Authors: Rosemary Smith
‘August the twenty-eighth,’ I told her. ‘We are to look for my wedding shoes while we are in Shrewsbury, if you’d care to join us.’
‘I’d be delighted,’ she replied, clapping her hands together and I thought how I’d taken to this gentle woman who was indeed the mother of my betrothed. We talked of Rowan and told Annabel when she asked that Mrs Burnet was still housekeeper.
‘Peggy Burnet is a treasure, I will be so pleased to see her and her husband, David, again. But my sons, they are the most important thing at Rowan, along with yourself, Justine.’ As we were talking, Daniel Madison walked across the foyer, he stopped in front of us.
‘Good morning, ladies. I wish you a pleasant day,’ he said with a smile on his face.
‘Please join us for dinner this evening. I’m sure my mother won’t mind,’ said Justine, looking at Annabel.
‘If it pleases you, then it pleases me,’ Annabel said with a gleam in her eye and I knew that she’d guessed, as I had that her daughter was falling for this young man.
We spent the afternoon in the opulent lounge and for a while I left them to talk of the past. I was more than relieved that things had gone so well between them. I just prayed that Kieran and Derrick would take to it kindly as well.
I guessed that Kieran would be greatly pleased to see her, but I had been unable so far to fathom Derrick out and since the incident in the dim corridor that night, I had kept my distance from him as much as possible.
We dined that evening in the gleaming dining-room with Annabel and Mr Madison. Justine looked radiant in a peach-coloured gown, the off-the-shoulder style complimented her lovely cream skin. Annabel wore a gold-coloured gown inset at the neck with lace which caused to remind me of my wedding gown. Annabel was every inch a lady and although I had never known her husband, Jacob, I hated him for what he had put this beautiful lady through.
My heart bled for her that she was obliged to leave her children because of a monster of a man, which undoubtedly he had been.
Staying in Shrewsbury two more days, we walked and dined with Justine’s mother and the charming Daniel Madison. By the time our last morning had arrived Justine confessed that she was in love with him.
‘Please will you allow me to ask him to your wedding, for if I don’t see him again I will die!’ she said, and how could I refuse such an urgent request. I was so happy for her.
We had spent a happy afternoon at a department store, I’d chosen petticoats, nightdresses and undergarments as there had been no time to spend sewing as we had planned.
‘Look at this,’ said Justine as we passed briefly through the men’s department. I looked at what she’d spotted. It was a man’s embroidered waistcoat, the white flowers embroidered on grey silk was perfect and with much frivolity, I purchased it for Kieran.
The time came for us to leave, Justine was practically distraught at leaving her mother for fear she may not see her again, but I encouraged her saying that all would be well, which I prayed it was. It had been a most fruitful journey. Justine had found her mother and an attentive beau who had agreed to attend our wedding.
As we sat in the carriage, our parcels around us, I was elated and so looking forward to seeing Kieran and Rowan, I could not have known what menace was to befall me before my wedding day.
Justine and I arrived back at Rowan Castle, exhausted. We chatted all the way back about Annabel and Daniel Madison. Kieran’s sister seemed like a different person from the one who had left Rowan Castle three days ago, and I was so pleased to think there would be no more sleepless nights spent sobbing in Annabel’s room.
Kieran came across to greet us as we stepped into the hallway. ‘Sister, Barbara,’ he began. ‘I trust it was a good journey and that you fared well,’ he said, looking at the parcels which were being brought into the hall by David.
‘We have had a splendid time, haven’t we, Barbara?’ enthused Justine. ‘But we are tired,’ she said, laughing, and I knew that Kieran must see a difference in his sister’s manner and it was to turn out that he had, for he said to me when we were alone later.
‘Justine seems happy. What manna from heaven has fallen to make her such?’ he asked with some amusement.
We sat on the two settles in the drawing room and I thought back to the Duchess Hotel. Justine and I had agreed for me to tell Kieran about Mr Madison, but I was to wait for Justine to tell her brother about their mother.
‘She has met a beau,’ I told Kieran simply.
‘Has she indeed. I never imagined that my sister would fall in love, but I guess she has?’ he asked me.
‘It would seem she has, Sir. He is a nice young man who lives not far away and we have invited him to our wedding,’ I told him.
‘Have you indeed,’ Kieran replied light-heartedly. ‘Well, I shall look forward to meeting this fellow, whoever he may be.’ As he spoke, Justine entered the room.
‘I have something to tell you also,’ she said awkwardly.
‘Then I shall go and organise some coffee while you talk to each other,’ I said tactfully, noticing Justine held the letter in her hand.
As I made my way across the hall to the kitchens, Kerensa stopped me. ‘So you are back. My prayers have not been answered then,’ was all she said before making her way up the staircase.
Later that evening while I was showing Megan the purchases I had made in Shrewsbury, Justine came in to tell me that all had gone well with Kieran as I suspected it might, for I knew that Kieran loved his mother as much as Justine.
‘And I am to send word to her to come and join us for a few days,’ said Justine excitedly. Megan had listened without conscious thought to our conversation.
‘Is the first mistress coming back?’ she asked wide-eyed. ‘Mrs Burnet will be well pleased as she always speaks of her with affection.’ At her words, I told Megan not to mention it to anyone, far better I thought that Justine and her siblings told the household staff in their own way.
A few days later I made the decision to visit the waterfall while Kieran was on estate business. I was asking Mrs Burnet who could accompany me when Kerensa crossed the hall.
‘I will go with you,’ she said sweetly, and I accepted her offer with little thought to the consequences, except to think momentarily that the lovely young woman had stated that she hated Rowan Falls.
So we set off in the pony and trap which Kerensa steered like someone possessed. Thankfully we came safely to a halt where Kieran and I had stopped on my first visit. As we stepped down from the trap, I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance and could see that the skies were rapidly darkening.
‘Maybe we should return,’ I said.
‘The storm is far away for the moment,’ Kerensa replied just as I saw a flash of lightning in the distance and another rumble of thunder came ever nearer than before. I suddenly felt afraid and was hesitant about walking to the waterfall, but Kerensa had already started walking.
As I looked at her going on ahead of me, I thought how she was not dressed for this visit at all. Her blue silk dress with a cloak to match moved as one with her. Everything about her was beautiful, from the way she walked to her perfect features. I followed on in my heavy cornflower blue dress, pulling my shawl tighter around me as I followed her, for the sun had disappeared and I felt cold.
The falls still thundered on their way down the gorge, and the water frothed on to the boulders below, hissing like a cauldron. A few drops of rain started to fall and above the roar of the water I heard another clap of thunder. I caught hold of Kerensa’s arm as she looked at the swirling mass of water below and then I stepped back, feeling suddenly dizzy just as the rain started to fall heavier and lightning lit the skies above us.
Kerensa had not heard my plea to return above the thundering sound of the water, and then suddenly without warning, she caught hold of my arm, pushing me to my knees and all I could see were the huge boulders below with the water angrily raging over them.
I managed to get to my feet, but stumbled and fell to my knees once more, with Kerensa holding tightly to my arm. She screamed some words in my ear.
‘You must go like Annabel, for he is mine!’ I looked up at her, her face ugly with hatred. Our clothes were getting damp and I shivered more from fright than cold as the thunderstorm raged above us and the rain now fell heavier.
I struggled to rise to my feet but she was strong and was pushing my face ever nearer the edge. Then without warning she dragged me to my feet. I could not fight her for I felt weak and we were both drenched from the rain, our clothes and hair sodden with water.
I looked at her for a brief moment, there was no beauty or pity there now, I knew that her intent was to push me to my death below. Silently I prayed and thought of Kieran. It all happened in seconds, but suddenly Kerensa was pulled from me and to my relief I could see Kieran’s handsome face and as he gathered me in his arms I fell into unconsciousness.
When I awoke again I could see that I was in the master bedroom lying between crisp white sheets, candlelight flickered on the walls as did the firelight and I could make out a figure sitting by the bed, it was Mrs Burnet.
‘Thank you, Lord,’ she said, more to herself than to me, ‘I’ll fetch the master and a nice hot mug of sweetened milk for you, Miss.’
I couldn’t speak for I felt weak and the horror of what had happened to me came to mind and although I was warm and safe I shuddered at the thought of how I so nearly came to my end as poor Annabel had done.
Kieran arrived with Justine not many minutes later. They told me Kerensa had been told the circumstances of her birth and had sadly become deranged, they had taken her to stay with their governess, Miss Hewitt for the time being, a kindly lady who had known the four of them from childhood, with the hope that in time her condition would improve.
I had agreed with some reluctance not to bring charges against her. I couldn’t say that I was sorry she had gone from Rowan. Not only had she tried to murder me by daring to try and push me in the swollen river, but she had been unkind since my arrival at Rowan Castle.
Although at the same time feeling some pity for her, for it must be hard to love someone as Kerensa loved Kieran and see them with someone else, causing the object of your affection to appear out of reach. But Kerensa knew now that she was Kieran’s
half-sister and hopefully would in time let it go.
Kieran came to see me every few hours, as did his mother, Annabel, who had arrived back at Rowan. As Kieran and his mother sat by my bed, I was delighted to see how well they were getting on. My betrothed looked somehow different with his mother at his side.
They were both relaxed and happy, and on one occasion Kieran took hold of my hand, ‘We had buried Annabel,’ he told me gently, ‘I am pleased really that you were indisposed.’
‘I would have coped with it,’ I answered, ‘for she has done me no harm.’
‘The fact remains that I should not have considered marrying you so soon. Please say you forgive me,’ he pleaded in earnest.
‘I forgive you your folly,’ I assured him, ‘and I am pleased Annabel is finally at rest.’
‘Thank you, dear heart,’ Kieran replied lifting my hand to his lips, ‘I truly love you.’
‘And I you,’ I told him softly.
I got stronger and one day felt able to share a family celebration for the first Annabel’s return to Rowan, which gave me the chance to wear my lovely turquoise gown. As I stepped into the drawing room, the silk moving with me I had eyes for no-one but my betrothed and he for me.
Derrick had been quite amenable about his mother’s return, but being the youngest he barely remembered Annabel so didn’t have the love for her that Kieran and Justine had. Everything seemed to be falling into place nicely. We spent a lovely summer at Rowan, Justine and Daniel became engaged in July.
Kieran and I spent many hours sat on a bench in the rose garden, the heady scent of the blooms surrounding us. We talked of many things, the second Annabel included, and a few days before our wedding we walked to her grave and laid a single white rose on the soft mound of earth. Neither of us spoke, but we both knew Annabel’s death had been a tragic accident and Kieran genuinely repented for the error of his ways.
A week before our wedding date, Justine and I visited Mrs Harding to be fitted for our gowns. We both sat in Mrs Harding’s fitting room full of anticipation while the dressmaker and Polly fetched the gowns.
‘Here you are, Miss,’ said Mrs Harding as she returned. I looked at the white silk and lace creation which she held over her arms and could have burst into tears.
After removing my pale yellow gown and standing in my petticoats Polly slipped the gown over my head, it fell shimmering to the floor. While Polly did up the hooks and eyes I thought once more how lucky I was, indeed, lucky to be alive I mused.
Looking in the mirror at my reflection I thought back to the grim day I had first wed Kieran in my poplin skirts, now looking at myself, this dress was all I had ever imagined.
‘Thank you so much!’ I said to the dressmaker and Polly, wishing to hug them both, but knowing it would not be seemly to do so.
The twenty-eighth of August arrived and the sun shone in a clear blue sky, the boughs of the trees were laden with leaves and everything looked so different to the snow-covered scene I had witnessed on my arrival at Rowan Castle.
Megan proudly helped me prepare for my wedding, she did my hair in a knot at the back of my head which the orange blossom headdress fitted over perfectly and deftly Megan fixed my veil to it, drawing the front of the veil over my face.
Annabel had brought me a spray of orange blossom and lily-of-the-valley to carry, my wedding slippers fitted perfectly and at last I was ready. Derrick was to accompany me down the aisle, he looked handsome in his black frock coat and as the doors of the chapel were opened for us he said, ‘You look beautiful, would that I were the bridegroom.’ And he squeezed my hand smiling at me and I realised at that moment that he was, indeed, harmless enough.
I had a fleeting thought of Kerensa as Derrick and I stood together waiting to walk down the aisle. I’d learnt from Kieran that Hannah Templeton had left her daughter a vast fortune, and I hoped that one day in the future it would help Kerensa get her life on the right path. But today was for Kieran and I, whatever else happened, we had both agreed to put the bad things behind us.
In the congregation I could see Peggy Burnet, her David and the household staff dressed in their Sunday best. Annabel Alexander stood proudly by her son with Daniel Madison next to her, who looked back at Justine as she walked behind us dressed in pink and white. And then I saw Clarissa’s face smiling at me. Dear Clarissa, my joy was now complete, and I knew this must have been Kieran’s doing.
The sun streamed through the stained-glass window spilling a multicoloured light on the floor before us, and as we walked, my handsome bridegroom wearing the embroidered waistcoat I’d brought him, smiled at me watching my progress towards him and I felt serene and happy at last. The skirts of my lovely dress brushing the floor with each step, at last it was as I’d dreamt, love, happiness and white lace.