Allie's War Season Three (156 page)

Jon slid the rest of the way into the water, still a little thrown by how hot the water remained after four shampoos of the seer's hair. Once he was all the way in, Wreg tried to pin him against the wall of the tub. His large hands curled around Jon's shoulders as he pressed his body against his. Jon pushed him back, laughing again, but found himself exploring the seer with his hands under the water in spite of himself, invasively enough that Wreg's pain worsened, catching Jon's breath, bringing that nausea back to his belly.

He found himself thinking that Wreg hadn't been kidding; he really was hurting in that area. Sometimes Jon knew Wreg just wanted to play, or that being a horny seer was part of his persona, but this time, Wreg fought Jon's hands openly once Jon started touching him.

Jon found himself gripping the seer's wet hair, sending a sharp pulse of warning at his light.

Immediately, Wreg stopped fighting him, but he didn't release Jon's arms.

"What do you think you're doing, brother?" Jon said. "I thought we established the ground rules of this little scenario?"

Wreg eyes glimmered with frustration. "All bets are off, if you're going to pull on me like this..."

"I'm
pulling on you?"

"So much so that I'm about to lose my fucking mind." Pain reached his voice. "Are you really angry at me? Why? Did someone tell you about that bullshit in Third Jewel? Because I
stopped
him. Maybe you heard the story wrong, because of what I said..."

"What?” Jon said, puzzled. “What bullshit in the Third Jewel?"

Wreg hesitated, staring between his eyes.

Seeming to weigh it back and forth, he shrugged then, dismissive.

“Just Nenz,” he said, gesturing vaguely. “He had some issue this morning. He wants Allie bonded more closely to the group. He has his reasons...but he was being a little punk about it. She said no, and he tried to pull her into it anyway...”

“Revik was being a punk...how?” Jon said. He stared back at the seer, feeling himself tense, even before his mind caught up with the seer’s words. “Revik wants Allie more bonded to the group? How? What did he try to pull her into?”

Wreg studied his face, his dark eyes suddenly wary.

After again seeming to go back and forth in his mind, he shrugged again, as if to minimize it.

“He wants to bond the group more tightly together,” he said, noncommittal. Seeing understanding touch Jon’s eyes, he gripped his thigh. “Jon...he wants you a part of it, too,” he said. “Don’t make this into something it’s not. It’s a seer thing...and anyway, Balidor and I talked him down. Don’t be too hard on Nenz, either. It’s what he knows, and he’s dealing with a lot of fear right now, for his wife along with everything else. That Ditrini shit really rattled him...” Seeing Jon frown, Wreg looked away, frowning himself. “...Anyway, it’s how things used to be done. With the rebels, too...” Seeing Jon’s eyebrow go up sharply at the last, Wreg trailed, the expression on his face more cautious. “Well,” he said. “You know what I mean.”

“No,” Jon said. “I really don’t. What was done with the rebels?”

Wreg stared between his eyes, his expression openly wary now.

Jon felt the older seer blank out his mind, but not before he found he understood.

"l'thir li' dare,"
Jon cursed under his breath, staring at the Chinese seer.

It didn't occur to him until later that the curse he'd used was in Old Prexci, or that he must have gotten from Wreg himself, since none of the younger seers used it.

"You goddamned bastard," Jon spat, still staring at him. "You slept with Allie? You actually fucking
slept
with her? With the rebels?"

"What? No!" Wreg stared back at him. From the look on his face, he seemed to not only mean it, but to realize the depth of his mistake.
"D' gaos,
Jon...no. No, I didn't
sleep
with her. Are you serious? Nenzi would have cut off my balls..."

"Then what
did
you do?"

Wreg continued to stare at him, shock still shimmering in his eyes.

When Jon prodded him with his light to speak, Wreg looked away.

Jon felt his jaw harden more as the seer's expression grew increasingly uncomfortable. That time, when Wreg looked back at him, his eyes held more than a little caution. Releasing Jon’s legs, he moved back, putting a few feet between them. Half-treading water in the deepest part of the pool, he shrugged his broad, tattooed shoulders. Glancing again at Jon's expression, which must have worsened in the pause, he sighed, clicking a little, as if to himself.

His voice lost every shred of its humor though.

"Nenz...I think he wanted to bond her more with the team back then, too," he said grimly, right before he gave another shrug, that time using the seer version. "He was insecure about her. He'd told me before that...before the Registry job, I mean...that the Bridge still hadn't committed to staying with him past the six months they'd initially agreed on. We all thought he was nuts. Of course she would stay. None of us could imagine her leaving, not anymore, not after everything we'd all been through together..." A touch of anger reached his voice, just before he shrugged again, avoiding Jon's eyes that time. "...It's not a big deal, Jon. It used to be standard in a lot of military groups. None of us touched her."

But Jon had already picked up enough from Wreg's light that his jaw hardened.

"I see," he said, fighting to keep the fury from his voice, along with a harder thread of disgust. "You didn't touch her. You just watched her and Revik have sex. Oh. And got off on it enough to all screw each other. Nice."

"I didn't touch her!" Wreg said, his voice holding more anger that time. "Goddamn it, Jon. Be reasonable about this..."

"Sure. You didn't touch her. You just screwed two other women while you watched my sister get fucked by her husband. That's great, Wreg. Lovely."

"That kind of thing used to be
normal
, Jon!" Wreg said, his voice sliding back into defensiveness. "...The Lao Hu probably did something similar with her, to bond her to the group. Something a lot less conjugal than what I was a part of..."

Jon felt a little sick as he shook his head. "Not helping, Wreg."

"Gods damn it, Jon...I didn't
know
you then. I hadn't had an exclusive partner in about
forty years
. And I was in pain. Hell,
all
of us were. We'd been going through that bonding crap with Nenz and his wife for months by then..."

Jon wasn't listening to him anymore, though.

Standing abruptly, he climbed out of the tub before the thought fully formed in his head.

When his eyes took in anything again, he was pulling back on the dirty combat clothes, without bothering to dry himself off beforehand. The shirt stuck to his chest even as he threw the vest on over it, picking up the holster and gun and throwing them over his shoulder. Wreg just watched him at first, not speaking. Jon felt the seer trying to get at his light, but when Jon shoved him off forcefully, giving him a warning glare, Wreg's face went the palest Jon had ever seen it.

Ignoring that, too, he started for the door, when a loud splash of water startled him enough to
 
make him turn. Wreg vaulted out of the tub, moving so quickly Jon found himself flinching back, despite of his own anger. The tall seer blocked the doorway before Jon realized he'd managed to get in front of him. Staring up at him, Jon flinched again, that time at the fear in the other's eyes. He closed his light instinctively, but he knew it was mainly so he wouldn't have to feel the rest of what he could see on that high-cheekboned face.

"Get out of my way, Wreg," he said, his voice more hostile than he'd intended. He forced his tone lower before he went on, averting his gaze. "You said to tell you if I need space. I need space. Right now."

"Jon...brother. Please.
Please.
Don't go like this...please..."

Jon shook his head, trying to step around the taller man, but Wreg moved to block his way. Jon realized his fists were clenching even as his arms tightened at his sides. He couldn't think clearly, didn't seem to be able to pull his mind into any space he could recognize. He wanted to hurt the man, and he'd never wanted to hurt anyone before...not like this.

He shouldn't
ever
want to hurt someone he was sleeping with.

But that made no sense to the other part of his mind, either.

That pain was back, worse than before, making it difficult to think through the rest. This wasn't him, he found himself thinking. He wasn't
this
guy...he'd never been this guy. As much as he loved Revik, he'd hated how totally pathological he got over Allie, how he'd seemed almost willing to hurt her to keep her from leaving him, psychologically or otherwise.

Now he felt the same. He was doing
the same fucking thing.
Right now. With a man he'd only been sleeping with for a few weeks.

A man he barely knew.

Jesus. He really was turning into one of them.

Feeling his throat close, he tried to push past Wreg again, but the seer caught his arm.

"No, brother...no!" he said, his voice holding more of that fear. "Jon...this is normal. It is normal for us. Right now it is, anyway. But it won't last. I swear to you it won't. Please...please, don't make this about me..."

"This?" Jon said, wiping his face angrily. "This is normal Wreg? Really? Because I want to beat your head in right now..."

"I know, brother...I know you do. But it's all right. I trust you. You can control this..."

"You shouldn't trust me, Wreg. You really shouldn't right now..."

"I know this is new for you," Wreg said, his voice gruff. "I know it is, but it
is
normal. It doesn't happen with everyone, but it does happen..."

"Not to me," Jon snapped. "This isn't normal for
me
..."

"Yes...it
is,
Jon. Goddamn it..." Wreg's hands tightened on his arms. "It
is
now. You're not used to it, I know...and I'm so very sorry I caused this, brother. But it's who you are now. Who you are becoming..."

"No." Jon shook his head, shoving the seer's hands off him. "No, goddamn it." It was the only word that made sense to him right then, the only one he could hold on to. "Then
no,
man...I won't." He shook his head again. "I'm sorry. I won't. I won't walk this 'normal seer' road with you, all right? This isn't me. I don't give a
fuck
what you say. This isn't me. I won't do it..."

He shoved at the seer's chest as he said it, forcing his way past. He hurt him that time, and winced along with the seer, even as that darker feeling twisted in his gut.

That time, Wreg got out of his way.

Guilt wrenched at Jon when he remembered the injuries, but he didn’t stop walking.

All he could think was go, get out of here. He felt grief on Wreg, a hard pulse that nearly stopped him in his tracks, screwing up the rhythm of his steps enough that he half-stumbled into the living room, feeling his throat close until he couldn’t breathe. He walked faster for the door, not stopping for his things, not even looking down for the bag on his way out. He didn't take another breath until he reached the elevator doors at the end of the hall.

Wreg didn't follow him. The suite door remained closed.

Jamming his finger on the button for 'down,' Jon shut his light tighter, almost in desperation as he put his hands over his ears, fighting to get the other's light away from his.

He could feel Wreg still, even behind Jon’s own attempts to shield. The seer seemed to be slamming against his light in erratic bursts, nearly in a state of panic. Jon blanked his mind as the doors opened in front of him, bringing a relief that also closed his throat. Entering the car, he prayed there wouldn't be another earthquake so the ex-rebel wouldn't have to fish him out of the elevators, on top of everything else. Thumbing the first numbered button that came into his head, he checked his back pocket only after the elevator was already moving, letting out an exhale when he found the card key where he'd left it.

He didn't think another coherent thought until the elevator let him off.

Even then, Wreg didn't leave his light alone, not until Jon got on his headset and told the front desk not to issue Wreg a key to Jon's assigned room, no matter what the reason. The seer working the desk stammered a bit, but agreed to do as he'd asked.

After that, Jon didn't feel Wreg anymore.

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