Authors: Nicole Deese
“I feel more exposed
like this than I did at the lake, though,” I said, reflecting back on the day
at the lake. I had been in swimwear, but my swim shorts had never come off and
the tankini top had straps.
“That’s nonsense. This
dress is
not
immodest; you are just trying to find a reason to back out.
You
are
wearing this, Tori. It’s beautiful on you. Besides, we have don’t
have time for your second guessing…I already booked us both appointments for a mani-pedi.
We’re going to be late. Now, go get that dress off and lay it out so it doesn’t
wrinkle. I’ll meet you in the car!”
Stacie left before I
could argue. The idea of getting my nails and toes done did sound nice. I
hadn’t done anything like that in a very long time. I took one more glance in
the mirror and wondered what Kai would think of it?
I would know the answer
to that soon enough.
**********
I heard him before I
saw him, chatting it up with Stacie downstairs. I stole a few extra minutes at
the top of the stairs to try and calm my nerves. Currently, they were out of
control. I took several deep breaths, and then walked out onto the landing. The
mirror on the wall grabbed at my attention, glimmering in my peripheral vision.
I turned just for a second and saw what Stacie had created.
My face was perfectly
made-up with eyes that popped from the shimmery metallic shadow and long dark
lashes. My lips were complete with a soft pinkish-pearl lip gloss. Dark hair
cascaded down my back in loose curls from some pinned-up knot at the crown of
my head. I grabbed the silver clutch Stacie had given me, tucked the gloss and
my phone inside, and took my first step down the stairs.
A smile tugged at the
corner of my mouth as I saw him take a step toward the center of the floor near
the bottom of the staircase. The room was silent, except for the loud gasp that
escaped his lips. I couldn’t bring myself to look into his eyes, not yet. I
didn’t like being the center of attention, but I couldn’t help but wonder what
he was thinking. I saw his hand reach out for mine on the last step, feeling an
electric surge race through me as we touched. I looked up then and saw his
face.
Wonderment
.
“Victoria...you’re...stunning.
You look...you look amazing.”
Kai’s voice was soft and
sincere when he spoke. I felt myself flush instantly at his words. I looked
away from his eyes, they were too intense.
“Thank you. You look
great too, Kai,” I said, stepping back to admire his tux. He offered me the
flowers he had set on the side table.
“These are for you my
lady,” Kai said, holding them out to me.
My stomach clenched
again, butterflies releasing everywhere inside of me. I noticed then that
Stacie also held a bouquet of roses.
He brought Stacie
flowers too? Is this guy for real? Can one man actually be this amazing?
Stacie grinned and
nodded at me as if she had read my mind. She took my flowers from me and hugged
us both goodbye, letting me know she wouldn’t wait up. Kai led me out of the
house, his hand never leaving my back as we walked through the driveway.
He helped me up into
his truck, letting our hands linger a few extra seconds as he smiled up at me.
I took a deep breath once he shut my door, trying to release the anxiety I felt
by being so close to him. If there was ever a doubt that Kai was the most
attractive man I had ever known, tonight obliterated it. He was gorgeous.
The drive over was
nice. He filled me in on what the evening would consist of. I noticed how
trained his eyes were on the road when he spoke. Though he would respond to my
questions, he never glanced in my direction…not even once.
The line for the valet
was about ten cars long as we approached the convention center. It was then
that he finally turned his head and looked at me. My heart hammered within my
chest instantly.
“I’m not sure I want to
take you in there,” he said. His eyes shimmered with mischief as he nodded his
head toward the building.
My breath caught at his
statement.
What does he mean?
“I don’t want to share
you tonight, Tori. You’re gonna be quite the distraction among all those guys
in there. I had to
make
myself focus on the road just so I could drive
us here,” he said, laughing to himself.
Though I was sure he
meant it as a compliment, a rush of insecurity blocked my mind from its
comprehension. Slowly I reached across my body and gripped my opposite
shoulder. I wanted to cover up as much of my exposed skin as possible. I hated
myself for forgetting to grab a wrap from Stacie’s closet.
Kai gave me a puzzled
look as we inched our way closer to the front of the valet line. I looked out
the window at the couples walking through the large revolving glass doors. I
tried to keep my face neutral—pleasant even.
A young valet attendant
opened my door. In a second Kai was there, helping me down and pulling me
close. I diverted my gaze.
This is a mistake. Why
did I ever agree to this?
“Tori? Did I say
something wrong?” His arm encircled my waist, creating fire where he touched as
he whispered the words.
The feel of his breath on
my neck sent tingles down my spine as we walked toward the building.
“What? No, not at all,”
I lied, shaking my head and trying to smile.
Apparently, it was less
than convincing.
Kai dropped his arm
from my waist and slid his hand down past my elbow, pulling gently on my wrist.
Carefully, he led me to the wall near the center’s entrance.
“I didn’t mean to make
you to feel self-conscious when I said you’d be a distraction tonight. I
realize that a girl like you doesn’t aim to be the center of attention, but
that’s exactly what will make you one. You’re stunning, Tori. There is
absolutely nothing you should feel self-conscious about.”
He spoke with such
sweet conviction; I almost believed him—
almost
. I lifted my eyes to his
and flashed him a timid smile. He smiled back while reaching for my hand. Together,
we walked into the building. I took one last deep breath and silently prepared
for a night full of people.
**********
The room was beyond
anything I had ever seen or could possibly describe. The details were
astonishing. The banquet hall had been transformed into a midnight garden
wonderland with trees, flowers, lights and candles. The ceiling and walls were
covered in fabrics that were perfectly matched to the theme. Vines and
trellises bordered every corner. An outrageous number of small white twinkle
lights swooped and draped everywhere I looked. It was positively breathtaking.
The tables were emerald
and silver, each with a large twinkling topiary tree in its center. Place cards
were written in calligraphy and small white truffle boxes sat on each plate. I
looked at Kai who was equally as impressed. We laughed together in amazement.
He linked his arm
through mine. Leaning down he whispered, “Shall I escort you to our table, Miss
Sales?”
The four-course dinner
was served in between the evening’s scheduled events. As a comedy duo
introduced each speech or act, we enjoyed some of the finest food that Dallas
had to offer. The silent auction had taken place in a separate room and the
results would be read aloud toward the end of the evening, prior to the dance.
I had met at least a dozen EMTs who worked with Kai, each having been familiar
with who I was—knowing my name before it was spoken.
Briggs had been my
favorite introduction of the night. He was quite the character, and he was also
Kai’s best friend. He teased Kai relentlessly as he told me just how much Kai
talked about me during their long evenings at the station. I knew I had
blushed, but I had also laughed at his funny antics.
I watched as Kai and
Briggs pretended to have a boxing match just a few feet from me. They were
nothing but grown-up boys in suits. In the end they man-hugged (one swift hard
pat on the back), and I could easily see just how strong their brotherly-bond
was.
“Has Kai told you about
the camping trip next month?” Briggs asked, smoothing out his ruffled dirty-blond
hair.
“Uh…no,” I answered,
unsure who I was to be addressing.
Kai shoved Briggs away playfully,
and took a step closer to me.
“Well, I wasn’t sure if
you’d be interested, but I was planning to mention it later this evening, that
is if Briggs will let me get a word in.”
Kai scowled at him. I
laughed again at the show they put on.
“What is it exactly?” I
asked.
“It’s an annual trip
that a bunch of the guys from the station put on...out in hill country. We try
to do it in early November when the weather is cool and the hiking is good-”
Kai started.
“And sometimes ladies
join us. Wives, girlfriends, random strangers...you know what I mean,” Briggs
interrupted.
“That’s it. You’re
done
talking to her,” Kai joked. He lunged toward him as Briggs ducked just out of his
reach.
I watched them, laughing,
as they dodged small pockets of people around the floor. Several older women glared
at them as if they were behaving like disobedient children.
I felt a tap on my
shoulder and turned, ready to say, “No thank you” again to the waiter carrying
champagne.
But it was not the
waiter.
“Victoria?” the petite
woman asked.
No.
Oh God, no.
This can’t be
happening.
“It is...it’s you!” the
woman exclaimed. She attacked me, embracing me in a hug so tight I could hardly
breathe. Her presence alone was enough to suck the air from my lungs.
“Johanna?” I whispered.
I was shocked I could even speak her name. Everything in me wanted to shut down
entirely—cease to be.
“Victoria, you look beautiful!
I can’t tell you how good it is for me to see you here, honey. I’ve prayed for
you so much during this last year. I didn’t know you were back in town.”
Oh God.
What do I even say?
“You look...you look
good too, Johanna. Why...are you here?” I stuttered. My head felt as it was
floating away from my body. Black spots were interrupting my vision. I blinked
several times trying to focus.
“My nephew’s being
honored tonight. He invited me. I’m sorry I startled you. I thought I saw you
earlier, but I wasn’t sure. I never got a chance to talk to you after the
memorial service...and then I heard you’d moved from Dallas.”
My heart rate
quickened, my eyes darting for ways of escape.
I can’t do this.
I can’t talk to her.
This isn’t supposed to
happen.
I saw Kai walking
toward me then and felt instantly conflicted. Would he add to my distress or
relieve me of it? He had no idea the magnitude this conversation held for me.
With easy, carefree steps, he walked straight into my worst nightmare.
I was a blinking orb of
guilt; he was the victim drawn-in by my toxic light.
“Yes, I moved to
Phoenix for a while...for work,” I said slowly, seeing Kai’s sweet, innocent
smile as he walked up to us. He extended his hand to Johanna like a gentleman.
“Hi, I’m Tori's date,
Kai Alesana. How do you two lovely ladies know each other?” he asked.
Johanna laughed lightly
at the compliment. I didn’t move a muscle.
“I’m Johanna
Watson...an old friend of Tori's.”
“Oh, well that’s great,
it’s nice to meet you,” Kai said.
Kai smiled, but it
wasn’t his usual happy-go-lucky smile. This one looked odd and out of place. He
looked how I felt, like he wasn’t sure what was supposed to happen next.
I couldn’t wait a
second longer. I
had
to exit.
I excused myself,
leaving them behind in a cloud of awkwardness. Without looking back, I
increased my stride as I rushed through the banquet hall toward the ladies room.
You’re okay; You’re
fine.
Just get to the
restroom...you can sort it all out in there.
“Victoria! Wait,
please!”
How did she catch up to
me so fast?
I stopped just outside
of the restroom door. Johanna was next to me then, tears rolling down her
cheeks. My heart ached unbearably.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t
think that seeing me would upset you like this, please forgive me for being so
insensitive,” she said reaching her arm out and touching my hand.
“Forgive
you
?
Johanna, yes...seeing you is a bit of a shock, but there is nothing you
ever need to ask
my
forgiveness for.”
I was surprised at how
easily the words flowed, but they were truth. For all the words I couldn’t say,
somehow I had found the courage to speak those. She reached for my hand,
holding it firmly.