Goaded at last, Selina said coldly, “You know nothing of the matter, Mr. Rushton. I find it absurd that you should take such an interest in Henry when you have just met him. He has lived here for five years and has had the run of Shalbrook. He shoots and rides, takes an interest in the farming, drives a phaeton, any number of things. To be sure it is a pity there are no young men of his age in the neighborhood, but we make an annual visit to one of the watering places where he quickly forms friendships with his contemporaries. I do not unduly restrict his movements, and in fact did not protest his decision to go hunting. He’s only sixteen, for God’s sake. There is plenty of time for him to do the exploring of which you speak. Just leave us in peace.”
“You would like that, wouldn’t you? To continue to hold sway over him? To keep him like a lapdog for your entertainment? I have seen it happen before, Miss Easterly-Cummings. I watched powerlessly as my aunt stifled all the spirit in my cousin. As a boy he was full of life, forever up to a lark, but after his father died she tied him to her apron-strings and never let him go. Even now she is dead, he does not break loose. The habits of a lifetime are too well ingrained. He is a pathetic case, and I should not like to see your cousin follow in his footsteps.”
“Your reasoning is ludicrous, Mr. Rushton,” she snapped. “I have no intention of stifling Henry’s exuberance, nor keeping him around to amuse myself. He has been preparing for university, where he will no doubt learn all the wonderful masculine sports—drinking, gambling, women. His life will be so truly enriched,” she said scornfully. “Do you know what Henry wants to do? He wants to learn about farming. We have just reached an agreement where he will drop his studies for a time to learn something of a practical nature. It is not I who chain him to a desk, but the wishes of his guardian that he be prepared for Oxford or Cambridge.”
Rushton narrowed his eyes and said coldly, “I imagine you believe that, Miss Easterly-Cummings. You are deluding yourself. If you did not want to keep him here with you, he would probably be at school this very minute, as he should be.”
“Yes, he should be!” she stormed. “He should have gone to school five years ago. Do you know why he didn’t? No, of course you don’t. And I dare say you don’t care, either, so long as you can point a self-righteous finger at me. I am doing the best I can. There’s no one else to do it for him.”
“There should be a male hand guiding his upbringing,” Rushton said more evenly. “You spoke of a guardian. Who is that?”
“An acquaintance of Henry’s late father, chosen more for his proximity to the Forrester estate than for his wisdom, I fear.”
“What is his name?” When she did not answer, he said, “Come, ma’am, I can easily find out. Penrith probably knows, or the boy himself would not hesitate to inform me.”
Selina moistened her lips and asked, “Why do you want to know? What are you going to do?”
“If he is someone I know, I might have some influence in getting him to take more interest in the boy’s welfare. You are not in a position to introduce your cousin to the masculine world of sports he longs to partake of. You are crippling him, Miss Easterly-Cummings, and I do not mean that slight limp he has.
That
will not interfere with his enjoyment, but your smothering him in cotton wool will.”
Unhappily, Selina rose and walked to the window where she stood looking out. “Tell me, Mr. Rushton, is your interest in doing Henry good, or me harm? If it is the latter, you could certainly have chosen no better weapon than Henry. But do not think that I will allow you to ruin his life without a fight. I freely acknowledge that I am not always capable of providing him with all the guidance he should have, and that I am more protective of him than I should be. I continually struggle to overcome that failing. On the other hand, I cannot believe that his guardian would provide him with a more appropriate home. Here Henry has affection, a family connection, a home. His guardian is a cold man, with quite a large family, who has visited Henry only three times since he has been here. At first he intended to take Henry with him…” Unable to continue, Selina leaned her head against the window-pane and fought to control the tears which threatened. Her distress was evident to Rushton, who had risen to his feet when she did, and now pulled a chair over to where she stood and gently pushed her into it. Not capable of facing him, Selina turned her head away and covered her face with her hands.
“Miss Easterly-Cummings, I assure you I have no wish to harm you. And I am not suggesting that Henry be taken away from you as though you were some unfit mother. But the boy needs a masculine influence in his life.” He would not ask her again who Henry’s guardian was; she was too precariously maintaining her composure as it was. “Why didn’t he go to school?”
For a moment Selina did not answer, and then she began to speak in a low voice that Rushton had to come closer to hear. “When my father died, Henry’s family journeyed here to attend the funeral. They were all in a coaching accident. His mother and father and sister were killed, and Henry was brought to Shalbrook more dead than alive. Dr. Turner didn’t think he would live, and for some weeks... But he did live, the poor frightened little thing. He was only eleven then, and lost without his family. Lord Leyburn came then and tried to take him away, but Dr. Turner said the journey would surely kill him. So he stayed here with me, and I nursed him and cried with him and came to love him as my brother.” Selina rubbed fiercely at her eyes. “He couldn’t walk for two years.”
“Two years!”
“Yes, but I worked with him every day, and we went to places with hot springs which sometimes seemed to help, and sometimes didn’t. Even when he could walk, he had a great deal of trouble at first; the limp was almost grotesque then. We worked and worked together, and now it is hardly noticeable. That is why he didn’t go to school, Mr. Rushton. And all those years of enforced inactivity. . . well, we studied together, then, and he is a very promising student. He has not chafed under his studies until recently. But now... He is growing up, and I don’t quite know what to do with him. Please don’t misunderstand me! I adore Henry and want only what is best for him, and am only too aware that I shouldn’t hover about him like a mother hen. But all those years of broken bones! To watch him ride off to the hunt... He thinks nothing of it, of course, and I should be happy that he can forget all his past experiences so readily. It is not as simple for me.”
Rushton said softly, “Penrith told me none of this.”
“I don’t think he knew, really. None of them did outside Shalbrook. Oh, they heard that the boy was unwell, but you don’t expect to see an eleven-year-old out in Society, so they didn’t think much of it. I was far too busy to continue in Society myself, so we became rather isolated here.” Selina looked at him and spoke hesitantly. “I should not have bored you with all this, Mr. Rushton, but I want you to understand that you are only partially right. My fondest wish is not to keep Henry with me, but for him to grow into a gentleman of honesty, courage and kindness who will enjoy the world about him, and benefit it as well for his presence. Right now he is confused. He feels restricted, and yet he is not sure exactly what he wants to do. Perhaps after all it would have been best to send him to school this last year, but his tutor advised Lord Leyburn against it.”
“Why?”
“Dr. Davenport, his tutor, is inordinately proud of Henry’s progress under him, and thought he could better prepare him for university.” Selina bit her lip and looked away. “I admit that I did not protest his decision. I thought it might be difficult for Henry at his age to suddenly find himself amidst boys who all knew each other and had been to school for some years.” Not knowing why she did it, she asked, “Was that wrong of me?”
“You were protecting him again,” he replied, but not with anger. “I think you would have found that he adjusted very easily. Why have you not asked Lord Leyburn’s assistance?”
“I don’t like him,” Selina replied frankly. “How could anyone be so heartless as to suggest that Henry be taken away when he was obviously unfit? Lord Leyburn came back a year later…”
“And?”
“Henry was still unable to walk, of course. I could see the disgust in the man’s eyes when he looked at Henry, and he spoke of his six healthy children at home as though Henry were some kind of freak. Can you imagine what would have happened if he had taken Henry?” Selina shuddered in remembrance.
“How did it come about that Henry stayed?”
“There were some difficult interviews.” Agitated, Selina rose and began to pace the room. “Lord Leyburn said I was far too young to have charge of a boy his age. I told him that I had done very well so far and felt confident that I could continue to do so. He was not impressed, but he really did not want Henry in his home. In order to convince him, I... told him I expected to be married, and could thus provide a more usual home for Henry. He accepted that for the time being.”
“And were you to be married?” Rushton asked curiously.
“I thought so at the time.”
“I see. When you didn’t marry, what happened?”
“Oh, Leyburn came again a year or so later, all puffed up with his concern and self-righteous indignation that I had lied to him. It was the time when Henry was beginning to walk, but very…awkwardly. Undoubtedly, Lord Leyburn had intended to take Henry away with him that time, but he really could not bear the sight of a cripple. Never once did he try to talk to Henry, or find out what he was like. I had the happy inspiration of suggesting that Lord Leyburn provide a tutor for Henry here, so that he need not leave. The solution recommended itself to him.”
“And he has not come again?”
“No. He writes a note with Henry’s quarterly allowance, and has regular reports from Dr. Davenport. We seldom hear from him otherwise. I have suggested that Henry write and tell him he wishes to learn something of farming and ease off his studies for a while, though I fear that may provoke him into coming here.”
“He would not be disgusted by Henry now.”
“No.”
“You are afraid he would take your cousin away from you?”
Selina gazed abstractedly at the piles of paper on the floor as she fingered a volume lying open on the table. “Yes.”
“Has his guardian boys of Henry’s age?”
“One five years older and one much younger. The rest are girls.”
“I can see no value in his going to them, then. And you are probably wrong that Lord Leyburn would want the responsibility of another member in his household. It seems to me he is relieved that he doesn’t have to give Henry any thought.”
Her chin came up and she asked with only the slightest shake in her voice, “So you will not find it necessary to urge Lord Leyburn to involve himself in Henry’s affairs
?”
Rushton was struck by her vulnerability, and moved forward to possess himself of one of her hands. “I told you I had no wish to harm you, Miss Easterly-Cummings. Disabuse yourself of that idea, I beg you. My annoyance at your high-handedness and your questioning of my word, as it seemed to me, are not matters over which I would set out to destroy your happiness.” He offered a wry grin. “I felt sure my ignoring you at Oak Park the other day was sufficient punishment for that.”
“Did you?” Selina asked with an uncertain laugh, very aware that he retained her hand in his clasp. “I assure you I was crushed by your obvious displeasure with me.”
“I must be losing my perceptiveness, for I didn’t see that at all. You appeared totally impervious to my snub,” he retorted as he reluctantly allowed her to withdraw her hand.
Serious eyes met his hesitantly. “I never meant to... irritate you, Mr. Rushton. Sometimes, from managing on my own for so long, I forget the social amenities and step on someone’s toes. From organizing my own life and Henry’s, I fear I unthinkingly take liberties that I should not. And I have just scolded Henry for doing the same,” she said, wonderingly. “It is easier to see faults in others than in ourselves.”
Rushton made no attempt to answer, fascinated by the way her brows contracted when she puzzled over her own behavior.
Chapter Thirteen
Suddenly Selina recalled how their interview had begun, and that he was not, after all, someone with whom she should speak so openly. “Now then, if you would have a seat, Mr. Rushton, I believe you wished to discuss the Sands’ glassed-in room.”
Her abrupt change of manner, from confiding to businesslike, unaccountably disappointed him, though he had often said that emotional women were the very devil to deal with. During the entire interview, she had not, it was true, shed a single tear, though she had been on the verge several times, and only restrained by an obvious effort of will. As she seated herself, her dignity resumed in spite of the dusty smock and the disheveled hair, Rushton remained standing. “I was at fault to barge in on you as I did, Miss Easterly-Cummings, and impertinent to suggest that I best knew how your cousin should be reared. Do not let me detain you further from your work.”
Selina smiled and said, “Let us leave off apologies now, Mr. Rushton. I am sure they could occupy the two of us for the rest of the day, and we would never discuss anything of importance. Did you like the Sands’ glass room?”
“Very much,” he admitted as he seated himself in a chair opposite her. “However, the one Lord John has designed for me would be a great deal larger, and more prominent, as it opens off both the drawing and dining rooms. And I have little interest in indoor horticulture.”
“Could you draw me the layout, so that I would understand how the rooms are placed?”
“Certainly.” He rose and walked to the desk.
“There is paper in the top left-hand drawer.”
In addition to a neatly arranged stack of paper, and a wooden tray with a number of pens, there was a delicate glass box with a red velvet floor on which rested two faded roses. From whom? Rushton wondered. And why hidden away in a desk drawer in the library rather than displayed on her vanity? He quickly drew forth a sheet of paper and chose a well-sharpened pen before carefully closing the drawer so as not to jar its contents. Without looking at Miss Easterly-Cummings, he dipped the pen in the standish and began to draw a rough sketch of Lord John’s design for his hunting-box.