Authors: Nancy Hopper
She closed her eyes and went up on her toes. It felt incredibly good to feel his body against hers, again. Her lips curved into a satisfied smile as their lips touched and she softly kissed him.
It was exquisite. Wonderful. She pressed her lips against his, and then teased and tasted him, just a little bit.
Tim melted inside and rolled his eyes. What did she expect him to do with that? She was turning his bones to liquid fire!
His arms pulled her closer and he plundered her in a way that left them both weak in the knees, and in agony for more. Tasha’s back was against her car, and Tim’s body was pressed against hers.
When he stopped, he groaned and let his head fall against her shoulder. He did not let her go.
Tasha’s heart was hammering, and she could feel his doing the same. He was gasping for breath, and she could feel him searching for some way to regain control of the situation. She almost wished he wouldn’t.
It was so good. So good! So delicious to have a man take her that way. Love her that way. Want her so much! Tim’s desire was like a drug. He was in. He was in her heart, and he didn’t even seem to know!
How could he not know that she’d never do such a thing; never allow such a thing to go so far, without taking him into her heart? Was the man blind? How could a prophet so insightful, so accurate, not discern her complete capitulation?
“
Dear God.” he gasped.
Tasha waited breathlessly.
“Ask me again, Tim. Ask me one more time.”
her heart cried.
“Idiot! He’s too busy trying to control his hormones. Tell him you’ll go.”
her mind insisted.
“
No! Are you crazy? I can’t do that! I’m not ready to do that. I’ll just wait. I’ll wait to hear from him. After a few months, I might change my mind.”
And so, Tasha argued with herself, while Tim tried to get some strength back in his knees, and a grip on his flesh. When he managed that much, he pulled Tasha close and held her in his arms.
“
Sweet mother, what did you do to me?” he growled against her ear. “You know, there ought to be a law," he complained with a chuckle. He rolled his head back and closed his eyes as she wrapped her arms tightly around him and hugged him.
“
Against loving you?” she asked breathlessly.
He laughed. “Don’t tease me, Tasha. I can’t take it right now.” he warned. “I want that far too much.”
Tasha shut her mouth, and looked up at him in amazement. He didn’t believe her. He thought she was teasing him?
Tim looked into her eyes, feeling her withdraw. His brow wrinkled a bit as her face went blank, and he stopped suddenly – and wondered what she'd just said.
“
Tasha?” he asked hesitantly. He was on alert when she began to pull out of his arms. “Tasha, wait.”
She gave him a bitter smile, and unlocked her car door. “Goodbye, Tim.” she said evenly.
“
Wait a minute!” he insisted, but she was almost frantic. She froze when he wouldn’t let go of her arm, and waited. But there was already a wall of ice around her.
“
Tasha. Honey, wait.” he pleaded. “You took me by surprise. What exactly did you just say, honey? Please, for heaven’s sake. Just say it again! I’ll listen. I’m sorry.”
But Tasha had retreated too far, too fast. She couldn’t seem to stop running, now. She couldn’t trust him any further. He’d rejected her overture, and it was time to retreat.
“
Tim, I have to go. Thanks for everything.” She smiled, to soften the blow. “Goodbye.”
“
No! Tasha, no. Please wait. Son of a gun.” he growled, as she jumped in her car and locked the door.
He stood there with his hands on his hips, and watched her slip away from him. She did it, post haste. He shook his head slowly at her disappearing tail lights, and bit the insides of his cheeks in frustration. Bad words were lurking there, waiting for an invitation to spill.
Tim didn’t allow them any opportunity. He cleared his brain and looked up to heaven. “Did she say she loved me?” he asked. “Or did she say there ought to be a law against loving me? Is there a difference? Did she mean it? Or did she just get scared and run? Was she teasing me, or did she get offended because I thought she was? Did she mean it?” he grilled the angels insistently. “She had to have! She wouldn't tease about something like that.”
Finally, he let his hands fall against his sides with a frustrated slap, and wandered back upstairs, to his room. He fell on his bed with a groan, and tried to piece together what had just happened.
In the end, the only conclusion he could reach was that he’d botched it. Again.
He smiled grimly as he thought of an idea. He picked up the phone and called Lucinda. He grinned as she answered. “Hey, Lucinda. This is Tim Rain. I’m sorry to call so late, but I wanted to talk to you before Tasha gets there. I have a really big favor to ask.”
“
What is that, Mr. Timothy?” Lucinda asked eagerly.
“
Well; you know I’ve gotten kind of fond of you all. Would you be willing to send me away with a picture or two? I’d love to have a picture of you and Tasha and the kids, if you find any to spare. I’ll be praying for you, and I love to have pictures to look at when I pray.”
“
Oh! I would be delighted, Mr. Tim!” Lucinda agreed. She was touched that he cared so much.
“
Thanks, Lucinda. I’ll stop by to say goodbye tomorrow on my way to the airport. You take good care of Tasha for me, and I’ll be by to see you when I come through here again. All right?”
“
Oh, yes, Mr. Tim. Thank you so much!”
Tim gave her his office address, and said goodnight.
He shook his head as he looked at the clock. It was going to be one
long
night.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Tim couldn’t help himself. He bought white roses and took them to her on his way to the airport the next day, at noon. Reuben was taking the same flight, so they were sharing a taxi. He ribbed Tim unmercifully about the flowers and the girl, but Tim wasn't perturbed by it.
Lucinda answered the door, and joyfully let him in. She slipped off to get him some pictures, and he stuffed them in his Bible, while Lucinda went to get Tasha.
She came down the stairs slowly. Her bangs were partly covering one eye, and she looked adorable and sexy. He smiled, and shook his head. She always knew how to twist his guts, and drive him to his knees.
When she stopped and looked up at him, he could smell her cologne, the products she used in her hair, her sweet body. It almost hurt.
“
Hey.” he said quietly. She didn’t respond, other than to blink and patiently wait for him to go on.
“
I, um … sense that while I was trying to refrain from ravishing you on the garage floor last night, you were possibly saying something that I desperately wanted to hear. I’m sorry that I didn't catch on immediately. I came to see if you’d consider picking up the conversation.”
She looked away, and pressed her lips together more tightly.
He placed the roses in her arms, and stepped closer. “I’m sorry. Please?” he asked gently.
She seemed frozen, so he went on.
“
Let’s see. I was asking you to marry me, at least come to Jackson, and you were saying something about how you might love me, and you kissed me.”
“
That was a goodbye kiss, if you will think through the testosterone poisoning.” she interrupted coldly. She raised cool eyes to find him wounded, but he tried to appear amused.
“
Well, it didn’t feel like goodbye.” he argued lightly. “If I’d not had the blood thrashing in my ears, I think I'd have heard you saying 'yes'. But somehow, things got out of hand again. Tasha, will you please reconsider? Let's back up, and talk about it again. Please?”
She looked at him evenly. “No. I’m sorry.”
Tim looked shattered. Something just died in his eyes, as he digested her answer. He looked away, and then met her gaze frankly.
“
Okay.” he said quietly. He looked so hurt, so defeated, that Tasha felt fearful and ashamed.
“
Tim, I need time. I can’t afford to be impetuous.”
“
What are you saying, then?” he asked softly.
She sighed. “I don’t know. Go do some things for awhile, I guess, and we’ll see what happens.”
“
Okay.” he agreed listlessly. “Take care.” He turned and walked down the steps without looking at her again.
Tasha opened her mouth and reached after him, but she didn’t know what to say. “Call me … sometime.” she said lamely.
Tim looked up to acknowledge her words, and nodded. He gave her a long, tortured look, before he climbed into his cab. He was not a happy man.
Timothy’s image wouldn’t die in Tasha’s heart. He’d really gotten a hold on her, and she couldn’t shake him. She’d wake up in the morning with a vision of him walking down her front entryway again, just the way he had that last morning. She could even see the way his Levi’s hugged his hips and the way his shoulders filled out his suit coat. She picked up his business card at least twenty times a day, and just stared at it.
When she’d ski, she could envision him ahead of her on the slope, going hard and fast, his athletic body amazing her. When she went to bed at night, she could almost feel his arms closing around her, his lips on her brow. When she’d close her eyes, she’d see him smiling that handsome, sweet, wicked smile at her. It was driving her absolutely crazy.
Finally, he called, two weeks after the end of the conference. Tasha happened to pick up the phone; and she froze when he responded to her answer.
“
Hey, Tasha. It’s Tim.” he said quietly.
Tasha sat down on a chair, fast. “Timothy? Where are you?”
He chuckled. “I’m stretched out on a lounger looking at Lake Powell, and wishing you were here. I miss you.” he said lightly.
“
Really? Well, thanks.” she responded with light sarcasm.
He just laughed.
“
What are you doing at Lake Powell?”
“
Well, I’ve been doing a bit on the Navajo reservations, and I have a friend who lives on the lake. He invited me to stay and relax for a few days. I couldn’t resist. There’s just something about a dock and motor boats and chaise lounges and fishing poles and water skis, that make you want to say 'yes'.”
Tasha smiled. “I can well imagine.” she admitted. “So where are you headed next?”
He sighed. “I’ll be in Phoenix next week, and Santa Fe the week after. After that, I don’t know. There are quite a number of offers pending, right now. I am really not sure what I need to be doing, just yet. That’s one of the reasons I’m here. I think I’d better slow down, and try to find out what the boss has in mind.”
“
Sounds like wisdom.” she admitted.
Tim tried to gauge her voice. She sounded very relaxed. “Hey, honey. You know, I felt pretty bad about the way I left you.” he said gently.
She tightened up. “Yes. I did, too.” she admitted.
“
I know I threw a lot at you, all at one time.” he apologized. “Are you going to be able to forgive me for being an insensitive jerk?”
She smiled and closed her eyes. “Hey. I’m used to it.” She teased.
He chuckled. “Do you think we could back up to what you were saying about two seconds before you said goodbye to me that last night of the conference?” he asked quietly. “I think I need to listen a little more closely. I missed too much of it while trying to manage my testosterone level.”
Tears welled up in Tasha’s eyes. “I was just telling you that there ought to be a law protecting poor, defenseless women from smooth operators like you.” she lied.