“To what? Forget meeting your sweet family last night, or forget you were screwing my boyfriend?”
“Shh!”
I threw back my head and barked a short, evil-sounding laugh and then stood abruptly and moved toward my office door. I slammed it shut before turning back to face him.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. Now what was it you were saying? Something about forgetting you’re a fucking coward, a cheat, and a liar, I think. I probably left a few things out. But hey, I didn’t know you were also a devoted family man when I was cataloging the original list of reasons I thought you were a complete shit. I had no idea you
could
be bigger scum. Congrats again. You took me by surprise. Not an easy feat.”
“It seems bad, but it’s—complicated.” Clay licked his lips again and looked away.
“I bet. Well, good luck. Anything else or can I get on with my morning?”
“Don’t say anything. Please.”
“To whom?” I asked with a humorless snort.
“Anyone. I can’t—Lauren can’t know about this. She wouldn’t understand, and like I said… it’s more complicated than me having an affair.”
“’Cause you were fucking a guy? Wait. Did I get the tense correct? Is Taylor still in your bed, or was that short-term craziness brought on by a long-distance move and the pressure of making a life for your family in the big city?”
“My focus is my job and my kids. I can’t worry about the rest.”
“‘The rest’ must refer to the other people you fucked over when your cock was buried in a man’s ass.”
“You’re a piece of work, Gulden.” Clay stood abruptly and shook his head in dismay.
“And you’re a piece of shit.”
“I didn’t know Taylor was with you and—”
I moved directly into his space, miraculously curbing the urge to wrap my hands around his neck. “Bullshit! You knew exactly what you were doing. What you didn’t know was that Taylor would name names. You made a big mistake when you crossed me, Brenner. A big fuckin’ mistake.”
“What do you want from me?” His Adam’s apple slid theatrically in his throat.
I took a step back and shook my head in a show of extreme disgust. “What do you have to offer? Your ass?”
“Is that what you want? I fucked Taylor, so you fuck me and promise not to tell Lauren?”
“Wow, that’s… pathetic. There may be some fucked-up poetic justice there, but frankly, you make me sick. Don’t worry, I’ll keep quiet.” I smiled, aware the gesture probably made my features contort in a very unfriendly manner. “For now.”
“‘For now’? Zeke, I—”
“Hey, your problems aren’t mine, Brenner, and I’ve got work to do. Say hi to Lauren for me.”
“I’m not seeing Taylor anymore. I know you’re with someone new. Your boyfriend seemed nice, but… well, if you were wondering. I think Taylor’s free. That’s all.”
Was he really telling me the coast was clear and I could have my guy back? No harm, no foul? I made my way to the door and opened it with a flourish, waiting for him to take the not-so-subtle hint.
“Thanks for the heads-up.”
“Zeke….”
“We’re done here.”
We stared at each other in a heated standoff of sorts. His silent plea for my cooperation was beyond irritating. I wanted to physically push him out the door, but this situation called for a measure of thought and self-control. When he inclined his head and finally walked away, I watched his retreating form until he disappeared into a waiting elevator. I wanted to be sure he saw my disgust if he turned around again. I wanted him to stay nervous and be on guard. If he lost even a minute of sleep worrying about my intentions, I’d be thrilled. At least it would tide me over until I could think of what to do.
“Gina.”
“Yes?” Gina adjusted her stylish reading glasses as she glanced up from her computer.
Her dark hair was cut in a severe bob that accentuated her heart-shaped face and aristocratic nose. Gina’s funky accessories were her trademark. In all other ways, she was rather plain. Medium height, brown hair, brown eyes, and the tendency to dress in corporate, boring shades of blue. She paired sensible suits with over-the-top costume jewelry and reading glasses in every color known to man.
“Clay Brenner isn’t welcome to ‘stop by’ my office. Make sure he has an appointment in the future.”
Gina opened her mouth and immediately closed it and then nodded in acquiescence. Something in my gaze must have warned her I wasn’t going to offer details. Barring a coworker was an odd request; however, she was damn good at what she did. Moreover, she knew me. No doubt, she’d pay close attention to Clay to find out how he landed on my shit list and what he was up to now. Information was king. I’d be a fool not to listen to whatever my loyal secretary found out through the office grapevine. You never knew what you might learn. Or use at a later date.
FRIDAY MORNINGS
were hectic. Hell, maybe that was every day. Of course, the one day I planned to be a good son and check in on my dad at the bagel shop, I was hit with a barrage of urgent phone calls regarding my take on the Dow’s sudden surge. Okay, fine. The truth was I wanted to see Benny again, and I couldn’t think of a smooth way to do so without seeming too… interested.
When Hector pulled in front of the store at ten a.m., I was stuck on a conference call that should have ended fifteen minutes beforehand. My Bluetooth headset had been glued to my ear all morning, and my ass was numb from sitting for hours. I exited the Mercedes, signaling that I’d contact him when I was ready to go. As I reached for the door to the bagel shop, someone on the call asked the age-old question… was it time to sell or hold? I stepped away from the entrance and peeked inside at the last second. I spotted Dad behind the register. He was in his element. I could see his hands move expressively as he held court with some of his regulars and a couple of employees. I didn’t see Benny right away; however, I did recognize a familiar face I hadn’t seen in a while. Rand O’Malley. The guy next to him had to be his boyfriend, William.
I studied the two men while I considered the wisdom of selling bonds. They were both tall and lean, but that was where the similarities ended. William looked like a college student with his V-neck light blue sweater, pressed khakis, tousled sun-streaked brown hair, and glasses, while Rand looked like the rock star he was. He had dark brown, longish hair and heavily tattooed arms. His short-sleeved, black tee emphasized his toned biceps, and the basic Levi’s he wore looked hotter on him than they ever would on the average guy. They were complete opposites… the geek and the rock god. I didn’t know William, but according to my father, he was quiet and understated, while Rand was loudmouthed, vivacious, and blessed with what Dad called “the Irish gift of gab.” He had a mischievous glint in his eyes that made you want to see what he’d do next. It didn’t hurt that he was drop-dead gorgeous too.
Rand had worked at Bowery Bagels until a few months ago when his band Spiral’s third single skyrocketed to the top ten and he was forced to quit to devote himself to touring and promoting their record. Dad was sad to see him go, but it was nice to see he’d kept his promise to visit. And from the happy grin on my father’s face, he was pleased. It was all very nice, but this was exactly what I meant when I’d told Benny about my father’s reformed ways. At one point, Rand was the kind of guy Dad would have referred to as a “worthless hippy” without knowing anything about him. Now he was like the fifth Gulden son, for Christ’s sake. I refocused on the call when I felt my pulse spike. I was being an idiot. I liked Rand, and I was grateful he was a good friend to Dad.
“I say we hold for now. I’ll have Gina prep for a quick sale around noon if necessary, but let’s see what the market does in the next two hours. Right. We’ll—”
I stopped in my tracks when Benny came into view. Fuck, he was pretty. I rarely used that adjective for a man, but this time it was true. There was no trace of artificial color in his dark hair, and though I was standing on the opposite side of the glass and didn’t have the greatest view, he didn’t appear to be wearing any eyeliner or gloss either. He looked fresh, wholesome, and very fucking appealing. Heat flooded my cheeks when one of the investors on the conference call repeated my name.
“I’m here. I’ll check back with you all later. Good-bye.”
I sent a quick text message to Gina, pocketed my cell, and made my way to the front door, strangely aware of my accelerated heartbeat and clammy palms. What the hell was wrong with me? Yeah, the other night in the backseat of the Mercedes had been sexy for sure, but extenuating circumstances had led us down a path we probably would never have traversed in the light of day. Seeing Clay with his family and rehashing old family war stories and secrets over a couple bottles of wine had lent a surreal quality to an average Wednesday night. However, this was Friday morning. An ordinary day spent doing ordinary things. Spinning over seeing Benny now made no sense. I thought the butterflies would fade in the daylight.
No such luck.
“Ezekiel!” Dad exclaimed. The indulgent twinkle in his eye made me smile. My shoulders relaxed as I stepped forward to greet everyone.
“How’s it goin’, Zeke?” Rand grinned and gave me a bro handshake.
“Good. Congratulations, by the way. I hear your songs on the radio every day, man. They must have your band on heavy rotation.”
“Don’t make his head swell. He needs to fit through the door,” William quipped, poking Rand in the ribs playfully.
Rand squeezed his boyfriend around the waist and planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek. “This guy keeps it real. Have you met Will?”
Will leaned into Rand’s side as he reached out to shake my hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you, but I don’t think we’ve met.”
We exchanged pleasantries while my father looked on like the proud papa he was, or a satisfied matchmaker. I caught his shifting gaze the second Benny rounded the corner. We were next. Dad probably assumed the fact I’d abandoned my office midmorning on a stressful Friday under the guise of checking on him was proof positive something was up. And damn, this time he’d be right.
Benny smiled as he approached us. “Hi, Zeke. How are you?”
“I’m good. You?” I asked in a polite conversational tone very much at odds with my racing pulse.
“Excellent.”
Sweat beaded on my forehead. My fingers tingled with a desire to touch him. His hair, his mouth, his chin. Suddenly I was in the backseat of my car with him straddling my thighs and commanding me to finger his—fuck. Damn… it was hot in here. I was tempted to loosen my tie, but I’d only give myself away. It wasn’t unseasonably warm. It was me. This was a bad idea, I mused, searching frantically for a topic that wouldn’t bring attention to my internal angst or my semihard cock. I turned to Rand and leaned casually against the counter.
“Are you touring soon? I heard something about Europe,” I prodded.
“Yeah, we leave at the end of the month. As soon as Will’s done with school. We’re trying to convince Benny to come with us. He won’t do it. This guy is the quintessential New Yorker. We can’t get him to leave the city.”
“I told you I—” Benny sputtered indignantly.
“I know, I know.
La familia.
You
are
helping us with the local shows, right?”
“Of course,” he said in a perturbed tone.
“Help how?” I was puzzled by the cryptic exchange, and I was evidently the only one who didn’t get the meaning. Dad didn’t seem confused in the slightest.
“Benny’s our stylist. He mainly handles our guitarist’s wardrobe. The guy’s a genius. But he won’t travel. It’s okay… we’ll send postcards.” Rand reached out to pinch Benny’s cheek and had his hand immediately smacked. “Ow.”
I chuckled at the exchange and Benny’s put-upon reaction. “No traveling?”
“I don’t like flying and… my family needs me.” He shrugged. He glanced toward the front door when the bell overhead chimed as though hoping for a distraction, and then back at me.
We stared at each other for a little longer than necessary, and fuck me, but I couldn’t remember what the hell we were talking about.
“There’s nothing Benjamin can’t do!” my father exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. “He works three jobs… cooking, sewing, waiting on customers… and he still manages to care for his family. Hello, Mr. Welsh!” Dad waved at one of his own long-standing customers and turned to greet the older man with a firm handshake.
I kept my eye on Dad for a moment, hoping it would keep me from embarrassing myself any further. The goo-goo eyes had to stop.
“Mr. G looks good,” Rand observed. “Back to himself.”
“He does,” I agreed. “Hey, I want to thank you for everything you did that morn—”
Rand waved off my thanks with a sad smile. “No thanks necessary. I’m glad we were here. It scared the fuck out of me. Life has a weird way of reminding you how fragile we really are.”
“True. If there’s anything I can do—”
Rand held up a hand to stop me. “He’s my friend, Zeke. He was there for me when I needed him too. I’m glad I could help. We all were.” He gestured toward William and Benny. “Besides, Abe’s been sending homemade rugelach, and he was pretty adamant about giving us free bagels for life. I think we’re set,” he joked, threading his fingers through his boyfriend’s. “Ready?”
William nodded. After a short round of good-byes, the two men headed for the door, stopping to hug my dad before they left. I watched their interaction, but in truth, Benny had my complete attention. I wished we were alone. I wanted to push him over that counter, pull his tight jeans over his ass, and bury myself inside him. I wanted to run my fingers down his back and hear those sexy noises he made the other night. I wanted—
“Whatcha thinking, Zeke?” His smile was slow. A lopsided upturn of his generous mouth that morphed into a wide, sunny grin.
I found myself returning the gesture with a somewhat lascivious twist. “I was thinking about the last time I saw you and how I loved fingering your ass. I can’t wait to do it again. How about you?”
Okay. That wasn’t what I’d rehearsed. I was supposed to be resetting expectations, not crudely attempting to finagle a redo of the other night.