A Dom's Dilemma (19 page)

Read A Dom's Dilemma Online

Authors: Kathryn R. Blake

She dove under the pillow. Kelly didn’t believe he purposefully intended to hurt her, but the first touch of the lotion on her sore buttocks had all the subtlety of a blow torch on sunburned flesh. She screamed and almost arched off the bed.

“Muffle your noise, sub,” he ordered as he continued to gently rub the lotion around.

A thousand fire ants were now attacking her behind, so Kelly screamed again into the pillow.

“I’m only hearin’ screamin’, sub, and I want to hear the countin’ I ordered you to start. Now count. Ten!”

She cried out ten under her pillow, suspecting he was doing this only to torture her, but as she called eight she realized she was already feeling relief.

“Good, girl,” he praised. “You’re beginnin’ to relax now. Seven!”

She repeated the word seven as he commanded, but it was on a sigh as she raised her head and placed it back on top of the pillow she’d been using to help muffle her screams.

* * * *

“I really did a job on you, didn’t I?” Jim asked, not expecting an answer. He continued to spread the lotion until Kelly began making little pleasure moans in the back of her throat. Then, he decided to drive the reason for this exercise home, “Repeat to me what lessons you learned today, sub.”

“Tired,” she responded, closing her eyes.

“Kelly, I’m serious. I never, never, never want to have to punish you that way again. So I wanna make sure you learned the right lessons.” When she hesitated, he added, “Because, darlin’ you’re gonna be feelin’ the effects of this punishment for a long, long time to come. So, let’s make sure it was worth it.”

Lifting her head off her pillow she gave him an unhappy scowl, but his answering look of warning had her meekly lying back down again with a sigh, “Never disobey one of your direct orders.”

“Good. What else?”

“Never come to your workplace without permission.”

“Very good. What else?”

She thought about it for a moment, then said, “Don’t mouth off or attempt to strike back at you in anger … ever.”

“Excellent,” he agreed. “That’s probably the most important lesson you needed to learn from today. Those two transgressions got you in nearly as much trouble as disobeyin’ me did. Now, what else did you learn?”

* * * *

Kelly gave another long sigh. She really didn’t want to do this anymore, especially since the last lesson was the one that hurt the most. Finally, she said, “Never display a show of affection toward you in public.”

When he didn’t answer for a moment, she got worried. That was what she’d done that had gotten him so angry, wasn’t it? All she’d wanted was to show him how deeply she felt and he’d pushed her away.

She guessed she tensed, because he said, “Easy, darlin’. Be still now. I’m not angry, I’m just thinkin’.”

“Wasn’t that right?” she asked turning to gaze up at him.

He appeared to be seriously considering her question. “Well, I do believe it was a lesson you learned today, although it’s not one I meant to teach.”

“What do you mean?”

“Kelly, you’re a very demonstrative person, which isn’t necessarily bad, even though it is inappropriate for our current situation.”

She shook her head. “I’m not sure I understand. Do you want me to touch you or not?”

He bent down to place a kiss on her hair. “Darlin’, of course I want you to touch me, but you shouldn’t do it without my permission. You do know that is one of the rules, don’t you, Kelly?”

Kelly turned her face away to hide her tears. They were back to the D/s rules again. She had to follow the set guidelines and stay within the finely drawn lines, or she was violating the protocol of their relationship.

“Kelly…. Hush, darlin’. I’m not sayin’ this to upset you, even though I can tell that I am. Thursday night I agreed to be your Dom and you said you wanted to be my sub. So, that is the relationship I am more than happy to have with you.
But
, and I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but it is the only one I am willing to have with you right now. I think you need a strong Dom to master you, and you’ve got to admit that we are still gettin’ to know each other. That means I’m establishin’ the rules, and you’re establishin’ your limits, which I’m supposed to keep testin’ and pushin’ a little.”

“Do you mean 24/7?” she asked, turning to look at him again.

“Actually, doll, that’s not my style, or my preference, but I made some serious mistakes with you last night, and I seem to be makin’ more of those same mistakes today, so I think we should stick to protocol until I, as your Dom, determine you are ready to move on to a more relaxed relationship. I did a lot more than push your limits today, Kelly, I set ‘em. Not in stone, precisely, but certainly in concrete. As we grow and build our connection, we can slowly chip away at that cement, which’ll give you a bit more wiggle room to move about and expand. But for now, any movin’ I allow you will be with my collar and leash real tight around your neck. That means I expect you to obey every command I give you without hesitation or comment. And that’s how I expect things to be between us for quite a while.

“So … what? You think I still need to be paper trained, or taught to sit, stay and heel before you want to consider me as anything but your sub?”

Frowning, he drew back for a second, then bent forward again. “That’s exactly the sort of thing that got you here to begin with, Kellian Sarah Franklin. You’re takin’ offense and snappin’ at me, and I should be smackin’ your butt instead of tryin’ to reassure you. Except, I am not a Dom who likes his subs afraid, or in a great deal of pain. I don’t mind a bit of sass, as long as it comes with respect. But, darlin’, your display today was intolerable for a sub, and unforgivable for a slave. What you did in that reception area broke
all
the rules of BDSM relationships. Every single one of ‘em.”

“I’m sorry,” she said softly. “I didn’t mean to–”

“Yeah, I know you’re sorry, but that doesn’t change the fact you disobeyed me, and unfortunately you’re gonna have a really sore bottom to keep remindin’ you that’s not a wise thing for you to do.” He hesitated for a moment as he simply regarded her. Then he said, “You and I need to have a long talk soon about what we expect from each other, and where we see this relationship goin’. I deeply regret we had such a rocky start, and I realize I’m partially to blame, but one question remains…. Will you be able to find happiness and satisfaction in a Dom/sub relationship with me?”

“Is there any chance we could build any other sort of relationship right now?”

“No, darlin’. That’s not what I’m after. I realize that isn’t what you want to hear, Kelly, but I’m not sure I can offer you what you do want. Not yet, at least.”

“Then, Sir, my answer would have to be yes.”

He gave her a nod. “You say that now, but I’m not convinced you fully understand what you’re acceptin’. So, how ‘bout for now, I lay out one simple rule you will need to obey, or be punished. That is: you must always show the proper respect owed to a Dom, focusing on this Dom especially.”

She turned away from him again, but this time he called her on it. “Kelly, I want you to at least look at me while we have this conversation. When she turned back, he wiped a tear from her eye. “You think I’m bein’ unreasonable to insist on this?”

“No, Sir. As my Dom, you’re making a perfectly reasonable request.”

“You think I’m not bright enough to hear the ‘but’ in that sentence, little girl? Well, I do hear it, Kelly, and I even understand it to a point. So, let me tell you a little of what I expect from you in terms of respect. Unless I order you to take a certain position, I’d prefer you to behave naturally. By that I mean if we meet at the club, rather than droppin’ to your knees at my feet when you first see me, I expect you to bow your head in acknowledgement. You do not need to call me Master, but you do need to at least call me Sir. And you should never, ever call me, Jim.”

Kelly gazed at him through wide eyes, so he gave her chin a pinch. “Yeah, that one’s gonna be hard for you, since you’ve slipped on it five times today already, but I’m gonna have to insist you obey that one, too, for right now. This weekend will most likely be an exception, since I seriously doubt I’ll have the heart to punish you for a simple lapse in protocol after what you’ve been through, but I need you to see that my leniency today is nothin’ more than a temporary reprieve. Once you’re back to normal, slippin’ will be a punishable offense. Can you accept that?”

Kelly blinked. This really wasn’t what she wanted, at least not with him. Insisting she only call him Sir was putting up an invisible wall between them she was hoping they could tear down. She understood it was part of the D/s scene, and it was also a take it or leave it kind of thing. If she opted to leave him, they’d never get the chance to be anything more to each other, but if she agreed to stay she needed to accept she would most probably be punished if she forgot her place and treated him like a lover instead of her Dom. James Evans might believe women could be equal to men in many things, but definitely not when in an intimate relationship with him.

He kissed her again. “Why don’t we both give this some thought for a while, darlin’? I only want what I think is best for you, Kelly, and right now I think you need the stable structure that exists behind the D/s rules. You may not agree with me, which is your right, of course, but your agreement or disagreement in what I think is not part of the equation right now. I will care for you and take care of you to the best of my ability. And part of my care is also disciplinin’ you when you break a rule. I will insist upon your obedience and submission, Kelly, but I am not lookin’ for you to be obsequious or subservient to me, even though I’m not sure you understand the difference.”

“I’m not sure I do either, Sir.”

He smiled. “Well that is somethin’ else I’d be willin’ to teach you. And I will serve as your teacher, as well as your Dom. At times, I may even sound like an overprotective parent, but if you choose to stay with me, you’ll never want for care or affection. Even your punishments, as painful as they might be, will be given with your best interests at heart.

Kelly didn’t like what he was saying, but she couldn’t fault him for saying it, so she shrugged her shoulders, which earned her a firm rap on the head. She winced. “I do not punish lightly, Kelly, as I believe you’ve already learned. Nor do I punish without cause. You should always know beforehand when you’ve done somethin’ that will earn you a trip over my knee, or across the bed, or anywhere else I insist you bend over for me. So, none of my punishments should come as a surprise to you, although the method I choose to carry them out, might. Promise me you’ll give this some thought, and we’ll see where we end up Sunday night. All right?”

Kelly felt her heart lighten at his words. He was willing to protect and care for her. “You’ll want me here through Sunday?”

“Not precisely. I’m not gonna let you leave here any earlier than Sunday, although the manner in which I want you will not be satisfied until I’m certain you’re well enough to play.” Then he waggled his eyebrows at her, and she laughed.

“Your smile and laughter please me greatly, darlin’. And though your tears do not displease me or make me angry, they do distress me, which is why I am here now.”

She wanted to tell him she thought she could easily fall in love with him when he reached over to press a finger on her left buttock, which stung like a slap. Scowling at him, she said, “Ow!”

“Well, you’re definitely improvin’ after the lotion, but I’d like to do a course of ice, too, to help bring down this swellin’. It’s not gonna be comfortable at first, but I’m gonna insist you lie still and bear it for at least two minutes. If it’s still too painful after that, I’ll remove it. All right?”

Okay, he was warning her it was going to hurt, and implied the time he’d given her would also be a trial, so she asked, “Two whole minutes, Sir?”

Kelly saw Jim’s brows lower over his eyes and knew she wasn’t getting any leeway on this. “Yes, sub. Two whole minutes. I’ll keep time for you. Now lay your head down and let me do what I do best, all right?”

CHAPTER TWELVE

Jim was back in full Dom mode now, which worried her, so Kelly hesitated until the brows went up. Giving a sigh and a nod, she put her head down and closed her eyes. But opened them up again in a flash when he placed a sizzling hot blanket of burning coals on her butt. She let out a high pitched whine as she tried to hold still as he’d asked her to. After five seconds, though, she couldn’t help but jiggle her hips as she whimpered from the pain, which seemed to be growing worse instead of better.

Glancing up from his watch, he said, “You’re doin’ good, sub, but you need to lie still. I realize it’s uncomfortable, but I’m watchin’ the clock. You’ve a hundred more seconds.”

“Um, Sir? I don’t think I can….” The burning grew worse by the second until she finally grabbed his hand. “Oh, God, Jim! It really hurts! Please take it off,” she begged, tears filling her eyes. She was sorely tempted to fling away the fiery bag herself, but since that would only earn her even more disapproval from her strict Dom, she simply gripped his fingers tighter.

He placed a gently restraining hand on the small of her back to still her squirming even as he frowned and spoke with stern firmness. “Kelly, we just finished establishin’ I am your Dom. At least for right now. And as your Dom, you do not have permission to call me, Jim. Doin’ so is a punishable offense. Now, I don’t wanna be a hardass about this, but I expected you to let a coupla hours pass before you slipped again.”

Crap.
She winced at her mistake. “I’m so sorry, Sir. But I–”

“No. I’m not gonna accept any excuses from you on this. You’ve earned yourself an additional minute of ice therapy as punishment.”

Kelly moaned, but tried not to cry as she whispered, “I’m really sorry, Sir, but it hurts so much.”

He gave a nod to acknowledge he heard her. “One minute’s passed, so you’ve got two more to go.” When she gave another small whine of protest in response, he said, “You’re doin great. Even though I’m punishin’ you, it pleases me that you’re acceptin’ this pain because I’m asking you to. Minute thirty left. I know it hurts, and that makes me proud of the way you’re handlin’ it.” Her lips were so tightly clamped together all she managed to squeak out was a tiny whimper of acknowledgement.

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