Authors: Kim Boykin
“Shhh,” Brooks said, towering over me. Dark eyes looking into mine.
I jerked out of his grip and pushed him away as hard as I could. “Don’t you touch me.”
“Nettie, honey—” He reached for me and I shoved him away.
“And don’t you
honey
me,” I bit out. “If I didn’t love my sister so much, I would have spit in your eye at the supper table.”
“What about me?” he asked. “Don’t you still love me because I love—”
The crack of my hand meeting his face was deafening, although no one besides Brooks and me seemed to be aware of it. I could hear Daddy and Uncle Doak laughing about something over by the shed where they’d been working on the truck, the soft clatter of Sissy finishing up the dishes in the kitchen.
“I deserved that, Nettie.” He moved toward me, but I stepped back, almost tripping on one of the hounds. “And I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry, but I don’t want this, this
wedding
. I want you. I’ve always wanted you.”
“You should have thought about that before you took Sissy’s virtue.” His head snapped back like I’d slapped him again. He was either an idiot for thinking I hadn’t known she was a virgin, or an imbecile for thinking I didn’t know everything about my own sister. “Sissy is young and impressionable and even you remarked at how she’d always
followed you around like a puppy since she was little. She may or may not have known what she was doing, but you are almost four years older than her, Brooks. You knew exactly what you were doing.”
“Please, Nettie, hear me out. I love you. I’ve always loved you.” He reached for me, but I crossed my arms over my chest. He put his hands up in surrender and looked into my eyes.
“Okay. Okay. Just hear me out,” he said. “God, if I could take back that one moment, that one time, I would. But it happened and she got pregnant and everything just spun out of control. I don’t want to marry her, I want to marry you. Now.”
My head was dizzy with his words. Throbbing. “You have lost your mind.”
“No, Nettie, we can run away together. Live anywhere you want.” He had closed the distance between us and was towering over me in a way that used to make me feel special. Safe. “I love you so much, Nettie. Please say yes.”
A cold chill slithered down my body. He’d said those exact same words the night he’d proposed to me. He mistook my trembling for weakness, but anger was rioting through my body, shaking it to the core.
“
Grow up, Brooks
,” I spat.
His brow creased like I was speaking a dead language. “What did you say to me?”
“Grow the hell up. You give my sister your name. You buck up and be the best goddamn husband and father in the world or I swear to God, I will come back to Satsuma and castrate you with a chicken’s beak.”
“But Nettie, you love me,” he choked out. “You don’t mean that.”
“Try me,” I growled, snatching up the bucket and heading back inside.
Sissy glanced up when I opened the screen door and then quickly back down at the dirty dishwater in the sink. I took my place beside her, still trembling, gutted for her but grateful she hadn’t heard a word Brooks had said to me.
Plain and simple, he didn’t deserve Sissy, but Remmy was right, the world isn’t kind to women who have babies out of wedlock. And even though every soul in town knew Sissy, things would be no better for her. She had no choice; she’d have to marry Brooks. Not to mention what Mother would do if Sissy called off the wedding. And if Brooks dumped Sissy, she’d be marked for life as the girl who got knocked up.
“Oh, Sissy,” I whispered and plunged my hand into the water to hold hers. Head still down, she looked at our clasped hands and nudged my hip ever so slightly. Her voice was barely above a whisper.
“Possum.”
T
he morning sun streamed through the lace curtains. Lurleen was beyond tired. She felt the full brunt of the trip Remmy had warned would kill her but had taken Emily’s life instead. Sister’s body was lying, hopefully in a lovely blue casket back in Biloxi, waiting for Lurleen to take her home. While Lurleen still felt the pull that always draws sisters together, even after one or maybe even both have gone to the grave, it felt right to be here with Nettie.
She’d played beautifully last night. The strains of Chopin, Strauss, Bach in the middle of an orange grove, and while Lurleen had wanted to jerk a knot in Sissy’s rear end for what she did to Nettie, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for the child. As Nettie played the piano for the whole lot of them, her sister sat next to a man who obviously did not love her; his hand clasped hers in obligation. And
the girl knew this. Why, even a stranger like Lurleen could see it was eating that poor child from the inside out.
Some rumbling in the kitchen prompted Lurleen to stir. Most likely that Helen, whom Lurleen hoped she’d put the fear of God’s ire in or at the very least, the fear of the Eldridge ire. Lurleen eased her rickety old body out of bed and dressed. So many aches and pains. She was looking forward to getting her new body. Seeing her family, and of course Emily, who was probably flirting with all the handsome angels and holding court while she waited on Lurleen to join her.
Her door opened and Nettie’s sweet face appeared. “You’re up.” She smiled.
“And surprisingly hungry,” Lurleen said, which made Nettie’s smile widen and Lurleen feel a little guilty. She’d gotten so attached to the girl. The same for Nettie, and Lurleen worried if her passing would be hard on her because she hadn’t lied to Helen or told her anything she didn’t already know. Nettie Gilbert knew how to love, how to make you feel loved. It was a gift that Brooks boy had obviously squandered, and you could see the cost on his face. It was a gift Lurleen would treasure long into eternity.
“It’s nice out this morning. Mother will serve breakfast at the outside table. There’s a bench between the roses and the gardenias, if you’d like to sit before we eat,” Nettie said. “I’m going to help out in the kitchen. Mother said Sissy’s taking the day off, I’ll talk to her after breakfast, and then we’ll be on our way.”
“That would be lovely, dear,” Lurleen said. She barely got the words out and plopped back down on the bed.
Nettie rushed to her side. “Are you all right?”
“I’m fine. This trip has taken far more from me than I’d thought it would.”
“You rest. I’ll come get you when breakfast is ready, and we’ll leave right after we eat,” Nettie said.
“Has your sister spoken to you at all?” Lurleen asked.
“Not really, she said something last night. One word. Our word. But it’s a start. Even if she doesn’t talk to me now, I know we’re going to be okay.” A sad smile crossed her lips. “You gave me that, and I’m so grateful.”
I
hurried over to my house. The kitchen was already a flurry of activity. I jumped into the familiar dance of getting a meal ready for two hungry men, two growing boys, and a handful of women. Everything was almost ready when I asked mother if I could make a phone call.
“Why, Nettie Jean, you’ve never asked to use that telephone in your life,” she said, hauling a tray of big fluffy biscuits out of the oven. “Sissy, stir that gravy. If it sticks it’ll be a mess.”
“It’s long distance.” Sissy looked up at me and then back at the pan.
“All right,” Mother said, “but don’t talk long.”
I called Remmy’s home and prayed Katie didn’t answer. While she’d given me her blessing when I’d called the office the other day, I wasn’t sure how she’d feel about my calling their home so early in the morning.
“Hello.”
“Hey, Remmy. I’m glad it’s you who answered.”
“And I’m glad it’s you too. Feels like it’s been years since we last talked.”
“Nope. Just a little over a day.”
“How’s Miss Lurleen holding up?”
“Surprisingly well. Things might be different when we get back to Biloxi and take the train home, but right now, it’s kind of like Miss Emily is still with us.”
“She probably is.” His laugh was soft and warmed me from the inside out. “She was always stubborn; if she didn’t want to go to heaven, not even God himself could make her until she was good and ready.”
“Lurleen’s really tired; that worries me.”
“That’s understandable,” he said. “So, now you’re on a first-name basis? I’ve known the sisters my whole life and have never had that honor.”
“She’s insisted. I think she believes I earned the privilege.”
“I’m sure you did. How are you doing? Did you see
him
?”
“Brooks? Yes, I saw him last night. He wanted me to run away with him,” I whispered into the phone, even though everyone was well out of earshot. “The idiot.”
“You aren’t calling me from some exotic locale, are you?” he teased.
“If you can call Satsuma exotic, then yes.”
“I can’t blame the guy for trying, but I feel sorry for your sister. Are the nuptials still on?”
“It seems so. As bad as I feel for Sissy, I can’t stay for the wedding. I won’t.”
There was a long silence. “Because you still have feelings for him?”
“Because I wouldn’t be able to stand idly by and watch that idiot marry my sister.”
“That’s a relief,” Remmy said.
“You didn’t think that I still—”
“I’m a guy, Nettie. We’re not the smartest creatures on the planet when it comes to women.”
“Until last night I didn’t realize just how stupid you all could be.”
“Never thought I’d be defending Brooks, but it’s not entirely his fault; there’s some kind of veil that goes up between your world and mine; happens when a boy hits puberty. That’s why men are clueless about the fairer sex; that’s why talking to you every day, I learn something.”
“Oh, really?” I teased. “What have you learned from just talking to me on the phone?”
“Nettie, if you don’t get off, your father will pitch a fit when the bill comes,” Mother hollered from the kitchen.
“You’d better make it snappy,” I laughed. “My mother says I have to hang up.”
“Give me your number, and I’ll call you back on my dime.”
“Quick. Tell me everything you know,” I teased, expecting one of Remmy’s patented smart remarks. “I have to go help with breakfast.”
“I know that you’re more than just a soft, beautiful creature who takes my breath away. You’re smart. So damn smart and strong. And somehow, you make a guy like me who prides himself on knowing everything actually feel good that I don’t know anything. Makes
every moment with you my next best moment. A gift to open, to discover.”
“Nettie!” Mother yelled.
“Oh, my,” I breathed into the phone. “You really know how to make a girl fall for you, Remmy Wilkes,” I echoed his words.
“I sure hope so.”
Daddy and Uncle Doak came in from the fields starved; they came into the kitchen for coffee and to wash up. The minute Daddy walked through the door, Mama gave him a tentative look and jerked her head toward Sissy. I knew that she was as concerned as I was. Sissy looked worse than she did yesterday, like the impending wedding was killing her. The worried lines on Mother’s face said she was worried for the baby, and for her own baby.
Daddy’s face was impassive. He loved Brooks, always had. They hunted and fished together all the time, especially after Brooks’s father died a few years ago. They tinkered with the cars together. Lamented over but loved Auburn football. Daddy had said on more than one occasion, if he could have picked a son out of the nursery at the hospital, it would have been Brooks, and having him as a son-in-law would be the next best thing. I guess it didn’t matter to him which daughter brought him into the family.
Mother gave Daddy another cross look for him to say something.
“You all right, Sissy?” his deep voice rumbled.
“Yeah, Daddy, I’m fine.” He looked at Mother and shrugged, his job done.
When breakfast was on the table, I went back to Nana’s to get Lurleen. She and Nana were sitting at the table, drinking coffee.
“Breakfast is ready,” I said.
When Lurleen rose, I cupped her elbow, but she asked for one of the hand-carved canes my late Grandpa Gilbert made that were sitting beside the front door. “I’ll go have a seat. You need to speak with your grandmother.”
“But you said you weren’t feeling well. Sure you don’t want me to see you to the table, Lurleen?”
“I’m well enough.” She smiled and patted my shoulder.
I saw her out the front door, watched until she reached the table, and then walked back into the kitchen.
“Sit down, Nettie.” I took the seat across from Nana, who looked as tormented as Sissy did.
“If you’re worried about Brooks and Sissy, Nana, don’t. I don’t love him. I’m not sure I ever did, and I threatened his—life if he hurt her.”
Nana looked down at her hands but not at me. “This isn’t about that. Your friend says I owe you an apology.”
“You don’t owe me anything. I’m fine, really.”
“She’s right, you know. At the very least, I owe you an apology for not speaking up when this whole mess started and then for letting your mother tell you the way she did. I know it made sense in her etiquette-obsessed mind, but it was cruel and wrong. And I owe Sissy, for letting this go as far as it has. My punishment is seeing that boy who doesn’t love her in the least by her side. Unfortunately, it’s her punishment too, but I
am
sorry, Nettie, so very sorry.”
“Sissy and I come from strong stock, Nana.” I took her withered hands in mine. “I hope she’ll be strong enough to not walk down that aisle tomorrow, but if she’s not, I hope she and Brooks will learn to love each other.”
• • •
T
hat’s a fine vehicle you have there, Miss Eldridge.” Daddy’s attempt at making breakfast conversation.
“Lurleen, please. And goodness knows the car isn’t mine.”
Daddy gave me a hard look like I’d bought something on time against his wishes. “It’s not mine either,” I said. “Lurleen and her sister, Emily, and I were traveling together when Miss Emily passed away in Biloxi. Someone loaned us the car; we have to return it after breakfast.”
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Miss—” Mother dropped the meat fork, then fumbled to pick it up, the color drained from her face. “Wait. You’re leaving? Nettie, this can’t be. You’re staying for the wedding. You just have to.”
“No, Mother, I don’t,” I said. “I didn’t come for the wedding. I came to speak with Sissy and then I’m leaving to take Lurleen and Miss Emily home to Camden.”
“It’s all right, Dorothy.” Daddy patted her hand. “The wedding will go off just fine. We’ll see Nettie in a few weeks at graduation.”
“No, you won’t.” I swallowed hard. “I took a leave of—”
“Your senses if you left school,” my father snapped.
“Well, I did take a leave of absence, and I’m glad.”
He swiped his mouth with his napkin and threw it in his plate. “You know? You women beat all. One getting knocked up. One completely crazy over some fool wedding. And
you
.” He pointed at me. “You’re the one who wanted the fancy education. If you’d stayed home and married Brooks right out of high school, none of this would have happened.”
Uncle Doak, his sons, everyone including Mother went stock-still and quiet. While we may have very well lived on top of each other between the groves, all four families had made it a point to mind their own business as much as any Gilbert can.
“I have things to say to Sissy that I won’t say in front of you all, but you should know that I’m glad I left school. At this very moment, if I had to choose between my degree or learning everything I learned from Lurleen and Miss Emily, I would throw it all away to know them. And for you to say I could have prevented this horrible wedding by marrying Brooks when I was as much of a child as Sissy is reprehensible.”
“Don’t you sass me, young lady. You’re not too old for me to turn across my knee.” Daddy jabbed his finger at me.
I stood and slapped my palms down on the ancient oak. “I’m not sassing you. I’m telling you the truth, which is something we don’t do enough of around here, but we should. Since Uncle Bill died, Aunt Opal has wanted to sell her house and move back to her family in Birmingham, but she was afraid to tell you all, afraid she’d lose you. And Griffin—”
“Hey, don’t bring me into this.” He held up both hands. “I’m fine.”
“How many times have you told me you wanted to go to college? How many times have you said you didn’t want to spend your whole life on this farm?”
“Stop it, Nettie,” Mother snapped.
“And you, Mother. How long are you going to pretend you’re happy when you’re too afraid to try to figure out what makes you happy? Because it sure as hell isn’t a bunch of rules and impeccable etiquette.”
“Sit down, Nettie, now,” Nana huffed. When I did, Lurleen gave my hand a squeeze.
“Thank you, Nana.” Mother swiped at her own tears.
“Well, she’s right, Dorothy,” Nana bit out. “And every single one of us, including me, should be ashamed of the way we treated Nettie. We’re lucky to have her, and I will be sad to see her go, but she wants her own life. How that happened, I don’t know; we didn’t raise her that way. But at the very least, she deserves to live her life the way she sees fit.”
“But your degree, Nettie.” Mother gave me a sorrowful look.
“When the time is right, Mother, I swear I’ll go back to school and finish.”
Everyone looked dumbfounded when Sissy spoke. “Will you ever come back home?”
“Of course I will.”
The rest of the breakfast went on record as being the most silent Gilbert family gathering ever. When the dishes were done, I excused myself from the kitchen and tugged Sissy out the door. We walked hand in hand in silence down into the pecan orchard to our tree, the one Daddy rescued us from when we were little, the one I’d rescued my baby sister from.
“I hope you didn’t bring me here to climb that tree, because I’ve forgotten how. And I probably shouldn’t,” she added softly.