Read A Consumer's Guide to Male Hustlers Online
Authors: Joseph Itiel
A sex act that is easy enough for most healthy males to perform presents a possible complication for a hustler: climaxing for the benefit of the client. Here, again, what appears simple is, in practice, a complicated subject.
If it is essential to you that the hustler climax during the session, he should be informed and consent to it before you bring him home or go to his place. If this is optional, then the subject does not need to be brought up. But why on earth would the hustler
not
want to climax?
On the simplest level, a hustler may not want to climax because it will make it more difficult for him to turn another trick. His level of arousal may decline and he may not be able to maintain an erection. This varies from hustler to hustler. I have brought street hustlers home who ejaculated abundantly, of their own initiative, long before I did. When I brought them back to the street they stood at their former spot ready for the next client. Obviously, they could climax a few times in one evening. Others, of the same age group, apologized for not climaxing because they found it difficult to hustle after doing it.
Some hustlers find it difficult to climax because they are not aroused physically by the client and have problems getting an erection. Larry, a model I have seen off and on for some six years, rarely even gets a full erection. He is, however, one of the most affectionate kissers I have met. Though physically not very aroused, he has a good attitude: he wants to please the client and, without doubt, enjoys being affectionate. I have had enough experience to know that his affection is not faked. He climaxed with me only once as a symbolic act of gratitude for a favor I had done him.
Which brings me to the symbolism involved in ejaculation. Hustler Alfonso, about whom I wrote in Chapter 4, never climaxed with any client. Since most of his clients wanted to be screwed, he faked orgasms over and over again. (It helped that he was a drama major!) He took great pride in the fact that he
never
let his clients partake of his "essence." He told me that he would masturbate every morning to make sure that he would not accidentally climax with a client. On some symbolic level, in his own eyes, he was the winner. The clients paid him, but he did not
fully
repay them.
Then Alfonso went to Los Angeles for his junior year in college. He called me from there and asked me whether, during the winter break, he could stay with me. Before I could give him an answer, he said, "I'll pay you for your hospitality in my own way."
I was intrigued. Alfonso was not without friends. Why would he choose to stay with a client on his holidays?
It turned out that he wanted to do out calls with his former clients. For this he needed access to a phone (this took place before beepers) and to be able to speak openly. His friends did not know about his hustling.
He paid me by having sex with me four times in one week. On the first occasion he came in my mouth (that was before AIDS). "Was that an
accident
?" I asked him worriedly.
"No, that was my present for you for being a nice guy."
Of course, hustlers will, at times, do more than had been agreed upon originally, either because they feel like it in the heat of passion, or as a treat for a deserving client. But the move should come from the hustler, not the client. The agreement may be renegotiated by either party, for future sessions. It is a psychological error to put the hustler on the spot by asking him, "If I gave you another $30 would you. . . ?" He may acquiesce because he needs the money but will resent it later.
Should the client negotiate the length of the session in advance? I do not, though most clients do. Let's examine the issue from both sides.
The hustler/model sells lust for a given period of time. For additional periods of time he charges an additional fee. As far as he is concerned, the meter starts running when he reaches the client's home. If an hour has been agreed upon, then the drink he is offered and the chit-chat are part of the sixty-minute session.
From the client's point of view, the hour starts when there is an exchange of lust. If the client shows the hustler a porno video, that is done for the latter's titillation and should not start the meter.
It gets even more complicated. If the hustler stays the night—with an appropriate higher fee—how much sleeping time should he be given? Does the fee mean that the client is entitled to demand that his companion be awake the entire night for sexual exchanges and talk? The client may feel that at, say, $200, the hustler's time is all his. The latter may have to go to school or work the next morning and may feel that good sex before falling asleep and just "skin contact" for the entire night are worth the $200.
By convention (really, the
only
convention), when the client climaxes the session is over. Suppose you stipulated with the hustler that he would spend an hour with you. Somehow, you did not pace yourself properly and climaxed after ten minutes. Is the hustler supposed to stay another fifty minutes? If he wants to take a shower before he leaves, is this part of the fifty minutes?
To avoid all of this, I leave the subject open and try to concentrate on quality time, being mindful that I hired the hustler for a reasonable period of time. If the length of the session has not been stipulated beforehand, the hustler is not as tempted to check his watch constantly and see how much time is left.
Once a hustler becomes a regular, a routine is established. I have no problem with a hustler I see often who says to me, "Tuesday afternoon it will have to be a quickie, because I have a class at 6 p.m." I know that next time we will spend a lot of time together.
I think it is unprofessional on the part of the hustler, on the phone, to ask the client personal questions unrelated to the sex act, such as, "How much do you weigh? How old are you?" But, when this happens, full disclosure on the part of the client is essential. For instance, if a masseur does not want to exert himself working on an obese man—a very unprofessional attitude—then it makes no sense, for the client's sake, to give erroneous information about his weight.
Speaking of masseurs, if you want to be "released" it is
essential
that you ask on the phone whether the masseur offers a "full-body" or a "release massage." If you want to do more than be massaged (e.g., blow the masseur a bit) you must agree on it in your telephone conversation. If the masseur's answer is vague, such as, "You'll get a good massage and we'll see how it plays out," you may, rarely, get much more than just release, or, more likely, no release at all.
* * *
In my many years as a patron of hustlers, I have never been able to afford the asking price of San Francisco hustlers, because I saw them regularly rather than occasionally. Even when I used to go to the baths routinely, I saw hustlers on a regular basis, unless I was dating at the time. (I never had the psychological stamina to go to the baths twice in a row!) I have always had to negotiate fees that would fit into my limited budget.
In Chapter 1 I related how I first got the idea of setting up a hustler budget. This budget grows or shrinks depending on my financial circumstances, and has to be adjusted for inflation. (In the winter of 1965, I paid my first San Francisco regular $7 per session. In 1997, I paid my regulars $50.
4
)
4
. This reflects accurately the cost of living. In 1965 I paid $100 per month for my furnished studio apartment. The same type of unit would rent now for about $700 per month.
I have traveled a lot in third world countries. Hustlers there charged so little (when converted to U.S. dollars) that I could actually pay them more than they asked for.
5
To my surprise, in such countries I often found a single traveling companion, and took care of all his financial needs while we were together, plus a monetary gift when we parted.
6
Maybe there was not enough challenge in playing the rich tourist, picking up hustlers wherever and whenever I desired.
5
. In many countries (e.g., Mexico, the Philippines) it would not occur to a hustler to quote a price for his services. The typical Filipino answer to the question, "How much will I owe you when we are done?" would be
bahalana
—it's up to you. In such situations, I suggested, very diplomatically, that we agree on a mutually satisfactory price before having sex. It is not a good scene when, after having sex, the hustler feels that the client is not as generous as he expected.
All of this is changing because of the "global village." In international tourist meccas, such as Acapulco, hustlers nowadays (compared to a few decades ago) are very much at ease quoting their rates.
6
. See
Philippine Diary: A Gay Guide to the Philippines
, Joseph Itiel (San Francisco: International Wavelength, 1989), Chapter IV, "Arman: Traveling with a Filipino Companion," pp. 48-54.
Back to San Francisco. Hustlers are not MDs or lawyers whose charges must not be challenged because of their august professional standing. I do not wish to discuss here the pricing policies of physicians and attorneys except for one observation: members of these professions study very hard and for many years before they are allowed to establish a practice. All hustlers need to do to become sex workers is to hang out on an appropriate street corner, or insert an ad in a gay paper! A prospective client need not feel any qualms about making a counteroffer to a hustler's asking price.
Negotiating an appropriate compensation for a street hustler is somewhat different than for a model. Hustlers have a more difficult time understanding that you do have the cash for their asking price but are unwilling to fork it over. With them, it makes sense if you say something they can relate to, such as, "Today is the thirteenth of the month. I don't get paid until the fifteenth. I can't give you the $80 you are asking for because I need some spending money for the next two days. Could we do it for $60?"
Models who, themselves, have bills to pay are financially more sophisticated than street hustlers. They understand that even though you have $100 to your name, you would be unwilling to spend it all on them because you have other financial obligations.
When no price is mentioned in a model's ad the question of his fee will come up during the phone conversation. He might say, "I charge $100."
"For an in or an out call?" the client may ask. (In calls are supposed to be less expensive than out calls.)
"I make only out calls."
"One hundred is more than I can pay. If we did it during the day, when you probably don't have many clients, would it be possible for you to adjust the price?" There needs to be some way for the model to come down in price with dignity. If you work days, you can ask,
"How about Saturday morning?" The reaction of the model will depend, first, on how much business he has and, second, whether he feels comfortable with you and your sexual scene. Once you become a model's regular, additional special arrangements can be made.
From handling Jacinto's calls, I learned how the fee can be negotiated even if it is stated in the ad. (The whole purpose of stating the fee in the ad is
not
to have to discuss it during the phone interview.) Jacinto advertised that he charged $50 for a massage. A few callers inquired whether he would charge them only $40 for a forty-five- minute massage. He always accommodated them because he needed the income. I spoke to one forty-dollar client. He
grossed
$11.50 an hour. Jacinto
netted
$50 for the same period of time. The client would have had to work the better part of a day to be touched by Jacinto's magic fingers! No wonder he wanted to pay less than the stated fee.
* * *
Most important for all hustlers and models is that the client not give them a hard time. This is not so much related to what the client does or wants done, but how he goes about it. (After the first meeting the hustler knows whether he can handle the physical part of the assignment.) A hustler told me about a favorite client of his who is into infantilism, which involves changing the client's wet diaper, feeding him baby food, playing baby-mind games, and so on. Since his client goes about it in a good-hearted and natural way the hustler does not mind, in spite of the messiness. The same hustler complained about another client who pays well for late night calls, but irks him with his maudlin drunken demands that next time around they have sex for free.
After a few excellent sexual sessions, preceded or followed by a pleasant conversation, there is a temptation to "normalize" the relationship between client and hustler, that is, do without the money exchange. The client's rationale is that the hustler
obviously
enjoys the encounter just as much as he himself, so why pay the former? Dispensing with the money part becomes even more tempting if the client goes out of his way to do the hustler special favors.
7
Do not succumb to this temptation because you will be disappointed in the hustler's totally negative reaction.
7
. In the next chapter, I will discuss more fully what clients can expect when doing favors for hustlers. But even when it seems clear to the client that free sex should be part of the package—as when inviting a hustler to vacation in Hawaii—this needs to be discussed ahead of time. Don Leo took a model to Honolulu for a week's vacation. The hustler refused to have sex with him because, he said, he had assumed that Don Leo only wanted his companionship.
Hustlers run a business. The good session and pleasant conversation do not change the business arrangement—it just makes it more enjoyable for both parties. I am sure that had I connected with Maestro Jed at a bathhouse and persisted in chasing him, we would have had free sex with each other once or twice a year—when Jed was horny enough, the time was convenient for him, and if, miraculously, he still had my phone number. Jed got paid for being available to me when I was homy, and when it was convenient for me. Without the monetary inducement, Jed would have preferred watching TV while doing drugs.