99 Reasons to Hate Cats: Cartoons for Cat Lovers (5 page)

Reason 54:
Santa gives them catnip not coal.

Reason 55:
Thinks dead animals make good gifts

Reason 56:
Throws up in just the wrong spot

Reason 57:
There’s no such thing as a “Crazy Dog Lady.”

Reason 58:
Leeches your body heat in winter

Reason 59:
Women think this behavior shows “love.”

Reason 60:
Marking territory

Reason 61:
Can’t be claimed as a dependent on taxes

Reason 62:
Insane kitty room-to-room racing

Reason 63:
They never write “thank you” notes.

Reason 64:
Cat hair on your pillow

Reason 65:
Cat hair on your couch

Reason 66:
Cat hair on your best clothes

Reason 67:
Chronic glass tipping