Against All Odds (30 page)

She laughs mirthlessly, her eyes filling with disbelief. “What are you now? The fucking Brady Bunch after a couple days?” She throws her hands up and shakes her head. “Wake up, Cooper. She’s going to screw you over again. It’s inevitable. Do you really think she’s going to be faithful to you?”

“We had an agreement, Layla. There was no unfaithfulness in my marriage. I knew what she was doing.” Of course I felt betrayed by my wife, but Layla doesn’t need to know that.

“Are you sure you knew exactly what she was doing?” she asks. “She’s been pretty damn cozy with Grayson. Wasn’t that one of your ridiculous
‘lines in the sand’
?”

I try to stay calm, reminding myself that Kylie insists nothing is going on between her and Grayson. No deep feelings, no sex, and that I can deal with. We’d set boundaries, and as messed up as they were, they were there for a reason. Yes, I led myself to believe I’d get over the men she would rotate through her door, but I knew that if she’d fallen in love and had sex with Gray, I would lose it. It’d sever us completely. He’s like my brother, and I’d feel fucking lethal if there was something deep going on there that she’s lied to me about.

“There’s nothing there. He looked after her, and obviously they’ve developed a close friendship, but that’s it. Not that any of this is your business.”

“Are you sure about that?”

My blood’s thrashing in my ears like angry waves in the middle of a thunderstorm. I don’t know what I think or what I’m sure about, but I know I’m going to give Kylie the benefit of the doubt, because we’ve both repeatedly fucked up. She knows me better than anyone in this world and her screwing Gray would be like me screwing Cali.

She wouldn’t do it.

“I want my wife back, and nothing you’re saying or trying to get me to believe will change that. I love her, Layla. The past two years have been nothing short of torturous, but I finally have her back. I’m not going to let you or Gray get in the way.”

She whips her head back and forth, her eyes flaring. “You’re being naïve. You don’t know her, Coop. You think you do, but she’s changed. You’ve told me everything she’s done because you needed someone to confide in. Taking her back and playing house like nothing’s happened is stupid. You’re both not even close to being able to move on. I don’t know why you bothered staying married to that nasty bitch.”

That comment sends me fucking volcanic. Heat swells deep within my chest, lava spewing from every fiber of my being. “Are you fucking kidding me? You have no idea what we’ve been through. It’s a nightmare watching your dead child being pulled from your wife’s body. You have no damn clue what it’s like to see the life drain out of her or how fucking powerless and pathetic it makes you feel. Do not ever come at me and degrade my wife and our marriage.” I try to control the shaking that’s ripping through my every fucking muscle.

“She’s my soul, Layla, and I don’t deserve her. You might not understand that, but I don’t deserve one ounce of her. Have we fucked up? Yes. But it’s not your place to say shit to me about my marriage. My mistake was getting involved with you in the first place. I should have never said a word to you about Kylie.”

She looks stunned, but I’m not done. I lightly grip her face, not letting her eyes budge from my stare. I would never hurt a woman, but she needs to know that talking about Kylie in such a way is crossing the mother of all lines.

“Let me fill you in on something,” I say, my tone heated. “My life, from this moment forward, is not up for discussion. Know your place. We weren’t serious. We were never serious. You got that?”

She blanches, but recovers quickly. I grip her tighter, trying to make my point. This girl’s a live-wire, which is what attracted me to her in the first place, but I won’t stand for her talking about my marriage.

“Fine.” She swallows, her eyes filling with anger. “If you want her, then have her. I’m not going to beg for a man, not even you. I have more self-respect than that. We had a good thing, and I thought we could have become more.” We stare at each other, breathing hard, our emotions raging. After a minute, her eyes fill with tears. “I really care about you, Cooper.”

“Shit, don’t do this, Layla. This is a mess.” I let her face go and step back. I hate this world I’ve created, and most of all, I hate that I’ve taken other people down with me.

“Yeah, it is a mess,” she says. “But I can’t say I didn’t see it coming. I think you’re making a big mistake. She’s never going to love you the way you want her to. The moment you disagree or can’t give her what she wants, she’s going to pull back from you.” She pauses, her voice dropping low and concerned. “Think about how you’re going to feel when she betrays you again. How hollow it’s going to leave you.”

My muscles ache. It’s hard to trust a woman who’s broken me. My head’s fucked up, but I’d rather take the risk of Kylie crushing me than go on without her. I need her. It’s clear I can’t function without her.

“Cooper, when I first saw you, that light in your eyes was gone. You were a hurt, broken man. I wanted to bring you back, and I think when we made love, you did. You came back. I saw you. I saw your heart, and I’m the kind of woman who can take care of that.”

I scrub my hand across my face, moving farther away from her. “I’m sorry. I thought I was clear with you. I told you nothing would ever come of this. We’ve never made love,” I say, wincing that she thought we did. “It was just sex.” Her face falls. Shit, I don’t want to hurt her. “I love her. There’ll never be anyone else for me. It was always and will always be her. Love’s unconditional, but it’s not perfect. I’m not perfect, and neither is she. We’ve made our mistakes, but she’s my heart. She’s in my blood. I need her on a level that you can’t understand. Fuck, I can’t even understand it.”

“I know you love her. I’m not saying you don’t,” she whispers. “I saw it, I heard it. Don’t think I didn’t feel her hovering in the background while we were together. But it’s dysfunctional, unhealthy, and it’s going to destroy you, Cooper. It almost did.” She walks up to me and lays her palm on my cheek. “Look at me.”

My heart beats erratically. I promised Kylie I wouldn’t let her touch me, that I would keep my distance. I shoot my eyes to hers. They look soft, sorrowful. The anger between us is gone. This has gone from hot to too close, too quickly.

“I’m sorry,” I say, stepping back. “Nothing you or I could say from this point on is going to get us anywhere. It’s over. You need to let it go. I think its best we keep our distance, and that means that I can’t have you working here as my assistant anymore.”

A tear spills down her cheek, and I feel like an asshole. I didn’t think she’d feel as strongly as she does. Opening myself to her was a mistake. It created a closeness that wasn’t meant to happen. I crossed a boundary with Layla.

“So this is it?” she whispers.

“Yeah, this is it.”

“Are you a hundred percent sure she’s what you want, Coop?” She searches my face almost desperately, trying to find some hope.

“I’m a hundred and fifty percent sure.”

She shakes her head. “Okay. That’s it then. Go back to your wife.”

“I’m still going to pay you and I’ll make things available to you so you can find another job.” I’m not a complete piece of shit. I’ve just imploded her life, where she works, her heart.

“I don’t care about the money, Cooper,” she says quietly. “I have plenty of that.”

“I’m sorry, Layla.”

Tears and heartache paint her face. I feel so much remorse for getting involved with her. “Yeah, me too.” For a moment, the silence is awkward, both of us unsure of what to say. “Well, I guess I’m going.”

I nod, not sure what else to do.

Her shoulders tremble, and she offers me a weak smile. She lays her hand on my face, and I try not to flinch away. I’ve hurt this girl enough. “Be careful with her. Guard your heart, Cooper.” She plants a tender kiss on my cheek and strokes my jaw as if memorizing me.

My hands itch to offer her some comfort. I don’t dare move, though. There’s no way I’ll betray my wife more than I already have. She looks at me one last time then turns and walks out. When the door shuts, I blow out a sigh of relief. That was hard. Really fucking hard. Thank God it’s over.

Grayson’s next.

An hour later, I’m still sitting at my desk and trying to get Layla out of my head. What she said about Kylie and Grayson has been playing in my mind. The fact that she honed in on that unnerves me. I planned to spend the evening with Kylie, but I can’t go the night with this hanging over my head. I have to face him. I need to get to the bottom of this. It’s time Gray stepped out of our lives and gave us space.

My nagging fears are turning into a paranoid rage. He and I barely talk, and when we do, it almost always ends with one of us telling the other to fuck off. He warned me, time and time again, that he wouldn’t let me hurt Kylie anymore. I didn’t take his threats seriously. Grayson doesn’t know who I am anymore, and in truth, I’ve done nothing over the last two years to deserve his loyalty. I shoot him a text, asking him to meet me at his house tonight. There’s no point in delaying the inevitable, and there are some things my friend needs to be clued in on. He messages back, saying he’ll meet me at eight. I go with it.

The only thing left to do is figure out how to keep Ky busy. I’m sure she won’t be thrilled at the idea of spending the night alone while I’m off dealing with this bullshit. After a few brainstorming texts with Cali, and a couple of calls and internet searches, I secure tickets for Kylie and Cali to see Justin Timberlake and Jay Z. It wasn’t easy and the tickets cost me quite a bit, but it’ll be worth it if it helps keep her mind off what I’m doing. I arrange for a car to bring them back and forth and dinner reservations for them before they go out.

I leave my office in search of Kylie, knowing I’ll find her with Calia. Together, the two of them are trouble. I round the corner to Kylie’s office, and the sound of laughter trickles through her door. I enter and see her smiling face. Warmth travels from her in my direction, causing my lips to tip up at the corners. I look into the eyes I’ve sold my soul to, and my insides heat when I see her gaze lick my skin. It’s as if I can feel her eyes like the stroke of fingertips as she soothes my stress. God, I love the way she looks at me. It makes me feel like a fucking king.

“Hey, baby,” I murmur, my body coming to life at the sight of her sensuous curves and angel face.

“Hi.” She smiles, flipping her eyes briefly back to mine.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” The world around me falls away.

“Of course,” she says with a sexy rasp.

I keep my eyes trained on hers. She stands and comes around her desk to meet me. The air thickens as I wrap my arms around her. The need to feel her floods my veins like heated whiskey snaking its way down my body. She slides her arms around my neck and looks up, those eyes melting me.

I crush my lips to hers and thrust my tongue in her mouth. I stroke her eagerly, wanting her so damn bad. I want to drown my fears in her and wash my mind of Gray and Layla with her heat. She goes limp in my arms, her nipples hardening against my chest. A possessive growl barrels through me. I’m desperate to drag her across the desk and bury myself inside her. I want to forget about all the bullshit and love the fuck out of her.

She drags her hands through my hair. I pick her up, gripping her firm ass. It feels so good to have her soft flesh against mine. I kiss her with fervor, hunger. I’m desperate to remind her that two years apart were a mistake. It’s created a cesspool of pure sexual, carnal and primal need. I’m about to drag her across the desk when I hear someone clear their throat with a laugh. I pull away and swing my head toward the sound.

Cali laughs, her eyes twinkling. “Jesus Christ, please don’t stop on my behalf.” She waves as if to say ‘continue.’ “I mean, I don’t mind stepping out for a minute while you two gorilla-fuck the crap out of each other.” She chuckles, fanning herself. “Whew, I’m damp over here.”

“Oh my God. Fuck off, Cali,” Kylie says, laughing as a blush stains her cheeks.

“Shit,” I mutter, setting her down.

“Uh, uh, uh, wrong word there, Hulk. More like ‘Holy fucking shit, tiger.’ I’m still tingling over here, and my nips are on fire. Come tend to me, Ky,” she whispers, her eyes rolling back as if she’s going to faint.

A chuckle pulls from my chest as I take a good look at Cali. I swear that girl’s nuts, but Kylie loves her.