A Merry Little Christmas (32 page)

Mum warned me about guys like him. And I had to be the idiot who fell for his lines. I feel so stupid.

The thing is I’ve messed up. Big time. But I’ve started to work things out. I want to carry on with my education. I want to have a future. And I think I’ve figured a way to do it …

‘Right, let’s have a go at the first scene, shall we? See what we’re all made of.’ Marianne had gathered her group of hopeful actors and actresses together in the village hall, which as usual, was freezing. You’d have thought when they rebuilt after the flood four years previously, someone might have managed to put in a modern heating system. But no, the boiler seemed perpetually on the blink. Every year, when she started rehearsing, Marianne swore she’d try and get it sorted out for the next year, and every year she forgot.

She was trying the children out in different combinations to work out who would get which parts. She always tried to be scrupulously fair, never picking the same girl for Mary twice, making sure that not all the angels had to have fair hair, using Steven’s talents whilst ensuring that he didn’t always get a pivotal role. It was an exhausting but necessary part of the job, but despite her best efforts, inevitably at least one mother would be unhappy and find something to complain about.

Which was why this year, she was torn. She felt Ruby Tinsall would make a lively and sparky Mary, judging by the verbal exchange she’d just had with Toby Davies, who was trying out for Joseph. To her amusement, Ruby had even improvised her own lines. But Ruby was only in Year 4, and Ruth Patterson in Year 6 had been angling for Mary for the past two years. Ruth’s mum was a notorious whinger. In the past Marianne might have been prepared to stick her neck out, but with the commitments she now had at home, she didn’t think she had the energy for a full-on fight with Danielle Patterson, Ruth’s mum. If she chose Ruby, she’d also be accused of favouritism, as everyone knew she was friends with Cat. So to counter such claims, the fact that she knew Ruby’s mum would actually go against Ruby.

‘Any thoughts so far?’ Pippa slid into a seat behind her, as they watched Nathan and George and three other boys vying for roles as shepherds. Steven, who had come home for the weekend especially for the rehearsal, refused point blank to try out for a shepherd, so Marianne was thinking of casting him as wise man, as there was a rather haunting solo she had in mind for him to sing. Then she remembered that Ruth Patterson’s brother Josh had also signed up for a wise man. Bugger. She’d probably need to give Steven something else to do. It was depressingly true what they said about squeaky wheels …

‘Well, I’d love to cast Ruby as Mary, but I think she’ll have to wait for next year,’ said Marianne, ‘otherwise I’ll never hear the end of it from Danielle.’

‘That’s a shame,’ said Pippa, ‘I think Ruby would be a fun Mary.’

‘I do too,’ said Marianne, ‘although I’m not sure Diana Carew would approve of Mary having fun …’

They both laughed at the thought of Diana’s horror of things not being presented in a manner she thought appropriate.

‘That’s great, kids,’ said Marianne, calling them all to order. ‘I think I’ve got enough to decide who’s going to play which part. Don’t worry, there will be a part for everyone, and remember girls, just because only one of you can be Mary, doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re all fabulous!’

The children laughed; it was part of Marianne’s pep talk every year to tell them they were fabulous. She went round the group handing out scripts, and carol sheets.

‘Next week, I’ll put up cast lists, and we’ll start going through the carols, but in the meantime you can all look through these to familiarise yourself with the words. See you all next time.’

There was a scrabble for the door, and the children poured out in an excited rabble to meet their patiently waiting parents.

‘How are things, by the way?’ Marianne said to Pippa when the last child was accounted for. She hadn’t seen Pippa since Halloween, and had been wondering ever since how things with her and Dan had gone.

Pippa blushed.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, Dan walked you home the other night. What happened?’

‘Nothing,’ said Pippa, blushing some more.

‘Nothing? I’m deeply disappointed,’ said Marianne.

‘Oh all right,’ said Pippa, ‘he came back.’

‘And?’

‘And, he stayed the night,’ said Pippa, ‘but we both agreed we’d take it slowly for now. So much has happened, and Dan’s still struggling with his temper. We just thought we’d ease back into things gently.’

‘I’m so pleased for you,’ said Marianne giving Pippa a hug.

‘Me too,’ said Pippa, ‘me too.’

‘So how do you find it, managing Lucy at home?’ the interviewer said from one of Pippa’s comfy armchairs, while she sat self-consciously on the sofa.

‘Well, fortunately, living in an old farmhouse, we’ve got a lot of space,’ said Pippa, ‘and we’ve been able to adapt the house to Lucy’s needs as she gets older. But it’s increasingly difficult managing her physically as she gets bigger and stronger. I have very little to spare for my two sons, which is why the support from the Sunshine Trust is so fantastic. Without the respite care package I’d have gone under years ago.’

‘And your husband?’

‘Is a great support,’ said Pippa quickly, ‘but I really don’t want to talk about him – this is about the Sunshine Trust and what it does for families like ours.’

‘So it’s been a strain on your marriage having Lucy?’

‘No!’ said Pippa quickly, ‘not at all. Dan couldn’t have been more supportive and is a wonderful father to Lucy.’

‘But?’

‘But nothing,’ said Pippa.

‘But he’s not here,’ said the interviewer, ‘have you separated?’

‘Whether we have or have not,’ said Pippa getting really riled, ‘is none of your business and has nothing to do with Lucy. Look, I really don’t want to talk about this stuff. I agreed to do an interview about the Sunshine Trust, not about my personal life.’

‘Sure, sure,’ the interviewer said smoothly. ‘I was just trying to get the back story.’

‘The back story is that without the Sunshine Trust this family would have fallen apart,’ said Pippa. ‘And for families like ours it provides an invaluable service, and allows us to cope with the challenges life presents us with. Plus Lucy loves going there, and she benefits from having time away from us too. It’s a win-win situation, which is why we’re all so devastated about losing the service.’

‘That’s great,’ said the interviewer. ‘Thanks Pippa, we’ve got a lot of material we can use there. Now would it be all right to film you looking after Lucy? And some shots with Lucy at the Sunshine Trust would be good.’

‘Yes, that would be fine,’ said Pippa. She looked at her watch. It was two o’clock. ‘Lucy comes home in an hour, but I can show you all the adaptations we’ve had to make to the house if you like.’

There followed another hour of Pippa being trailed round the house with the film crew, stopping and repeating answers to questions over and over until the director was happy with everything. By the time Lucy arrived home Pippa had had enough, but Lucy seemed thrilled to be the centre of attention so Pippa obligingly wheeled her in and out of the lounge several times, got her in and out of her chair, pretended to get Lucy ready for bed at least five times, and finally showed the difficulties of cooking tea when Lucy suddenly demanded the toilet.

I’m going to be famous, typed Lucy when they’d finished. Typically, she’d laughed through the whole thing, so Pippa hoped they’d have some positive footage of living with a child like Lucy. As she’d said to the interviewer, there was much to be positive about, ‘And the Sunshine Trust helps us all stay that way,’ she told him. ‘It’s our lifeline.’

The boys arrived home in the middle of it all with Marianne, who had helpfully picked them up from school, and cheerily took part in background shots, and spoke enthusiastically and eloquently about the impact of having Lucy in their lives. When Nathan answered the question, ‘Do you sometimes wish Lucy wasn’t in your family?’ with a perplexed, ‘But Lucy’s special and it wouldn’t be the same without her,’ and George stoutly responded ‘No, why would I?’ Pippa felt herself well up. She’d always worried that the boys had missed out because of having Lucy as a sister. What a relief that
they
didn’t see it that way.

Eventually the crew left, and Pippa had to go about actually making them tea, and actually putting Lucy to bed, before sitting down with both boys and giving them a cuddle on the sofa.

‘Thanks guys,’ she said, ‘you were great. I couldn’t have asked for two more perfect sons.’

They wriggled out of her hug with a, ‘Yuk, Mu–um!’ each, and then Nathan said, ‘Is Dad going to stay over again?’

‘Maybe,’ said Pippa. ‘Would you like him to?’

‘So long as he doesn’t get angry again,’ said Nathan.

‘Well he’s working on that,’ said Pippa. ‘So let’s take each day as it comes, shall we? And who knows, maybe we’ll be back to normal soon.’

Ha. Normal? As if she’d ever known what that meant.

Cat came into the house from two days away in London, talking about her next book and the next series of
Cat’s Country Kitchen
, with both her publishers and the TV company. She’d had more long lunches than she’d been used to for a while and a couple of late-night sessions with her agent, chewing the fat about her home situation. It had done her good to get away; given her some perspective on the situation. Anna, her agent, who had been there, done that, a decade ago with her own rebellious teens, had been a fount of sage advice.

‘You’re going to have to talk to her,’ she said. ‘However she appears to you, Mel’s a teenage girl in a lot of trouble. She needs her mum, and she needs your support. I know it’s not what you wanted for her, but like it or not, it’s happening, and the sooner you all face up to it, the better.’

‘I know,’ said Cat. ‘It’s just so hard when you’re living with it all the time. Thanks though; it’s done me good to get away.’

‘And something else to think about, I hope,’ said Anna. ‘I think it’s great they want to do another series of
Cat’s
Country Kitchen
in the spring, and the sales from
Cat’s Country Christmas
are really encouraging. Especially in this difficult economic climate.’

‘True,’ said Cat, ‘at least that’s one area of my life that I’m not making a balls-up of.’

As she opened the door, she was nearly bowled over by Ruby.

‘Mummy!’ she said giving Cat a boisterously huge hug. ‘It’s so unfair, Mrs North hasn’t made me Mary, and everyone said I was better than Ruth Patterson. And Ruth doesn’t know anything about having babies, whereas I know
all about them.
’

Ouch. Another downside of having a pregnant teen daughter – making your eight-year-old grow up far too quickly.

‘I heard that, runt,’ said Mel crossly as she came down the stairs. She had suddenly ballooned out, and she was so obviously pregnant now, Cat couldn’t believe she’d ever missed it. All those damn baggy jumpers Mel had been living in had clearly helped her cover up a lot.

‘Please don’t call your sister runt,’ said Cat automatically, and Mel bristled. Great start.

‘You okay?’ said Cat.

‘Why wouldn’t I be?’ snapped Mel.

‘No reason,’ said Cat, ‘just asking.’

She put her bag down and followed Mel into the kitchen, where James was cooking a chicken madras and Noel was pouring himself a glass of wine.

‘Hello,’ she said giving him a kiss and a hug. ‘I’ve missed you.’

‘Me too,’ said Noel, giving her a kiss on the lips.

She stood enveloped in his arms, for several long and lovely minutes. It was wonderful to be home.

‘Parents, please,’ said Paige who was sitting flicking through a magazine at the kitchen table. ‘Can’t you get a room or something?’

‘I’m allowed to snog my wife in my own home,’ said Noel, mock-seriously. ‘Besides there is no guarantee of privacy anywhere in this house, so getting a room isn’t an option.’

‘Would you like a cup of tea, Mum?’ Mel said.

‘That would be great,’ Cat said, hoping it was a peace offering. ‘I’ll just go and dump my stuff upstairs and then come down and catch up with you all.’

Five minutes later, Mel knocked on her door with the tea.

‘Thanks, love,’ said Cat. She went to hug her daughter, and was relieved to see she didn’t flinch away. ‘Mel, sweetheart, can we have a chat?’

‘Only if you’re not going to have a go,’ said Mel.

‘I’m not going to have a go,’ said Cat. ‘I was just going to say … we need to start thinking about when the baby comes. And you’re bursting out of your clothes. So I was wondering, do you fancy a shopping trip? Just you and me. How about it?’

‘I suppose,’ said Mel, noncommittal.

‘Great,’ said Cat. ‘Let’s go on Saturday. No time like the present.’

‘Fine,’ said Mel, ‘now can I go and do my homework?’

‘Sure, of course,’ said Cat with a sigh.

It wasn’t much, but it was a start. One day at a time, Cat said to herself. One day at a time.

‘I can’t believe we’ve only got two weeks left until the ball,’ said Pippa, who was poring over seating plans in Cat’s lounge. It felt incredibly cosy on a winter’s day with the fire burning in the grate. It was also exceptionally tidy, reminding Pippa she’d have to have a go at hers when she got home.

‘How on earth do you keep it so tidy?’ she asked.

‘It’s not normally like this,’ said Cat. ‘The cleaner’s just been. Right, now where were we? There are still a few tables not totally filled, aren’t there? Shall we do a quick email via the PTA at school? There are bound to be one or two people hiding in the woodwork.’

‘Good idea,’ said Pippa. ‘And I’ll leave some more fliers with Vera. She’s really good at selling tickets. It’s funny to think what a mouse she was before she met Albert. She never used to say boo to a goose.’

‘Do you think Dan will still come?’ said Cat, who had heard Pippa cursing about uneven numbers all morning.