A Change of Heart (36 page)

“Yes to all of that. Yes. I’m yours.” Her eyes filled again, and tears spilled down her cheeks. “I’ve never been more sure of anything my entire life. I’ve wasted so much time being afraid and pushing you away. I don’t want to waste another minute.”

“OK.” He wiped her tears away with the pads of his thumbs.
“How about we just take things slow, sleep in each other’s arms tonight, and—”

“I want you, Ted. I’ve always wanted you.” She scowled. “Are you going to stand there and argue with me about this? Seriously?”

He laughed, put his arm around her shoulders and guided her out of the shed to the stairs leading up to his apartment. “That’s my girl.”

“And don’t you forget it.” She twined her fingers in his. “I don’t suppose you have protection?”

“I do.”

“That’s good.”

He caught the slight hitch in her breath, and his heart filled with tenderness and the powerful need to protect her. His little soldier’s nerves weren’t as steady as she wanted him to believe. He wasn’t going to push, but he also sensed backing away would be a huge mistake. That might do more harm than good. He needed to navigate his way through this like a cat burglar. Each step he took had to be placed with infinite care. “You’re in charge, Cory. Whatever you need, whatever you want, I’m yours.” He opened the door and followed her inside.

“Wow. This is nice.” She walked around his great room, checking everything out. Her hand trembled slightly as she picked up a picture of his entire family, grandkids and all. “Wow. You really do have a large family.”

“Cory.”

“Hmm?” She put the picture back on the mantel and whirled around.

“Relax. I’m not going to pounce on you.” He grabbed the remote control from the end table and turned on the TV. “Let’s
see if we can find a movie to watch. How about some popcorn and a beer?”

“That would be great. I didn’t eat anything at the housewarming.” She continued to move around the room, studying everything. “Your apartment is so roomy.” She glanced at the vaulted ceiling. “You and Noah built this place?”

“A couple summers ago, yeah.” He put the popcorn in the microwave and hit start.

“You keep it really neat for a guy.”

He chuckled. “I cleaned before I left, and I’ve been gone for a week. It’s not usually this neat. Sorry to pop that bubble.”

“Oh, I didn’t really have a bubble. I mean…Gah! I guess I am a little nervous.” She accepted the beer he handed her.

“It’s just me, Cory.”

“There’s nothing ‘just me’ about you, Ted. There never has been as far as I’m concerned.”

“See? Perceptive as hell.” He leaned in and brushed his lips against hers. “Have a seat and look for something we can watch. I’ll be back with popcorn in a minute.”

“Sounds good.”

Taking a pull from his beer, he waited for the microwave timer to go off. Cory was here, in his home, and she loved him.
She loves me!
A stupid grin broke free while he poured the popcorn into a large plastic bowl. “What are we watching?”

“How do you feel about old Westerns?”

“Love ’em.”

“That would explain why your TV is already on the Encore Western channel.” She grinned.

His pulse took off, and heat spiraled through him. “Here. Help yourself.” He handed her the popcorn as he took his place beside her.

“Thanks.” She took the bowl from him and placed it in her lap while kicking her shoes off. Tucking her legs up on the couch, she snuggled up against him, laying her head on his shoulder with a happy sigh.

At least he hoped it was happiness. Content to his very center, he put an arm around her and brushed the top of her head with his chin, savoring the way her silky hair felt against his skin. He could do this. He could make it through tonight without making moves on her. All he had to do was ignore her soft warmth tucked up against him, ignore the amazing way she smelled, the silky feel of her hair, the way her eyes had looked so deep into his when she told him she loved him. All he had to do was block out all her sexiness. Too bad he found every little thing about her sexy as hell.

He stifled the groan rising in his throat and shifted to relieve the tightness of his jeans over his raging erection. Taking another pull on his beer, he forced his attention front and center to the movie he’d seen a hundred times. She nuzzled his neck, and he almost leapt off the couch. The groan he’d tried to stifle made its escape.

“I love the way you smell, Ted, and it’s all you. Not the soap you use, or aftershave. Just you.” She took his earlobe between her teeth and gave it a tug. “Amazing man. My amazing man,” she whispered into his ear, running her tongue around the outside.

“Ohh, honey. You’re killing me.”

“Yeah?” She giggled. “You know what I’ve wanted to do since the first day we met?” Setting the bowl on the coffee table, she glanced at him over her shoulder.

“What’s that?” he rasped out, and cleared his throat.

She shifted around and climbed onto his lap to straddle him. “I’ve always wanted to run my hands over your naked chest, shoulders and those tasty biceps of yours.”

“Naked?” He swallowed. He was losing the battle, and his brain fogged with lust. “Are you sure about this, Cory, because I don’t want to—”

“I’m sure. Let me be in control. I just need to be in control.” She ran her fingers through his hair and planted her lips on his.

True to her word, she kept her eyes open. Who knew that would be so erotic? “You’ve got it.” Ted surrendered, body and soul. For Cory, he would give himself over completely. No matter how he looked at it, this was a win-win proposition. “I love you, Corinna Lynn Marcel.” He ran his hands up the back of her blouse. “Please be gentle with me.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

“B
E GENTLE WITH YOU?
” C
ORY
giggled against Ted’s lips, and a multitude of emotions swirled and chased through her: elation, arousal, anxiety, love—and relief. She’d been given another chance. He hadn’t written her off.
Trust him. He’s your once in a lifetime love, like Mom had with Dad.
“Your sense of humor is another thing I love about you.” She nibbled on his lower lip, loving the way her touch caused his hips to lift beneath her.

“I wasn’t trying to be funny,” he whispered, nibbling back.

A shiver sluiced through her, and it had nothing to do with revulsion. The bulge pressed against the apex of her thighs should’ve freaked her out, sent her running to her truck and racing down the drive. It didn’t. Answering heat and dampness flooded her center, and she rocked against him. “Off,” she mumbled, tugging at his T-shirt. He leaned forward, pulling the cotton hem out of his pants to help her. She lifted it over his head and dropped it to the couch.

She couldn’t get enough of the sight of his bare chest, and skimmed her palms over his warmth and velvety smoothness. A patch of dark golden hair grew between his nipples, creating a path leading down to his jeans and disappearing below the
waistband. Continuing to indulge herself, she stroked his lean, muscled torso, focusing on the strained, sexed-up expression on his beloved face. He watched her every move, his gaze heated and tender. Another part of her knitted back together.
Let go. Trust this man who holds your heart.
The voice of certainty whispered through her soul.

Ted ran his hands under her blouse, up and down her back, finally coming around to cup her breasts. She gasped, arching into his touch. “Wait.” She leaned back and unbuttoned the top two buttons of her blouse. She pulled it over her head and tossed it to the floor. Reaching around for the back clasps of her bra, she started to unhook it.

“Will you let me do that?” Ted ran his hands over her shoulders.

Heat flooded her cheeks and her heart fluttered away inside her chest. She nodded. Slowly he reached around her, unhooked her bra and drew it off, letting it drop to the couch. The sharp intake of his breath went straight through her.

“I am one lucky man,” he whispered. “You are so beautiful.” His hands came up to cup her breasts, running his thumbs over her nipples until they pebbled and ached for more. “Way too beautiful for a farm boy like me.”

His hands slid down her waist and back up to her breasts again, setting off wave after wave of need. He leaned forward and took a nipple into his mouth, laving it with his tongue. Frissons of sensation rippled through her. Tangling her fingers in his curls, she drew him closer. “I haven’t seen the bedroom yet.”

Switching to her other breast, he ran his palm over the one he’d left. Still damp from his ministrations, the friction almost sent her into an orgasm. “I’m a lucky, lucky woman,” she groaned.
“Bedroom?” The rumble of his laughter brought an answering smile to her face. “Please?”

“Wrap those gorgeous legs around my waist when I lift you, and put your arms around my neck.” Ted slid his hands under her bottom and brought them both up off the couch. They moved down the hall and through the door on the left. His large bedroom had bare white walls. A plain, generic bedspread covered the king-size mattress, which rested on a box spring set in one of those metal frames with wheels. A cheap, particleboard dresser with a thin veneer of real wood sat against the wall, with a flat-screen TV on top.

“This doesn’t reflect your personality at all.” Puzzled, she studied her surroundings as he set her on her feet.

“I know. I’ve been waiting for you.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “We’ll decorate it together, including an L&L bedroom suite of furniture made by yours truly just for the two of us.” Running his hands over her shoulder, he whispered, “The mattress is top-of-the-line, though. Want to check it out?”

“I do.” She shivered at his touch. “Condom?”

“I’ll be right back.” He hurried out of the room to the bathroom next door.

She sighed and pondered the twisted road that had led her to this moment. Her experience with men was limited, and not all of it good. Nervousness had her clasping her hands together. She continued to stand where he’d left her, unsure what she should do. Lie down on the large bed? Take off her remaining clothing?

“Cory, are you all right?”

She shrugged, sending him a tremulous smile. “A little nervous.”

“Me too.”

“You?” Everything about him screamed confident and self-assured and always had. She’d always found that extremely reassuring about him. He made her feel safe. She flashed him a puzzled look. “What are you nervous about?”

“This counts.” He placed a couple of foil packets on the bedside table. “Sure, I’ve had sex, but never with someone I saw myself with for the rest of my life. I love you, Cory. This is it. You’re my one and only.” He gaze sought hers, and he raked a hand through his hair. “I’m so nervous my hands are shaking. What if you get scared, and we can’t break through the association your subconscious makes between me and bastard who hurt you?”

“I won’t let that happen.” Her ears were still ringing with his declaration. He saw himself with her for the rest of his life? Her heart dissolved into a puddle of warmth, and her hands unclasped.

“What if I don’t live up to your expectations?” His face screwed up for a second. “In the sack, I mean.”

He really did look nervous and uncertain, and an achy tenderness welled up inside her. “That’s not possible. You’ve already far exceeded my expectations.” She took a step closer. “Can I tell you something?”

“Of course. You know you can tell me anything.” He reached for her hand, and she took hold.

“I have a therapist now. During my sessions with her, I’m going to spill all the ugliness I’ve experienced in the past couple years. I’m not bringing that to you anymore, and I agree. Tonight counts.” She stepped into his arms. “From here on in, we’re making new memories together. I want us to join the monthly poker games, have Sunday dinners with your family, go on dates, share secrets and build a life together. You’re not going to be the sounding board for all my crazy anymore. You’re my best friend, my lover—my life partner.”

“Why Corinna Marcel, are you asking me to marry you?”

She laughed and tangled her fingers in his wonderful curls. “I’m telling you I want to move forward. With you. If there’s going to be any marrying going on, I want to hear a proposal. Now, let’s get busy.” She smiled at the way his eyes widened, then darkened as she backed him into the bed. “I know you, Ted. You’re going to ask me if I want to be on top, so I don’t feel hemmed in. I don’t.” Running her hands over his chest, she peppered his jaw with kisses. “I’ve given this a lot of thought, and—”

“A
lot
of thought?”

“Sure,” she said, lifting her eyes. His crooked grin and heated perusal sent thrill waves cascading through her. “At least since I got in my truck to head over here.”

“Ahh, I see.” He fell back onto the mattress, taking her with him. “Kiss me, Cory. We’re done talking.”

She did just that, melting into him, reveling in the feel of his bare chest against hers. Heat built between them, and she forgot to keep her eyes open, only wanting to give herself over to the feel of him. He ran his hands down inside the back of her jeans and cupped her bottom, pulling her closer. She rolled off.

“Did I scare you?” His hoarse voice was filled with concern.