A Weekend Getaway (16 page)

“Yes. I mean all the guys lusted after Ivy, but she was
exhausting, don’t you think?”

Beth laughed. “I lived with her, so I know. One time she had
two dates on the same night, so she purposely picked a fight with the first guy
in order to make it to the next one.”

“It’s a shame she dropped out of college and never really
did anything with her life.”

“She sings.”

“True. And she’s very talented. But I guess I find
contentment in being a mom, knitting hats and scarves for my kids, sharing my
passion with others through my website. I just wonder how satisfied Ivy is at
the end of the day.”

Beth cringed. “Being a mom isn’t the only thing that gives
life meaning.”

“I’m sorry. That was so insensitive of me. Gosh, I can’t
believe I said that.”

Squeezing her temple with her free hand, Beth started
pacing.

Sarah continued, trying to pull her foot out of her mouth.
“All I meant was that Ivy never thinks beyond herself. She has a lot going for
her, but she’s still kind of . . . I don’t know . . . selfish. She wouldn’t
even help sort clothes at the Salvation Army.”

Beth kept marching back and forth along the brick building. “I
didn’t mean to overreact, it’s just that Drew and I are in a weird place and
now Hannah wants to meet me. I’m very emotional. Will seeing her give me the
answer? Will I know whether to stay with Drew and be content raising his niece
or will I realize that I need my own child? If so, it looks like I’ll have to
break up with Drew.”

“He doesn’t want to build a life with you?”

“He does, just his picture and my picture are completely
different. I practically cornered him the other night trying to get a marriage
proposal out of him. I hate myself and I hate him because he acted like it was
too much.”

Sarah made a sympathetic murmur over the line. “If he can’t
commit, then I understand why you’d move on. I know it’s hard, though.”

Closing her eyes for a moment, she stopped pacing. “Part of
me wants him to meet my daughter, too. I mean, hopefully she’ll become a part
of my life now.” She leaned her shoulder against the damp brick and let out a
whoosh of air. “I thought I’d have my act together by the time I was in my
thirties. I can’t believe I might have to start all over. Find a place to live,
start dating. I’m too old for this!”

“Beth, you’re too old to stay with the wrong guy. You’re not
too old to go find the right one, though. It’s never too late to fall in love.
My grandfather was a widow for ten years and then he fell in love with a woman
in his Scrabble club. They’ve been married for six months already and he’s so
happy.”

“I was happy the first six months I was with Drew, too. Does
being married help you overlook the little annoying habits he has? I mean, he
still hasn’t painted Emma’s room and he never folds the laundry and he never
compliments me on my weight loss.” Didn’t he care how hard she’d worked? She
wrestled with every pound.

Sarah let out a laugh. “I could get a new haircut and my
husband wouldn’t say anything. But I try to focus on the good things, like how
he always remembers to change the oil in my car or air up my tires. How he asks
me if I’d rather take the kids trick or treating or stay home and pass out the
candy.”

Bad memories caused Beth to look heavenward and shake her
head. “Drew worked through Halloween this year. The truth is, he says he feels
like Emma’s his own daughter, but he lets me do most of the childcare.” She’d
never considered this before. Drew wasn’t exactly playing the role of an
involved father. “It’s a great thing what he’s doing for Emma, don’t get me
wrong. Her mom is a scatter brain with terrible taste in men. But I’m the one
who gets Emma fed and dressed every morning, I’m the one who usually takes and
picks her up from daycare, and I’m the one who notices when she’s outgrown her
shoes.”

“Sounds like you are a mom.”

“
Awww
. Thanks.”

But Beth knew it wasn’t true.

# # #

That evening Beth hung her coat on the antique coat rack as
Drew looked up from the couch where he lay watching Star Trek’s “The Trouble
with
Tribbles
.”

She walked closer to him. She couldn’t wait to tell him how
much Luke liked her idea of designing vitamin bottles to look more like perfume
decanters. Sometime soon she’d break the news about her flight to Texas, too.
But that could be put on hold just a bit longer. “How are you feeling?”

“Not so good.”

“The daycare said Missy picked up Emma.” It felt wrong to
drive home in an empty car. She missed the happy chatter from the backseat, but
she knew Drew liked to be alone when he was sick.

“I asked her to. Speaking of kids, I got a strange call
today.” He studied her. “Some girl said she was your daughter.”

Beth sucked in air. Her heart pounded as her mind flew into
overdrive. She wasn’t fully prepared for this. But here it was.

Ready or not, it was time to come clean. She turned off the
TV and took a seat on the fainting couch catty-corner to him. Gathering her
courage, she took a deep breath. “Years ago. . .
I.
.
. had a baby.”

He bolted upright, clenching a tissue in his hand. “What? Are
you serious?”

 
“Yes. I was too
young to take care of her. I thought it would be best if she were raised by a
couple who desperately wanted her, so I placed her for adoption.”

“Just like my sister.” His hand rubbed his stomach as if the
pain demanded his attention.

Beth shook her head. “Not just like your sister. She put her
first baby up for adoption, lets us raise her second and now is pregnant for
the third time. I realized my mistake and never had unprotected sex again.”

He lowered his copper eyebrows. “How could you let strangers
take your kid? Didn’t your parents want her?”

“I didn’t tell them. I was embarrassed and ashamed so I
handled things on my own.”

“And now you’re pressuring me to get married and have a
baby. When were you going to tell me you already had one? I can’t believe you’d
keep something this big from me.”

“I know I should’ve told you. I just opened up to my mom a
few days ago. For a long time, I blocked the whole thing from my mind.” Did she
dare tell him about Parker’s lawsuit? This was her chance to see how devoted
Drew was. “Lately I realize I have to face things. In fact, I hope you’ll
support me because there’s more.” She wrung her hands, feeling her pulse throb
in her neck. “The baby’s father is suing me.”

“What? Why would he do that?”

She drew in a breath. “I never told him about the baby
either.”

 
“You had a baby
and kept it a secret from everyone? How could you do that to the baby’s
father?” His watery eyes narrowed as if he were thinking. “Who is it? Who’s the
father?”

She stared at the wooden floor. “No one you know.” Funny how
she’d kept her old life and new one separate. “You’ve probably heard me talk
about him. Parker.”

“Isn’t he married to your friend?”

Even now, this fact caused her stomach to twist. “That’s why
I didn’t tell him about the pregnancy.” She tried to explain how she’d spared
Parker the tough decisions.

Drew’s expression remained disapproving. “You’re not the
person I thought you were.”

She twirled a lock of her hair nervously, like she’d done when
she was young. “Try to remember when you were twenty. Wasn’t it your biggest
nightmare that you’d get a girl pregnant?”

 
“If I had a
child, I’d want to know. You had no right.” He stared at the blank TV screen. “I
would’ve raised Missy’s first baby, too. But I was off at MIT and she was here.
She and my mom arranged the adoption without my knowledge. The way I see it,
adoption should only be a last resort.”

“It was.” She’d made a mistake in trusting him. He was
holier than thou, just like her father. “Everything’s changed now. I want to
meet my daughter. And I’m lucky because she has agreed.” Joy lifted her spirits
for a moment. “That’s probably why she called. To make arrangements.”

“And you’re being sued? Thank God I never put your name on
the deed to the house.”

Fury burned inside her. “Yes. Thank God your precious house
is safe! The house I’ve worked side-by-side with you for the past year to fix.
Don’t you care at all about me? What I’m going through?”

Sweat beaded on his face. He lay down on the arm of the
couch. “You act like you’re so much better than my sister and you’re just as
messed up.”

“I’m not messed up. I was young and naive. But now I’m all
grown and I know what I want. The question is, are you going to be here for me
or not?” She felt bad for him, having an argument when he was clearly ill. But
he was the one who started it.

He put both hands on his stomach. “Not now, Beth.”

“I know. Not now. Not ever.” She climbed the stairs to their
bedroom and started packing.

She wasn’t sure where she would go, but she had to get away
from Drew. She didn’t want to sleep in
his
house or in
his
bed. She didn’t have
to defend herself to him. She was tired of apologizing to everyone for her
youthful indiscretion and the decision she’d been forced to make.

In a moment of déjà vu, she lugged her suitcase down the
creaky stairs all by herself. As she loaded her bag into her car, she realized
the temperature had dropped and the day’s precipitation had morphed into ice.
Thank goodness her trench coat had a wool lining.

Driving across town, she struggled to maintain a safe speed
for the road conditions. Eventually she pulled up in front of Sarah’s yellow
Colonial. A kid’s bike leaned up against the now bare tree in the front yard,
flurries accumulating on the vinyl seat. A red wagon had been abandoned nearby
as well. The
d.j
. on the radio warned of an impending
snow storm and Beth was glad to have arrived. Practically overnight, autumn had
given way to winter.

She decided to leave her luggage in the car and knock first.
She should’ve called, but hadn’t planned on ending up here. Drew had been so
cold. So judgmental. It wasn’t fair for him to look back and say she should’ve
done things differently. Easy for him to say. Missy was lucky that he was in a position
to step in and help raise Emma. But Beth had felt completely alone in her time
of need. Except for Sarah.

After a deep sigh, Beth dropped the keys in her purse and
pulled the collar up on her coat. She darted through the white flakes for the
door. Just as her index finger pointed at the doorbell, she heard yelling and a
dog barking inside.

“You spent $228 at a shoe store?” a loud male voice boomed.

“All of the kids had outgrown their winter boots from last
year.”

“I don’t know how we’re going to pay the bills this month. I
think you need to get a job.”

Beth froze. She’d never heard Sarah’s husband yell. Then she
heard Sarah answer, “But homeschooling works great for our kids. You can’t take
that away from them.”

“Maybe you can work in the evenings or weekends. I don’t
know. But we can’t keep going like this.”

She turned on her heel and raced through the blowing snow
back to her car. It took three tries to shove her key in the ignition. She
couldn’t drive away fast enough.

Berating herself, she noticed the street glistening beneath
her headlights and she slowed to a safer speed. She shouldn’t have assumed that
everything was sunshine and rainbows all the time at Sarah’s house. Just
because the woman never complained didn’t mean everything was perfect. It just
meant she was trying to keep her household running smoothly. Hopefully they
could find a solution. Unlike Beth and Drew.

Red taillights flashed in front of her and she hit the
brakes.

The car fishtailed.

Gripping the wheel tight, she jerked it instinctively.

Somehow she regained control. She shook her head, her heart
racing. “That was close.”

Slowing down, she headed for a hotel. This was where she
should’ve gone in the first place. She’d been selfish, wanting to get sympathy
from Sarah over Drew’s horrible reaction. Saying he was glad her name wasn’t on
the house. Saying adoption should only be a last resort. Comparing her to his
sister. Yet that’s what she’d always feared he’d do when he found out. Now she
knew for sure.

By the time she parked at the closest hotel, she’d calmed
down a bit. She checked in her rearview mirror to make sure her face didn’t
betray her misery. Not too bad. Again, she pulled up her coat’s collar and
braved the cold to find shelter. Snow had painted the parking lot white. She
hoped this weather wouldn’t affect her flight.

Once she entered the office, she greeted the Asian woman
behind the counter. “Can I have a room for the night?” She brushed snowflakes
out of her hair as she tried to warm up.

The woman shook her head. “I’m afraid we’re all booked.”

“Oh.” Beth hadn’t expected that.

“The storm knocked out electricity on the south side of
town, so a lot of people are checking into hotels.”

Beth nodded slowly. “It’s too cold not to have heat.” But
this meant she might not be able to find a room. “Any suggestions where I
should go?”

The woman ran her hand through her sleek black hair. “Can’t
you go home?”

Without answering, Beth shifted her weight and sighed.
“Thanks.” She turned and exited.

Can’t you go home? Good question.

Twenty minutes later she sat outside of the house she’d
grown up in, trying to work up her nerve. She hadn’t been inside since she
announced that she was co-
habitating
with Drew. Her
dad had said he was disappointed in her. He ‘d promised she would someday
regret her decision. And she had slammed the door behind her, muttering that he
was too old-fashioned. He would see.