A Wedding Affair (The Wedding Affair) (30 page)

Hail the conquering hero
’s is all I have to say
I question his actions as well, can a man make love and fuck a women like that without having a some type of deep love and affection for her?
In his defense he did tell me he loves me, before pillaging me, I believe he proved his point quite well actually branding me in such a carnal and omnivorous way he made me sorely his. I even hate my own sarcasm sometimes. I roll my eyes at myself as I floor it through downtown Cleveland.

I sigh
, a sigh of relief as I blend into downtown traffic and head home. I round the corner of my street and head towards my house to get my head and heart in order for Ian's return home. 

I am
home in record time, I reek of sex and Tristan, I jump into the shower with hopes of washing off the
scarlet letter ‘A’
and Tristan’s scent off of me, as they are both burned into my soul.

I got rid of the ashtray from the backyard
.  I don’t need Ian finding anything to question me about.

I looked in my closet for something that makes me look as innocent
as possible, jeans and a t-shirt I find my trusty flat. No makeup and maybe a sprinkling of holy water for good measure should do the trick.

Yes that is my plan to look as
inconspicuous as possible and pray that he is dog tired and will not want to have sex tonight. I give it another thought and Ian and I are never hot and heavy we had sex once and that was it, he doesn’t egg me on, he doesn’t talk sexually to me and he sure as hell doesn’t fuck me leaving me wanting more…is this a sign? Is this a problem? Shit is this a wake-up call? I don’t know… too much to ponder right now I grab my keys and my bag and head to the airport to pick up my fiancé you know the guy I should be fucking. Gosh I’m so going to hell for sure.

-------<>-------

Ten o’clock pm,
I pull up to the arrival flights and there he is waiting for me, bag in hand his hair blowing in the wind, his innocence makes me smile from ear to ear, I get out and run into his arms, hoping and praying that he doesn’t question me about my weekend, I look into those big brown eyes of his did I miss him? Well he sure as hell missed me as he picks me up and swings me around as he holds me close to him, my emotions get the best of me and I hold onto him.

“Dark eyes
, how I have missed you so much, come on let’s get home” that has always been his pet name for me “dark eye” he puts me down and of course he puts me in the passenger seat and he takes the wheel.

We
get home and he is tired, I warmed up some eggplant parmesan for our dinner before I went to get him from the airport.

“Aria this is delicious you really are a great cook”

“Thank you I always cook on Sundays and pack the freezer” we feasted on delicious eggplant parmesan and caprese salad. We sit at the kitchen table and share a meal as Ian fills me in on how his weekend went.

“I had a chance to see some of my old students and get some of my old books and things that I had forgotten, I met my replacement it is a women she
seems to have her way of doing things”

“So that is it you are now finished with Chicago and here at Case Western fulltime?”

“Yes that chapter in my life is over and I am here full time now”

“That is wonderful Ian”

“Oh before I forget there is a faculty dinner here on Tuesday evening I hope you can join me; I would like you to meet some my colleagues?”

“Yes
of course I will make sure I am there Ian” he reaches over and kisses me

“
Oh Ian you look so exhausted, why don’t you go and take a shower and I will clean up this mess and then we can turn in together.

He yawns and his eyes are droopy
, he is beat, he is so tired you can see it on his face but then again he loves to sleep, I envy him so, how he can dose and fall from this world so easily.

“Good idea you got all this covered?

“Yes just go I have been cleaning up after myself for a long time now”

“Aria, I don’t want to ever crowd you, and I don’t want you picking up after me, we are here for each other”

“Thank you for the thought, you look so tired go let me take care of this and I will meet you in bed” He kisses me on the cheek, very sweet of him and he heads up stair.

I cleaned the kitchen and a thought runs through my mind
does he want sex? Oh shit I hope not, oh no I really can’t, I have been sexed in ways I never knew possible over the past twenty-four hours, and I am still
sore
. I head up stairs.

T
o my surprise when I come into the bedroom Ian has on his pajama bottoms, he had a quick shower and he reaches for a t shirt from his chest of drawers climbing into bed he sets the alarm and his head hits the pillow.

I head to my closet and
change into my pink silk night shirt, and head to our bathroom and brush my teeth and wash my face. My reflection hides my secret I look the same, but then I think I look different, or is it the way I see things that are now different? I take my hair down from my pony tail and head back to the bedroom, Ian is barely awake I slip into bed next to him as he pulls me to him and he curls up next to me.

“You feel so good Aria”
he kisses me good night and rests his head on my shoulder as he passes out in seconds, gosh I am amazed at how he can just drift from this world into slumber, me I’m wide awake staring at the ceiling. I don’t sleep well, I never have, growing up in a house filled with eight kids and two parents it was never quiet, so now being alone all these years I find it hard to sleep, to wind down. I have always been the night owl as sleep has never knocked at my door looking for me.

I have always
worked nights into the wee small hours of the morning, I have always been married to my work, to my career and working all these hours I have found myself more wound up and it always articulated into drinks after work and that is how Tristan and I always spent our time together.

I remember when I first met Tristan w
e were both very professional at first, our work relationship was par for the course we were the killing team at the office, we had the inside information, the who’s and the what’s, we bounced off each, there was always this energy between us at work that made us successful, but when the drinks started flowing we couldn’t deny it was too much for both of us to handle, afterhours he was reckless back then and me I was so innocent and naïve, it was beyond my comprehension, I was attracted to Tristan and drawn in by his passion and determination, we worked well together, we made a lot of money together and we both got in way over our heads, it was definitely Charles Dickens ‘Tales of Two Cities’… ‘
it was the best of times…it was the worst of times
…’ my phone goes off and I am brought back from my wayward thoughts.

BLEEP BLING…

Who is texting me? I put my phone on silent.

216-651-9588

“A Taste of my own medicine, you walking out on me!”

I smile as I shake my head its Tristan, he is relentless, but I’m not mad
, and as I look over at Ian asleep I don’t know what to do.

Aria

“I need time to process all of this I am sorry I left like you”

Tristan

“No need for apologies, I will try to be patient”

Aria

“I had a lovely weekend with you and rod”

Tristan

“OH DID YOU KNOW!…or did you mean Rod Stewart?”

I laugh out loud and Ian stirs next to me, shit this is dangerous
.

Aria

“You are naughty as ever
with your dirty mind…”

Tristan

“Yes I have a dirty mind and you are on it”

Aria

“I will miss you…”

Tristan

“I’ll find a way to see you again”

Aria

“A few more stolen moments”

Tristan

“Some of the best moments in life

Are the ones you can’t tell anyo
ne about!”

Aria

“So I will take this weekend to the grave”

ok now he just made me wet and he’s not even here

Tristan

“I’ll do things you’ll never forget”

Aria

“You already have…go to sleep”

Tristan

“It’s only 11:30pm…what no sex with the professor?
GOOD”

Aria

“That is none of your fucking business”

Tristan

“You know I got something for that sexual frustration of yours”

He made me laugh and smile
, he is too much, I sigh and relax.

Aria

“Good night I have work tomorrow”

Tristan

Good night my
naughty Marietta

I put my phone on my night stand and I think to myself all I ever wanted was
a love that would last forever,
is it the one beside me in my bed? Or the one on the night stand who gets me wet?

Hone
stly Ian has never been that sexual a guy, yet he is sweet, kind and he says he loves me. The crazy thing is who can I talk to about this, should I even consider changing all my plans with Ian to be with Tristan?

Should I just tell Ian and then he will make my decision for me by walking out? Can I talk to Erika about this? She hates Tristan, come to think of it,
none of my friends care for him really. Can I marry Ian and keep Tristan on the side? Jeez I should slap myself for that thought! Oh wow what if Ian hits me because of what I did? I mean I cheated, not accidentally, but willingly ‘
I went gentle into another man’s good-night’
Do I even deserve Ian? Shit does Tristan even deserve me? And Jesus, Mary and Joseph, I am so sore, how long will this last? I sink two Aleve and hope he
Aleve’s me alone
. My sarcasm is running in overtime this evening.

It’s after midnight and
I still have delicious memories of Tristan wow just a thought to ponder I slept so good last night and the night before why can’t I sleep now? Should I try and talk to my mom?... How about my brothers?... I gotta do what is right for me!...nah  no one can make this decision for me it has to be my choice!

I think I better try and get some sleep.
One last thought Nah Ian would never hit me.

I Dose off with images of Trista
n at his piano and me under it, with all these children in his big beautiful house.

Chapter 16

MANIC MONDAY

June 18,
2012

Its Monday morni
ng, Ian has an early eight am class. I don’t have to be at the store until ten am but as you know I can’t sleep, I have been up since five am, I worked out, I cleaned and vacuumed  and made breakfast, I love to bake bread I make awesome homemade breads and rolls, I have been baking since I was five or so with my mom and my grandmother and then of course with the nuns from our church I use to help them bake the bread for communion so this morning I made cinnamon rolls, Ian said the aroma woke him up.

I thought it would be nice to eat on
the terrace outside, so I set the table for us not as nice as the Ritz, but it will do. I made spinach omelets my famous hazelnut coffee and of course cinnamon rolls fresh from the oven.

Ian
is reading the
NEW YORK TIMES,
as he digs in and his smile says it all, he thoroughly enjoys the fruits of my labor. I play with my omelet and pick at my cinnamon roll as I down two cups of coffee, but surprisingly Ian doesn’t see any change in me at all. That’s a good thing for me at least. My mind wanders off course to Tristan, a shy smile comes across my face and Ian questions me.

“Aria did you remember we have that faculty dinner tomorrow evening?” shit completely slipped my mind.