Alive (2 page)

“Abigail McCarthy?” I’m not sure I’m why I’m answering his question with a question, I obviously know my name.

“You sure about that? You don’t seem so confident with your answer.” He’s laughing at me now. Oh great, so now I’m amusing him. I just need to leave; his smirk is pissing me off.

“I need to get to class, now will you please excuse me; I’ve wasted enough time with you already this morning.” I grumble. While I’m collecting my things he’s still standing there smiling at me. Stop looking at his lips, stop looking at his lips, stop looking at his lips. That’s the mantra I’m repeating in my head until I can get away from him. I glance up at his mouth one more time and I can’t help but think what it would feel like to have his lips on me. Seriously, I need a reality check, surely these thoughts are not appropriate to have after meeting someone for only a few minutes. And surely, it’s not possible for me to have those types of feelings for a guy at all. I need to get away.

I practically dart to class, except this time I’m a little more careful, I don’t want a repeat of what just happened. As I enter my first period class, I am greeted with a scowl from my English teacher. Lovely. Just fucking lovely.

“Already making a great first impression on your first day of school, I see.” Jessie told me horror stories of how horrible and cruel Mrs. Shelkey could be, and the last thing I wanted to do was to be on her bad side. Great, so much for making good impressions on my teachers.

“Ahh, and Mr. Alexander, how nice of you to join us as well. I see running late is still an issue for you. If you both are late again to my class, you will be sorry,” she sternly says.

I turn around and see the beautiful boy from the hallway staring at me. His lips are slightly turned up at the sides, and he looks like he is trying to hide his smile. There are two empty seats in the front of the class, and since we are the last to arrive, we are the lucky ones who get to sit front and center during Mrs. Shelkey’s class. I’m not going to lie, I’m a little nervous. She scares me.

“Looks like we meet again, Peaches. Why’d you run away from me?” He did not just call me Peaches. Do I look like a piece of fruit? If I had one word to describe myself, a piece of fruit would not come to mind, I’m anything but sweet. I’m actually a little bitter, so maybe lemon suits me better.

“Peaches? My name is Abigail.” I glare my eyes at him, and turn to face the front; I do not want Mrs. Shelkey to catch me not paying attention.

“Oh, is it? Since you weren’t so sure this morning, I decided to name you myself.” He says with a satisfied expression on his face.

“Do these cheesy lines and cute nicknames work on all the girls? Let me let you in on a little secret, I’m not like most girls, so your flirtatious ways won’t work on me.” Although if I’d admit it, it would be nice to be normal like most girls and not have to put up a guard all the time. God, does he ever stop smirking. I need to focus on something other than his mouth. I am kicking myself, I hate that I find him and his mouth attractive at all.

“So you think the nickname is cute then. I knew you would.”

He has both eyebrows slightly raised and is giving me a smug grin. I can’t believe I said the nickname was cute. A peach is a piece of fruit for god’s sake, nothing cute about a little ball of fuzz.

“Hi Adam, how was your summer? Want to go to a party with me Friday night?”

Ahhh, so Adam is his name. A girl from two seats over is batting her perfectly mascaraed eye lashes at him, waiting for his reply. She looks just like his type too. Perfect, blonde, a real life Barbie doll. Every school has a few girls like her. Why is he even wasting his time flirting with me, I am so far from his type it’s not even funny. I’m dark and twisty, while he seems perky and happy. Overly happy people make me want to gouge me eyes out with my number 2 pencil. 

“I don’t know, it all depends on if Peaches here will allow me to see other girls. She tends to be on the jealous side.” Oh my god, he did not just say that.

“Up until two seconds ago, I didn’t even know your name, and you can spend your time with whomever you see fit, but it sure as hell isn’t going to be me. It’s never going to happen. Ever. So please direct your attention to her over there. We wouldn’t want her to pout any more than she already is.”

I scowl at him. Honestly, who does he think he is? I don’t just bow down and surrender to a puddle of mush every time a hot guy talks to me. I already told him that I’m not like most girls. And I’m especially not like the eyelash-batting bimbo sitting over there. She’s blinking way too much; I swear she has something in her eye, maybe I should ask if she’s OK?

He leans over and whispers in my ear. “You’re going to make me work for you, aren’t you Peaches? Don’t worry, I’m up for a little hard work.” He has a devilish look in his eye and it makes me catch my breath. I can feel his breath on my neck and my arms immediately get covered in goose bumps. My body is a traitor. He looks at my arms, then back up at my face and gives me a small wink. God, could he be any cockier? But he can try all he wants, I won’t budge. My body wants me to budge though, and that thought alone pisses me off.

He turns to look at Miss Eyelashes and says, “My summer was pretty good, spent a lot of time at my grandparents lake house. As for the party Friday night, I’ll be going as long as Abigail here goes with me.”

If looks could kill, then I’d be so dead right now. The glare I’m getting from her is intense. Could this be anymore awkward?

“I already told you, I am not going anywhere with you, ever. So please stop trying.” I focus my attention on Mrs. Shelkey and try my hardest to tune out my surroundings, and by surroundings, I mean Adam. It’s not easy, but I manage to make it the rest of class.  As soon as the bell rings, I’m outta there without a second glance back.

When lunchtime rolls around, I am grateful to see my best friend's face. I have missed her the first half of the day and I can’t wait to be surrounded by someone who doesn’t confuse me for a change. We go through the lunch line, trying to grab something that somewhat resembles food. You’d think they would serve us better food options, it’s like we are in prison. Oh, wait, we are in a form of hell, so I guess the food is acceptable. I settle on a salad and two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches; it’s hard to mess up a meal like that, so it was my safest choice. We find an empty table and sit down.

“God, the first half of my day was such a drag,” Jessie says. “I can’t wait to go to college and move on to college boys.”              

I roll my eyes. Honestly, college will be fun and all, but it shouldn’t be all about partying and boys. I’ll have to keep her in check for sure when we get to college next year.

“Yeah, mine too. I was late for first period, I ran into someone in the hallway, literally ran into someone.” I recapped what happened to me this morning, even the details about Adam’s flirting, hoping she could give me some insight as to what I should do.

“Oh, he’s so hot isn’t he?” Jessie says dreamily. “But don’t get your hopes up, he has never dated anyone from school. All the girls, myself included, have tried to get him to ask us out. He always politely says he’s not interested. It’s interesting that he tried flirting with you, especially giving you a cute nickname,” she says with a confused look on her face.

“Gee thanks, asshole. And Peaches is not a cute nickname.” I glare at her. She didn’t exactly have to point out that I’m not even remotely close to his type.

“You know I didn’t mean it that way, I mean look at you, you’re absolutely beautiful, Abs. You just dress differently than anyone I know, and you’re rough around the edges, if you know what I mean,” she says with a smirk. “He seems sweet and nice, but I think he has a bit of a sad side too, just like you, so you might just be his perfect match and the one girl who can finally lay claim to Mr. Adam Alexander.”

“I do not care to lay a claim to anyone, and it especially isn’t going to be Adam. He is cocky, arrogant, and it will never happen. So just drop it, Jessie, and forget I even told you. And I am not that sad,” I add as an afterthought. I know she isn’t going to drop this. She never just drops anything.

“Yes, Abigail, you are sad. Not all the time, but I see it in your eyes. That’s how I know Adam is sad about something too, he wears the same expressions you wear a lot of the time. But consider it dropped. For now.”

God, I shouldn’t have ever told her. She gives me a coy smile and returns to eating her lunch.

“I think he’s coming to sit down with us, Abigail,” she whispers far too loudly. I glare at her and mouth at her to shut the hell up.

I whip my head around and Adam and two other guys are making their way to our table. Even his walk is sexy. Something about it screams confidence. His eyes are locked on mine, and a smile is tugging at the corners of his lips. I will myself to look away, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. Jessie leans over and nudges me with her elbow.

“Close your mouth, Abigail. Could you make it any more obvious you are drooling over him?” She is laughing at me. Brat. I peel my eyes away from Adam, then pick up a piece of my salad and throw it at her.

“If that stains my shirt, you are so dead.” She scowls at me while wiping off her shirt.

“Yeah, yeah. Your threats have never scared me.” I look up just in time to see Adam standing by our table. One of his friends has already taken a seat next to Jessie. He drapes his arm around her, and to my surprise she doesn’t make him move. She smiles up at him shyly while tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. It’s what she does when she gets nervous. Interesting. I look over at her confused, silently asking her to tell me what’s up with him. She just glares at me and turns her attention back to Max.

“Hey Peaches, mind if I sit down?” He’s already setting his tray down before waiting for my answer.

“Why did you ask my permission if you were going to sit down anyway?” I raise my eyebrow and patiently wait for his reply.

“Touché. But I knew you were going to say yes.” He’s a cocky son of a bitch. I hate that I like it, but dating isn’t in the cards for me. My life is too complicated as it is. I don’t need to add a boyfriend to the mix.

“Well, don’t be so sure of yourself, Mr. Alexander. I have no intentions of eating lunch with you today, or any other day.” I hear Jessie start to laugh.

“Give it up Adam, Abby here will never date you, so you should just stop trying.” Jessie says matter-of-factly.

“What about me? Will you go out on a date with me? I’m way better than Adam, just ask all the ladies,” his other friend says. I just sit there at stare at him in disbelief. What is up with guys hitting on me? “Oh, I’m Bryan, but you can call me whatever you’d like.” He winks at me while picking up a french fry. Ketchup drips down his chin and he wipes it away with the back of his hand. Charming.

“Uh, no. I don’t plan on going out with anybody,” I quietly say.

Adam’s eyes flare, and he gives a hard look to his friend; he has a slightly possessive look in his eye. One that says to back off. “You girls sure know how to wound a guy’s ego, but I have no intentions of giving up just yet. We just met, Peaches, and you are already going to blow me off? You know nothing about me, how do you know we won’t work out if you won’t give me a chance to take you out?” I think he is challenging me, but I am not going to budge.

“I’m sure your ego could be deflated just a little bit, it’s pretty large. I’m surprised there is room for all of us at the table,” I dryly say. Adam throws his head back and laughs loudly.

“I think we’ve got ourselves a live one,” the other friend says. “I’m Max, by the way. I’ve heard a lot about you.” I look over at Jessie and she’s tucking her hair behind her ear again. I need to know more about Jessie and Max, she has never once mentioned him to me. She usually tells me about all the guys she is into, this one must be different.

“This is my friend Abigail I’ve been telling you about. Isn’t she amazing?” Jessie looks over at me and blows me a kiss. I refrain from rolling my eyes. She knows I hate it when she blows me kisses.

I look around at these three guys, and I suddenly get nervous. I don’t like attention from guys. It makes me uncomfortable. I quit believing there were good guys out there a long time ago. I quickly stand up to leave, giving Jessie an apologetic smile. “I have to go do some school work during lunch, so I’ll see you later Jessie.” I turn to look at Adam and think carefully before I say my next words. I’m sure he isn’t a horrible guy, and I can admit that I’m attracted to him, but it just can’t ever happen. Maybe someday I can have a normal life, but not right now. “Adam, I meant it earlier when I said I wasn’t interested, so please stop trying. You don’t want to get mixed up with someone like me anyways, so do yourself a favor and walk away, because that’s exactly what I’m about to do.”

Adam has his index finger resting on his lips, and he looks like he is trying to figure me out. I stare at him for a few seconds longer, wishing for about the millionth time that I had a normal life and that things weren’t so complicated.

I look over at Jessie and she is giving me her sad smile. She understands that my home life is screwed up, and she knows all about my past. I look back at her and she looks happy right now sitting next to Max. But I know she won’t ever let him in, just like I won’t ever let Adam or anyone else in. We both are screwed up in that way. A wave of sadness washes over me, because I want that to happen for us. I want both of us to find love, but the problem is believing that it exist.