Read A Passionate Discovery (Self-Discovery Series) Online
Authors: T Brooke
She would
never have bought anything so revealing if Scarlett hadn't insisted that it was
perfect, and paid for it on her father's credit card before she could protest,
and she felt more than a little self-conscious with so much of her body on
display.
"Stop
tugging at it, you'll damage the material," Scarlett told her friend.
"You are drop dead gorgeous, and Jason is going to die when he sees you
tonight. Just relax." She had always thought that Carla reminded her of a
baby doll, with her full lips and angelic features, but that look was
completely altered by the dress. Now she looked more like a siren pixie with
her expressive hazel eyes and her lower lip trembling in nervous anticipation.
She had a perfect figure, with softly rounded thighs and a small waist and Scarlett
had to admit she was more than a little turned on. "Sweetie, you look
fucking hot."
Carla
blushed at her friend's remark. "I do not," she protested, turning
her face away from the strange heated look in Scarlett's eyes.
"If
you weren't my best friend I'd show you just how damn hot you look." Scarlett
winked and blew a kiss as her friend looked at her in shock, before crossing to
the closet to take out a pair of strappy five inch heels.
Trying not
to think too much about the butterflies Scarlett's words set to flight in her
stomach Carla attempted to lighten the mood. "I'll probably bust my ass
before I make it up the stairs tonight."
Not
wanting to make her friend anymore uncomfortable than she already was, Scarlett
pushed aside the thoughts of what she'd like to do with her friend. "You
are not going to bust your ass, now slide these on and let's get your makeup
sorted."
Twenty
minutes later Carla found herself looking at a stranger in the mirror. The
makeup Scarlett had altered her features with wasn't overly done, it was just
the right tone, and in Carla's opinion was perfect, there was no other way she
could describe it.
Her lips
were outlined in a deep chocolate and filled with a soft shimmering brown,
which made them appear fuller. Scarlett had also applied a charcoal color to
her eyes and outlined them perfectly, making them stand out. Her cheeks were
dusted with a soft peach color, which she hoped would help cover the blush that
didn't seem to want to leave her face.
After a
moment, during which she admired her handiwork, Scarlett spoke up. "Okay,
grab your purse; it's time to get you to the mansion." She was a little
jealous that Jason was going to initiate her best friend into their world, but
she wasn't about to bring that up just then.
"You're
taking me?" Carla was surprised; she'd assumed that she would be driving
herself.
"Of
course. I know Jason, and I trust him, but you never meet a new Dom without a
safety net." Grabbing her purse she ushered Carla out the door.
Carla
couldn't bring herself to talk during the drive; her nerves were strung too
tight for conversation. She was grateful that Scarlett seemed to understand
that and kept her eyes on the road, not bothering to try and draw her friend
out. When they pulled into the mansion's drive Carla felt her stomach tense in
fear once again. "I don't know if I can do this." She turned haunted
eyes to her friend as the car came to a stop.
"You
can do this, hon, just remember, your cell phone is in your purse. Call me in
one hour to tell me you're okay, understand, and if you have any problems call
me straightaway and I'll be right there." Scarlett leaned over to kiss her
friend on the cheek. "Now get your ass in there and talk to the man."
Pulling back she smiled as Carla opened the door and got out.
Carla felt
as though she was going to be sick, her stomach did somersaults as she shut the
door with a feeble nod and forced herself to walk up the stairs.
"Don't
forget to call me in an hour," Scarlett called after her. "If you
don't I'll be here with Daniel, pounding down the door."
Ringing
the doorbell she turned back to her friend. "I will," she called in
return, waving timidly. She had never been so nervous or excited in her life.
CHAPTER FOUR
The door
was answered by the same butler who had opened it on her previous visit and Carla
smiled nervously, feeling like her mouth was filled with cotton. Tugging at her
dress she entered the mansion as the butler held the door open.
She was
glad he didn't speak to her; at that moment she was sure she couldn’t have
answered him if her life depended on it. She had to fight the urge to turn and
dart back through the door before it closed; an urge which only faded when she
heard the click of the door catch and realized it was too late for her to
leave.
Since she
couldn't leave, without making a total fool of herself, she followed the butler
as he led her up a long flight of stairs. They didn't stop until they reached Jason's
study, where the butler held open the door for her to enter.
Jason
stood as Carla entered, his eyes widening at the delectable sight she made,
standing there trembling like a virgin sacrifice, which he thought was a good
description for her. "That will be all, Franklin." He dismissed the
servant, his eyes on the angelic creature he hoped would soon be under his
command.
He waited
until his butler had shut the door, leaving the two of them alone, and then he
crossed the room to take Carla's hand in his own.
Carla's
eyes raked over Jason as he approached and took her hand. She swallowed
convulsively as her gaze roamed over his wide chest and strong arms, which were
encased in a white dress shirt. He wore dark gray slacks and looked as if he'd
just taken his tie off following a business meeting. She couldn't help thinking
he looked even more handsome than he had the night before.
When her
eyes finally met his she blushed deeply as she felt herself drawn into the dark
blue depths, which contained an element of humor, as if he found something
funny.
The feel
of his large hands swallowing her smaller ones felt strangely comforting, and
her trembling subsided slightly.
"I'm
glad you decided to meet with me tonight, Carla." Jason smiled as he ran
his thumb over the soft silkiness of her hand. He felt the minor tremors that
were running through her and smiled, trying to put at ease. The look of fear
and uncertainty in her hazel eyes excited him and had him aching to walk her
straight down to his dungeon, but he knew he needed to calm her down just then.
"T-thank
y-you," she whispered, not sure what she was supposed to say to him, her
throat felt so parched she was surprised she could say anything at all.
He smiled
at her nervousness and led her over to the small leather couch, pulling her
down to sit with him once they got there. He kept hold of her hand the whole
time, fearing that if he let go she would turn and bolt. "Did you and Scarlett
find time to talk about things today?"
Flushing
so deeply she was sure it would be visible through her makeup Carla nodded. She
was totally out of her element and knew it; she imagined he could hear her
heart, so loud did it seem to be beating in her chest. Doing her best not to
fidget she fought the urge to get up and pace, or run.
"Do
you remember what I told you last night, Carla? I need you to speak to me, and
to look at me when you do so." His voice was a step short of the
commanding tone he would normally have used with a submissive, Carla had yet to
agree to such a position and he realized he needed to moderate himself until
she did so to avoid scaring her off.
Carla
lifted her eyes to his. "D-do you think I c-could get a glass of
w-water?" she asked, thinking that if she wanted to actually talk to him
she needed to do something about her dry mouth, which was getting worse by the
second.
He
chuckled softly at her request, let go of her hands, and stood. "I think I
might be able to manage that. Wait here and I'll be right back." He
considered summoning a servant to fetch the water, but knew instinctively that Carla
needed some time to get herself under control so he left her alone, making his
way down to the kitchen.
Filling a
glass with ice he pulled a bottle of water from the refrigerator. He thought
about offering her something stronger, since it was apparent she needed it, but
he wanted her clear-headed when they began their discussion. He made it a
policy not to mix alcohol with business, whether it was business business or
personal business, doing so invariably led to bad decisions, and he didn't want
Carla to regret anything she might agree to.
As he
walked back upstairs to his study with the glass and bottle of water he found
himself uncertain how to start the discussion that was to take place; he hadn't
experienced such uncertainty before and found himself wondering at the cause of
it.
When Jason
had left the room Carla stood and began pacing the study, trying to calm her
nerves. She told herself that it was just a meeting, and she shouldn't freak
out, part of her degree course had involved mock meetings to get her used to
such experiences, but part of her wondered if he was going to want to have sex
with her when the meeting was over and she worried about that. She wasn't sure
she was ready for that, even though she knew sex was a large part of what she
was there for.
In
opposition to the thought that he would want to have sex with her when the
meeting was over was the thought that he wouldn't. Carla wasn't sure which
possibility was worse.
She had no
idea what was going to happen, either during the meeting or after it, and not
knowing was making her a nervous wreck.
"Are you
going to touch me tonight?" Carla blurted the question the moment Jason
re-entered the study, her hand flew to her mouth the instant the words were
out, shocked that she had voiced what was on her mind.
He chuckled
deeply and held out the glass, which he filled from the bottle when she took it
from him. "I'm glad you found your voice, Sweetheart." He smiled as
she took the drink and took a long sip. "Why don't we sit and talk about
it." He had expected to have to coax her into opening up; it made things
much easier having her blurt out such a question.
Carla took
another sip of water, surprised that she was able to hold the glass without
dropping it, her hands were shaking that badly. Although she was embarrassed at
having blurted the question, now it was out in the open she felt less nervous.
"Sorry," she whispered as she returned to the couch and sat again.
He joined
her, resting his long arm on the back of the couch behind her. "Don't be
sorry. Tonight I want you to be completely open with me, I want you to ask and
say anything that comes into your mind. This is why we're here, to discuss
things and to negotiate." He was pleased to see that she kept her eyes on
him as he spoke and didn't try to look away. "To answer your question, no,
I am not going to touch you tonight, unless you ask me to that is."
Carla's
eyes widened at his words, she hadn't expected him to give her a choice.
"I'm confused." She felt a little more confident and it showed in her
voice, which didn't waver as it had when she asked him about being touched.
"What
are you confused about?" Jason smiled indulgently, happy to let her lead
the conversation for the time being.
"I
thought you would be in control of what we did." She took another quick
sip of water, feeling her tongue loosen and her confidence rise as the water
moistened her mouth.
"If
you accept my terms tonight then yes, I will be in control; I will control you
completely." His tone deepened, while he wanted her to be comfortable, he
didn't want to give her false impressions about who would be in charge.
The change
of inflection his voice made her hands tremble and she almost dropped the
glass. He took it from her with a smile of reassurance and she felt her heart
skip a beat before picking up pace until it was pounding in her chest like a
bass drum. She was surprised he didn't seem to hear it.
Lowering
her eyes she tried to hide the longing he inspired in her.
"Look
at me, Carla." His voice was demanding and his long fingers went to her
chin, raising her face up until her eyes met his again. "I need to be able
to see your face to know what you're feeling, it's very important that you
understand this."
Not
letting go of her chin, or taking his eyes from her, Jason took the glass from
her and set it down on the table beside him. "We need to talk about what
you hope to get out of this. Tell me what it is you truly want." The
desire he could see in her gaze pleased him and he moved his fingers from under
her to chin to stroke them softly across her cheek.
The touch
of his fingers sent shivers of desire through her, and for a moment she found
herself unable to think, let alone speak. "I think I want you," she
whispered finally, when she regained her voice, careful not to drop her gaze
from his.
He
chuckled softly at her admission. "You only think you want me?" he
asked as her cheeks reddened. He felt a longing to lean over and kiss her but
forced himself to resist, it wasn't the time for that.
"Th-that's
not what I meant, I mean yes I want…" Her face burned crimson and she grew
flustered, not sure how to explain to him what it was she had meant.
"I'm
glad you want me, Carla, I want you as well, but we are here to figure out what
you are willing to allow me to do to you."
Her eyes
widened slightly and she stuttered, "Wh-what do you w-want to do to
m-me?" she asked, feeling a little overwhelmed again.
"Sweetheart,
the things I want to do to you would probably send you running for the door.
But I can be a patient man, when I choose to be." He smiled, enjoying the
way her eyes widened even more. "I need to know what things you aren't
willing to try."
"I
honestly don't know," she told him, embarrassed to admit that she didn't
know enough about sex to be able to tell him what she wasn't willing to try.
"You
have no idea how enticing it is to think about you letting me do whatever I
want to you, but you have me in a quandary here. I have to admit that this is
uncharted territory for me; I've never taken a virgin before, and I've
certainly never introduced one to this lifestyle." The thought was beyond
exciting for him, but it also worried him.
"So
you don't want me?" Despite his stricture against doing so she lowered her
eyes, not wanting him to see her cry; her disappointment had her on the verge
of tears and she wasn't sure she was going to be able to hold them back.
"Sweetheart,
you have no idea how much I want you." He chuckled as her eyes filled with
hope. "The trouble is, I don't know how to do this without crossing
boundaries you might not know you have." Rising to his feet he looked down
on her contemplatively.
Carla
looked up at him, wishing she had some wise words to offer him; she couldn't
begin to imagine what she could say however. As he paced the room, lost in
thought, and seemingly unaware of her continued presence, she took the opportunity
to really look at him.
It was
apparent he was a fitness nut; even dressed in his business suit she could tell
there wasn't an ounce of fat on him. When he turned away from her she was
gifted with a view of his ass and she blushed at the thought that crossed her
mind. She was shocked to find herself thinking that his ass was to die for, she
didn’t normally think like that.
The golden
tint of his skin, which contrasted with the brilliant white of his shirt, told
her he enjoyed being outdoors. After that her eyes moved up to his face; his
profile was one a sculpture would love, his features a strong example of
masculine beauty. Everything about him called to her on a level that left her
aching.
After
several minutes Jason stopped his pacing and turned to face Carla, his cock
twitched at the look of innocent desire on her face. "Okay, this is how
this is going to work if you decide to go through with this." He was
having a hard time concentrating as her heated gaze roamed over him in
fascination. "Since you don't yet know what you enjoy, and we'll be
starting from ground zero, so to speak, I am going to suggest we don't impose
any limits to begin with. Instead we will establish safe words for you to use
until we discover where your comfort zone is."
Carla nodded,
and immediately felt a wave of fear wash over her as a dark look filled his
deep blue eyes.
"Words,
Carla, I need you to speak to me. The first thing you need to understand is
that if you don't listen when I tell you to do something, there will be consequences.
Do you understand?"
She nodded
again, but then quickly spoke, "I understand." Despite her words she
wasn't actually sure what he meant by consequences. "Okay, I don't really
understand," she admitted, feeling like a complete idiot.
Sitting on
the couch next to her, Jason directed a stern look at Carla. "What I mean
is, if you don't do as I say, I am going to punish you so you will remember not
to make the same mistake again."
Carla bit
her lip hard as she thought about what he was saying. "H-how would you
punish me." She only stuttered a little, and was proud of herself for
that, the look in his eyes was so intense she was surprised she could say
anything at all.