned up,” he yawned, and climbed under the blankets. It was early yet, just past sunset, but we were all exhausted. “I assumed you were finished for tonight.”
“I’m done. There’s nothing more I can do here.”
Kel held the blankets up and I slipped out of my shirt and pants and into bed. The night air was cold and the ground hard, but somehow lying there with him was the most comfortable place in the world.
He pulled me closer and kissed the back of my neck. “You’re leaving, aren’t you?”
I sighed and tried to enjoy the sensual tickle of his lips on my skin, but my mind was racing too quickly for my body to keep up. “Unless some miracle happens and that potion heals Ulric, I don’t see what choice I have.” Tears squeezed out from between my closed eyelashes for the first time in as long as I could remember.
“I wanted this,” I whispered. “I was so angry when you all stopped me from going to Luid on my own after we met. I didn’t want to love you because I thought it would interfere with my plans, and now all I want is to let go of all of that and stay with you.” I sniffled, and Kel held me tighter. “I didn’t have anything to lose before.”
“You won’t try to kill Severn now, though. Will you?”
“No. I’ll be a ghost in their halls, and avoid him completely.”
Images filled my mind, ones that had once kept me going—Severn begging me for his life, Severn choking to death on poison, Severn with his head on a chopping block after a truth serum forced him to confess his crimes. All of that faded as Kel’s hands roamed over my body, as though he were memorizing every curve. I imagined never feeling this again, saw myself captured, chained and beaten, executed without trial, without ever seeing Kel’s beautiful eyes again.
Deep, piercing pain wracked my chest. I rolled over and hid my face against him as the tears fell. “I’m so scared.”
“Me, too.” His fingers tugged gently at my hair, lifting my face. He kissed my tear-stained cheeks. “If anything happens to you, I don’t know what will become of me.”
“I don’t want to leave you.”
“Just tell me you’ll be careful.”
“I promise.”
“Come back to me, and we’ll make a home together.”
I sniffled, and smiled as his lips brushed over mine. “And find a bed that’s more comfortable than this one, right?”
“Anything you desire.”
I only desired one thing, and he was right there with me. I decided that I could put other concerns aside, after all, and make some pleasant memories to take with me to Luid.
Something told me I would need them.
29
NOX
W
e traveled two more days through the forest. Though he continued to improve in magical strength and stamina, it became clearer that the potion I’d made was still not the cure Ulric needed. He went off into the woods at every chance to test it, and never returned with good news. By the second day he seemed to have reached a plateau—impressive abilities for a regular man, but attempts at magic that would do him any good against Severn left him weak and ill.
Victoria was a great help when I wanted ingredients to experiment more, but she could only work her magic on existing plants, and the ones I needed weren’t easy to come by in the forest. We had interesting conversations, though, and her calm presence kept my mind off my worries.
Rowan and Kel joined us in excursions. I wondered whether Ulric had ordered Rowan to keep an eye on me in case I tried to run off. If he wanted someone guarding me she would have been an unlikely choice, and therefore just the person I thought he might use. Still, I found I didn’t mind having her around. She asked a lot of questions, and it was nice to have someone with that sort of magic taking an interest in my work. I had a few spaces left on the pages of notes I’d started back in the rebels’ village, and she added beautiful sketches to them for me. We didn’t speak of personal things, and perhaps because of that, I found myself warming to her.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” I asked. I’d just caught her staring at the clouds after she’d done a respectable job of locating and unearthing a clump of bright pink bramblebush roots I’d asked for.
She looked at me as if waking from a dream and shook her head. “I’m fine. If my headaches taught me anything, it’s that some pain just has to be lived through. It always gets better in the end. I’ll survive.”
There was nothing to say to that. A headache I might have helped with. Fixing the feeling of being ripped from security and love was still a little beyond my reach.
“I am sorry,” I said. “But I’m glad you came back, in spite of everything.”
She made herself smile, if awkwardly. “There is something you might help me with,” she said, “but later. After Ulric’s taken care of.”
Kel was listening, and grinned at me as Rowan left us to carry my plants back to camp.
“What?” I asked, though I already knew.
“You like her.”
“I don’t know if I’d go that fa—”
“You’re
friends
with her.”
I slapped his arm. “Don’t push it.”
His smile faded as we reached camp in time to see Ulric pull Rowan aside. She didn’t make eye contact as he spoke. At least he wasn’t yelling now.
Aren approached us, but said nothing.
“What’s going on there?” I asked.
“I don’t know anymore. He doesn’t say anything to me about her. Only speaks to her when I’m not around, and otherwise...”
He didn’t have to finish. The ‘otherwise’ was that he constantly had work to do, and no chance to speak to Rowan even if he wanted to. Aren rode with Ulric during the day, and they planned. The Sorcerers from Belleisle rode with them, and presumably knew what was going on. Victoria, Kel and I rode behind, and Rowan brought up the rear, riding Florizel.
Ulric sent Aren ahead to scout every evening when we stopped, and Aren slept in eagle form outside of Ulric’s tent. Any free time Aren had he spent alone, working on his magic, or with me, working on my blocking skills. I was making progress, if slowly. Much as I hated taking Aren away from his time developing skills he could use against Severn, I increasingly felt that my own practice might become just as important.
I forced my thoughts back to the present. Thinking of future possibilities was still too much.
Nothing is decided yet,
I reminded myself.
“Ulric has you on a short leash,” Kel observed to Aren. “We miss you.”
“I’d rather not talk about it.” My brother had changed since his return from Darmid. He didn’t laugh now, and hardly smiled save for a cold little thing that didn’t reach his eyes. The worst of it was that Ulric finally seemed pleased with his youngest son. I’d seen him nodding when Aren spoke, clapping him on the arm when Aren brought back reports after his flights. Aren had told me how he’d once craved our father’s attention. He certainly didn’t seem to be enjoying it now that he had it.
We watched as Rowan and Griselda headed for the woods. Kel excused himself and followed.
“Having any further success with your potion?” Aren asked, and seated himself on a boulder.
I sat next to him. “I wish for everyone’s sakes that I could say yes.”
“It’s not your fault. You’ve done more than anyone expected.” He rested his head in his hands, hiding his face. “So that’s it for Ulric. And for me.”
I reached out and gave his shoulder an awkward pat. “Everything is going to be fine,” I told him. “We’re going to make it, you’ll see.”
His shoulders shook, and I thought he was crying. Moments later, I realized he was laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
He wiped his eyes. “It’s not funny at all. None of it. It was just you trying so hard to sound optimistic. Nox, Tyrea’s dark princess, never one to look on the bright side of anything in the time I’ve known you. And yet we’ve apparently found a situation so dire that even you can muster a pitiful cheer for the troops.”
I smacked his arm. “Yeah, that’s hilarious. Listen to you, Aren, Tyrea’s daft prince—”
He hit me back, and a high-pitched yelp of a laugh escaped me. We’d missed so many years of this. I supposed we were too old for it now, but it felt good to be teasing my brother. Tensions were too high, and we all needed a release. If I didn’t laugh, I’d cry again, and I couldn’t have that.
A sharp look from Ulric shut us up, but I still felt better for having laughed.
We reached a small town called Wildwood the next afternoon. An old man with gray hair rode out to meet us. He and Ulric clasped hands, and he greeted Aren warmly. I couldn’t hear their voices from my position at the rear of the group, but watched Ulric making introductions between the man and the Sorcerers. The mayor, perhaps, or someone who had worked for Ulric in Luid and had escaped the city.
I didn’t expect them to make their way to the rear of the group, but after they’d finished speaking to Griselda, Ulric motioned for the man to follow as he rode closer to us.
“This is Nox,” he said. I offered my hand and a polite nod. “My daughter. She’s one of the most talented Potioners in Tyrea. Nox, this is my brother Xaven.”
My uncle beamed at me. “Such a pleasure, my dear. I’m sure you and my daughter Morea will have much to discuss. She’s a Potioner, as well.”
I nodded again, feeling a bit like a pigeon with all the head-bobbing, but unsure what else to do. I hadn’t expected to have more family thrown at me until Luid, and hadn’t expected such warmth from anyone.
Xaven looked at his brother. “Ulric, I’ve never heard you speak with such fatherly pride.”
I snorted, and tried to pretend it had been a sneeze.
Ulric nearly succeeded at holding back a smile. “I’ll admit, I’m proud to have such a gift in the family, but Nox takes all of the credit for the development of her skill.”
I looked to Aren, who rode beside Xaven. His eyebrows crept toward his hairline in surprise, but he seemed pleased to hear our father recognizing my talent. He mouthed something to me behind Ulric’s back that looked like
Remember this day.
“This is Kel,” Ulric continued, “Rowan, and Victoria. And Florizel.”
Xaven’s eyes widened slightly at Rowan’s name. “We meet at last,” he said, and offered no further explanation. He turned back to Ulric. “If you’re ready to move closer to the city, we are as well. Some of the people from here in Wildwood have offered to join us.”
“Have they?” Ulric asked.
Xaven nodded. “You have supporters, Ulric. People don’t forget so easily.”
“Some do,” Ulric muttered. “Yes, I think we should get as close to the city as is feasible without risking attack.”
“There’s going to be a risk no matter where we are,” Aren said.
“Out of range for them to fall on us without warning in the night, then,” Ulric said.
“We’ve just the place.” Xaven turned his horse around, waved and nodded to a young man standing outside of a shop, and continued down the road. “I’ll bring my best people now, and the others will come later with supplies.”
“If they can bring seeds or fresh cuttings of plants, that would be helpful,” Victoria offered.
Xaven squared his shoulders. “I’ll see that they do, though I hope we’re not planning to be camped there for long enough to grow crops.”
“We’ll see.” Ulric’s voice became grim. “They’re well stocked in there, and have the advantage as long as they don’t run out of food.”
“Little farmland to speak of inside the walls,” Xaven said. “Though I’d say they’ll work around that.”
Aren cleared his throat. “Severn has been collecting magical talent, remember. If there’s anyone who can conjure food from outside, he’s in there right now. And they do have the port for deliveries, unless you have a navy up your sleeve.”
Such dire conversation made for an unpleasant ride, but soon enough we reached a place where the road and the land sloped sharply downward, leveled into a long, flat area, then dropped again. There at the top, we had a fine view of everything below. The ocean sparkled to the south, stretching from a sheltered harbor and spreading to cover the world to the horizon in a dark, rippling blanket.
Kel will be pleased,
I thought, and turned back to the land. In the distance, beyond a cleared plain cut through by a dry riverbed, a dark shape stood silhouetted against the early evening sky.
Luid.
I’d dreamed of the city many times after my mother revealed who we really were. In my imagination it shifted between being a city of delights and a place of dark horrors and evil kings. Seeing it now from a distance, I supposed it was probably both, and neither. Still, I’d never visited the city before, and its presence made me shiver for reasons I didn’t understand.
The others moved far off into the woods to make camp, but I stayed and watched as lights appeared in the city. Night covered the land surrounding them, leaving them adrift as the land became indistinguishable from the sea. Kel rode up beside me and motioned for me to follow him away from the road.
“This is as close as the group is going to get, isn’t it?” I asked. “At least until the battle starts. They won’t dare camp closer.”
“That’s the plan.”
“It’s not so far. I could make it overnight. Right?”
He didn’t say anything as we made our way into the camp, which was well-hidden far from the road. Thirty or more people were there already, setting up tiny sleeping tents, erecting the larger structures we had been using, setting up a place for the cookfire, and unloading piles of battle gear: leather armor, weapons that ranged from excellent to only slightly better than what Laelana’s crew had used for sparring, light saddles, and smaller necessities. I dismounted and led my horse until we found our tent, where Victoria was directing the unloading of our supplies.