A Matter of Choice (27 page)

“Like you ate what I left you yesterday? And the day before?”

Allison ignored her concern.

“You have to eat something, Allison. You’ll become ill if you don’t.”

“I know you’re concerned, but there’s no need. I’m fine.”

“At least have a cup of tea.”

She tried to smile. “I will later. I’d like to be alone now. I have some letters to write and am nearly finished with this book. Perhaps when I’m—“

“David wants to see you. He wants you to join him downstairs.”

“I’m terribly tired. Tell him I’ll be down later.”

There was a long pause before Lynette said, “It’s important, Allison. Joshua’s solicitor is here to see you.”

The air left her body. “Tell him I’m not receiving guests. Ask him to come back later.”

“I can’t. David sent me with instructions to have you come down. They’re waiting for you in the study. Now, drink some tea and eat a little before you have to meet with them.”

Her world shrank around her. The air grew thinner until she couldn’t breathe. She tightened her fists around the rose floral cushion beneath her and hung on to keep from losing her balance.

“Here, Allison.” Lynette held out a cup of tea and refused to move until she took it.

She took one sip then handed it back, her hands too unsteady to hold it in her lap.

“Is Joshua there too?”

“No.”

She braced her shoulders with a bravado she far from felt, then set the book on the cushion and stood. Her legs wanted to crumble beneath her but she took a fortifying breath and forced herself to move.

One by one she made her way to the bottom of the steps, determined to mask her emotions so they wouldn’t see how Joshua had hurt her. More determined to hide her breaking heart.

There was only one reason Joshua would send his solicitor.

Her heart thundered in her breast as she made her way across the marble foyer and stood at the study door. Heaven help her. She couldn’t face this yet.

The door stood open and she took a deep breath of resolve, praying she could survive this next step. When she entered the room, both men rose. David walked over to her and held out his hand.

“Allison, this is Mr. Graham, Joshua’s solicitor.” He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Lady Montfort.” Mr. Graham bowed politely. “It is a pleasure to meet you.”

She looked at him, vaguely recalling seeing him at Graystone Manor. He was very distinguished-looking, tall and broad-shouldered, his hair tinged with silver, his eyes brimming with intelligence. But what struck her first was his air of confidence. He was an impressive man, a man she could not imagine hesitant on any point.

“How do you do, Mr. Graham. It is a pleasure to meet you, too. I recall you came to see my husband… Lord Montfort at Graystone Manor, but we were not introduced.”

“No, Lady Montfort. An omission I’m glad has been rectified. I only wish we were meeting under more pleasant circumstances.”

The air caught in Allison’s throat and she wiped her damp palms on her checkered muslin skirt. The worry that sat like an anvil on her chest suddenly seemed more burdensome.

“Come in and sit down, Allison.” David ushered her to a chair. “Mr. Graham has some business to discuss with you. Would you like me to leave or would you prefer that I stay.”

“No, David. Please, stay.”

David nodded. “Can I offer you some tea, Mr. Graham? Allison?”

Mr. Graham declined the offer, and Allison shook her head, too.

“Then perhaps we should begin.”

Mr. Graham nodded, then opened the dark leather folder he had with him. “As I’m sure you are aware, Lady Montfort, I am your husband’s solicitor. Because of recent…events, there are a number of items that need to be discussed.”

She swallowed hard, the ache in her chest becoming more painful. The first signs of disaster stared her in the face and seemed to suck her under as if she’d stepped into a quagmire of sinking sand. “This is not a good time, Mr. Graham.” She tried to keep her voice steady. “I am quite busy.”

“Then I will be as direct as possible. I am here because of the terms of your marriage contract, my lady. Lord Montfort realizes you see the…events that happened as a breach of the promises he made, and intends to see that each stipulation he agreed to before your marriage is met.”

It was too soon. She didn’t want to face this now. Every demand she’d insisted be a part of their marriage contract flashed before her. The paper she’d forced him to sign as well as the vow he’d given her on their wedding day—that if she ever found him unfaithful he would lose it all. A desperate voice screamed in denial. She didn’t want it to come to this.

She lifted her head, jutting out her chin in a show of defiance. “I don’t want to discuss this, Mr. Graham. I have not asked my husband to meet the terms of our contract.”

“That may be, Lady Montfort. But your husband was quite insistent it be handled today.”

Her eyes focused intently on Mr. Graham, trying to interpret his thoughts. He skillfully kept his emotions well concealed.

“This,” he said, handing her a paper, “is the deed to your husband’s London townhouse. Along with the keys. As you can see, it is deeded in your name.”

She stared at the paper as if it was a snake that could bite her. Then she looked at the keys as if they would burn her when she touched them.

“Please, take them, Lady Montfort. They are yours.”

She stared at them, wishing them to disappear. Knowing what Joshua was telling her by giving them to her.

Her chest hurt as if he’d plunged a knife into it, but she was left with no choice. With trembling fingers she reached for the paper and the keys, then placed them in her lap.

“And this,” he said, handing her a thicker packet of papers, “is a complete listing of all Lord Montfort’s financial assets and accounts. There is an itemized, detailed listing of how every pound of your dowry was spent and the amount still remaining. The balance of your dowry will now, of course, revert back to you, as was stipulated in the original contract, along with other accounts held in the marquess’s name. You now have complete control of all the marquess’s money.”

She hesitated, then numbly reached for the papers Mr. Graham held out to her. This was the bargain they’d struck, the terms she’d insisted upon. This was what she’d agreed she’d get, and he’d agreed to give up. And she knew taking them would change the rest of her life. Would make their separation more irreversible.

“These,” he said, lifting a third set of papers, “are the deeds to all other Ashbury properties and estates not entailed. Lord Montfort freed them from debt with the money from your dowry and therefore considers them rightfully yours. The only assets not covered by your agreement are the entailed Ashbury holdings. Those will, when the present Duke of Ashbury dies, pass on to the Ashbury heir.”

She was past feeling. She numbly placed these papers on her lap along with the rest. This was Joshua’s legacy. This was what he’d sacrificed his freedom to save. What he’d married her to gain. What he’d battled his father to protect. Her heart ached with a pain she didn’t know how to ease.

“And this...” He held out a single piece of yellowed parchment paper. “...is the deed to Graystone Manor. It is now yours.”

Her heart shattered inside her. He’d given her Graystone Manor. He’d given up the home that meant more to him than everything he would have gained as the next Duke of Ashbury. The only place he’d ever been happy. The place where his mother rested in her grave.

She looked at the growing pile of papers on her lap. At the mounting wealth she’d acquired, and felt physically ill.

“There is one more item to cover, Lady Montfort. This is not a part of the marriage contract but is a special request made by the Marquess of Montfort. First, he agrees in writing that he will not contest your filing for divorce and will agree to whatever reasons you choose to give the courts. He does ask, however, that you wait to proceed with the divorce until you are certain you are not carrying a child.”

She couldn’t stop the gasp that sucked the air from her. A babe. Joshua’s babe. Her hand trembled when she moved it to her stomach. What would she do if she were pregnant with his child?

“If you do find yourself with child, Lord Montfort asks that you wait until the babe is born before you proceed with the divorce. To eliminate any question that the child is Lord Montfort’s rightful heir, as well as the future Duke of Ashbury.”

She couldn’t listen to any more. On legs she prayed would support her, she stood. The papers fluttered to the floor. She left them lay. “I’m quite tired now and would like to retire.”

“One more detail, Lady Montfort,” Mr. Graham said before she’d reached the door. “Lord Montfort said to remind you that he signed his name to the contract knowing full well the ramifications. He realizes therefore, that there is no choice for either of you.”

She remained motionless, trying to stop the panic building inside her from suffocating her. She only had to hold out until she could be alone. “Thank you, Mr. Graham.” She took another step toward the door.

“I’m sorry, my lady, but there was nothing I could do once Lord Montfort demanded the terms of the marriage contract be met.”

Another surge of pain attacked her. With a nod she made her way to the door. She stopped when she reached the other side of the room and turned.

Her gaze focused on the papers scattered on the floor. Papers that mattered more to Joshua than anything. Estates she’d never seen, money left from a dowry that was more a curse than a blessing, the townhouse where they’d made love the first time.

She stared at the keys the solicitor had given her. “Do you know where he’s staying?”

“I’m sorry, my lady. Lord Montfort did not disclose his place of residency.”

“What income does he have to live on?”

“I’m not aware of that either, my lady. All I know is that he signed everything over to you. As for any other source of income, I’m not aware that he has one.”

She swallowed the lump lodged in her throat and walked out of the room, leaving behind the pile of papers that was the sum and substance of her life. Deeds to homes and estates that were to replace her husband. An astronomical wealth that was to be her substitute for a love she wasn’t sure she could live without.

He’d given her everything. Even Graystone Manor. There was nothing more she could take from him.

+++

A week had gone by since Mr. Graham had been to visit her. Or perhaps it had been a month. She wasn’t sure. There were no days, or nights, or morning, or evenings. Only never-ending hours filled with pain and longing. And an emptiness that stole from her a will to live.

That was why she was here. She couldn’t go on like this any longer. She had to find him.

She stepped out of the carriage in front of the Marquess of Chardwell’s townhouse and stared at the imposing front entrance. She wasn’t exactly sure why she’d come here. Other than perhaps he knew where Joshua stayed. Could tell her if he was all right.

She’d already been to Joshua’s townhouse, the house she’d taken from him by default. She’d pounded on the door, doing nothing but rousing Converse from his bed in the early, predawn hours.

Joshua wasn’t there, but then she knew he wouldn’t be. He’d made an exit from her life. The keys his solicitor had given her were proof.

“What if I told you that Lady Paxton drugged me to make it appear that we’d had an affair?”

His words echoed in her mind. Night after night she’d paced the floor, sifting through what was true and what was a lie. What if he’d told her the truth? What if nothing had happened between them? What if that ugly scene had been a terrible ruse to make it look like they were having an affair? To discredit him? Ruin him? Take everything away from him?

What if it hadn’t been?

What if what she saw had actually happened? What if he was having an affair and she’d walked in on them? What if he didn’t care for her enough to give their marriage even two months before he took a lover?

A fresh wave of hurt and anger raged within her. Hadn’t she already seen the two of them locked in a lover’s embrace with their arms twined around each other and Lady Paxton’s lips reaching for his? Hadn’t her sisters reminded her over and over not to believe their lies? That they’d promise you anything—until they got your money?

Trust me. Please.

She brushed her hand over her face and nearly turned back to her waiting carriage. There was no mistaking what she’d seen. Joshua and Lady Paxton lying nearly naked on the settee.

But perhaps, just perhaps, it wasn’t what it had seemed. If there was any chance he was telling the truth she had to find it. She didn’t want to spend the rest of her life without him if he hadn’t lied to her.

“You aren’t going to give our marriage a chance, are you?”

At that moment, she knew she couldn’t stop until she’d made every effort to discover the truth.

She walked up the steps and pounded on Chardwell’s door until a very grumpy, very surprised, butler opened the door. It was still far too early for any respectable member of the
ton
to receive visitors.

“I need to speak with the Marquess of Chardwell.” She didn’t give the man a choice as to whether or not he intended to let her enter but stepped through the doorway. She stopped in the center of the foyer.