A Surrendered Heart (25 page)

Read A Surrendered Heart Online

Authors: Tracie Peterson

Tags: #FIC042030

Amanda clutched his arm. “No, please. You’ll only make everything worse. He means to harm . . .” She fell silent. “There truly is no means of escape for me. I’ve resigned myself to a future as his wife. Ellert has been clear—my life will be lived according to his dictates.” She released her hold on his sleeve and looked deeply into his eyes. “You must not continue these attempts to save me from Ellert, but please remember that no matter what happens, I will always love you. That must be enough.”

“Until you are his wife, I will not accept this arrangement your father has made. Somehow, we must find a way.” He leaned forward to kiss her, but she took a backward step.

“I can’t . . .” she whispered.

Blake turned on his heel and trudged across the room with the weight of defeat hanging over him like a shroud. He hoped that Quincy had met with greater success than he had. Fanny was sitting outside the door at her self-appointed post. She smiled up at him as he offered his hand to pull her to her feet.

“You don’t appear very happy,” she whispered. “Didn’t your talk go well?”

“She has resigned herself to the marriage.” He shook his head. “She seems to have no will to fight against it. Even though she’s asked me to make no further attempt to save her from the marriage, I refuse to give up. Perhaps you can talk some sense into her.”

Fanny glanced toward the room. “Wait here and give me a few minutes. Then we’ll return to the boathouse.”

Blake took up Fanny’s position outside the door, and from his vantage point he watched Jonas and Quincy walk through the front foyer and exit the house. He glanced at the bedroom door. Fanny might be in there for some time. His curiosity attacked him with an intensity that wouldn’t be stilled. He hadn’t heard anyone downstairs since the men departed. With one final glance at the bedroom door, he walked down the front steps.

Ellert stared at the library ceiling while he finished his cigar. He’d felt a sense of relief when Jonas and Quincy left. Let the two of them wander around their island and commiserate over their misfortune and wallow in their sorrow. The thought gave him great pleasure. In fact, the entire meeting had provided a great deal of entertainment. Simply watching Jonas go pale at Quincy’s suggestion that they employ the help of old friends had been quite amusing. Jonas couldn’t bear falling into social obscurity. He knew it would forever damage any hopes for business dealings—at least lucrative ones.

Ellert chuckled. In time Jonas would come to realize that his position as a reigning leader of Rochester had come to an end. He could only imagine what Quincy and Jonas would do and say now that they were alone. Quincy was likely quoting Scripture to Jonas. Ellert grinned. Perhaps Jonas and his pretentious wife could take up residence in Quincy’s Home for the Friendless when all was said and done. He chuckled at the idea.

With the same harshness that permeated his thoughts, Ellert stubbed out his cigar and blew one final puff of smoke into the room. The air had grown warm and dank. He looked out the far windows. A bank of clouds had turned dark and appeared to be rolling in toward the island. The breeze would surely prove cooler outdoors. He pushed himself up from the chair and ambled toward the library door. He’d made his way only a short distance down the hallway when he heard muffled footfalls on the carpeted stairs. He stopped midstep.
Blake Carstead!

With his fingers curled into his palms, he formed two tight fists and remained motionless until Blake disappeared into the darkness. Only then did he take four long strides and look up toward the second-floor balcony. Amanda stood looking down at the front door. Anger welled in his chest until he thought it might explode. No one had mentioned Blake had come to the island. When and how had he gotten here?
Quincy
. He must have arrived on the boat with Quincy. He clenched his jaw. The entire time the three of them had been meeting in the library, Blake had been upstairs dallying with Amanda. How
dare
he? How dare
she
?

A fire raged in Ellert’s belly. “That young man will pay for this. Something must happen to him—and soon,” he hissed from between clenched teeth.

23

Friday, August 4, 1899

Victoria sat at her dressing table pulling the brush through her hair, the gray streaks more noticeable with each passing day—or so she thought. She lifted the top layer of hair and examined the strands that lay beneath and then leaned closer to the mirror. The roots were definitely gray. She’d be completely gray before long. And little wonder. Few women would have survived a marriage to Jonas without turning completely gray long ago. Unfortunately, the mere thought of her husband had seemed all that was necessary to propel him into their bedroom.

He crossed the room and dropped into one of the upholstered chairs that flanked the double door leading from their bedroom to the upper veranda. While Victoria continued to brush her hair, he sighed and leaned back to rest his head against the soft upholstery. “This has been a most trying day.”

Victoria remained silent.

A few moments later, he said, “There was something or someone to create disharmony at every turn.”

If Jonas expected her pity and comfort, he would be sadly mistaken. She stared at her own reflection and continued her ministrations. She could feel his stare boring through her until she finally turned to meet his annoyed look in the mirror. Yet she said nothing. Her piercing look should be enough to speak volumes.

“I will not tolerate this silent treatment of yours any longer, Victoria. I had no choice but to agree to Ellert Jackson’s terms.” He hunched forward in his chair and continued to stare at her in the mirror. “That’s what this is about, isn’t it? I wouldn’t want to misinterpret what has caused your ire.”

Victoria gathered her dressing gown in one hand and twisted around on the chair. She gave a slight nod before turning back to the mirror to braid her faded hair.

“Nothing will be resolved between us if you refuse to speak to me.”

The single braid swung forward when she lurched from the chair and bent toward him, anger flashing in her eyes. “Nothing was resolved when we
were
speaking. I have told you over and over again that I do not want my daughter relegated to a loveless marriage. She is precious to me—she deserves more, even if you don’t think so. I’ve come to realize that none of us means as much to you as your bank account.”

“Don’t you judge me, Victoria. When there is no money to purchase new gowns or pay servants’ wages, you’ll think the money every bit as important as I do. Worse still, when society turns its back on you and all the doors close to those glorious homes you frequent, you’ll certainly begin to understand. I have made it abundantly clear that I had no other choice. Everyone else has accepted the arrangement. Even Amanda has come to terms with the wedding. I don’t know why you can’t do the same.”

Victoria seized her brush from the dressing table and pointed it at her husband. “
Why
? I’ll tell you why, Jonas. Ellert is a deceptive man who will do harm to our daughter, and yet you insist that she marry him. I was momentarily charmed by him, but after spending time with him here on the island, it’s become apparent that he’s far more than he pretends to be. You found a means to settle your mistakes, and Amanda is the one who will suffer. You made the wrong choices, yet you expect someone else to pay the price.” No doubt she’d overstepped proper boundaries, for Jonas appeared stunned into silence.

Soon, however, he regained his former pomp. “What happened to my prim and proper wife who vowed to obey her husband?”

“I believe she went the way of her husband, who vowed to love and honor his wife and family.” The fact that Jonas continued to deflect all wrongdoing from himself only fueled Victoria’s anger. She’d not sit back and watch Amanda’s life destroyed without a fight. “What would your father think of what you are doing?” She clasped a palm to her bodice. “Worse yet, what would your mother think? Family—not society—was the centerpiece of their lives. Not only did they teach you that principle, but they also lived it. How can you so easily discard what they’ve taught you?”

Sadness invaded her spirit. “If you permit this marriage, I don’t know how you can ever again hold your head high. Besides ruining your daughter’s life, your behavior shames the entire family.”

Her husband’s jaw twitched. Instead of softening his heart, she’d angered him further.

“I will not listen to—”

Dropping her hairbrush atop the vanity, Victoria jumped to her feet. “No need.” Before Jonas could say another word she rushed from the room. Now what? As she glanced down the hallway, her focus settled on Amanda’s bedroom door. Hastening to the door, she tapped lightly and waited only a moment before turning the knob. She didn’t want Jonas coming into the hallway and creating a scene that would be whispered about among the servants come morning.

She glanced over her shoulder to be certain all remained quiet before she closed the door behind her. Moonlight shone through the window and splashed across the room. Amanda pushed herself upward and leaned against the pillows. “Mother! What are you doing here at this time of night? Are you ill?”

“I’m fine—at least physically. However, I cannot say the same regarding my mental state.” She sat down on the edge of the bed and clutched Amanda’s hand within her own. “I simply cannot bear the idea of having you wed to Ellert Jackson. I have spoken to your father at length, but he refuses to listen.” Victoria continued to pour out her heart. Above all, she wanted to save Amanda from this horrid mistake.

“You can do nothing, Mother.” Amanda held her mother’s hand against her cheek. “There is nothing any of us can do. The agreement has been made. Ellert won’t hesitate to use every means available to ruin the family.”

“Let the family suffer financial ruination. I love you far too much to stand by while your father signs away your future.” Victoria scooted closer. “I have a plan,” she whispered.

Amanda fixed her with a wide-eyed stare. “Truly?” Amanda drew her legs to her chest and leaned forward until her chin rested upon her bended knees. “Tell me!”

“We will run away. If we dress now and hurry, Mr. Atwell can deliver us to Clayton. We can board the first train of the morning before anyone misses us. Once we’re in Rochester, we’ll gather the remainder of our belongings, take the train to New York City, purchase passage on the first available vessel, and sail for Europe. We can make our home abroad.”

When Amanda didn’t immediately answer, Victoria continued. “My plan will work. I know it will. We have friends enough in England and France who will help us once they learn of our need.”

“I’ll admit the idea is tempting, but too many people would suffer in the wake of such a decision.” Amanda shook her head. “No. I couldn’t. What about George and Jefferson? And what of William and Grayson and their families? And what about Father? I know you are angry with him, but he is your husband. What if he did harm to himself because of our decision to leave? Neither of us could ever forgive ourselves if such a thing would happen.”

Victoria hadn’t considered Jonas taking his life. He loved himself far too much to do such a thing—didn’t he? Yet her daughter’s questions haunted her. Could she bear the thought of alienating the rest of her family? What if none of them ever wanted to see her again? Unbidden tears rolled down Victoria’s cheeks, and Amanda pulled her into an embrace.

They clung together until Victoria’s tears were spent. She dabbed her eyes one final time and then glanced toward the door. “Your father is likely asleep by now. I should probably go back to our bedroom.”

Amanda nodded. “Thank you for your deep concern and love. We must not lose hope.”

Victoria smiled and kissed Amanda’s cheek. The young woman had maturity far beyond her years.

Once her mother left the room, Amanda leaned back against the pillows. Strange that she should be betrothed to a man who possessed money enough to ease the suffering of many. Yet he chose to hoard and increase his own finances while those around him suffered. “He’s completely oblivious to anyone’s needs or wants except his own,” Amanda muttered. She plumped the pillow behind her and reached for her Bible. How is it that the Lord blessed the likes of Ellert Jackson? she wondered. Shouldn’t God Almighty strike him down instead? It seemed that Ellert’s life was one of charmed existence. At least it had been for many years. Granted, he’d likely suffered in his early life, but shouldn’t that give him more reason to help those in need?

There was little doubt she’d be married to one of the wealthiest men in the country. Some said his fortune rivaled John D. Rockefeller, though Amanda found such assertions difficult to believe. Would a man of such wealth bother with the petty rivalry that he had displayed over the past months? Surely not. At any rate, Ellert’s finances would be of little concern to her. He was not a man who would be convinced to turn loose of his money unless he could even a score or gain a profit. Helping the poor wouldn’t qualify on either account. She hugged the Bible to her chest and closed her eyes. “You must help me, Lord, for there is no one else who will be with me. I earnestly pray that I won’t be forced to marry him, but if there is no other way, I pray that you will grant me peace and acceptance.”

Still holding the Bible in a firm grip, she closed her eyes and drifted to sleep.

24

Saturday, August 5, 1899

Walking downstairs the following morning, Amanda clenched her fingers into a tight fist. Ellert awaited her at the bottom of the steps. “I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to come down for breakfast.” He offered his arm and escorted her to the dining room. “You’ll not be remaining abed so late once you’re my wife. If I must be up and earning money, I expect every member of the household to do likewise.”

“And how shall I earn money, sir?”

He scowled at her flippant reply. “You will earn your keep by properly running my estate and by warming my bed at night.” He pulled a dining chair away from the table and bid her sit down. Once she was seated, he leaned close to her ear. “Be advised that I intend to take my pleasure with you quite often.”

His hot breath on her neck caused an involuntary shudder. She didn’t want to think about Ellert Jackson in such a way. She didn’t want to think of him at all. Ignoring his salacious remark, she signaled the servant to pour her coffee. “I have to go into Rochester with my cousins today for the final fitting of my wedding gown and their dresses.” She hoped he hadn’t detected her trepidation. “Please pass the cream,” she added, hoping to relieve the tension. How she wished another family member would join them at the table, but they’d probably eaten earlier. She silently chided herself for remaining upstairs until this late hour.

He handed her the silver cream pitcher. “I think not.”

She turned to face him. “A final fitting is required, or the gown will not be completed in time for the wedding. I can only imagine what the social column would say.
Ellert Jackson marries Amanda Blake on August 19. The bride’s gown was an ill-fitting dress of white satin with an unfinished hem and wide sleeves that drooped beyond the bride’s fingertips.
” She stabbed a piece of ham and dropped it onto her plate.

“Do you think I truly care what the newspaper writes about me—or you, for that matter? What I do or say is not controlled by newspapers or the old dowagers who consider themselves authorities on proper social etiquette. However, I do want you beautifully clothed when we are married, for I look forward to removing every article that you will wear.”

She felt dirty beneath his leering stare and turned away. “If you want my gown completed, I must go to Rochester.”

“And I said that you will not. Do you truly believe I would permit you to go to Rochester and visit your wonderful Dr. Carstead?” He pinched her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Do you think I’m so stupid that I don’t realize your true intent? You don’t care about your wedding gown or your cousins’ dresses. The only thing you care about is another secret meeting with that doctor.”

She twisted her head and freed herself from Ellert’s grasp. “Believe what you wish, but my only reason for going to Rochester is to keep my appointment with the seamstress.”

“I’ll send word to the owner of the shop. They can send seamstresses here to the island. I doubt the owner will refuse the amount of money I offer for special services.”

Amanda didn’t argue. It would be of little use. “Then I suppose you’d best send your message soon, or there won’t be sufficient time.” She pushed away from the table. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ve lost my appetite.”

Amanda had expected Ellert would bark an objection when she hastened from the room, but he surprised her and remained silent. She breathed a sigh of relief once she’d made it outdoors.

Fanny rounded the side of the house with a carefree spring to her step and waved at Amanda. “There you are. We missed you at breakfast. I was going to come and waken you, but your mother said I should permit you the extra sleep.” She drew closer, her eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Are you not feeling well?”

Before she could respond, Sophie bustled out the door and joined them. “Elizabeth is taking her morning nap. What time are we to leave for Rochester?”

Amanda shook her head. “We’re not going. Ellert has decreed that he will make arrangements with the shop owner to have seamstresses delivered to the island to fit my gown.” She hesitated a moment. “To fit all of our dresses.”

“But why?” Sophie demanded. “This is our final fitting, and it has been scheduled since the very first day you ordered our dresses. Why did you agree? Tell him you’re withdrawing your consent, and we are going to Rochester.”

Amanda struggled to keep her tears at bay. “I can’t. Ellert has made it clear that it would be in my best interest to do as he says.”

“He has made you his prisoner, and you’re not yet wed to him.” Sophie cupped Amanda’s face between her palms and stared into her eyes. “Listen to me—you cannot marry this man. Do you not realize what your life will be like?”

At the sound of footsteps approaching the door, Amanda freed herself from Sophie’s hold. If Ellert was watching them, she’d be quizzed about the conversation. “Why don’t the three of us walk down to the boathouse, where we can speak freely?” She hurried toward the path without awaiting a response from either of her cousins.

Once they were on the path, Sophie came alongside Amanda and grasped her hand. “I am at a complete loss, dear Cousin. At first I thought you’d agreed to this marriage simply to create some jealousy on Blake’s part. It’s obvious you’ve succeeded on that account, yet you still continue with your plans to marry this dreadful man. I know it cannot be Mr. Jackson’s wealth, for you know your father would never let you suffer from want.”

An unbidden frantic laughter escaped Amanda’s throat. She clasped a hand to her mouth to hold back the hysterical sounds that echoed through the trees.

Wide-eyed, Sophie grasped Amanda by the shoulders. “What has come over you?”

“She’ll explain once we’re at the boathouse,” Fanny said. She turned to Amanda. “You should tell Sophie.”

“That’s not fair. The two of you have been keeping secrets from me.” Sophie came to a halt and glared at them like a petulant child.

“Do cease your prickly behavior, Sophie. This is much more important than your bruised feelings. Once you hear the full extent of what has happened, your sympathies will be directed toward Amanda rather than yourself. Come along, now,” Fanny said, grasping Sophie’s hand and pulling her forward.

Although the door to the boathouse creaked in protest, the river’s familiar scent seemed to bid them come inside. Water slapped along the sides of the moored boats and swayed them in a peaceful rhythm that created a calming effect. Fanny pointed to the wooden chairs along the back wall.

“Let’s move them close to the window that overlooks the path. We want to be able to see anyone who might be coming in this direction,” Fanny said.

They formed the chairs in a semicircle. Once they’d each taken a seat, Sophie folded her hands in her lap and arched her brows. “I’m waiting.”

Amanda smiled at her cousin. Dear, dear Sophie. She was obviously doing her best to overcome her wounded feelings, but her tone of voice indicated she’d met with little success. “My intent was never to hurt your feelings by withholding information from you, Sophie. But my time alone with you has been limited since Ellert’s arrival on the island. And you are busy with Elizabeth and Paul. That is as it should be,” she quickly added.

Although relating the details of all that had occurred proved more taxing than Amanda had contemplated, she explained the agreement her father and Ellert had devised, as well as the fact that he had observed her with Blake when they’d gone to Round Island.

Sophie clasped her palm to her mouth at the revelation. “You mean while Paul and I were sitting on the porch of the Frontenac Hotel, Ellert was in a skiff on the river?”

Amanda nodded. “Yes. He saw us kiss, and though I can’t be certain, I believe he knows Blake visited with me upstairs in my room after he arrived with Uncle Quincy.”

“Blake visited you in your bedroom?” Sophie giggled. “I can’t believe my prim and proper cousin would entertain a man in her bedroom. I can only imagine what occurred during that visit.”

“Sophie!” Fanny’s scolding tone was enough to halt Sophie’s laughter. “I can attest to the fact that nothing happened. The door was left ajar, and I sat outside until he departed.”

“It’s all right, Fanny. I know Sophie was merely jesting. Because Ellert believes I’ll go and visit Blake, he won’t permit me to leave the island. To make matters worse, he insists we must live in New York City. I doubt he’ll grant me permission to visit you, but I’m hopeful that he will become more lenient with me once we are married.”

“I wouldn’t count on him loosening his stranglehold on you. I fear he’ll become even more possessive once you’re locked into your marriage vows,” Sophie replied.

“We should be offering Amanda encouragement,” Fanny said.

Sophie shrugged. “I believe it’s best to be honest with her. She needs to find some way out of this wedding, for she’ll never escape Mr. Jackson once they are wed.”

“I know you’re right, Sophie, but there is no way out.” While her cousins kept a mindful watch on the path, Amanda recounted her mother’s visit the previous evening.

Sophie inched forward on her chair. “What if we helped you escape without your mother? Surely Fanny and Michael have enough money to pay for your passage to Europe.” Sophie looked at Fanny for confirmation.

“We do, and I know Michael would agree to give Amanda sufficient funds, but that doesn’t resolve the problem.”

Amanda nodded. “She’s right, Sophie. Ellert has threatened to harm too many people if I refuse to go through with the marriage.” She didn’t feel she could share the threat Ellert had made on Blake’s life, so she continued from a different angle. “My escape would leave the family in financial ruination. Although Mother thinks she could survive such a disaster, I know she could not. And though my father has brought this upon himself, I believe he would take his own life rather than face the social ostracism that would follow public knowledge of his financial ruination.”

She met Fanny’s surprised expression. “I know he said your father was weak and pitiable for such an action years ago, but that was before my father faced his own personal demons. I think he has amassed more insight at this point in his life and more fully understands the depth of despair that can overwhelm the mind.”

“I hope he will never meet such an end, for there is always hope when we look to the Lord for guidance. Mrs. Atwell has helped me to understand that there is no problem that cannot be conquered with God’s help.”

Sophie nibbled her lip. “Then why don’t we have an answer for Amanda’s dilemma?”

Fanny sighed. “I’m not certain, but I continue to pray and trust that when the time is right, she will be delivered from this situation. To that end we must all remain diligent in our prayers.”

“Agreed,” Amanda replied.

Fanny and Amanda stared at Sophie.

“Agreed,” Sophie muttered. “But God had better hurry up, or you’re going to be in New York City before the end of the month.”

Not only did a seamstress and helper arrive at the island, but Mrs. Smithfield, the owner of the dress shop, came along to oversee the fittings. Though Amanda couldn’t be certain, she guessed that Ellert had paid dearly for the service. Much to Amanda’s relief, Mrs. Smithfield insisted he remain far away from the upstairs guest room that the servants had converted into a fitting room. The furniture had been moved to one side of the room or shoved into the hallway to provide adequate space for the seamstresses to complete their assigned tasks.

The time with her cousins proved to be a mixture of joy and sorrow. They laughed and reminisced about their very first grown-up dresses and many of the dresses they’d worn since that time. Yet beneath the laughter remained the foreboding that this might be last time they would be permitted to enjoy the company of one another. When Mrs. Smithfield finally announced that their task had been completed and she would return with the finished gowns the day before the wedding, Amanda longed to summon her back and insist upon one more fitting. Anything to prolong this time with her cousins and away from Ellert’s watchful eye.

Amanda remained in the room while the seamstresses followed Mrs. Smithfield like chicks scurrying after a mother hen. How she wished she could follow them to Rochester and go back to her work at the Home for the Friendless and to the warmth of Blake’s arms.

A short time later she trudged down the rear stairs, through the kitchen, down the hallway, and into the library in search of a book that might take her mind off of the approaching wedding and her future with Ellert. Slowly she traced her fingers along the leather spines, hoping one of the titles would capture her interest.

The sound of the approaching footsteps caused her to glance over her shoulder. “Good afternoon, Father. I’m looking for a book.”

“I’ve been looking for you ever since the seamstresses departed. Please come and sit down.” He closed the door and drew a deep breath.

Her father’s somber appearance and the fact that he had closed the door weren’t good signs. Had he been seeking her out to deliver additional bad news? She truly didn’t know if she could withstand anything further, yet it appeared there was little choice but to hear him out. She trudged toward the chair, her feet growing heavier with each step.

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