Authors: Sarah Dosher
We laid calmly for a long time. She barely moved beyond lifting my hand off her chest and running her fingers up and down my palm. She traced every line, every curve of my hand before wrapping her hand back around it and squeezing it tight. I alternated between rubbing my thumb across the back of her hand, to running my fingers up and down her arm. Before long, her tears had completely stopped and her breathing returned to normal. We just laid together and existed in silence. I couldn’t help but wonder if she even knew it was me. What if she turned around and expected to see Shaw laying here. I couldn’t blame her if she did, but I also knew it would rip my heart out at the same time.
***
Eli Blue
I knew Deacon had followed me the minute his scent hit me. I’d know it anywhere: a mix of metallic guitar strings and the delicious smelling cologne he wore. I wanted to spray my bed with it so it would envelop me every night while I slept, although if I did, I may never leave my bed. Hmm, maybe I could just tie Deacon to it.
Shit! I shook my head and tried to focus. But he kept rubbing his hands all over me. I’d pulled his hand away once, but then noticed the large calluses caused by his guitar, and even though I’d meant to push him away, I ended up running the pads of my fingers over those rough spots instead. Which I’m sure had the opposite effect as I was going for. What was I going for? Hell if I knew. But this shit had to stop, he couldn’t just show up anytime he wanted and get a free pass to me. I didn’t work like that, never have and never will.
I turned over and my eyes connected with his, almost immediately snubbing out my anger. They seemed darker than they had before, deeper and full of secrets. His gaze drifted from mine until he was staring over my head, burning a hole into the Cinderella mural painted on the wall. He had a black beanie on his head and long strands of hair were poking out, and it made him look even more menacing. I almost laughed when, exactly on cue with my thoughts, a scowl appeared on his face. It took effort, but I was able to suppress the laugh, but I did feel the corners of my mouth turn up slightly. He must have seen it because his eyes finally flickered back to me and his scowl deepened into a “What the fuck are you smiling at?” look, which easily made the fire of anger reignite within me; this had to end now, I had no use for his games in my life. The back and forth was already driving me mad.
“What are you doing in here, Deacon?” I snapped as heat radiated from my core, up my chest, and spread across my face.
“You looked like you needed a friend.” He replied after taking a long moment to settle on an answer.
“And you thought, what? That you were the perfect man for the job?”
“Well, I didn’t see anyone else chasing after you, if that’s what you mean.”
He pushed up into a sitting position and I followed.
“Normally when a girl runs from a room full of people it means she wants to be left alone.”
“Are you fucking kidding me with this shit?” He snapped, so sharply it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
I knew I was being a bitch, but I didn’t care. My emotions were building rapidly and he drew them out so harshly that I felt raw.
I stood up and paced to the other end of the room and back.
“What do you want from me, Deacon?”
He didn’t answer; he just stared at me as I continued to pace.
“I asked you a perfectly simple question, why can’t you answer me?” I paused, thinking he’d jump in, but he didn’t. “What. Do. You. Want?”
Then he was on me, like a predator that had just picked up the scent of its prey. He moved forward and I moved back, faster and faster until I ran into the wall and had nowhere else to go. His body crashed into mine with the full force of his weight. Every inch of his body was touching mine. His chest was flat against mine, our legs were intertwined, even his hips pushed forward digging into my middle.
I couldn’t speak, I could barely breathe.
“I thought I made it perfectly clear what I wanted from you.”
He tilted his hips further and dug his erection further between my legs, causing me to gasp.
I moved my hands to his chest ready to push him away, but he grabbed my wrists and held my arms over my head, flat against the wall. His face moved to my neck, and he used his head to force mine to tilt in the opposite direction. I felt wet heat burning from the base of my neck up to my ear and then the warmth of his breath singed my ear as he spoke.
“You know what I want, Eli, don’t play dumb. You know because you want the same thing from me.”
All I could do was shake my head, but even I knew it was a lie. I did want him; I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life.
“Don’t lie to yourself princess, your entire body would ache without me.”
He pulled away from me. The only part of his body still touching mine was his hands gripping my wrists. I heard a traitorous whimper slip from my mouth at the emptiness I now felt. He smiled a devious smile, one that would cause good church-going ladies to wake from their dreams in a cold sweat.
“Ask nicely.”
“No?” I cried, but it sounded more like a question than a declaration.
“Ask nicely, and you can have my mouth back, or this…” he wiggled his hands on my wrists, “will be the last part of me that ever touches you.”
I took a deep breath and swallowed the thickness that had gathered in my throat.
“Please.” I said, but it didn’t sound like my voice; it sounded weak and distant.
“Please what, Eli?” He teased, and I could feel the fire coursing through my veins.
I pushed my lips together in a hard line and narrowed my eyes at him. He moved his head closer and skimmed his lips along my flesh. I could feel the heat of his breath with little nips of his teeth as he moved along my neck then down to my chest. He was going to wear me down, I could already feel the heat pooling in my core and my chest was heaving with heavy breaths.
I’d never experienced anything like him, hell I’d never even heard of anything like this. I craved him, but was also disgusted with him at the same time. He was trying to prove he had some power over me—and he did. No matter how hard I wanted to fight it, no matter how much it didn’t make sense, he did.
“C’mon princess, just say it and I’ll give you what you want.”
“Please, Deacon.” I breathed.
“That’s hard for you isn’t it? You don’t want to believe I have control over your body.”
He shifted my hands over my head so he could hold them in place with just one of his. I closed my eyes and felt his fingers glide down my body and cup my breast. He rubbed small circles around my nipple with his thumb causing my hips to push forward, searching for him.
“Say it.” He demanded.
“Please, Deacon, please touch me.”
“Oh God, I love the sound of my name coming from your lips.” He said against my mouth then he released me.
He pulled me by the hand back to where we had been earlier. Laying me down, he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me tight against his body, consuming me with his scent again. I reached up and ran my hand against his rough cheek craving more of a connection. Although his eyes were closed, his head was tilted down toward mine giving me easy access to his mouth. The tip of my tongue lightly caressed the defined outline of his bottom lip, and I felt his grip on my hips tighten. A strangled growl came from his throat just as he plunged his tongue into my mouth. His hand fisted in my hair and he rolled on top of me, pressing me further into the bed with the entire weight of his body. My legs opened willingly and wrapped around him, digging my heels into his ass, needing him closer—inside me.
His tongue continued to plunder my mouth, as I fought to meet every long, wet stroke. I ran my hands up the back of his shirt and over his warm, hard body. My fingernails ached to dig into his flesh, and scratch over every inch of his body. He slowly rocked his hips, pushing into my core exactly where I needed; faster and faster, until I was pulling at the top of his jeans, wanting nothing between us. I almost had the treacherous denim pushed down when his body suddenly left mine. He placed his hands on either side of my head and pushed up and away from me. Looking down at me through hooded eyes he shook his head. My feet were still on his ass, so I pulled hard, trying to drive him back down, but he didn’t budge.
“What…wh…” I stammered as I fought to breathe.
His eyes burned into me with a mix of passion and stubbornness, “Damnit, Eli, what have you done to me? I came up here to take care of you, not to take advantage of you.”
I smiled. “I promise you’re not taking advantage of me, I’m more than willing.”
He growled and looked up toward the ceiling. “Don’t say shit like that to me, especially right now. You’re drunk, and I’d give anything to get inside you right now. I won’t fuck up the possibility of a next time because your judgment is not so clear this time. You feel me?”
I giggled and ran my hands under the front of his shirt and across his rippled stomach. “Oh I feel you, and I promise my decision won’t change tomorrow, or the day after.”
“The more you try to convince me to strip my clothes off for you, the more I’m going to believe you really are drunk. So how about I move over here and we get some sleep? Then we’ll see how you feel in the morning.” He planted a single, chaste kiss on my forehead before he moved beside me.
I folded my arms over my chest and huffed out a breath loudly. Yes, I was freaking pouting. Obviously, acting like a toddler wasn’t the most attractive thing I could have done when trying to get a man to strip his clothes off and take advantage of me, but I was just turned down, and no matter what state of mind you’re in, that’s never fun.
Deacon elbowed me in my side. I ignored him. He elbowed me again. I whipped my head toward him and gave him my best glare.
“What?” I said softly through gritted teeth.
“You look fucking gorgeous tonight, princess.” He said as he turned on his side to face me and cupped his hand on my cheek. “And if, for some crazy ass reason, you decide you still want anything to do with me tomorrow, I promise not to stop loving every inch of your body until you scream so loud, the neighbors know my name.”
He lightly licked his tongue across my lips before he flipped me over, smashed my ass into his body, and said gruffly, “Sleep, princess.”
So I did.
Chapter Seventeen
Deacon
I left Eli asleep, surrounded by her princesses, and wandered the long hall searching for a glimpse into her world. I hadn’t slept a wink, and didn’t think it was possible for me to sleep with her so near and untouched. At the end of the hall were huge French doors that opened into the biggest room I’d ever seen.
Stepping into this room felt like entering a whole new house. The walls were a pale blue that was a distinct change from the stark white that ran throughout the rest of the house. The windows were covered with huge curtains pooling onto the floor. The wall directly across from the door held a large framed picture of Eli and her dad. Eli couldn’t have been more than three years old. Her dad was holding her high in the air and they were both smiling.
Under the large picture were dark brown shelves filled with more books than I could count. There were old ones, new ones, children’s stories, adult, every type of book I knew. They all seemed to have one thing in common: fairytales. On the top shelf, standing tall, was an old, worn copy of Cinderella. The spine was taped together in places, frayed from years of use.
At the other end of the room was a large four-poster bed with blankets that matched the walls, and more pillows than I could count. Pictures were everywhere making this room personal, more of a home, while the rest of the house was cold and sterile. Luci was curled up in the middle of the bed and ran to me as I got close, rubbing her silky head against my hand.
Next to the bed was a black piano. The top of the piano was covered with sheet music and other papers with words scribbled on them. I picked one up and saw the words “Forever Lost” scrolled across the top in a delicate print. I didn’t read another word of Eli’s intimate thoughts, and placed the paper back, exactly where I’d found it. I knew the level of one’s soul put into anything written, and I would never invade that without permission.
The piano bench was covered with a soft blanket I assumed was for the hours on end she probably sat here, letting her fingers speak the emotions of her heart. I pulled the bench out and sat down, running my finger down the smooth keys. The piano was not an instrument I was talented in, but I could play. Depressing the keys of her piano and hearing the sound ring through her room planted the seeds of a song longing to be told.
I lost track of time as my fingers unskillfully played the rhythm ringing through my head. I’d been writing music for years now, and had come a long way since the first song I’d created. Now, I knew the song always started as a shell, and grew best on its own, with only a small amount of coaxing from me. If I sat back and gave it time, the song would develop into what it was meant to be without me getting in its way.
The sun was just starting to peek from behind the horizon and gleam off the top of the piano when I heard soft footsteps behind me. I turned to see a sleepy Eli wearing only a short white shirt and panties.
“You found my baby.” She said as her smile grew.
“I did.” I answered.
She walked to the piano and ran her delicate fingers across the edge of the bone colored keys. I watched as her small hand slowly moved to rest on mine, perfectly aligned. She pressed her fingers down, causing mine to depress the keys, and a more robust and clean sound rang through the room than I had been able to create on my own. She lifted my arm and slid under it to sit between the piano and me; her back to my front. Once her ass wiggled into place on the piano bench, our hands resumed their haunting melody. Every muscle in my body relaxed as we flowed together, created together.